Baby You Can Stop Running
by brighteyes87
Summary: Bella has been running away from her past since graduating from Forks High School. What happens when an accident brings her back to the small town and she meets a doctor who is just as lonely as she is? My first Twilight story! ExB Please R/R! AU/AH
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or any of the characters…**

**A/N: So this is my first Twilight story... I'm a recent Twilight convert, and by recent I mean I was only introduced to the goodness that is Edward Cullen. Anyways, I would love to hear what you think about the story so far so please feel free to leave me reviews so I know if I should keep going with it!**

**Baby You Can Stop Running**

**Chapter One**

_**Bella**_

If someone had told me that I would someday return to Forks, I would have told them they were crazy, that there was no way I would ever step foot into that small town, riddled with so many memories that I only wanted to forget. Then again, I hadn't been expecting the phone call that woke me up at two in the morning telling me that Charlie was in the hospital either. Emmett had sounded overwrought and although he told me that it wasn't necessary to come home, I knew that was what I had to do; I couldn't leave him to care for Charlie alone. Therefore, like any responsible daughter, I shot out of bed, called an airline to find the first flight out of San Francisco International to SeaTac, before proceeding to stuff a suitcase full of warm clothes. I was likely to freeze when I got there, even though San Francisco wasn't the warmest place in California, it definitely wasn't like Forks.

Unlike the rest of my graduating class, which consisted of less than one-hundred students, I was excited about leaving and when Stanford offered me what basically equated to a full ride, I jumped at the chance and did all I could to pick up extra shifts at the Newton's store to save extra money. While the rest of my classmates took weekend trips to La Push or Port Angeles, I stayed behind taking care of Charlie and saving the fruits of my labor. Emmett would have given me hell if he had known, I was sure of that, but thankfully, he had shipped himself off to the University of Washington in Seattle, and at least it was one extra person off my back.

So now, here I was sitting in a plane, taking me back to Forks. Emmett had agreed to pick me up even though I told him I could manage. Renting a car wasn't exactly something that would have been hard, but he had insisted. And, although I wasn't looking forward to going back, I was excited to see my brother again. I knew how hard it was on him when I told him that I wouldn't ever come back, though he understood as he knew and respected my reasons. He had come down to visit occasionally, I promised him that I would always have a spare bedroom for him, but San Francisco wasn't his kind of place. He seemed to agree more with the small town life that Forks provided for him, whereas I relished it, loved that I could go to the store and not worry about running into someone I knew.

Emmett and I were always so different from each other: he was graced with well, grace and strength and stunning good looks that he seemed to inherit from our father's younger days. I on the other hand was the world's biggest klutz, a running joke between Emmett and I, as well as pretty much anyone I ever got to know, and when it came to looks, well I considered myself plain: dark brown hair, and dark brown eyes that only seemed to make me look even more like a ghost thanks to my pale skin. Emmett always teased, saying I looked like a doll, like one of the ones Renee use to buy me when I was younger, before she and Charlie had split, before she moved on and married Phil, before she moved to Florida.

But that was basically ancient history, right now my mind was focused on one thing; avoiding Jacob Black. Emmett had assured me that he wouldn't be around, that I wouldn't have to worry about him, he rarely left La Push. But still, Forks was a small town, surely word would have spread that I would be making the two hour flight back to the town, back to visit my ailing father. Jacob knew me better than that, knew that I wasn't the kind of girl to not come. Had Charlie been anyone else I was sure the news never would have reached La Push but being the police chief and a very, very close friend of Billy Black, Jacob's father, I knew he would be expecting me.

_**Edward**_

I walked into Charlie Swan's room and looked around. I had been expecting to find Emmett, his son who always stopped by in the early hours of the morning before going to work. Glancing at the clock on the wall I saw that it was indeed eight in the morning, although his tall, intimidating frame was nowhere to be found. Resolving to look for him later, I picked up the chart that hung on the bed and looked over it, checking his vitals that the nurses took every hour or so. No change.

He had survived the surgery, and I myself considered it one of the most successful surgeries of my career. The bullets were deep however, and I knew that it had caused a lot of trauma to his body. A shooting in Forks, even thinking about it I tried hard not to laugh, after all, someone had been killed and now Charlie was fighting a thin line between life and death. Still, it was one of the last things anyone would have ever expected to hear about, at least, in a town as small as this one. My internship in New York had prepared me for this, and, the only reason why I bothered to take the offer of doing my residency in Forks was because I was tired of big city life.

Before my parents passed away, before Carlisle and Esme had taken me in, I lived in Chicago. I can't remember all that much about those times, I know that I was happy, but sometimes I wonder if that had more to do with my parents than being in the city. When I was ten my parents were in a fatal car accident while driving home from a charity event on June 10. That night was the coldest night that summer. I had been home with my nanny, and when she woke me up at eleven with the news and I felt like my world had come crashing down on me. Looking back on it now, I suppose I never really recovered from it. True, I was luckier than more orphans were; my dad was a doctor and had known Carlisle for years, both having met while doing their internships in Los Angeles and he and his wife had agreed to take me in, so I went from being Edward Anthony Masen, to Edward Anthony Cullen. I should clarify, they never insisted that I take their name, but when I moved in with them, I realized that I didn't want to answer all the questions that came with moving in with a new family. It was easier that way, easier to become a new person than to explain who I was.

Charlie stirred as I put the chart back down and walked to the monitor to read the charts that were constantly printing. I felt my eyebrows pull into the v that my body so often created when I was concerned and I did all I could to stifle the sigh that was aching to be released, the last thing I wanted was to frighten my patient.

"Dr. Cullen?" His voice spoke roughly. It made sense; his body was still weak, even speaking wasn't easy for him.

"How are you feeling this morning Mr. Swan?" I turned to watch his face intently. One of the things that Carlisle said had always made me such a good doctor, even at my young age of twenty seven, was my ability to read my patients. For example, Charlie was a tough man, on the outside at least. He hated to show his physical pain, a trait that I assumed he had picked up from years on the force, a macho behaviorism that seemed to go hand in hand with his profession. But I knew that there was more to him than that. It was the look in his eyes that told me that, the pleading with Emmett to bring home his daughter from wherever she had run away from. The man was broken inside, and I knew what that felt like, it was probably one of the reasons that I took to him so much, why I had made him unofficially one of my biggest priorities.

"Better than yesterday." He lied and I smiled politely, picking the chart up once more and ticking off one of the boxes that I realized the nurse had failed to do.

"Well that's good to hear." I responded, putting the chart down once again. "I was hoping to speak to Emmett this morning, do you know where I might be able to find him?"

Charlie looked confused for a minute before I saw the wave of relief spread across his face. Had I been able to read his mind I would have guessed he was afraid that like his daughter, Emmett too had run off, no longer wanting to deal with him, no longer wanting to bear the burden that seemed to stem from being around him. I watched as a small smile played on his thin lips. "He went to pick up Bella this morning from the airport. My baby girl is coming home."

I had never heard him speak of his daughter so fondly. I knew that he missed her, that he loved her, but I also knew how much he resented her leaving and rarely keeping in touch. He blamed himself, that much I was certain about but from Emmett's reactions each time her name was brought up, I knew it was more than that.

"That's wonderful. I'm sure you're excited to see her."

"I am." He smiled as his eyes closed and he drifted off to sleep once again.

I snuck out of the room and went to my office, sinking down into the chair. My shift was officially over but I wanted to stick around to talk with Emmett, and seeing as Charlie was under the impression that he would be around later this morning, making a drive back to my house impractical, it wasn't like I'd have to be back in the afternoon, I actually had a weekend off, though I was certain I would stop by to check on Charlie a few times, just to be certain, it's not like there was much else to do around the small city.

_**Bella**_

"Bells!" I heard the voice shout across the other side of the luggage carousel, causing me to look up from the carrier belt and smile wide. I abandoned my spot and began to walk over towards my brother who was standing there, his large frame sticking out amongst the others. I must not have been paying attention to my strides because the next thing I knew I was on the floor, the cold linoleum just inches from my chin and I heard his loud laugh billow through the air, my cheeks turning bright red as I noticed that everyone was now staring at me. _Good job Bells… Way to bring attention to yourself._ I should have been expecting that to happen, I had managed to get from my apartment in San Francisco to here without any mishaps, well, until I managed to trip over my own feet in my attempt to make it towards my brother.

"Oh Bells…" He laughed reaching down and pulling me to my feet. "Are you okay?"

"Except for the fact that I've drawn more attention to myself than I'd like I'm great."

"Nothing broken?"

"Not this time." I smiled and put my arms around his waist, hugging him close to me. "It's so good to see you."

"It's good to see you too Bells." He responded hugging me tightly back.

"Em?"

"Yeah?"

"Can't breathe!" I gasped for air as he laughed and released me.

"Sorry… I forget how breakable you are sometimes. Let's get your things and we can drop them off at the house before we head to the hospital." He said and I could see the look in his eyes, the one that told me he wasn't sure that Charlie would come out of this…


	2. Chapter 2

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or the characters, sadly.**

**Baby You Can Stop Running**

**Chapter Two**

**BPOV**

The house, at least from the outside, hadn't changed since I had left, not that I found that surprising. Even when I went to live with Renee, after the divorce, before she married Phil, each summer that I would come to visit Charlie and Emmet, who had chosen to stay with Charlie in Forks, the house never changed. Even after she remarried, Charlie kept the pictures of their wedding hanging on the walls, a constant reminder of the life that he lost, the love that he lost. So it really shouldn't have surprised me when I saw the red truck, my old, rusted red truck, parked in the driveway. Emmet must have seen the look on my face, the surprise. In my mind I figured he would have sold it, made money off his misfortune, a sign that he disowned the daughter who he thought never appreciated him.

"Just in case you ever did decide to come home." Emmet said, his eyes looking at the truck and then at me. "I told him it wasn't likely but he wouldn't hear anything of it."

I hung my head in shame. Leaving was truly the only option that I had, the only way to leave the town and avoid the rumors, avoid the stares and the shame that would follow me for my life if anyone had found out. In a small town, secrets don't ever stay a secret, everyone is too involved in each other's lives to keep things under a blanket for too long. Emmet was the only one I trusted with my secret, my secrets, and I was thankful that I had him but I hated myself for putting him in the middle of my father and I. He didn't seem to mind but I did, I always felt guilty making him bear a burden that he really never should have had, especially alone. It wasn't fair to him.

"He must think I hate him." I said softly, opening the door of his Jeep and stepping out. I ran my hand along the red truck, noting that there were more rust spots on it then I had remembered, likely a result of the constant wet weather. Even now, the month of October barely starting, the air was wet. Washington weather is unlike any other that I had ever experienced, the rain was rarely the rain that many other states experience, here it was like a mist, a mist that never seemed to go away, that would wrap you in a cold, wet blanket, sticking to your hair, your face, your clothes until you were soaked to the core. The truck probably barely ever had a chance to dry out, maybe a few random days in which the sun would happen to peek through the dark clouds, but other than that, rust seemed inevitable, especially on a car as old as mine. Still, I forgot how much I loved it, how much a part of me it was.

"He doesn't hate you Bells. He's just…" His voice dropped off, and I knew that he wanted to search for the right word, not wanting to harm my sensitive, delicate feelings. _Hmph, sensitive, delicate? No, that boat had long set sail. _"He just doesn't understand why."

"Come on Em. We both know that he thinks I'm just like Re… Mom." I corrected myself. Though I had once called my parents by the names that were customary for children to call their parents, mom and dad, when I moved I decided to put that part of my life behind me as well. Being back in Forks I knew I would have to make sure that I didn't slip up, I wasn't sure exactly how Charlie would react to me calling him by his real name and not dad, though I guessed it ranged on the line of hurt. "Getting up and leaving because he thought I wasn't happy here." Emmet's lack of response was all the answer I needed to know that I was right.

"The keys are still in the house if you want to drive it." He changed the subject, pulling my suitcase from the back of the car and setting it down on the driveway. "The car could probably use a good drive, I think it's been a while since anyone has taken it out."

"That's because you don't like that it doesn't go fast enough." I teased and watched as he smiled and shrugged. I probably should have been more honest, when I said that I didn't want Emmet to pick me up, it was mainly because his driving terrified me. Never one to live on the edge, the speed that Emmet liked to drive at, let's just say I equated it to someone trying to break the sound barrier. He always was the thrill seeker that I never seemed to be. Then again, he wasn't an uncoordinated disaster like I was. I probably would have spent more time making reckless decisions if I wasn't so concerned that I would kill myself.

"If you want to rest for a bit before we go to the hospital that's okay. I called into work today and told them that I needed a personal day." He commented, pulling the on the handle of my luggage as he walked to the house, stopping briefly to look over his shoulder at me, a small smile on his lips. "Besides dad's usually out of it until noon or so, and knowing you, you probably were too anxious to sleep after I woke you up."

"I just wish you had called sooner."

"I wasn't sure that you would have come home." His key hit the lock and he opened it in one swift move.

"I guess I deserve that comment." My eyes were taking in the room, everything was exactly the same, the furniture, the pictures. It amazed me that after all these years he hadn't bothered to replace anything. Though, that probably had something to do with the fact that he was rarely ever home. If we wasn't working he was out fishing, or visiting Billy Black in La Push. My voice got quiet as I looked at Emmet, unintentionally placing my small hand on his large arm, only briefly admiring the way it looked, how small and fragile it made me seem in comparison. "You don't believe that right?"

"I don't know Bells…" He sighed, stopping at the foot of the stairs to turn to look my way. "When you left things were just so…"

"Messy?" I whispered, looking down trying not to meet his gaze.

"I guess that's one way to put it. I guess I just wasn't sure where you stood and with Jacob…" His voice trailed as he watched my cheeks burn red though I wasn't sure why. My feelings for him were gone, long gone when I had learned what kind of a person he really was. "Well, I mean, coming back would certainly mean running into him again and that was something I never would want to put you through."

"Still… We're family. We should have stuck together. I shouldn't have abandoned you like I did. It wasn't fair." I could feel the tears forming in my eyes and as I tried to blink them back I realized that they were just too wet and before I knew it I could feel the warm, salty liquid on my cheek which I brushed away quickly with the back of my hand.

"You did what you had to do." He smiled a small, sad smile before making his way up the stairs, two steps at a time, pausing only once he reached the top to turn to look at me. "You look good kid. Like you finally have come to terms with everything."

"I wouldn't say that completely but it's better. It gets easier each day."

"You've always been a fighter Bells, a fiery ball of clumsiness." He teased, his hand on the door to my bedroom. That was the first change I noted, back before I had left, the door to my room was rarely closed, unless of course I was in it. It must have made things easier for him, not having the constant reminder of an empty room. I stood in the hall and watched as Emmet placed the suitcase in the room, almost too scared to walk into it, not necessarily because I was afraid that it had changed, no, I was pretty certain that everything as exactly the same, down to the dirty clothes that had been left in the basket, but more because it would make this all the more real. It would make my return real, and I was terrified that walking in would stir up the memories that I had spent three years trying to suppress.

I walked in and looked around the room. And just as I had assumed, everything was exactly the same: the wooden floor, the light blue walls, and the yellow lace curtains, each serving as a constant reminder of my childhood, my growth into adult hood, but most importantly, my past, the past that I was running from.

"I haven't slept in a bed that small in a long time." I tried to joke, walking closer but finding that I caught my foot on the rug, stumbling forward but luckily catching myself before I could find myself on the floor for the second time that day. Emmet laughed quietly at my fall prompting me to glare at him which only made him laugh harder. "Okay, out. I'm going to rest for a bit. It's obvious by my lack of dexterity, even more so than usual, that I'm too tired to go just yet. Wake me up in a few hours?"

"Sure thing." He smiled, his eyes still laughing as he closed the door, leaving me alone for the first time since arriving back home.

I ran my fingers on the old computer, the one that I use to use to communicate with Renee when I had only first moved to Forks, something that Renee had insisted on. I couldn't believe it was still here, and I partially wondered if it still worked, it was severely outdated, even Emmet had sprung for a new one for himself. My hand trailed to the pictures on the desk, a few of myself and Angela Weber, my best friend at Forks, even some with the whole group: Mike Newton, Lauren Mallory, Jessica Stanley, Tyler Crowley and Ben Cheney. They were memories and people that I had allowed myself to almost forget. Well not Angela, I sometimes kept in touch with her, we would send e-mails a few times a year, she would update me on how her relationship with Ben was, I even received an invitation to her wedding shower which it looked like I might be able to attend after all.

I moved from the desk to my bed, laying down on it, finding that my body still reacted pleasantly to the old mattress. I hated that things were changing, hated that I was back, hated that Charlie was so badly injured, hated that one town could stir my emotions the way that it did. I missed San Francisco, missed the comfort of the large city, the sounds of the street beneath my window, the distance from Forks. I closed my eyes hoping that I could somehow find sleep, even though my body didn't seem to want it, it was too nervous with the prospect of who I might run into, nervous about Charlie's fate, nervous about my own fate.

The next thing I knew, I felt something hit my face, pulling me from my dreamless sleep and as I opened my eyes Emmet was standing at the door, his mouth moving but I was still too groggy to hear anything that was coming out of his mouth.

"Do you hear me?" He yelled._ Well yeah I heard that idiot._ I thought before pulling myself up, propping my weight on the palms of my hands.

"What?"

"Dr. Cullen called and said that he wanted to talk to me. I need to go down there now, as it is apparently he's been waiting for me to show up all morning."

"What time is it?"

"You've been asleep for about an hour. Just take the truck and meet me there."

"Okay." I groaned, swinging my legs over the edge of the bed and shakily finding my footing. "I'll just clean up first, I'm sure they don't want plane germs circulating around a clean hospital." He nodded and disappeared, just as quickly as he had appeared, oh how I envied his nimbleness.

**EPOV**

There was a knock on the office door and I placed the papers that I had been holding back on the desk, calling for whomever it was to come in, hoping that it wasn't the chief coming to yell at me for still being there. As it was I was over my hours this week, one of the reasons that he had insisted that I take the weekend off. Like it was my fault that there was a shooting in Forks and more people than usual needed to be looked after? I'm not denying that I throw myself into my work, it's just easier that way, the loneliness isn't as palpable when I'm constantly moving and now that my best friend was in love with my younger sister, there was even less to look forward to.

"I'm sorry I wasn't here this morning." Emmet Swan's husky voice interrupted the train of thought that I found myself in, and I stood up, offering my hand in a handshake. I wasn't even sure why we still went through the formalities of the patient doctor relationship. Over the two weeks that Charlie Swan had been in the hospital I found myself in Emmet's company. He was easy to talk to and it seemed like he needed someone around, with his sister AWOL, he just seemed like he needed someone to talk to.

"Don't worry about it Emmet." I replied, sitting back down and motioning for Emmet to do the same in the oversized leather chair that permanently sat on the opposite side of my desk for conferences like this.

"What's wrong?"

I hated conversations like this. How do you tell someone that you aren't sure their father is going to pull through? Had he been only a few years younger I wouldn't have been so concerned but it had been two weeks and Charlie hadn't shown any signs of improvement. I found myself sighing slightly, not wanting to make eye contact with him. Emmet wasn't hard to read, I had pegged him pretty quickly and it was probably one of the reasons that I felt so comfortable about him. He, like his father was prone to machoism, a learned trait, at least, that's what I assumed. He was unusually quiet, although that changed once you got to know him, he loved his sister though they spoke infrequently, and he was desperately in love with his college girlfriend, Rosealie Hale who moved to Seattle but commuted to Los Angeles a few times every year for her job as a junior fashion editor for a magazine.

He must have grown concerned from my silence, my inability to tell him what I knew I had to as his father's physician. "Should I wait until Bells gets here?"

"Bells?" I questioned, forgetting the nickname that both he and Charlie used for the family member I had not met.

"Bella. Sorry… She didn't get much sleep last night so she was taking a nap and it was then that I got your message and left her to clean up…" He glanced at the clock on the wall before continuing. "She should be here soon though."

I shook my head. It was hard enough to tell him, the last thing I wanted was to tell someone I barely knew what was going on. Besides, he could probably break the news to her better than I could. "No… I just thought that you should be aware of what is happening…" I looked at him, noticing that his eyes seemed far away. "I'm just not sure if he is going to pull through and I want you to be prepared. I'm not giving up hope and I'm not going to stop treating your father, I just think you should know that it's been two weeks and there hasn't been any significant change in his vitals…"

He didn't respond, he just stood there, looking more intimidating than ever. "How am I suppose to tell Bells that?" I heard him whisper. I felt for him, truly. "I should go check on him." He responded, standing up and making his way out the door. "Thanks Edward."

I didn't have a chance to respond, he had left before I had the chance to look up. I would give him a little bit of time before I stopped by Charlie's room again, just to check on him and get a glimpse at the infamous Bella Swan who had gained the reputation of being the prodigal daughter, though I assumed that that wasn't true. There was more to the story that the town, that Charlie didn't know, and the only person who held those secrets were her brother and I was curious to know what they were, curious to know what had driven the girl to leave and not look back, at least, until she learned of her father's dire status.

**A/N: So I'm really excited about this story which is why I updated so quickly, usually it takes me a lot longer but my mind is pulsing with ideas that I just have to get written out before I forget them! I wanted to thank my two reviewers who actaully made me want to post the new chapter, as well as those who have already added this to their alerts/favorites! You guys rock! Anyways, I hope the second chapter lived up the first and I hope to hear from people to let me know what they think! Thanks again!**


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter Three**

**BPOV**

Finding the keys to the truck wasn't hard; they were exactly where they always were. I pulled my jacket on, holding it close to my body as I walked carefully down the driveway to the truck, opening the door quickly before getting in. I didn't move for a bit, just kept my hands on the wheel as I sat there, smelling the familiar scent, and looking around the cab. Emmet had left it exactly the same, deep down I was slightly worried that he would have fiddled with the engine, changed the radio, but no, it was exactly as I left it. The key was in the ignition a few moments later and the loud engine purred like a mountain lion about to attack. I was finally ready to face everything that I had left such a mess head on.

Just like Charlie's house, Forks had not changed a bit. Well, that might have been an exaggeration, the buildings had been painted, something that they assumed would make it look more appealing. Still, I suppose somehow the fact that some things that never changed might have been a little bit comforting. The drive to the hospital didn't take long and before I knew it, I was pulling into the parking lot, quickly finding a parking spot not too far from Emmet's Jeep. Stepping out I surveyed the parking lot, taking in the surroundings and the cars that filled it, not surprised to not see the luxury cars that so often drove down the streets of San Francisco, no the most expensive car in this parking lot was a gleaming silver Volvo. How it managed to shine in the rain, I still had no idea.

The mist still filled the air and as I walked through the doors I brushed a little of the water that had clung to my face off before pulling off my jacket. I knew this hospital like the back of my hand, Emmet use to tease me that they would make me their official mascot with the amount of visits I made each year while living there. If not their mascot, then I could have given them tours, both Charlie and Emmet had the doctors and nurses on their speed dial, just in case, at least, that's what they always told me.

"Bella Swan!" I heard a voice call out, causing me to turn, startled that someone had already seen me, I had what, been in town for three hours now? As I turned, I saw a woman standing there, her hair dark and curly, and had I not known the voice, I probably wouldn't have recognized her. _Shit, Angela is going to be pissed that I didn't tell her I was here, and now that Jessica knows, it's going to be all over town._ I put on the best smile that I could as I watched her approach.

"Jessica Stanley." I felt her arms around me as she pulled me into a hug causing my whole body to stiffen momentarily before I too put my arms around her lightly to reciprocate the action.

"I was expecting you, actually. Dr. Cullen had mentioned that your dad said something about you coming back to visit." She said, pulling away and standing there, her eyes giving me the once over like she had all those years ago when I had only just started at Forks High School.

"Dr. Cullen? Carlisle Cullen is still the doctor here?" I had only met Carlisle Cullen a few times, he moved here just before I had moved to Palo Alto to attend Stanford and the city had been so excited, with him he brought his youngest daughter, about a year younger than I was, and I could only faintly remember seeing her around town. She stood out like a sore thumb with her short, pixie haircut. There had been word that he had an older son, adopted who had been off at college studying medicine as well though I had never seen him before.

"No, well yes. He's the chief here now, but his son is the one who has been looking after Charlie, the one who scrubbed in for his surgery." She shrugged, before straightening out her pink scrubs and lowering her voice just a little. "To be honest, if I wasn't with Mike I'd be all over Edward, though he doesn't seem to notice any one around here… But he is gorgeous!" I smiled politely at her, in my head thinking of ways to get out of the conversation and hoping that she couldn't see the discomfort that I was sure was plastered across my face.

"It was really good to see you again Jess but I should go find Emmet and my dad…" I said, interrupting her rant about the 'hot' doctor that was now doing his residency here. I figured I'd meet him soon enough and truth be told, if Jess thought he was hot, I would probably be repulsed by him, considering she was still dating Mike Newton. I shuddered at the thought of his name. True he had been a friend but there had been a short time in high school, well no, for the two years that I had been in high school at Forks, Mike had his infatuation with me, even when he was seeing Jessica.

"Well I'm a nurse here so I'm sure I'll be seeing you around. I see Emmet pretty much every day. At least when I work." She responded and I couldn't help but notice the irritation in her voice, likely caused by my interruption.

I smiled at her words but began to walk away turning the corner, leaving her standing there alone. My feet were probably walking faster than I should have let them because before I knew it I had tripped once again over my own feet, my chin hitting the ground hard. _Leave it to me to injure myself at a hospital._ I could faintly hear people scurrying around me as I stood up, waving my hand dismissively as though to tell them to leave but it wasn't until I felt the warm liquid and smelt the scent of rust and salt that I noticed my chin was bleeding and everything went blank.

**EPOV**

As I was walking down the hall on my way to Charlie Swan's room to speak with Emmet, to meet his sister, I could hear Jessica Stanley, causing me to stop dead in my tracks and scan my surroundings, looking for an alternate route. The last thing I wanted was to run into her and have to listen to her annoying voice, to feel her hand on my arm as she tried to flirt with me, to feel her eyes on my body. What made it even worse was it was common knowledge around Forks that she had been in a relationship with Mike Newton for four years off and on now, had she no self-respect? It was because of girls like her that I hated how easily I could read people, the look on her face always gave away what she was thinking, and granted I realize how self absorbed this sounds, she was usually thinking about her and I, naked. Not that I would ever let that happen, even the thought brought a scowl to my face, my nose cringing in repugnance.

When I heard the hall go silence and the movement of footsteps I peeked around the corner, noticing that Jessica was nowhere to be seen, she had probable made her way to the cafeteria for her lunch break. Still, not wanting to chance it, I quickened my pace, turning just in time to see a young woman on the floor, a small pool of blood beneath her chin, and an audience just watching her as she told them all to back off, that she was fine. Obviously, she had yet to realize that she was losing blood at a more rapid rate than she thought. I moved closer to her, pushing a few nurses out of the way. As she gained her footing I was a few feet away from her and I watched as she pulled her hand away from her chin, her eyes taking in the sight of the blood that was on them.

"Miss are you okay?" I questioned, however, she was falling down before she even had the time to respond. I was just thankful that I was right behind her. I reached my arm out and caught her under her arms before leaning down and picking up her legs so that I was carrying her. As I caught sight of her face I felt weak and after realizing that I had forgotten to breathe I walked quickly to an empty room, propping her on the chair so I could get a better look.

"I need a #2 non absorbent thread, needle, and bandages." I said, turning briefly from the young woman's hypnotizing face to look at the nurse that had followed me into the room. Without a word she disappeared leaving me alone with the girl as I began to clean her chin, the antibacterial liquid opening the wound to my eyes. It wasn't too deep but it was deep enough that it would be best to close it with sutures. I heard her wince, and I almost breathed a sigh of relief but I stopped myself realizing that it wouldn't be professional. As it was, I had to do something fast to get the images that were circulating through my mind out before I began to close the wound, the last thing I needed were distractions and this girl, she was a major distraction.

"What happened?" She asked, her voice weak.

"I didn't see the whole thing, you must have fallen and busted your chin open. When you stood up you fainted, I'm assuming from losing your equilibrium, but I was able to catch you before you fell again." I responded, my eyes looking up to meet her own, only to find that her eyes were still shut tightly. "I just need to suture it up."

I heard her groan, "Great… They are going to have a field day with this one."

The nurse returned a few moments later, the supplies I needed resting on a metal tray that she held for me as I thread the string through the needle and began to very carefully stitch the skin, doing all I could to minimize the scar so to not disturb her perfect skin. Ten minutes later and fifteen very tight stitches I was covering the skin with a white bandage before pushing away from her and standing back up. "I'm sorry but I do have to make up a chart and do your paperwork." That was a lie, and the nurse looked at me curiously, it really would have been her job after all.

"I know… Listen they have a huge file here on me though it's been a few years…" She stood up, her eyes finally opening allowing me to see their deep chocolate pools. "I just really have to get to another room. Whomever it is that needs my information can take it there."

"I'll just need your name."

"Isabella Swan" She responded, my mouth falling open just slightly. "I need to get to Charlie Swan's room. Emmet will be worried that I haven't shown up yet." I was rendered speechless for the first time in many years and I nodded my head, it must have been enough for her because she was out the door and flying down the hall once again, and all I could think about was that I hoped she didn't trip again. Emmet was right, she was a walking disaster and for the first time in my life, I felt a pull to protect her, to make sure that she never hurt herself again.

**A/N: Thanks for reading and I wanted to thank Lady Persephone and Edward Mason Cullen for their reviews (chapter 2 and chapter 1, respectively). I'd also like to thank those who have added this story to their alerts/favorites. I'd love to know what people think. I'm new to writing for Twilight and I could use all the help I could get... I'm curious to know if you think I'm capturing the voices and mannerisms well enough or if you have any suggestions as to how I might improve. I also hope that you enjoyed the new chapter! Thank you again!**


	4. Chapter 4

**Baby You Can Stop Running  
Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight... Though I wish I owned Edward sigh**

**Chapter Four**

**BPOV**

I felt the hard plastic of what was supposed to be a faux leather chair, followed by the familiar sting of antiseptic on an open wound, and I stifled the groan that I so desperately wanted to let out. I blamed Jessica for this, had she not stopped me in the lobby I never would have had to rush and my shoes, wet from the ground outside, never would have lost traction causing me to fall, flat on my face, in front of everyone. _For someone who doesn't like attention, I sure find a way to attract it. Stupid Jessica Stanley. _I felt the wet cotton as it brushed against my chin followed by an intense sting, it must have been where the cut was the deepest, and I could feel my eyes tear up from the pain. I would have thought that by now I would have been use to it, use to the sting, to the pain accompanied by my accidents.

Opening my eye slightly, all I could see was a mess of hair, beautiful bronze hair and I could instantly feel my heart race. _God I hope I'm not hooked up to one of those heart monitors. _His warm hand brushed against my chin as he lifted my head to look at the cut in a different light. This touch sent shivers down my spine; it was a touch unlike any that I had ever felt before and even thinking about it, I began to feel my cheeks grow hot as the blood rushed to them.

"What happened?" I whispered quietly, afraid to break his concentration, afraid that he would look up and notice me, see that my cheeks were red from embarrassment. As much as I wanted to see his face, to see the face that had kept me from falling for the third time that day, but I knew that if I did my body would have some kind of reaction that I wasn't prepared to deal with, besides, hot doctors, they aren't looking for plain girls like myself.

"I didn't see the whole thing; you must have fallen and busted your chin open." His voice sounded like smooth velvet, the way his word rolled off his tongue, it was soothing, sensual and intense, all wrapped up into one, the thought only burned my cheeks more. "When you stood up you fainted, I'm assuming from losing your equilibrium, but I was able to catch you before you fell again. I just need to suture it up." I felt like I could have sat there forever if he had asked me to and I had yet to see his face, strange, I was never like this. Ever since… Well, like I've said that's all ancient history, no use stirring up the memories any more so than they already are.

"Great… They are going to have a field day with this one," I groaned, imagining the look that Emmet would give me as soon as I walked into the room. I could even hear the tone in his voice, 'what's silly Bella gone and done to herself now?' The doctor who was treating my gash was quiet now, presumably because how can you respond to something like that, it's not like I gave him an opening. Though, that was fine, at least it gave me time to gather my thoughts, gather my feelings and figure out just what the heck was happening to me.

I could hear him humming a beautiful tune that I couldn't place and though I wanted to ask what it was I continued to keep still, I didn't want to make this any harder than it already was. I was anxious, anxious to leave the room and see Emmet and Charlie. There were so many things that Emmet had yet to tell me about Charlie and I was concerned about his condition, concerned that I would be too late. Had I not been being stitched up I knew I would have been much more fidgety than I already was, every so often slipping a soft whisper of an 'I'm sorry' when I shifted my body weight. I know that it didn't take that long, ten minutes at the most before I felt the thick bandage taped on and the velvety voice speak once again.

"I'm sorry but I do have to make up a chart and do your paperwork." I couldn't remember than in typical hospital protocol and I couldn't fight the urge to open my eyes as I jumped from the table and in doing so I realized that I stood before the most beautiful man that I had ever seen in my twenty-two years of existence. As an art history major, I had learned the proportions of a perfect face, and his face paled in comparison to what I had thought it would look like upon witnessing it. It was inhuman to be so beautiful. His nose, perfect in its narrow structure, high cheek bones, a perfectly chiseled square jaw, his green eyes, spaced just right, and his hair, the messiest part of his features had to be his hair, and yet, even that was perfect, somehow in its imperfection it was exactly the way it should have been, something that gave his angel before me a human quality.

"I know… Listen they have a huge file here on me though it's been a few years…I just really have to get to another room. Whomever it is that needs my information can take it there." My voice cracked slightly as I tried to maintain my breathing, tried hard to imagine anything but this man in front of me whose eyes seemed to bore into my soul.

"I'll just need your name."

"Isabella Swan." I replied, moving quickly to the door, desperately doing all I could to get out of there fast enough, my hand was on the door knob when I turned around once more, realizing that I had left out a critical piece of information if he, or any of the nurses who would write the chart had been planning on locating me. ". "I need to get to Charlie Swan's room. Emmet will be worried that I haven't shown up yet."

I left the doctor standing there, not bothering to see if he would even reply, my heart was crushing against my chest, how could I possibly feel a connection that strong with someone I barely knew? Schoolgirl crush, that had to be it, the only logical explanation, it had been so long since I had even noticed anyone of the opposite sex so it just made sense, eventually my body would react to one, especially one as good looking at he was. I shook the thought from my mind as I reached Charlie's door and tried hard to compose myself. What would I see when I entered the room? How bad would it be? Would he really not push through?

Losing Charlie was something I never wanted, something that I was afraid of and something I wasn't prepared for. For so many years he had been my rock, my one steady in a world that seemed to be changing so rapidly before me. Which was why, when I left for California, I felt that I had betrayed him, that I had left him alone to rot in the small town. The quilt was only added to when I decided that disappearing was the best option, granted it wasn't a full removal from my past life, I did still have contact with Emmet who, if he told me the truth, frequently updated him on my whereabouts, my accomplishments and what not. I just thought it would be easier that way, I wasn't sure he would ever look at me the same as he once had if he had known the truth, the truth behind what I was hoping to leave behind in leaving Forks. But now, everything was so screwed up and I only realized that in trying to not hurt anyone, I hurt the one person who I knew, never would have abandoned me, who would have been there even in the mist of the ordeal, who would have looked beyond everything and loved me unconditionally. Now, I was afraid that I had messed it all up, that I had rejected him and in doing so he had shut me entirely out of his world.

I walked in, the door, like all the others in the hospital was propped open, it made it easier when the doctors had to come in, no need to formally ask for permission, not to mention if something went wrong they would know right away. Charlie was asleep on the bed, and I was flooded with a wave of distress; he looked so fragile, so breakable, my strong father looked like I could snap him in half if I tried. Emmet was lounging in a chair, his head hanging to his chest, he must have dozed off while waiting for me, and I placed my hand on his shoulder, watching as he thrust his head back up, supporting it with his strong neck.

"Bells what happened?" He smiled, acting as though he had never been asleep, his eyes falling on the bandage.

"Stupid Jessica Stanley…" I muttered, ignoring the curious glance that he gave me. "My shoes were wet and I was in a hurry to get here and my feet kind of slipped out from under me."

He chuckled softly, not wanting to wake our sleeping father. "How many stitches this time?"

"Fifteen." I grumbled collapsing into the chair next to him. "How long has he been sleeping?"

Emmet glanced at the clock, "About an hour… He'll wake up again soon, about twenty minutes before lunch. He's got his body regulated to it already. He would have passed out sooner but he was trying to stay awake because he knew you were coming."

"He probably thought I changed my mind." I sighed, the never ending guilt was something that would never go away. I hated that I hurt him so badly, that I could cause that much pain.

Emmet just shrugged, there was nothing he could say to reassure me and that meant there was no point in arguing with me. "Rose should be here soon."

The Emmet's mention of Rosalie perked me up slightly. The woman had singlehandedly changed the course of my brother's life and I had yet to even met her. Granted, that was my problem really, I was the one who had exiled myself. Still, I had a desire to know her. I had seen pictures and even I had to admit I had never seen anyone as beautiful as she was, well, the doctor this morning was pretty much on par with her but he was a he… She was the most beautiful woman that I had ever seen; it was as if she had stepped off the pages of a fashion magazine. Emmet adored her, it was obvious, in the pictures of the two of them that he had sent my way, he always starred at her with a love in his eyes that I had never known before, such adoration for a single person, it blew my mind.

"So you let her drive from the airport but you have to pick me up?" My voice was filled with slight indignation. I sometimes resented the leash that he kept me on.

"SHE isn't accident prone like you are. I don't have to worry about her driving off the side of the road trying to swerve to hit a squirrel that just happens to run out in front of her." I sighed my resignation, there was no point in arguing, I didn't really have stellar luck, there was no denying that.

"When did her flight get in?"

"Around ten I think." He pulled his phone and checked his call log. "Yeah, ten."

"I'm looking forward to meeting her, to see the girl who changed my brother's playboy ways." He laughed at that. Just as he liked to tease me about my constant accidents and frequent blushing, I chose to tease him about his womanizing ways, well, what used to be his womanizing ways, I suppose I'll have to find something else now. As much as I'd love to make fun of his sex life, I knew that as soon as I mentioned sex my cheeks would flush, only giving him more of an opening to ridicule me.

"Please don't tell her about those days…" He said softly, his eyes looking towards the bed as Charlie stirred slightly, though his breathing slowed once again as he found sleep.

"You mean to tell me that Rosalie is unaware of your past extracurricular activities with the ladies of U Dub?" My mouth was open in mock surprise, and I felt the pillow that he smacked me lightly with.

"Seriously Bells… This girl is different." He was serious, and his eyes pleaded with me and in so many ways it warmed my cold heart. I was pretty much anti relationship right now, never having found my own happy ending with the men that I allowed into my life, but seeing Emmet, seeing the look in his eyes, the abject fear that I would let something slip that would break this girlfriends heart made my insides tingle. It was a side of him that I wasn't sure I would ever see in my life, a side of him that I was happy to be able to see, a side that somewhat gave me hope that I might someday find my happy ending. My thoughts shifted to the doctor and my cheeks flushed once again.

"I promise." I replied, covering my face with my hands, not wanting him to see, not wanting to be the butt of another joke today. "I thought the doctor was going to come and talk to you."

"Oh, no… He probably went home now; I went straight to his office before I came to dad's room. Though I expect he'll be back later this afternoon to check on him, even if it is his weekend off."

"You seem to know the guy pretty well."

"Yeah well… I don't know, he's always around when I need to talk and he seems to listen which is kind of nice once in a while. Plus, he's been with dad since the beginning and he's really followed through with his medical care, I feel like I owe the guy more than I could ever give him. Carlisle's been great too, but his son is really a miracle worker, I can see why he wanted him to move over here so badly, most of the doctors here don't know a foot from a hand."

"I'm sorry I wasn't here sooner."

"Don't worry about it Bells…" He sighed, I knew that we were heading straight towards a talk that I wasn't even sure I was ready for, wasn't sure I wanted to have in this room, with Charlie able to wake up at any moment and hear it. "I just… I guess I don't really understand why you had to cut off all contact, why you never… I mean, I get why you didn't want to come back, hell, I wouldn't have wanted to come back… But dad… He was always there for us, for you, and…"

"I know…" I whispered, hanging my head. "I know what I did was wrong, I just thought that if he knew the truth, if I ever let it slip that he would kill me, or Jacob, or lose the best friend that he ever really knew around here… You know as well as I do that he would never speak to Bill again… It just seemed like the only option. I mean, for so long I was just too wrapped up in what was happening to me that he would know, he would have known if he had talked to me…"

"But you took care of it, you seemed to have moved on and yet you wanted nothing to do with anything here…"

"It's the memories Em… This town is ripe with memories that all I want to do is forget, even Char… Dad is ripe with them… Even you a little."

"I know it was hard Bella, I'm not saying that it was easy for you… But maybe it would have been easier if you had your family around, if you let us help you through it."

"Maybe…" I said softly but I silenced myself when I heard Charlie's breathing quicken again, he was awake…

**EPOV**

I didn't chase after the brunette beauty who had raced from the room. I didn't even go to Charlie's room like I had told Emmet that I would, no, I couldn't see her looking as I did, a forty-eight hour shift meant that I was just a little rough around the edges, well, more than a little. I probably would have run away from me too. Still, as I got into my Volvo, I couldn't seem to get her out of my mind. This had been the girl that Emmet and Charlie had gone on and on about, for some reason she wasn't what I had been expecting.

If I was being honest with myself, I would have been expecting someone tall, much taller than what I assumed to be her five foot, three, maybe four inch frame; I imagined her to be muscular and instead she was slender, not a hint of athleticism about her. She was stunning, in a way that most women were not, and what made it even more appealing, she was completely unaware of her beauty, completely unaware that a glance from her had literally taken my breath away.

I sped down the quiet streets, barely taking notice of the few people in town walking around, presumably on their way to lunch. I wanted to go back; I wanted her to see me at my fullest potential, that required a shower and clean clothes. Esme's car was parked in the driveway and I took notice that Alice and Jasper were around as well, though as I turned the ignition off, I didn't really even think about stopping to talk to them. I wasn't sure how long they were going to be at the hospital so I wasn't sure how long my window of opportunity would be.

"Edward!" Esme's voice called out, stopping me halfway to the stairs to my bedroom. "Something's different…" She commented and I raised my eyebrows at her. "You met someone!"

"No." I spouted, it was true, sort of, after all I really hadn't met Bella in the way that I was hoping to met her this afternoon, if I could ever get out of this house, if they would stop bombarding me with questions and let me get to it, she could celebrate later, when I brought Bella over as my girlfriend… Hmm, might be jumping the gun there a little, she might want nothing to do with me, then again, I was a patient man, I could wait.

"Really?"

"Really what?" My youngest sister, because even though I was adopted I still thought of her like a sister, still treated her like a sister, asked walking in. I looked at her momentarily, trying hard not to laugh as I took in her outfit. I wasn't sure why she bothered with the outfits that she wore here, no one else wore five inch heels. It was rather out of place, and quite unnecessary, but if anyone tried to take them away from her, she through a fit like none other and no one wanted to deal with it after the first time that they tried.

"I think Edward met a girl." She smiled her warm smile. Esme was a natural at being a mom, and although I missed my own parents, her presence did help, there was no denying that. She took me in, no questions asked and treated me like one of her own, had I not lived ten years under the house of my dead parents, I never would have guessed that I had been adopted.

"I did not." I insisted, feeling the buzz of my cell phone in my pocket.

"Oh! Who is she?" Alice grinned. "Please don't tell me you let Jessica Stanley finally sink her claws into you… I might have to wash you in anti-bacterial when you get home from going out with her. That girl is vile." I stifled the laugh, and shook my head before reaching into my pocket and pulling my cell phone out.

"Hello?" I asked unsure as to who was calling, they had distracted me from looking at the LCD screen and I had failed to notice who had called. "Emmet, I'm sorry I didn't stop by before I left, I meant to but I was side tracked." _That was putting it lightly_. "Is Charlie okay?" I listened as Emmet described his condition, that he had spiked a small fever and was sleeping more than was usual. "I can stop by this afternoon if you like, I'm sure the sleeping is just his body trying to recover, the more he sleeps the better off he might be in the end, it allows his body to rest so he can fight the infections." I could hear the concern in Emmet's voice and it made me slightly uncomfortable, especially as he told me not to worry about it, that he was just being overly cautious, something that he attributed to Bella's constant questioning. "I can stop by and explain things to her…" I desperately hoped that he would say yes but he didn't, he told me to enjoy my weekend and I sighed slightly, not realizing how audible it was because he had invited me over for dinner a few moments after. "Oh, I wouldn't want to impose." I could feel myself grinning; I could see my dream girl once again. "Let me bring something then please. I feel like a shit just showing up empty handed." He insisted that I needn't bring anything and that I should be there around seven, it would give him plenty of time to clean up after leaving the hospital and for dinner to be prepared. "Are you sure?" I asked once again and he insisted that it was. "I'll be over later then." We said our goodbyes and I ended the call, looking up to see Esme and Alice's eyes staring straight at me.

"Who was that?" Alice grinned.

"Emmet, Officer Swan's son, apparently he was just worried and his youngest sister is back in town and was concerned." I replied, realizing then that the grin had not left my face. "I didn't have time to stop by and introduce myself and fill her in on the details, and she has been worrying him."

"The infamous Bella Swan is back?" Alice commented.

"I suppose… I've never met her." I lied.

"I use to see her around school when we had moved here." My heart raced when Alice said that, maybe I could find something out about her, yet I didn't want to appear too eager, I didn't want to give anything away, like the fact that I was falling head over heels for her.

"Oh…" I replied as nonchalantly as possible. "Was she in your class?" Alice narrowed her eyes as she looked at me, and I shook my head, a wordless expression telling her not to read too deeply into my questioning.

"No, she was a year older than me, popular though she never seemed to like that title, or that role. She mainly hung our around Angela Webber, though she was grouped together with Jessica Stanley, Lauren Mallory, Mike Newton and that lot…" I watched her shiver as she said their names; I knew she hated them as much as I did. "I think she even dated Jacob Black before she went to Stanford."

"What was she like?" I realized that my probing was going to get suspicious but I still wanted to know as much about her as I could before seeing her again. I felt a pang of jealousy as Alice mentioned Jacob Black's name and how Bella had dated him. I barely knew her and here I was, jealous? I needed to get a grip on myself.

"Quiet… Always did her work, she was probably one of the smartest girls in that grade… Though she was always pretty clumsy, tripping over her own two feet. The boys all liked her, Mike Newton even tried a few times to get with her, Tyler too, though she seemed to never pay any attention to them, then again, she had Jacob… She was defiantly pretty, though she never seemed aware of it, her sense of style was lacking, I always wanted to get my hands on her, give her a makeover though that probably would have scared her senseless. All I know is after she went to Stanford she dropped off the map, I guess that's why it took me by surprise that you said she was back. Why are you so curious anyway?" She lifted her eyebrow at me and I noticed that Esme looked on with curiosity.

"I'm just curious is all… I'm meeting her tonight and I have to explain what is happening with her father… Just wanted to get a little background information."

"Sure…" She grinned before turning her back on me and leaving the room.

"Well… I guess I'm going to go lay down before I head out tonight. I'm pretty tired."

"Okay sweetheart. I'm under the assumption you won't be joining us for dinner?" I shook my head as she placed a motherly kiss on my cheek. "Just say goodbye before you leave. I know you're old enough to go off without telling me but I just worry is all."

"I know." I smiled before turning and walking up the stairs and heading to my room, hoping that I would find a few hours of sleep. It seemed impossible though; my mind was too excited about the prospect of tonight and what might come from introducing myself to the girl who seemed to shake up my entire life in only a few minutes.

**A/N: Just wanted to thank everyone who is reading and adding this story to your alerts/favorites, a special thanks to: Lady Persephone, Molly Cullen, TwilightLover12Edward, and rainpuddle13 for your reviews, I really appreciate you taking the time to let me know what you think! I'm already working on Chapter Five and it will have Bella's talk with Charlie, as well as Edward and Bella meeting for the second time, Rose will make her first appearance as well! So please continue to send me your thoughts! When I hear that people like what they are reading I tend to be a much better updater because I know people are looking foward to reading more! So don't be shy! **


	5. Chapter 5

**Baby You Can Stop Running**

**Chapter Five**

**BPOV**

After spending the past four years in a place that rarely ever rained, the dark clouds were ominous to me. California had been a breath of fresh air and the perfect place to run away to. Washington rarely had the sun that my body was desperate for, instead, it always seemed to be covered with a layer of mist and dark clouds that only added to the misery that I had been feeling when I left. California on the other hand brought out a whole knew me. It had been everything I needed at the time, but now, I regretted it more than anything else in the world. Still, I couldn't help but think, as my eyes glanced out the window before looking back towards Charlie who was stirring on his hospital bed, that the clouds were telling me that things weren't okay, that trouble was just around the corner and there was no way to prepare myself for it.

"Bella?" I heard his weak voice call out as his eyes fluttered open. His eyes searched the room until they landed on me, in that instant I seemed to feel insecure, all too much aware of the pain that I had caused him as his eyes seemed to see straight through me, it was as though he was looking at a ghost. It made sense, for him to look at me that way, to look through me, he was sick, injured to the point where apparently the doctor wasn't even sure he was going to make it through, maybe he thought I was merely a figment of his imagination. I'm sure that I probably would have felt the same way. Still, I knew that there were so many things that had been left unsaid between us. They were things that I knew I had to come clean about and I was worried, worried that what I had to tell him was only going to make this worse, that it would throw his recovery to the point where he had absolutely no chance of pulling through. But even more prevalent in my thoughts was my fear that he might die never knowing the truth.

I stood up, watching as Charlie adjusted himself on the bed and I could feel my heart crushing against my chest, had it not been contained neatly within my body I was sure it would have leaped out. I opened my mouth to speak but no words came out, I couldn't seem to find them, I didn't know what he wanted to hear, what I was willing to let him hear. Emmett was silent, not even a simple 'hey dad' came from his lips, and all that could really be heard was the ticking of the clock that hung on the wall, a simple reminder that time was passing, and quickly at that.

"Bella?" He whispered again and I turned my heat to look at Emmett who only nodded me forward, his subliminal way of holding my hand though the process. "Bella is that you?" _Who else would it be?_ I instantly felt guilty for that thought; he was probably so doped up on painkillers that he truly could have believed he was imagining my presence.

"Hi dad." I said softly as I finally reached the side of his bed. Looking at him at such a close distance, I wanted to cry. He looked so weak and it was something that I had never seen in him before. He had always been strong, always been the one that I had leaned on for support and seeing him like this, it was something I was totally and completely unprepared for. He reached for my hand and I gave it to him freely, sitting down on the edge of the bed, careful not to touch him, afraid that I would break him.

"Bells…" He whispered, his other hand reaching up and touching my face as though he was making sure that I was real. I could feel the tears as the pooled in my eyes, the salty liquid starting to brim over my eyes and I was unable to blink them back again. His thumb brushed my cheek, wiping away a few of the tears that had escaped as he looked at me with gentle eyes. "Why are you crying?" He seemed truly unaware to my feelings, and it only made me cry harder, he had gone all this time thinking that I had left because of him, in his mind, I was just like Renee, maybe worse so because she was not his own flesh and blood.

"I just…" I couldn't seem to breathe and the sobbing only became more intense. For the first time in years, I was finally crying. I had spent so many years building a wall, a dam maybe might be a better metaphor, and while I was building it, there were cracks in the cement and all that pressure just kept pushing against it until now. Now, everything was crumbling, the water had pushed through for the first time, and it was exploding at an alarming rate. I finally managed to control my breathing and in that moment I turned to look at Charlie once again though my cloudy, tear filled eyes. "I never should have done what I did… I never should have left you and Emmett… I'm sorry, so sorry…"

"You're back… That's all that matters." Charlie was never one for emotional reunions, though I was surprised he was handling my tears so well. I guess that was one of the perks to him actually being in the hospital for this, at least he could see, could really see the regret that I felt, and he wasn't shying away from my tears as he had in the past.

"There is so much though… So much that you don't know about…"

"Why don't we keep it on a need to know basis?" He chuckled lightly, leave it to Charlie to make light of a situation when feelings were involved, maybe he wasn't as evolved as I thought he was. "What matters is that you're here." His eyes shifted across the room towards Emmett who was sitting there, gazing out the window trying to give us the time alone that he thought we needed. "Thank you Em." Emmett just looked at him a shrugged, preferring to use his body as a way of speaking than his actual mouth.

"Are you hungry?" I managed to choke out, pulling his tray closer to him. There were things that he had to know, that were on a need to know basis but maybe this wasn't the time. I needed more time, more time to figure out how I was going to talk to him, how I was going to tell him, it wasn't something I knew I could do lightly, it was serious, and I just wasn't ready yet, there was still someone I had to talk to. I still needed closure and I couldn't help but wonder how long it would take for him to come around, for him to gather the courage and come see me.

"I'm okay… You look tired though kid… Have you gotten any sleep at all? And what's that on your chin?"

I stood up and pushed the tray closer to him so that he could eat before responding to his question. "Emmett called me around two in the morning and I got on the first flight to Seattle… I had a small nap before coming over here. As for the chin, my shoes were wet and I was rushing to get here and well, my feet slipped out from underneath me and I kind of went chin first onto the hospital floor."

I could hear Charlie chuckle lightly, wincing every so often when it began to hurt. "Oh Bells… Leave it to you to have to be treated in the hospital not even four hours after coming back." I rolled my eyes but when I heard Emmett's laugh bellow though the small room I too couldn't help but laugh. "Some things never change." Charlie smiled pulling my head down and kissing my forehead. "I've missed you Bella, but go home and get some rest. We can talk tomorrow, we have all the time in the world. If you promise not to leave again."

"Are you sure dad? You just woke up…" My voice trailed as I stood up and he nodded. I didn't want him to over exert himself so I turned to Emmett. "Is there food in the house? I heard you invite someone over for dinner and Rosalie is coming so if I need to go to the store I want to do it on my way home."

"Honestly… There isn't much."

"Okay, I don't mind stopping to get things then. I'll stock up." I smiled before leaning down and kissing Charlie on the cheek. "I'll be back tomorrow morning."

I heard Charlie say goodbye as I walked over towards the chair that I had been sitting on and picked my purse up, flinging it over my shoulder before taking one look back to the bed and walking out the door. Maybe Charlie was right, maybe we did have all the time in the world to talk, it just didn't feel that way. I knew it was the best thing, to leave when I did, I just couldn't help but fear that he wouldn't be around in the morning, but at the same time, I still didn't know how I was going to tell him the things that I knew I had to. I hadn't even spoken with Jacob, something I thought I would have to do first, now I just wasn't so sure.

I walked to the truck, not bothering to care that the mist was sticking to my forehead, to my hair, to my clothes. I suppose I should have, especially since I knew I needed coffee and that required going to the only coffee shop in Forks, Forks Coffee Shop. There was one perk of small towns, everything was close and it wasn't even five minutes later that I found myself walking into the shop. Nothing changed, and that shouldn't have surprised me, so why was it that every place I went I seemed to comment how not one thing had been moved? How everything was exactly the way it was when I left four years ago? It just didn't seem possible, the natural evolution of life had taught me that things in nature adjusted, adapted to the changing times, but Forks just didn't. It always maintained its small town 'charm' which I found somewhat unnerving.

As I took a sip of the black coffee, a taste that I had developed from long nights of memorizing art slides, I couldn't help but wish that it was slightly stronger… And by stronger I meant alcoholic. I could have blamed it on the pain from the cut that was on my chin but that would have been a lie. I was just thankful that I didn't run into anyone while I was grabbing coffee, though the chances of seeing someone while I was out Forks Outfitters was probably almost a certainty, with one grocery store in the entire town, someone was going to be there, or at least, working there.

"You're Bella Swan right?" I heard someone call my name as I was about to walk towards the door. I had finally just finished putting the right about of cream and sugar into it, to actually make it a little more drinkable. For a state that prides itself on coffee, I was slightly surprised that this wasn't what I was use to, then again, the town wasn't riddled with Starbucks locations like in Seattle or San Francisco, I mentally chided myself for not making Emmett stop at one before we made the drive to Forks.

As I turned around, I found myself looking at a girl who couldn't have been much younger than myself. She was exotic looking almost and I slightly remembered her as being new to town when I had left. I think she had attended Forks, but I was apprehensive to say anything, although the town did change, the people do grow up and the last thing I wanted was to offend someone by not remembering their name. Still, there weren't many people around Forks with short hair like hers was, and the cut was messy, almost that same perfection that graced my hot doctor. She wasn't built like him though, she was petite, maybe thin to an extreme but on her it didn't look unhealthy, and she was short too, very short, maybe under five feet short, but she had a smile about as wide was the Olympic Mountain range and she seemed friendly enough. And mentally I found myself wishing that I had known more people like her, and here I didn't really even know who she was.

"Sorry, you probably don't remember me, I only moved to Forks the year before you graduated." She explained, her bubbly voice bringing some cheer to the misery caused from the chill and rain waiting just for me beyond the glass doors. "I'm Alice Cullen, and this," She motioned to the very tall, honey blonde male who stood behind her, his hand resting protectively on her waist, "is Jasper Whitlock."

He reached his free hand forward to shake my own, "Hello." His southern drawl filled my ears and had I not heard the voice of the doctor, I would have never thought anything could have sounded more beautiful. It was fitting for him, and it didn't seem to surprise me that he was Southern, something about him screamed gentleman.

"Your brother is my father's doctor?" It sounded more like a question then it did a statement and she just beamed her radiant smile my way and nodded her head.

"I'm really sorry to hear about your father but I know Edward is doing all he can to make sure that your father pulls through. I'm sure this has to be a difficult time for you." She smiled, her voice sincere and I appreciated her sympathy. Jasper just stood there and though I thought he was on the gentleman side of things, I couldn't help but worry that he might be cold, that he didn't want to be there. Granted, neither did I really.

"Thank you. I haven't meet your brother yet but I hope to see him at the hospital tomorrow. I have a few questions that I wanted to ask him about Char… my dad that Emmett can't seem to tell me. But I've already worried him enough as it is so I'm trying to not be too pushy about my probing."

"Did you just come from the hospital?" She questioned and I nodded.

"I did, but he wanted to get some more rest and Emmett and Charlie were never really good at keeping the house stocked with food so I figured it would be a good time to run the errands that they haven't done in a long time I'm assuming."

"Well I hope to see you around Bella Swan." She smiled and I found that I had hoped that would be true as well. Besides Angela, there weren't very many people in this town that I actually liked and not knowing how long I was going to be here, it would be nice to have a friend around, especially since Angela was going to be busy planning her wedding to Ben.

"I do too." I smiled politely, taking my coffee and heading towards the door. I paused for a moment because I thought that I heard her say something to Jasper, however I chalked that up to my own imagination. I barely knew her and I knew even less about Edward, she couldn't possibly have thought that I was going to be good for her brother.

An hour later I was struggling to carry the grocery bags into the house and I knew that I had about five trips to make since I was alone which was why when I finally got the door open I almost screamed when I saw the figure of another person sitting on the couch. It wasn't until I flicked the light on that I realized that she must have been Emmett's infamous Rosalie. As she stood up I realized what it was that Emmett found so appealing about her, hell, even I thought she was beautiful. She was tall, much taller than I was, and her blonde hair fell in soft waves to her back and as she came closer to me, I caught a glimpse of her eyes, violet eyes like ones I had never seen before.

"Bella right?" She asked, her voice almost like a song as it echoed through the small house.

I smiled and placed the bags down, and to my surprised she pulled me into a hug. After the way Emmett had described her I had not been expect that, in fact, I had almost been expecting her to be rather wary of me, but her warmness overwhelmed me. It had been a day unlike what I had imagined, between Charlie's reaction, meeting Alice Cullen and her sincere compassion, and now Rosalie's warm welcoming, I wasn't sure I deserved this. I would have been much more comfortable had I not had such a warm welcoming, now I just felt like shit for putting everyone though this.

"Emmett has told me all about you, he was so excited when he called and said that you were coming home. And I stopped by the hospital and Charlie has improved tenfold since you've been back!" Her voice was excited and I felt somewhat awkward for a moment but I pulled away and plastered as wide of a smile that I possibly could to hide the feelings that were flooding my body.

"I just wish I had come home sooner." I replied watching as she followed me out to the tuck and proceeded to help me carry in the groceries. "I am just glad that I have finally gotten to meet you! You are all Emmett talks about! I wish we could have met sooner!"

"Well we have plenty of time now to get to know one another." She smiled before walking over to the door and picking up her purse. "I am going to go home for a bit, Emmett told me that you might have a lot of groceries and with your accident he asked if I could help."

"You didn't have to do that."

"Nonsense, I wanted to. Tell Emmett that I'll be back later for dinner." She said as she opened the door and walked out after I shouted my goodbye.

As I began to put things away I couldn't help but think that she and I were going to get along well. And in meeting her I could see why Emmett had fallen for her, she had been everything that I always knew he was looking for. She was, without a doubt, beautiful but it was more than that, she was sweet, seemed humble, and appeared to adore him, which made me rather proud. I may never be able to pull anyone as good looking as that but at least my brother could, that in and of itself was enough to make me smile.

_Seven O'clock_

The doorbell rang and though I shouted at Emmett to answer it I noticed that he was occupied on the couch with Rosalie which caused me to sigh. Although I was happy they had found each other, I had been hoping that they might have been able to keep their passion under control around my presence although that didn't seem to be the case. As I walked behind the couch I slapped him on the back of the head causing him to look up and grin with self satisfaction and I shot him a dirty look in return but my cheeks had flushed and I know that he had noticed it.

"God Bells, you're a grown woman, people do have sex, stop being such a prude!" I glared at him before opening the door, only to hear the light chuckling of the person who was standing there.

"Hi, I'm Edward." He said as I turned to look at him, my mouth falling open. This was not what I was expecting, this was not the night that I had signed up for at all. If I had thought he was attractive at the hospital, I was sorely mistaken because the man standing in front of me was more like a god, a real life Adonis. And then he did the unthinkable, and I knew I was in trouble. I watched as the left side of his lip curled up into a crooked half smile and I felt as though my knees were going to buckle underneath me and for the first time in my life, I was thankful that I was holding onto the door. I had never in my entire life met anyone more dazzling and I knew, more than ever, that I was in danger of falling for someone who would never think twice about me.

**A/N: Wow! Thank you for everyone who has been adding this story to their alerts! I was surprised with the amount of them that came in with the previous chapter! And again, a really quick thanks to those who took the time to review my story! I am so appreciative of it!  
Twilightlover12Edward  
Tweemad  
Twilightmoon20: Thanks for pointing out the misspellings of the names! I fixed it in this chapter!  
Rainpuddle12  
Darcy13  
MeghanCullen  
a step into the Light**

**Thank you again for the reviews! I'm looking forward to hearing what you have to say about the next chapter. I wanted to add more Edward/Bella interaction in this chapter but I didn't want it to be too long so I thought it was best to stop here… I've started chapter six though so I will post that as soon as I have finished with it but I'm hoping that you like it as will be mainly in Edwards point of view and his impressions… We will also be learning more about what Bella has been running away from and what is happening in Edward's mind that has made him so secluded. Please continue to send me your thoughts, I love hearing what you say and it really makes me excited to keep writing and posting! **


	6. Chapter 6

**Baby You Can Stop Running**

**Chapter Six**

**EPOV**

What exactly defines a tragedy? Is it merely through the works of timeless authors and playwrights such as William Shakespeare and Thomas Hardy? Though Shakespeare often divided his time between the comedies and the tragedies, if I can recall back to my undergrad study of Hardy, an English class I needed to fulfill my graduation requirements, he seemed to devote his life to the writings of the misery of the modern man or, in the case of Tess, woman. Still, I remember seeking some kind of refuge in them, finding them intriguing, worthy of my time, and in so many cases, a reference in plotting my own tragic demise.

Any outsider would have wondered what was so terrible about my life, why I was so miserable. To anyone who merely looked in, my life seemed almost perfect; I had the love of a mother and father who were more than well off, a younger sister who I adored and more importantly, adored me, a solid education and a degree in medicine, and a great job at a hospital that had little more than a few accidents a month which allowed me to continue to study other things that interested me. However, what they didn't know was my past, the past that had been following me for seventeen years, and the one that I wished, more than anything else, that I could forget.

Most people don't remember my parents, but their death was the biggest tragedy of my existence. My dad was one of Chicago's most prominent surgeons, I guess it was one of the reasons that I took to studying medicine myself, I thought that it would bring me closer to him, make me more like him and keep me from forgetting him. My mom on the other hand was a budding politician, something that still wasn't fully appreciated by modern society at the time, but still, she had a bright future ahead of her, and if what Carlisle and Esme had told me was the truth, she eventually would have made it to the White House. Still, someone didn't like her in her position of authority and what I didn't learn until I was old enough to read the papers and process the information was that their car accident on that cold June night, wasn't an accident.

I spent all three years of my undergrad college career (summer school allowed me to shave a whole year off my graduation timeline), at Dartmouth nonetheless, plotting my revenge. The man who hunted down and killed my parents had been found, though the court had considered him weak of mind, criminally insane and had tossed him not into the penitentiary but rather into an asylum where they hoped to treat him. I knew better, the man was faking it, unwilling to spend the rest of his life behind bars, he believed, along with his lawyers that faking insanity would at least provide him some semblance of freedom. Still, it was something that I couldn't buy and when the time came for his release (the asylum claimed that he was cured, no longer a harm to himself or those around him) I pleaded with the court to throw him into the pen, to enforce the maximum punishment; the taking of his life as punishment for taking away the childhood that I was now void of. The court sided with me and he was sentenced to death, my revenge was on the horizon, and at twilight, on June 10, 2004, James Anderson was killed by means of lethal injection.

I thought it would make me feel better; then again, you don't always get what you want. His death brought no closure, and instead, I threw myself into my studies, graduating at the top of my class at Harvard before taking my internship in New York. The more I realized my motivations, the angrier with myself I grew, in my attempts for closure, I had become a monster, unworthy of my life and love that the people in it gave me. I suppose that was the ultimate decision in my becoming a doctor, it was no longer about being close to my father, about remembering my parents, about following in Carlisle's footsteps, it was about my redemption, stopping others from losing their lives to make up for the life that I insisted the criminal system take.

So when my eyes fell upon her, when I caught her in my arms, it took me by surprise that such a small, innocent girl would make me feel things that I had closed myself off to so long ago. Monsters, in my opinion, didn't deserve to be loved, and surely god would never have made anyone for them, they deserved to walk the earth alone before descending into hell. Still, she made my heart flutter like it never had before and it startled me, scared me, and at the same time, intrigued me. Surely though, she would have seen through me, seen the evil that lurked deep within my eyes, deep within my soul.

I lay on my bed trying to find sleep; I had about two hours if I wanted to clean up before heading to the Swan's house in town. Still, each time I closed my eyes she was there, the image of her face, her perfect, heart-shaped face, staring at me in abject horror, a look that seemed to make me recoil and cringe, it was a look that wasn't meant to be seen on the face of an angel. Still, even though I knew I didn't deserve her, maybe I could find salvation in her, maybe she was the one scent to me to fix me, to make me whole again, to absolve me of my sins and make me into the person that I was meant to be. Just looking at her made me want to be a better person, I only hoped that she wouldn't turn me away.

There was a knock on my door and before I had the chance to respond, Alice danced through it, throwing herself on my bed, bumping me in the process causing me to groan with annoyance. "I saw your mystery girl in town today." Not wanting to give anything away I only looked at her curiously, as though I had absolutely no idea what she was getting at, what she was saying. "Bella Swan. Jazz and I ran into her at the coffee shop a few hours ago."

As I pulled myself up so I was no longer laying but rather sitting, I contemplated my options. Keeping things from Alice was something I never did but I also knew that if I told her about the feelings that I was experiencing for the young woman that I had barely even met that the next thing I knew Esme and Carlisle would know and the magic of what I was feeling would now be more of a burden. I knew how desperately Esme was for me to settle down, to find the one person that I could love. Could I love Bella Swan? Yes, without a doubt, but that wasn't the question, the question was whether Bella Swan could love me.

"I have no idea what you're talking about Alice." I grumbled, though I was certain that she did. She knew me better than most, though that was mainly because I had always been her brother, she had only been four when I moved in with the Cullen's and I was always her protector. She knew me as well, if not better, than I knew her.

"Why are you so stubborn? You've practically lived like a monk for the past four years, buck up." She teased, only getting a scowl of a response from me. "Okay, maybe not entirely like a monk, I know you haven't been celibate but it's not like you've really let anyone into your life."

"Alice…" I groaned, pushing her off the bed, an easy feat in and of itself but she was quick and before I knew it she was back on the bed. For someone who was twenty-one, she definitely had her moments when she acted not much older than a twelve year old, usually when she wanted her way, but this was one thing that I was not going to budge on. "Leave me alone, I worked a forty-eight hour shift and I'm exhausted."

"Just admit I'm right."

"I can't do that because there is nothing for you to be right about."

"Then I'm not leaving until you stop lying to yourself."

"I'll pick you up and carry you out of here myself." I warned. "I'll tell Jazz to take you away from here and we both know that a decade of friendship trumps a four year romance."

"That's what you think." She grinned causing me to grimace again, Jazz was totally and completely whipped by my twenty-one year old sister. "Jazz would never cross me like that. He may have been your friend first big brother, but my prowess is what keeps him on my side."

"Ugh…" I groaned. "I don't want to hear the details of my little sister's sex life with my oldest friend."

She just grinned and shrugged her shoulders. "Ready to submit?"

"No. I have nothing to tell you. You are making this all up in your head."

"If you think I'm going to let this go you're wrong. Besides, I like her a lot and I want to be friends with her so when can I start?"

"I wouldn't count on anything Alice, she's only here because of her dad, she'll leave as soon as that situation is settled." I felt my face fall as I spoke that. It had been an epiphany; what merely started out as something to keep Alice from her until I knew what I was going to do, turned out to be a statement of the future. She had been running from Forks and had only returned because of her father, what would stop her from going back to California? She did, after all, have a life there.

"I don't think that she is going to leave this time around." She stated with certainty causing me to shake my head.

"What makes you so certain?"

"Because she will be too much in love with you to leave." I didn't mean to but Alice's words brought a smile to my face, and in that instant I forced a frown but it was too late, Alice had already gotten the answer she had been prying so hard to get. "Ha. I knew I'd get it out of you."

"You didn't get anything out of me." I retorted as she stood up and skipped towards the door.

"You didn't have to SAY anything… I saw it in your face." She laughed, her hand now on the doorknob. "I can't wait to be friends with her." Before I could tell her no, the door was closed and I was too annoyed to chase after her.

I finally must have fallen asleep, though I'm not quite sure how long it too because the next thing I heard was the buzzing of the alarm that sat on the bed side table. Grumbling, and without opening my eyes I reached across and slammed my hand down more forcibly than I had intended and I opened one eye to make sure I hadn't broken it. The bed felt warm and comfortable and after such a long shift, it was what I needed, still, the fact that I would see Bella again tonight; it was more than enough motivation to get up.

By the time I made my way downstairs everyone was gathered in the living room. Carlisle reading a book, presumably medical related, Jazz and Alice were cuddling on the couch and Esme was flipping through a magazine. Of course, none of this stopped them from looking at me as I jogged down the stairs, and as soon as I saw the looks on their faces, I cursed Alice, thinking in my mind different ways I might go about torturing her for gabbing to the entire family.

"Oh Edward, I found a bottle of wine in the cabinet for you to take. I'm sure they will appreciate it, Carlisle and I brought a few of the bottles back from France the last time we were there." She had put down the magazine already and retreated into the kitchen bringing back with her a bottle of red wine. "It will be perfect."

"Thanks mom." I smiled, kissing her cheek as I took the bottle into my left hand. "It's only dinner though, Emmett wanted me to talk to Bella about her father. I don't want you guys getting a different impression." _Like the one I'm sure Alice has already vocalized to you all… It's not going to happen, stop pushing. My wants are not necessarily her wants._ What was I thinking? How can you like someone this much that you don't even know? It seems impossible.

"Well have a good time anyways." She smiled warmly, knowingly. I tried to brush it off and I grabbed the keys to the Volvo and left them sitting there. _Let them stew._ I grinned as I put the bottle down on the passenger seat and put the car into drive, but I couldn't contain the rapid thumping of my heart against my chest as I drew nearer to their house.

As I pulled up to the house I took notice of the cars, the old red truck that was beginning to rust, the large Jeep that I always saw Emmett in, and the red BMW that I knew belonged to Rosalie. Charlie's cruiser was nowhere to be found, perhaps the department kept it there for safekeeping? The red truck must have belonged to Bella and I couldn't help but smile as I thought of her driving that monster, how adorable she must have looked, and yet, how surprised I was that Charlie would allow his only daughter to drive something that could probably break down at any minute. Still, I imagined that she loved it, she seemed like the kind of girl who treasured her belongings, regardless of whatever anyone else thought.

My eyes drifted to the house and as I knocked on the front door I heard the distant sound of voices arguing before one sentence rang loud and I couldn't help but chuckle. "God Bells, you're a grown woman, people do have sex, stop being such a prude!"

The door swung open and standing there was my dream girl, the girl that I had waited my entire life to meet, the girl I thought never existed. I met her eyes with my own, my nerves suddenly filling my body. Though she wasn't standing very close, I could smell her, the floral scent of gardenias, maybe freesias and they filled my nose and I felt my knees start to go weak. In a desperate attempt to regain my thoughts I smiled nervously, my left lip curling up just slightly. "Hi. I'm Edward."

She didn't speak for a few minutes, well at least it felt like a few minutes, in actuality it was probably only a few seconds but her voice filled my ears. "Bella." She smiled slightly, the corners of her lips turning up just slightly before she bit her lower lip and I wondered if she knew how much more that made me like her. "Though you probably already knew that didn't you, I mean…" She pointed to her chin. In my trance I had forgotten all about it and as soon as my eyes fell to the white bandage that I had only just applied a few hours prior, that feeling of wanting to protect her seemed to fill my bones again.

"I did but I didn't have time to say anything, you ran out of there so quickly." I smiled politely and walked into the house. As I passed by her I let her scent fill my nose once again and I closed my eyes, trying to memorize it. "I'm sorry about that." I smiled politely at her as she showed me into the house. I knew my way around but I didn't want to rain on her parade. Rosalie and Emmett were tangled in each other's arms on the couch and I smiled at them for a moment before stealing a sideways glance towards Bella who had disappeared into the kitchen.

"Cullen!" Emmett smiled, standing up and slapping me lightly on the back. He was always more comfortable when he wasn't in the hospital and that made sense. I wouldn't have been comfortable there either if one of my family members was being treated there. Besides, I knew that part of his transformation was because of Rosalie, she always seemed to calm him down and I knew how much he missed her. Her last trip to LA had been one of her longest, something to do with fashion week and what not. Usually he would go with her but with Charlie in the hospital it just wasn't an option.

"Hey Emmett, Rosalie." I held up the bottle of wine. "Hope you like red."

"I adore red, thank you Edward." Rosalie smiled and sauntered towards me, taking the bottle from my hand. I was male and I had to admit that Rosalie was attractive, it wasn't exactly something that human eyes couldn't register. I also knew how much she liked attention and it surprised me that Emmett wasn't more protective over her, then again, there were men out there who loved it when people noticed the women they were with, I imagined that I would not be one of them. "I'll go grab some glasses and have Bella come out." She disappeared around the corner and into the kitchen leaving Emmett and I alone.

"How was the rest of your day?" I asked, cautiously. "It must be nice to have both your sister and your girlfriend back in one day."

"I'm always happy when Rosalie comes back but part of me is worried about Bells." I pulled my eyebrows together as he said that, unsure as to what he was getting at.

"What do you mean?"

"I really shouldn't talk about it but Bella has some demons she has to face while she is here and I know that it was easy for her to forget about it when she was in California but I'm worried that…" He paused for a moment, listening to the noise in the kitchen. "I'm just worried that she isn't ready, that I pushed her to come home."

I grimaced for a moment, I knew that there had been problems, reasons why she had run away but I figured that if she hadn't been ready to deal with it then she wouldn't have come home, granted, I still had no idea what it was that drove her from Forks to begin with, Emmett had only mentioned that it was a terrible time in her life. "I'm sure things will be okay."

"I hope so." He whispered, looking down for a moment trying to hide his frown.

"Are you ready for dinner?" Bella asked as I looked over, her eyes met my own and it was like she was talking to me but in an instant she looked away, her cheeks flushing. I felt shameful for a moment, afraid that she could read my mind, that she could see all the things that I had been thinking, about how badly I wanted to kiss her, how badly I wanted to hold her in my arms.

Emmett just stood up and I followed him into the dining room. Dinner passed pleasantly enough, Rosalie and Emmett were so exclusive that I found Bella and I had to carry the conversation. Talk flowed easily enough, much easier than I had imagined. We talked about the simple things, the things that most people talk about when you are only just meeting someone; favorite books, movies, songs, music… I wanted to ask her about her past, to find out what was going on in her head but I knew better, I would have to get to know her better, get her to trust me, and I was oaky with that. I just hoped that she stuck around long enough to let that happen. Though, I could always transfer to San Francisco… Unless that seemed like too much of a stalker…

"How long have you worked at the hospital?" She asked, pouring herself a little more wine.

"I've been here for about two years now."

"Do you miss the city?"

"I don't know. Sometimes I guess, but part of me welcomed the change. Do you miss the city?"

"I thought I did." She said softly, almost a whisper and it took me a few minutes to really hear her words. "I met your sister today though." That was spoken with much more volume.

I groaned. "I hope she didn't scare you off."

"No she is wonderful!" Her words were sincere and it made me proud slightly, glad to know that she liked my family. "Her boyfriend is a little intimidating though."

"That's just Jazz… He was my college roommate at Dartmouth and I thought the same thing at first but he's really a great guy once he gets to know you, once you get to know him."

"Wow, I'm surprised you let your little sister date someone that much older than her."

"Six years isn't that bad." I said honestly, though had it been anyone else I probably would have protested more, I trusted Jazz which made all the difference. "And, I don't really have that much a say in it. Besides, he loves her, a lot and who am I to stand in the way of that. You can't really control who you love after all, if I tried to keep them away they would have found a way around it, or she would have spent the rest of her life hating me and I care about her too much for that."

"Well I hope to run into her again a some point. I don't really know people around here anymore and truth be told I don't have that many friends in the area."

"I could be your friend." I said rather sheepishly, my right lip curling up into a small, nervous half smile.

"I'd like that." She said softly back, and I felt as though my heart was going to fly out my chest. At least I had an opening, a chance to win her over, a chance to have her in my life.

**A/N: Wow, once again, thank you to everyone who continues to add this story to their favorites/alerts! I was truly surprised by the amount with the last post! I thought it was important to give some insight into Edward, and I'm not sure why I did it before I explained Bella but her problems are going to be aired soon as well, at least in the next few chapters… **

**As usual I wanted to extend my thanks to those wrote me a comment about the last chapter:  
edwardsbaby4eva  
justm  
MeghanCullen  
rainpuddle13  
Tweemad  
You guys rock! Thanks so much for taking the time! I hope that you enjoyed this chapter as well! I hope that I can get some more feedback from people! I love hearing how people feel the story is progressing: is it too fast/too slow? Am I doing okay capturing the characters? Do you like the characters?**

**As I'm new to Twilight, very new in fact, my friends only just introduced the books to me about two and a half weeks ago (I've read all four of them now… I finished them in about two weeks, and it would have been sooner had I not been swamped with work, stupid senior thesis, stupid college) so I'm still not sure I've really got the voices down pat… So any help/suggestions are warmly appreciated!**

**Hope everyone is having a good week thus far!**


	7. Chapter 7

**Baby You Can Stop Running**

**Chapter Seven**

**BPOV**

I remember reading a short story by Hemmingway a long time ago, well not that long ago. The thing is, it was one of those stories that you read many times throughout your educational career, starting in high school and then literature survey's in college (well at least I did, my double major in Art History and English Literature required me to). _Hills Like White Elephants_, it's one of those stories that you never really forget, the emotions seem to eat at you slowly as you let the meaning behind the words flood through your system. It was one of those stories that make you despise men and their hedonistic nature at the expense of those that they claim to 'love.' The thing is, unless you know the story, have analyzed the story, it's ambiguous.

I've never really thought about abortion much, not really per say. Sure, I'm all for a woman's right to chose, it is after all her body, but the decision isn't one that should be taken lightly. I thought I had it all figured out, my life, my opinions… But things change, people change. College was something I knew I always wanted to do, getting out of Forks was something I knew I wanted to do, having a child, sure, somewhere down the road maybe, but at seventeen? There had been a time in which I thought if I ever got pregnant before I was ready that I wouldn't think twice about the procedure, it's strange how having something growing in your body changes it all, for the first time in my life, the story made sense, I knew how Jig felt, and that terrified me…

I met Jacob Black long before I made my move to Forks permanent. His father, Billy Black was a very close friend of Charlie's and they use to take us fishing when we were younger. When I finally settled down, Jacob came around a lot and what started out as a great friendship turned out to be more than that. I still remember the day that I realized that I had feelings for him that were more than what a friend feels for a friend. We were with a large group at La Push, it was one of those rare days in Washington when the sun actually comes out, and the weather was warm, warm enough to frolic in the surf. I, like my clumsy self, had tripped over a rock on the beach and scrapped my knee pretty badly. Jacob picked me up though, sat me down and as his eyes examined the cut I felt something lurch in my stomach, a feeling of butterflies that I had never had when it came to him. The next thing I knew, we were kissing and I it felt right and I thought nothing could ever change that… That was until a year later when I sat in my bathroom in tears as the little pink line showed on the stick that I held in my hands. What was I going to do?

"_I'm pregnant." I told him looking down and shuffling my feet back and forth. I wanted to meet his eyes but I couldn't, my life was changing at such a rapid pace and this wasn't what I had been expecting. I loved him; at least, I thought I had. Love and lust went hand in hand for me, but his silence, his inability to tell me what was going on in his head made me think that he didn't feel the same way. I wanted to yell, wanted to scream at him, just one word, just something, the silence that had grown between us was more unbearable than anything else was. I just wanted my friend back. _

"_What do you want to do about it?" He questioned after a few minutes of silence, his eyes still focused on the horizon and the sun that was beginning to set. _

"_I don't know…"_

"_I can't…" He started, his voice harsh, disconnected from everything else and I could feel my eyes as they began to tear up. It was like he blamed me, but last I checked it took two to make a baby._

"_I didn't ask you to."_

"_You have options."_

"_I'm not sure I do." I reached up and brushed a few of the stray tears away from my cheeks. _

"_I can go with you." _

"_If I do that, I need to do it alone."_

"_I'm too young…" _

"_And you think I'm not? I had a plan… A future that I had set for me and that all changed when that line showed up."_

"_You only took one test?" His eyes still hadn't met my own. I was waiting to get out of there to really allow myself to cry but the more time that we stood there on the beach, the harder it was to keep it in. Obviously coming here hadn't been the right thing, telling him hadn't been the right thing. I suppose I thought he would have been more understanding, that he would have cared more, that he loved me more than that. _

"_I took three." _

"_I can give you money for it."_

"_I don't want your money…" I wasn't sure how much longer I could stay there, my heart was breaking and he was only making things worse._

"_I can't…" It was his only reply, and it was the second time that it had slipped from his lips._

"_Did you ever love me?"_

"_It's not about that."_

"_Isn't it?" My words came out shaky this time, my breathing ragged and heavy. _

"_I'm sorry." _

"_Me too…" I replied as I stood up and walked away, leaving him there on the beach alone._

I hadn't spoken with him since that day and only Emmett knew the reality behind what was truly going on and still there were things that I hid from him. So, did I go ahead with the abortion? I thought about it, seriously thought about it, I even went to the clinic a few times but each time something stopped me. I couldn't do that, I couldn't give kill it even though I was angry with it. I hated it, hated that it seemed to latch onto me like a parasite, effectively killing my dreams, my life, and my spirit. Still, I couldn't do it and I hated that I couldn't, so I deferred my admission to Stanford for a semester, long enough to have the baby, and put it up for adoption. It seemed like the only option, the only thing that I could do, I couldn't give the child the life that it needed, the life that it deserved.

Giving birth wasn't exactly a piece of cake, especially when you're alone. Emmett wanted to come down and be there for me but I wouldn't let him. I didn't want anyone attaching themselves to the baby when I would only give it up in the end. Emmett said that I might change my mind, but I wasn't going to be like my mom, I wasn't going to get pregnant right after high school and become a mom. Still, after that last final push, the doctor handed her to me. I had a baby girl, and she was beautiful, and my heart ached. I always thought it was a myth, the whole, you love your baby more than anything else in the world when you first lay eyes on them, how could I possibly love something that I so adamantly hated while it was in my womb? But I did… Maybe because it was a piece of my relationship with Jacob, a reminder of how good things had been before they went sour, maybe because I had spent nine months with her growing inside of me, I'm still not sure. What I did know was that not a single day went by that I didn't regret my decision, wonder how she was, wonder what she looked like, if she had my pale skin or Jacobs russet skin, if her hair was sprinkled with red like mine, if it was curly or straight. Still, I gave her a name, and no one else knows that, not even Emmett, in my mind, I called her Elizabeth, Elizabeth Renee Swan.

I tried to go home after the birth. I even got on the plane to Seattle, and when I got there Emmett had been waiting for me at SeaTac and as soon as I saw him, I couldn't stop crying. He wrapped me up in his arms and sat with me there in the luggage claim as my tears soaked his shirt until I couldn't cry anymore. It was then that I realized how bad the idea had been, I wasn't ready to face it, to face him, or Charlie, or Billy, or Jacob… I couldn't even face my friends, Angela, Ben… I think for the first time Emmett saw how hard it was, how painful the process had been which is why he never pressured me, he merely stayed with me at a hotel that night, holding me as I cried. I had never been more thankful for a big brother in my life, especially one that was so understanding. The next morning he put me back on a plane to San Francisco and until today, I hadn't stepped foot onto Washington soil, nor had I had any desire to.

I later got a letter from Angela that Emmett had pounded on Jacob pretty hard right around the holidays. I imagine that it happened not long after my plane was in the air, heading back to Stanford for my first Christmas of what would soon become many alone. Apparently Jacob had been in town getting parts to fix a car when Emmett saw him walking around and walked up to him. Poor guy, he thought it was only going to be a pleasant conversation but as Angela had witnessed it (she had been working at the coffee shop and the fight happened just outside the glass doors), Emmett didn't even give him a chance to talk, his fist went flying straight into Jacobs perfect face, breaking his nose, and then he delivered one last punch into his stomach. I chided Emmett on the phone but I secretly adored him for it, at least Jacob could feel some kind of pain, even if it didn't come close to the pain that he had put me through.

After Jacob, I never dated and I found myself in a state of forced celibacy. There had been men that had been interested, I merely blew them off thinking that they were all the same. After the pain that Jacob had caused, I was terrified to let anyone else in my life for fear that it would only end in the same heartache. But then things changed, one person and everything that I had once thought, had once believed, changed.

Meeting Edward now seemed to change my whole perspective of things. He was gorgeous, there was no doubt about that, presumably the most attractive man that I had ever seen in my life but there was more than that about him. Somehow, as we sat there and talked, even about meaningless tidbits, there was something that was unspoken between us, something that told me that if anyone knew pain, at least on the same page as I did, it was him. There was something in his eyes, something dark and tortured and I realized that I knew that look all too well, it was the same one that I saw in my eyes when I looked in the mirror.

Rosalie and Emmett had retreated to his room shortly after Edward had left and I found myself on the couch, the glare of the TV the only light in the room and although it was on, I only seemed to be looking through it. My phone rang startling me and I picked it up, Angela's name lighting up the screen and I sighed, not sure if I wanted to deal with this, not sure I wanted to be yelled at because I knew that Jessica had probably alerted the town to my presence.

"Hello?" I asked, timidly.

"Bella freakin' Swan how dare you not tell me that you were back in town!" Her words were slurred and I assumed that she had knocked back a few drinks, presumably at the local bar. Jessica Stanley must have opened her big fat mouth.

"I'm sorry Angela. I just got in this morning and I was at the hospital and with Emmett all day." I sighed, her voice wasn't as harsh as I had been expecting but I was hoping that she didn't demand that I make an appearance at the bar, turning her down wouldn't be an option, that would surely make her angry, and as I had told Edward, right now I needed all the friends I could get, and Angela was one of my oldest friends.

"Oh…" That seemed to shut her up but I could hear Ben in the background telling her to get me out of the house. "What are you doing? You should be down here, I want to see you! I haven't seen you in a year!"

"I don't know… I'm so tired."

"I won't take no for an answer."

"Fine…" I grumbled, pulling myself off the couch that my body had warmed. "I'll be there in five minutes." I heard her yell what I assumed was a Yay before she hung up and I grabbed my jacket and put it on, before venturing into the cold and to a crowded bar to see two people I cared about, Angela and Ben, and what I figured was a bunch of people I didn't care about, Mike, Laruen, Jessica, Tyler… I could probably go one much longer but I won't bother.

I wasn't surprised to see what was basically the entire Forks population aged twenty-one to about thirty, if they were single, was present in the bar. As my eyes scanned the crowd they first fell upon the short, pixie haired girl that I had met earlier that day, Edwards sister. Her eyes flicked towards me as I entered the bar and she smiled, and I couldn't help but notice that there was something about her smile that was infectious and I smiled back and waved before I felt a small set of arms wrap around me and a strong blast of alcohol in my face.

"Bella!" She grinned as I turned to see the six foot frame of my best friend in Forks and I couldn't help but wonder if it had been college that had made my once shy friend more outgoing, or if it was a product of her enthusiastic boyfriend.

"Hi Angela." I smiled warmly as we pulled away, only to see that Ben was on her tail and he took hugged me.

"Come on, you need a drink!" She grinned, grabbing my hand and pulling me towards the bar. I wanted to protest but as I looked over my shoulder to Ben he only seemed to shrug and laugh, letting her pull me into her world.

The night for the most part passed rather uneventfully, I was thankful that Mike kept his distance. It wasn't that I didn't like him as a friend, he was a decent enough person, I just didn't want him hanging on me. Though, as Jessica seemed to hang on him he never had the chance. I was thankful for that, thankful that Jessica was always worried that Mike might leave her for me, even though I would never have him. I was pleasantly surprised when Alice came over and introduced herself to the rest of the group, though none of them paid any attention to her except for Angela who took a liking to her as well. I even found that I was more comfortable around Jasper this time around, Edwards explanations of his personality helped me understand that it wasn't me but rather his personality.

"How was dinner?" Alice grinned and I found that my cheeks had turned bright red as I watched her eyebrows lift with curiosity.

"Oh, it was good." I smiled back, hoping that she didn't read too much into it. The last thing I wanted her to know was how much I liked her brother, especially when I knew that there was no chance in hell that he could like me the same way. Seems to be my kind of luck though, after all those years of turning men away, the first man that I actually like is too good for me.

"So when are you seeing Edward again?" My eyes widened with that and I was thankful that I was able to keep my mouth closed so I could finish swallowing the whiskey that I had only just taken a sip of.

"What?" I stuttered after I felt the liquor burn my throat, my heart racing in my chest.

"Oh you know… He's going to have to take the stitches out." My heart slowing down thankful that she was not implying what I thought she was. Though I also realized that she had interpreted my reaction and the smile on her face made me curse my inability to hide my emotions, surely she would go and tell him now, tell him how his patient had a colossal crush on him, not that that was probably anything new to him.

"Oh… Um, I don't know." It was the truth, of all the things that we had talked about it seemed that the date for when I would need the stitches removed was forgotten, even Charlie had been forgotten, the main reason why Emmett had wanted him to come over. Alice didn't respond, she merely smiled her wide, infectious smile which seemed to waver when her eyes caught something.

As I felt a hand on my shoulder, a warm, large hand, I realized what it was. I knew that hand, knew it all too well. I had loved it once, loved the way it made me feel but as it laid there, almost limp on my shoulder I wanted to die. I closed my eyes tight, registering the look on Alice's face before my eyelids were jammed together.

"Bella…" His voice was soft, a whisper almost and I could feel the tears as they started to accumulate behind my closed lids. "Bella look at me."

"Why should I?" I gritted through my teeth as he placed both hands on my shoulders and forcibly turned me to look towards him.

"We need to talk."

"Jacob there isn't anything to talk about." That was a lie, but I didn't know how to talk to him anymore. Besides, did he really have a right to know what I had been hiding? He never wanted anything to do with it anyways, hell, if he had his way, I would have had the abortion.

"Yes Bella there is." I didn't talk, I didn't even open my eyes and it wasn't until his fingers were under my chin, tilting my head up to look at him and I allowed myself to open them, tears streaming down the corners of my eyes, giving away my pain, the one thing I didn't want him to see. "You never came back… I couldn't get in touch with you… You just disappeared."

"It's what you wanted."

"That's not true."

"Well you sure made it seem that way."

"Bella I was seventeen years old!"

"So was I."

"How was I suppose to process that kind of information?"

"You had a month before I left to process that information and you never came around. It doesn't matter anymore, it's done, it's over, and so are we."

"You never gave me a chance to understand, never gave me a chance to apologize." The tears were streaming down my cheeks now and I was completely unable to hold them back any longer. Through my blurry eyes I could see Alice still standing here, her face no longer smiling but filled with a concerned look and she leaned over and pulled Jasper down to her height, whispering something in his ear.

"You had plenty of time Jacob… Stop trying to act like the victim here, stop making me out to be the villain. The only thing wrong that I did was love you… Now I'm not even sure what I ever saw in you."

"Don't say that."

"I can't do this right now…" I whispered, my heart racing in my chest, a combination of anger, pain and sadness and my body couldn't keep up with it. "I can't… I have to go." I turned, pulling myself from his grasp and falling on the floor in the process. Jasper was right behind me, helping me to gain my footing before I ran out of the door, frantically searching my pockets for my keys.

"Bella are you okay?" Alice's voice filled the silence outside of the bar and I turned to see her and Jasper running towards me.

"I… I just have to get out of here but Angela has my purse… I can't go back in there." I stammered, rubbing my arms as I realized that not only had I left my purse but my coat as well. I watched as Jasper shrugged his jacket off and put it around my shoulders.

"You can come with us… I can give you a ride home or you can come to my house if you like. There is plenty of room if you aren't really ready to go home." Did I want to go home? I wanted to see Emmett but I knew that he was busy with Rosalie and the last thing I wanted to do was disrupt them, but I knew I needed to talk, or at least, to be around someone who cared enough to help me out. Alice seemed to be one of those people right now.

"Are you sure you don't mind? I don't want to impose…"

"It's not an imposition, I'm offering." The worry had been wiped from her face, she was smiling again, and I nodded. It was much better than being alone. I knew, more than anything, that I didn't want to be alone. I watched as she pulled her phone out, dialing a number as Jasper showed me the way to the bright yellow Porsche.

"Hey Edward… Can you let Mom and Dad know that I'm bringing Bella over?" She said softly. "She just needs a place to go and she can't go home right now, do you want to talk to her?" I looked out the window, praying that he didn't, this wasn't how I wanted him to see me, broken… I should have just had her take me home. "We'll be home in ten minutes, bring a jacket out, Bella doesn't have one." I watched her grin through the mirror as she shut her phone and I tried to steady my breathing, I was going to see Edward again and I wasn't sure if I was happy about that, or desperately worried that he had no idea what he was getting himself into when he said he wanted to be my friend.

**A/N:**

**So I thought you should know what was going on with Bella… And I'm just wondering if it was what you had expected? Do you like it? Does it bring enough depth to her character? Anyways, as always thank you so much to everyone who continues to add this story! It overwhelms me! I'd also like to thank those who took the time to review and to let me know what they thought about the last chapter!:  
Inu-ru831  
spinter1  
Dark as night bright as day: I'm going to work on Edwards dialect in the next chapter as he will make an appearance again… Thank you for pointing that out!  
FutureMrsCullen  
MeghanCullen  
rainpuddle13: Edward was 10 when his parents died, making him 17 now… The story is kind of set in the future, I'm pretending that we are in 2009 as it was the only way to make him old enough to be where he was in his medical career! I will go into more depth though! I hope that cleared that up!  
justm**

**You guys all rock! And I hope that you liked the new chapter! Please continue to let me know! You help feed the muse!**


	8. Chapter 8

**Baby You Can Stop Running**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight… Or some of the ideas that I took from Midnight Sun in this chapter. All that belongs to Stephanie Meyer and my wish that I had thought of it first. **

**Chapter Eight**

**EPOV**

Leaving Bella was something I hated doing, and it tore at me from the depths of my stomach. It was painful, but pleasurably so, it was as though my soul was aching to stay with her and in trying to tear it away it was protesting. The feeling was unlike anything I had ever experienced, a perfect blend of longing and happiness and I wondered if she could feel it too, if the current that seemed to shoot through my body shot through hers as well.

Attraction is a funny thing. With its many sides, I had never thought to contemplate it much, always having other things to do. But now, as I sat in the driver's seat of my car, my hands gripping the steering wheel tightly as I tried to push the ache in my stomach away, I began to wonder if this was more than attraction.

I had no idea if Bella was attracted to me, unlike the other people in this tiny town; her face was the one that I had the hardest time reading. It wasn't like Jessica's, her blatant gawking, her mouth slightly agape, Bella had this calm, almost cool look, completely and totally void of expression. Comparing her responses to those of the other people around town seemed pointless, she wasn't like them, she was different and I it infuriated me that I couldn't tell what was going on with her.

Driving down the main street my mind wandered and I pictured her face, then her body. I began to wonder how it would feel to have my arms wrapped around her fragile self, pulling her tight against me as I brushed my hand down her pale, blushing cheeks. I thought about tracing the soft tips of my fingers against her full lips, the look on her face as her eyes met mine, the expecting look, the longing as I lean my face closer to hers, her warm breath against my face tempting me to do the one thing I know I shouldn't. I felt my breathing quicken as I thought about her lips on my own, her hands pressed against my chest.

I flinched away from my thoughts; I couldn't let myself think like that. This wouldn't do, it was an impossible dilemma, I was too attracted to Bella already, and that didn't bode well for me. Still, my prying into her life this evening, the questions, all of it, the near insistence that she allow me to be her friend, could it work? Should I want Bella to be attracted to me? Especially after everything that I had done, that I was capable of? My only answer was no. I couldn't have her be attracted to me, let alone love me when I was far from worthy of it. I wasn't the man that my warm, beating heart appeared to portray me as; I was merely a monster, an empty shell of a man, unworthy of anything as pure and innocent as her and her love.

For the first time in my life, I found myself aching to be a better person. I was aching to change the decisions of my past so to shape a better future for myself, a future that could include her. My feelings left me baffled, left me so confused because for the first time since James' execution, I _felt_ human. It was a feeling that was almost completely new to me, something I had not allowed myself to imagine and I had no way to understand it, as I had nothing to compare it to. The feelings that I were feeling for her were pure, beyond my own control. But did she feel it too? I tried to tell myself that it didn't matter, her feelings should not have been my concern, I couldn't be with her, I couldn't let her be tarnished by the monster that I am.

I walked into the house, tossing my keys down on the table. Esme was sitting in the living room and she looked up and smiled softly at me as I walked towards the piano. It had been years since I had touched it, had allowed my fingertips to sweep over the top of the ivory colored keys. I wondered if it was still tuned, it had been so long since anyone had sat at it and made music. I felt Esme's eyes on me and I turned to look at her, her face almost unreadable.

"How was dinner?" Alice asked, quickly making her way down the stairs until she stood in front of Jasper, his arms wrapping around her diminutive waist, pulling her closer to him.

I didn't respond, instead I centered my eyes back to the piano, my body involuntarily pulling the bench back so I could sit down. I pressed on one of the keys and to my surprise; it was still in perfect tune. In that moment, everything else went blank and it seemed that there wasn't anyone else around, just the Steinway and me. As I fiddled with the keys I felt Esme's hand on my back, effectively pulling me from my trance and I turned to look up at her, her warm smile filled the air.

"You're playing again." Though she intended it to sound like a question, it merely sounded like a statement. I added a harmonizing line, letting the central melody weave through it. It was something that I had thought about while at Bella's house and I realized that maybe my plan to keep her at a distance, to keep her as merely a friend was going to be harder than I thought. "It's new…" Her voice spoke again as I changed it slightly with a bass line. "What is it?"

"I'm not sure yet." I lied, I knew exactly what it was, what it meant, what it symbolized.

"Is there a story to it?" I could hear from the tone of her voice that she knew me better than I had hoped, that she knew that the product of this song was not just my own inspiration, no, it was a product of the muse that had stumbled into my life rather ungracefully but perfectly all the same.

"It's…" I searched my mind for the word that I needed to describe the soft tune; the tune that I felt encompassed everything about her that I loved, that I desired. "A lullaby." The fact was, there was a story to the song, to Bella's lullaby. It was everything that she encompassed; her beauty, even though she was seemingly oblivious to it, the strength that I knew she must have to carry the burden of whatever it was she was hiding, and her innocence, something so pure, so complete and it radiated off of her.

"It's perfect." She smiled, leaning down to drop a kiss on the crown of my head before retreating to the couch, giving me my time, my space to work the kinks from the song, until it was perfect enough to be worthy of her name.

"Edwards composing again?" I could hear Alice's voice across the room and I presumed that the only answer that she was elicited was a gentle nod of Esme's head. "Oh this is too perfect." I kept the melody the same, allowing the tone to drift lower, and slower before it came to an end, I couldn't change it, I couldn't bring myself to do that, because the song, just like her, was perfect and any change would merely tarnish it, merely change everything that she was, everything that she stood for.

I pushed myself from the piano as I finished the song, there was no need to write it down, it burned in my mind; which keys to press when, how they sounded as they played harmoniously. My eyes fell on Alice who merely looked at me, her eyes conveying her happiness and I knew that I couldn't keep her from Bella, that song had been me baring my soul.

"Where are you going?" I finally asked, the silence in the room now broken.

"Jazz and I are going down to the bar for a bit. Do you want to come with us?" I looked at her and Jazz and decided that I didn't really feel like spending the entire night as the third wheel and I shook my head. Besides, the more I thought about it, the more tired I felt. The two hour nap that I had taken prior to going to the Swan's house had done nothing but merely postpone the inevitable. "Are you sure? Bella might be there..."

"No. I'm tired I think I'll go lay down." My fear was that seeing Bella would cause me to do things I was trying desperately to not do, and if alcohol was involved, I wasn't sure that I could walk away from her if she was there, if she had a social lubricant in her. Still, that was only my inner hope that she had feelings for me. An inner hope that I somehow needed to learn to squelch. "Have fun." I smiled, watching as she merely shrugged and skipped out of the house, Jasper on her arm.

"It's going to be fine Edward. It's going to be okay, you deserve happiness. Fate owes you that." Esme said softly, with a look in her eyes that made me wish that I could believe her. "She'll love you back. If she's as bright as I imagine she is, she will have no choice. You, my son, are a catch and anyone would be blind to not see that."

"I'm blushing mom." I smiled. Though my cheeks were still neutral, it appeased her and at least I couldn't feel the nagging guilt within my stomach, the pain that always seemed to transpire when Esme told me how wonderful I was. Like any good mother, she was blind to my flaws, blind to the monster that lurked deep within me, that latched onto my life like a parasite. "Good night." I said to both Esme and Carlisle before taking the steps two at a time, knowing that my bed was only a few feet away. I just hoped that I could sleep, that I could push away all thoughts of Bella Swan, and sleep.

It's never that easy though is it? I had changed from my clothes, had wrapped myself deep within the feather-filled comforter, allowed my body to warm it, and yet sleep just would not take over my body. Each time I closed my eyes my eyes saw only her and I hated it. At least, I told myself I hated it but that didn't stop me from continuously closing my eyes, or letting my mind wander to places that I never should have let them go. I was weak to stop it, and I partially didn't want it to end, I wanted to continue to live in my fantasy, but I knew that I would hate myself even more for it later. Then again, I didn't really have time to think about it, my phone was ringing and Alice's name lit up the small screen.

"Alice what's wrong?" She started to sputter some things about Bella coming over and I felt myself shoot up into a sitting position, my heart racing as I thought about everything that could have happened to her, the trouble she could have gotten into. "Is everything okay?" I knew that my voice was laden with concern, a concern that even Alice could read through, could tell her that my feelings were more than strictly platonic. When she asked if I wanted to speak to her, I almost shouted a yes but I knew that it was dangerous territory, I would see her soon, I would just have to steady my rapidly beating heart and wait. "No, it's okay. I'll tell Mom and Dad. I'll see you soon." My mind had shut off, I merely heard her mutter something about bringing a jacket out to the car when they got there as Bella didn't have one and I muttered a compliance before pressing the red button.

They were at the house about ten minutes later and I was waiting in the driveway, one hand clutching on the jacket I pulled from my closet. Her eyes were puffy and red from crying and it made my heart throb, but I wrapped the jacket around her, allowing my hands to linger on her shoulders for a few moments until her gaze met my own. Startled, I stepped back, afraid that I had over stepped a boundary. Alice was merely smiling wide as she watched and I glared at her, not wanting her to egg this on. The last thing I needed was someone pushing me, though I was thankful that she brought her here. This had to only be the result of her demons.

The house was quiet, Esme and Carlisle had already gone to sleep by the time I raced down the stairs so I thought nothing about not waking them up. So when we walked in the house I was surprised to see them standing there, wrapped in their robes and looking confused. Alice merely ushered them up the stairs, looking back at me only for a moment to glare at me, presumably because she figured that my mind had been too muddied to follow through with her orders.

Jasper stood in the back, his hands thrust deep into his pockets as though he was feeling rather out of place. I led her to the couch, motioning for her to sit down and she did but her eyes would not meet my own. That was probably a good thing. Without another word my feet carried me towards the kitchen, with all her crying water would be a necessity. Still, I couldn't figure out what was happening, why she was so distraught when she had been pleasant when I had last left her at her house. What could have happened to have caused this dramatic change?

"What happened?" I asked, filling the glass with ice as I turned to look at Jasper who cowered next to the doorframe.

"I don't know, some guy was trying to talk to her… Personal stuff. I try to stay out of it." He shrugged. "Alice followed after her when she ran out and I merely just followed."

I felt myself scowling and I cursed whoever it was that had caused this change in her. She shouldn't have to be like this, she should be happy, all the time. It pained me to see the tears fill her eyes. Whoever was responsible for this was surely a worse monster than myself, how could anyone want to hurt an angel? I shook my head trying to shake the thoughts from my mind, this wasn't what she needed, I needed to be rational, I needed to be her friend, it was the only option that I had.

I walked back to the room and she was sitting there, tears now gone from her eyes but they were still puffy, still red from the irritation. I set the glass down and she grimaced, I assumed she wasn't use to having people do things for her. _Tough… She'll have to get use to it._ We sat there in silence for a while, this was one of those times that I really wished that I could read her mind, could see into it and figure out how to make things better. I never liked seeing people upset, but on her, it was even worse, it tore me up inside in a way that I don't think I can even describe. This wasn't what I wanted for her, it wasn't what she was suppose to have. I just wished that I could show her that she deserved better but I didn't want to because better didn't include me.

"Are you okay?" I asked, my voice cautious as I locked my hands between my legs. I couldn't let myself touch her. "Do you want me to call Emmett? I can take you home?" I felt so out of place, so confused, so unsure as to what she wanted and the look that her face gave off wasn't helping. It infuriated me, frustrated me.

"No… I don't want to bother Emmett and Rosalie." She said softly and I wasn't sure if I was happy or upset about that. It seemed that she was good at putting others before her, it was probably why she looked so uncomfortable as Alice and I tried to diffuse the situation, as we tried to make things even slightly better. "He might be at the house…" Her voice was whisper soft and if the house hadn't been so quiet I'm not sure I would have heard it.

"He?" I felt my hand clench into a fist as a mixture of emotions flared through my body, rage and jealousy the two that I realized were the most prominent.

"Jacob… I really don't want to talk about it though." She replied and I noticed that over the course of her time in the house she had managed to relax slightly, her body not as rigid as it had been when Alice and Jasper had pulled up into the driveway.

"Bella I made up the guest room for you… I can get you a change of clothes." Alice spoke, her voice interrupting my thoughts.

"I don't think your clothes are going to fit me." She smiled. It was a weak smile but I would take that, it was better than the frown, the one that I desperately wanted to change. I was fighting an inner battle with myself, the part of me that wanted to reach over, to pull her into my arms and hold her until she fell asleep, to make her safe, to let her know that she was safe. But the other part of me was telling me not to, that in doing so it would only make me want her more and I wasn't sure I would be able to stop myself.

"I can give you a shirt if you like." I interrupted and her gaze shifted to mine quickly.

"I can sleep in my clothes."

"Nonsense." I replied and I was standing and making my way to my room before she could protest. I left her sitting there with Alice and I couldn't for the life of me figure out if I was okay with that. I still wasn't sure what I was going to do about her. Did I want to be with her, without a doubt, was it the right thing for her, no. It bothered me that Alice had taken to her so quickly. I understood why, it was hard not to like her, but still, I was afraid that she would grow too close to her.

I fumbled about my dresser before pulling out a white undershirt and long track pants. It was all I could really offer but I figured that it was much more comfortable than anything Alice would have given her. I left them on the bed of the guest room, which of course was right next to mine, at least, the one that Alice had made up for her. The house was large, much larger than any of the others in Forks but it was merely because they liked their space, but it meant there were quite a few extra rooms. Alice could have chosen from three others, and yet she put her right next to me. I wasn't sure if I wanted to kiss her or kill her. The temptation would linger there all night and I prayed that I didn't do anything that I would regret.

"I put them on the bed." I said softly, walking back into the room. She turned to face me and she smiled slightly and I found that I curled the left side of my lip up, a nervous habit, at least when the left side rose. I wanted to go and sit next to her but I kept my feet planted to the ground, as it was I could smell her from where I was, a good four feet away from her and my nose was filled with the scent of flowers.

"Thank you… I'm really sorry about all this."

She was sorry? For what? I couldn't fathom what was going through her mind.

"Are you tired? You must be tired." Alice spoke and she nodded. I almost wanted to curse at Alice for that but I was thankful that I didn't. I was tired too, maybe to the point of exhaustion but I wanted to be around her, I didn't want to leave her just yet.

"I think I should… I don't want to cause anymore problems."

Incredulous. She was a living martyr, putting others before herself. I without a doubt could not be around that, I didn't deserve to be around that. The monster within me would only end up hurting her, and she would blame herself. I couldn't let that happen.

The night was unbearable. I was fighting an inner battle with myself, the battle to go into her room and the battle to stay. I wasn't sure how long I could do it. I had to find a way to remove the temptation. So I did, I got out of bed and went downstairs, finding my place at the piano as I began to play the lullaby that I had only composed a few hours ago. The soft music filled my ears and allowed my mind to wander, to think of her, to think of playing it for her. I imagined her, sprawled across the large bed, her dark hair covering her face, spread out like a mahogany fan, her mouth slightly agape as she took slow, steady breaths.

My fingers stopped, and I looked up to see her standing there, and I found the left side of my lip curling up into a small smile. I felt my heart stop as I looked at her and I wondered why I felt this nervous, how a simple girl could drive me this insane, could cause this inner battle within myself.

"I'm sorry for waking you."

"You didn't. I just couldn't sleep." She replied, frozen in place. Had she seen into my soul? Had she seen the wickedness that dwelled there? Was she afraid of me?

"Do you need anything?"

"I just didn't really want to be alone I guess." I felt myself grimace and as I looked at her I noticed her face fall. The part of me that wanted her took pleasure in it, the other part fear, fear because the more time that I spent analyzing her, the more I realized that maybe she was feeling the same way, and I wasn't sure how I felt about that. Still, my heart warmed.

"I can stay with you if you like, for a little while, until you fall asleep." She seemed to think about that for a minute before she nodded. This was after all, something that a friend would do. I just couldn't allow myself to get into the bed with her, no, I would sit in the chair and I would watch her. Hopefully all she would need was my presence. It was all I could give her right now, all I could bring myself to give her. For now at least…

**A/N: I hope that you enjoyed the new chapter! Sorry for the late post, I had a job interview in Seattle… fingers crossed I need the money! So, I know that a lot of this was taken from Midnight Sun but a lot of it has to do with my want to somewhat follow the original plot line, in the major stuff, like feelings and what not… Anyways, once again, I'm always surprised with how many people add this story to their alerts and favorites each time I post! Thank you! I'm so glad that you like it enough to want to read my updates!**

**I'd also like to thank everyone who commented on the last chapter!  
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**You guys are amazing! Thank you for all the positive feedback! Please continue to send it this way, you guys inspire me! I hope that you liked the new chapter!**

**I hope everyone has a great Friday!**


	9. Chapter 9

**Baby You Can Stop Running**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight… And like I said in the last chapter, I unfortunately do not own some of the ideas taken from Midnight Sun… God I wish she would just publish it and put us all out of our misery. I think I love Edward more because of it.**

**Chapter Nine**

**BPOV**

Edward's clothes were too large for me, I had to roll the track pants about ten times before the crotch was in the proper location, but still, I was comfortable. I lifted the collar of the white shirt to my nose, taking a deep breath and smelling the musky, fresh scent that was all Edwards. I closed my eyes, imagining the shirt tight against his body and I felt my cheeks blush a fierce shade of crimson. I was thankful that I was alone. Still, I wondered what he was doing, was he asleep? I thought of him then, sprawled out on his bed, his beautiful emerald eyes hidden behind his closed eyelids, his messy bronze hair pushed against the pillow. As my breathing changed, I realized that I shouldn't be thinking such thoughts and instead filed them away for when I was in private.

I walked around the room, never having seen a residence look so grand. The guest bedroom was large, and it only made me wonder what the others could possibly look like. The north-facing wall was almost completely made of glass, though to make sure the light would not enter, Alice had pulled the curtains across it. My eyes moved to the bed, so immaculately made that I felt guilty for even thinking about sleeping in it. How could someone mess something so perfect? I was terrified that I might clutter the flawless room. The last thing I wanted, after everything that they had already done for me, was to be a burden, to have them clean up after me.

A found small bookshelf by a large crushed velvet arm chair and as I kneeled down my eyes scanned the hard cover books. I smiled, my thumb tracing the leather binding of a vintage Charlotte Bronte, _Jane Eyre_. I pulled it out, bringing it to my nose and smelling the scent of the old book, letting it fill my nose, a temporary relief from the scent of Edward that clung to my body that lingered on the back of my throat so that with each breath I took I was reminded of his inhumanly desirable smell.

I opened the book to one of my favorite quotes, to one of my favorite explanations of human desire, of human love that I had ever been able to come across. "I sometimes have a queer feeling with regard to you—especially when you are near me, as now: it is as if I had a string somewhere under my left ribs, tightly and inextricably knotted to a similar string situated in the corresponding quarter of your little frame. And if that boisterous channel, and two hundred miles or so old land came broad between us, I am afraid that cord of communion will be snapt, and then I've a nervous notion I should take to bleeding inwardly." I felt myself swoon at Edward Rochester's beautiful words. I wondered if a man like that could possibly exist, or if all the great characters, all the great loves and men, only existed in the minds of the women who had created them.

Still, I had never fully understood the words that were spoken by the great fictional character, that is, until I met my own Edward. I laughed at the curious notion that their first names were the same but pushed it away, chiding myself for thinking such an immature thought. Regardless, I seemed to finally understand, to finally know what it meant to feel as though the fiber of my being was somehow connected to another's. From the moment that I first laid eyes on him, there was something, something that seemed to latch onto me and hold me in place, a yearning deep within the pits of my stomach that called for him. It was as though our souls were somehow connected, and they longed to be together. _Stupid Bella, it's just a figment of your imagination, a result of too many years alone._

I could hear music playing lightly from outside the door and curiously, I placed the book down on the bed, the page still open and walked to the door. I faintly remember it having a slight squeak so I opened it slowly, the music filling my ears. I found my way to the stairs and slowly descended them, listening to each note that was played and feeling as though somehow I had heard it before, and yet, I could not place the beautiful melody.

As I reached the bottom of the stairs, I saw him there, sitting at the piano while his hands moved along the keys. The room was almost dark save from the light that the moon cast through the wall of windows. It made his bronze hair and pale skin seem to shimmer, and though I couldn't see his eyes, I assumed that they too would have sparkled in the soft light. I wondered how he could read the sheet music with so little illumination but as I moved a few inches closer I realized that he was playing from memory, that where the paper should have laid, there was nothing.

I'm still not sure how long I stood there, my eyes on him, watching and listening to him. It seemed that even for the briefest of moments I was seeing in his soul, seeing a part of him that I had never imagined existed. There seemed to be some sort of passion, a deep hidden fervor that anyone would have missed had they not been witnessing what I was. Even though my obvious attraction to him, there had been something mysterious about him, as though he was trying to hide something from the world, something that he feared would give him away, that would make others turn in shame. It was a feeling that I knew all too well, but watching him at the piano gave him a depth that I had never seen before and it only made my attraction to him grow. I wondered how many others had seen him like this, if I was the first or if there had been others before, others who, like me could only stare, unable to find the words to express the moment. For the first time, his cool exterior did not match the warming exterior and it was a beautiful sight to see, one that I hoped that I would someday see again, and one that I knew I would forever keep filed deep within my memory.

He stopped abruptly and I realized that his eyes were now open and staring at me intently. The intensity behind his gaze startled me, and I jumped, taking a few steps back. I felt my face grow hot as I blushed once again and I hated that it gave me away so easily, hated that he would know that my thoughts had been on the impure side. Still, I couldn't bring myself to look away from him and I wondered what he was thinking. He merely sat there and it seemed like he was waiting for me to speak first, though I had no words and the silence only seemed to stretch. It was hardly something that I could be blamed for; he dazzled me beyond comprehension and left me speechless, something that no one had ever been able to do before. As we continued to stare at each other, both, I'm assuming, waiting for the other to speak first, I couldn't help but think that my first impressions of his appearance had been so remarkably wrong, his perfections were even greater than I had imagined. In that moment, with the light casting on his pale skin making it look like marble, I thought he looked like David, a perfect representation of a man, though unlike the one that sat in the Accademia Gallery in Florence, there was one very distinct difference. The man before me, unlike the marble statue that Michelangelo had once spent three years chiseling away at, was not made of stone, but rather warm flesh that could be touched and explored with human hands.

His quiet, musical voice filled the silence that had grown between us; he must have grown bored waiting for me to speak. But how could I? There was too much to take in just by looking at him, it didn't help that his voice only added to the perfection that was Edward Cullen. "I'm sorry for waking you."

"You didn't," I assured him, not wanting him to think that such a beautiful melody could ever be considered a disturbance. "I just couldn't sleep." Not far from a lie, the truth being that I didn't want to sleep, didn't want to mess the tidy nature of the room that they had given me to use for the night. I was beginning to regret not accepting his offer to take me home, though if I knew Jacob, he would probably have gone straight there in an attempt to talk.

"Do you need anything?" I couldn't tell but his voice seemed somewhat harsher, annoyed maybe? I had after all interrupted his creativity.

Looking at him though, I began to feel that ache deep within me, like the one similar to what Rochester had spoken of. A pain so intense but neither uncomfortable nor unbearable, rather, I welcomed it, enjoyed it, and savored the feeling, wondering if anyone else, someone that I was worthy to be around, someone more on my level, would ever have this effect on me. "I just didn't really want to be alone I guess." I watched as his face pulled into a grimace and I couldn't help but cast my eyes downward and I hoped that he didn't notice my disappointed reaction. Had I crossed an unspoken boundary? Was I so repulsive to him that it offended him? I wasn't versed on the common practices of beautiful people, never having lived in their world, so was my request unreasonable? Not that it was much of a request, he had asked a simple question and I merely gave him an answer. Did he believe that I was trying to force myself on him, a hope that he would look beyond my plain face and see something more? I accepted that he was far more attractive then I could ever hope to be, but did that mean that our mingling together disrupted normal social discourse?

After what seemed like an hour his voice, as smooth as velvet filled the quiet room once again and I feared my knees would buckle as they had when I had opened the door to meet him at my house earlier that day. "I can stay with you, if you like, for a little while, until you fall asleep."

I merely nodded a response, worried that if I spoke aloud I would tell him that he shouldn't feel inclined to do so. I watched with a mixture of envy and awe as he stood up gracefully, almost as though, if one hadn't been watching, that the transition never existed, it just _happened_. I admired his stride, the elegant long strides that he took with ease and I wished that I could somehow be that confident in my gait. As he reached me, I felt his hand as it pressed against the small of my back and I took a sharp breath, which he must have misinterpreted because to my regret, he pulled it away, one hand motioning towards the stairs.

I would be lying if I said I wasn't thankful that he was behind me, his presence made me weak and I felt that at any moment I might fall backwards, but it was comforting to know that he would be able to catch me. As we reached the top of the stairs, I began to remember that he would know I hadn't bothered to get into the bed; it was still made, just as neatly as I had found it and when we entered I saw the confused look that he seemed to give me.

"Did you even get into the bed?" He grinned, his lips twisting into the crooked grin that I found so overwhelming.

I bowed my head slightly, afraid to meet his gaze as I realized how insane my reason was. "I didn't want to mess the bed up." He chuckled slightly, shaking his head.

"Bella you have to mess the bed up to get into it. How else did you expect to sleep?"

"I was just going to lie on the floor." I bit the side of my lip slightly as he continued to laugh, a light, gentle laugh. His hands began to pull the pillows from the bed and I fought the urge to protest though I knew it was no use, that he would continue to do it anyways.

"I will not have you sleeping on the floor." He stated, pulling the covers up and pointing towards it. "Go on… Get in." I did as he said and I felt my heart race as he pulled the covers over me, his face just inches from my own. I could smell the mint on his breath, could feel the warmth of his skin as it radiated onto my own and I did all I could to control my breathing, not wanting for a moment to give away my feelings. My feet kicked the book that I had sat on the bed and he reached over and picked it up, his hands touching the leather almost the same way that I had when I had picked it up, his face suddenly curious.

"Jane Eyre." His right eyebrow lifted slightly, as though he was mulling over my choice of literature. "A favorite of yours?"

"I studied English Literature at Stanford…"

"Are you implying that you have to study English Literature to appreciate the classics?"

"No…"

"I'm surprised that's all." He assured me, looking down at the page that I had been reading and contemplating. I looked at his face intently, trying to determine if I could learn anything from it. "Interesting place to stop."

"It's my favorite part of the book." I whispered.

"Close your eyes." Though I was sure he meant it as a demand, it seemed so far from it and I did as he asked, listening as he flipped through the book. I felt his weight as he sat beside me and I no longer heard his fingers searching the pages. His gentle voice began to speak again and I realized that he was reading from the book. I found myself smiling; I couldn't remember the last time anyone had read me a story in a means to help me sleep.

"'I will be your companion—to read to you, to walk with you, to sit with you, to wait on you, to be eyes and hands to you. Cease to look so melancholy, my dear master; you shall not be left desolate, so long as I live.' He replied not: he seemed serious—abstracted; he sighed; he half-opened his lips as if you speak: he closed them again. I felt a little embarrassed…" The story had never sounded so beautiful to my ears. So many times I had read it and it never had the same, spine tingling effect that his voice caused. I longed to open my eyes, but I could feel them on me, his intense gaze burning into my soul and I knew better, looking at him would merely cause my breathing to alter, my cheeks to blush, and give away everything that I was trying to hide from him. "I had indeed made my proposal from the idea that he wished and would ask me to be his wife: an expectation, not the less certain because unexpressed, had buoyed me up, that he would claim me at once as his own. But no hint to that effect escaping him and his countenance becoming more overcast, I suddenly remembered that I might have been all wrong, and was perhaps playing the fool unwittingly; and I began gently to withdraw myself from his arms—but he eagerly snatched me closer. 'No—no—Jane; you must not go. No—I have touched you, heard you, felt the comfort of your presence—the sweetness of your consolation: I cannot give up these joys. I have little left in myself—I must have you. The world may laugh—may call me absurd, selfish—but it does not signify. My very soul _demands_ you: it will be satisfied, or it will take deadly vengeance on its frame.'"

It was the last thing I remember hearing, and I drifted off to sleep, wishing that Edward Rochester's words, those that he spoke to Jane, had ceased to exist and it was merely Edward stating his love for me, never once thinking that it might have been true, that he had chosen to read from that page for a reason.

**EPOV**

Jane Eyre. I'm not sure why I was even that surprised, she seemed exactly like the kind of girl who would love stories such as those. It made me crazy though because it seemed to only add to the innocence that I found so appealing. My eyes glanced over the page that she was reading and I struggled to make sure my face did not pull into a grimace, I knew that page well, and I sympathized with Rochester, I knew exactly how he felt, especially as I stood in the room of this angel. I seemed to understand the inner struggle that he had, the feeling as though one is not good enough, that one's past decisions shape the future making someone incapable of the love of something so pure, so good. I was Rochester, though I wasn't sure my situation was quite the same. His first wife was crazy, he seemed to think his only option was to lock her up; I didn't have to punish James the way that I had insisted the criminal system did. Rochester was merely a tame version of myself, though my growing feelings for Bella appeared to be on par with Rochester's love of the innocent governess.

I sat down beside her on the bed, careful not to touch her, and careful to not to sit too close that I was tempted to lay with her. I began to read, and I as I did, I kept my eyes on her. The book was familiar, allowing me to read without always looking down at the page, giving me ample time to glance from the pages to her face. My fantasy of how she would appear as she slept was nowhere near close enough to do her justice. Her hair fanned over her, slightly obscuring her face from my view and I longed to reach forward and move it, but I refrained.

I continued to read though I heard her breathing change; I couldn't bring myself to leave her. After a few more pages had been read, I placed the book down, resting it on the bedside table, giving me an excuse to dip down slightly and inhale her intoxicating scent one more time. My feet carried me not to the door as they should have, but rather to the armchair and I sat there, feeling slightly disgusted with myself for not being able to leave, for staring at her like a peeping tom. The chair as close to the bed as I would have liked, but it was bearable, it helped that I couldn't smell her from here or feel the warmth of her body as I could while I was sitting on the bed.

She twitched slightly, her arm moving from under the cover and she tossed it above her head. Though she had looked so peaceful when I was sitting close to her, I couldn't help but notice that her sleep gave away her restlessness. I stood up, being so far away I could not see her like I wanted to, and as I leaned against the nightstand, I almost wished that I hadn't. Her face, the beautiful face that had looked so peaceful was now marred by the little furrow that had appeared between her eyebrows, and her lips were no longer smiling but rather trembling with an innate fear. I wanted, in that moment, to lay on the bed, to wrap my arms around her and make it go away.

"Did you ever love me?" She murmured.

My head jolted up as I realized that she was talking in her sleep and I was curious. Could this help me see more clearly into her soul? Into her mind? I felt the second wave of self-disgust of the night fill me, the thought of listening to her, to hear the thoughts I could not read on her face aloud in her state of unconsciousness was undeniably tempting. I needed to put more space between us, more space before I made a mistake. So I walked back to the chair and sat in it, still cursing myself that I could not just leave and retreat into my own room.

As I sat there, I began to contemplate my future, and a future that might include her. Was there anyway? Anyway that I could keep her as my own? Hurting her was unbearable and I feared that as soon as she learned the truth about me, that she would realize how much better off she was if I wasn't in her life. I could not hope to rival the other men in the world, those who would look at her and see the same innate beauty that I did. At least they were fully human, not marred with a past that haunted them, not filled with a parasite that sucked all the humanity out of them. How could she see me as anything more than a monster, it was how I saw myself. I was certain that if she saw me, saw the real me, that she would run away in horror, that I would repulse her, frighten her and that, in and of itself made me sick.

One day, somewhere along the road she would find someone, someone worthy of her. And though it pained me to think about it, I knew it was what was right. I was not the person she was destined to say yes to. It was someone else, someone who wasn't tortured and tormented like myself, someone who radiated a warmth that I no longer could. My heart was cold, cold and dead; her presence did warm it, though I knew it could never be enough, she needed someone who didn't need her to make them feel that way. One day she would met him and my jealousy would flare, though I knew that I could never bring myself to tamper with that, regardless of how much pain I would feel. Her feelings were far superior to my own, and if she was happy with whomever it is she would end up choosing, I would find a way to bear. She deserved happiness and love with whomever she chose.

I groaned inwardly, no one had ever caused this stir of emotions within me. For the first time since James' execution someone was attaching themselves to my heart strings and holding on tight. Though I knew it couldn't possibly be her conscious actions, I realized that I had to find a way to distance myself from her, to keep her on a strictly friends level because I could no longer pretend that I was only _in danger_ of loving her. Esme would have told me that it was okay, that it was normal and I deserved it, but I knew that Bella could never see me the way that I wished she would, the way Esme, Alice and Carlisle saw me. She could never see me any other way than how I saw myself, someone not worthy of love. I felt my heart break.

"Edward." She spoke again and I froze, my eyes moving to her face, to her unopened eyes.

My mind was racing with thoughts, had she woken and found me sitting there? The room was dark yes, but my name was spoken with such clarity that I wasn't sure. She still looked, still appeared to be sleeping and as I listened her breathing had not changed from the last time she had spoken. I heard her sigh, a quiet sigh before she turned again, rolling to her side, the side away from me. I realized that I had taken a single breath since she had spoken so I did, just as she spoke again.

"Edward." She was dreaming of me, and my heart raced with the thought. "Stay. Don't go. Please… don't go."

I felt myself unable to breathe again, downing in my own inability to breathe. Could it truly be? Could she really be dreaming pleasant thoughts? As I moved closer, I realized that her face had relaxed, the trembling of her lips had relaxed into a small, breathtaking smile and my heart felt hot, as though it was going to burn a hole straight through my chest. For so many years my life had been dark, unable to see anything but abject blackness and here she was, lighting my way. Could it be that the tug that I felt, the pull of my soul was because I was suppose to be with her? That she was my salvation?

I loved her. I had to admit it to myself so I did. I loved her and I would have to find a way to break free from this. For the first time I could not feel the monster that had become my constant companion, and as I tried to search for him, he seemed gone. Had this new love, had she, exorcised him from me? I closed my eyes and for the first time I could feel my body fill with a warmth that had not existed. I knew that I could not keep away from her, that I needed her in my life and I would have to find a way to do so. I would have to find a way to heal the inner demons and show her that I was worthy, because for the first time, I felt that maybe I was.

**A/N:**

**So I took a little more time on this chapter because I wanted to get it right and I actually am really pleased with how it turned out. I think it has a good mix of Bella's point of view as well as Edwards. Writing from Edwards's perspective is making me love him even more and it sucks haha. Anyways. I hope that you like this chapter as much as I do! My plan for the story was to follow some of the same patters as the original to maintain the integrity of the characters that Stephanie created so I hope I'm doing a good job of that. Like always, I want to thank everyone who continues to add this story to their alerts/favorites! And I want to thank those who took the time to review:**

**Twilightmoon20  
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**I can't wait to see what people have to say about this chapter! Enjoy!**

**And I hope that everyone has a great weekend! I'm super excited because I'm going to visit Forks this weekend at some point thanks for a four day weekend! I am hoping that it allows me to write in a manner that is true to the actual town! **


	10. Chapter 10

**Baby You Can Stop Running  
Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight… **

**Chapter Ten**

**EPOV**

I found that I didn't want to leave her room and I seemed to alternate from pacing the room (my legs allowed me to accomplish that feat in ten, long strides), standing above her, my eyes looking at her intently, pleading with her subconscious to speak again, and sitting in the chair, my eyes scanning over the pages of different books that Esme kept in the small book shelf. Her talking had subsided not long after her dream led her to me, her demands for me to stay, and I realized that staying with her hadn't been about listening to her but rather about being with her. The warmth continued to flare within my heart to the point where I couldn't imagine it never feeling that way again; I never wanted to feel the coldness again, never wanted to feel empty. My mind was still seemingly in awe that one person could cause such an earth-shattering change in my body.

I stayed until I could hear the rain pouring down, rapping against the glass loudly. She stirred and it caused me to sit completely still, hoping that my body was obscured, yet she didn't sit up, but rather signed loudly and pulled the blankets up over her head. For the first time that night, I was terrified that she would see me. It was really the last thing she needed, with everything that was happening in her life, did she really need to know that I was completely and totally obsessed with her? I cringed inwardly; it was easy to be disgusted with yourself when you were practically stalking an innocent person. I felt like a Lion, ready to pounce on his prey, the delicate lamb, innocent and completely unaware.

When I finally retreated to my room, I couldn't help but look around and feel that something was missing. The warmth that I had felt in her presence was not quite as strong when she wasn't around and that was a bit of a disappointment. Could I still feel this way if I was not under the same roof as her, if we were away from each other for a while? Still, my room felt lonely without her there, I felt lonely without her there. I knew that she was close, just on the other side of the wall, but it wasn't enough, I wanted more. This feeling was completely mind boggling to me, completely different from any other that I had ever felt before. There had been girls, girls in the past that seemed to satisfy the cravings when they came. It wasn't something I was proud of but when the pain became too unbearable, there was always someone around, and I took all I could but gave little in return. If I never let anyone get close, then I couldn't hurt them in return. It had caused problems in the past though, problems with Esme and Carlisle as one of the girls had been the daughter of a very close friend of theirs. Even to this day when the family came to visit around the holiday times I had to endure her company, ignoring the awkwardness and though usually I would end up using her, I was always angry with myself after the fact.

But Bella… Bella was different and I wasn't sure what it was exactly. Why her? Why did I feel like my body was on fire when she was around? Why could I never catch my breath? How did she make me feel like a completely different person? For the first time in my life I wasn't thinking about myself but rather about her, about what I could do to keep her safe, what I could do to make her happy, what I could do to be what she needed me to be, what I could do to have her in my life, because that was all I really wanted, there was no denying it anymore. I could never see myself doing to her what I did to all the others before her, I could never use her and toss her aside, she wasn't that type of girl. She was the kind of girl that you loved, the kind that you give your life for and I was prepared to do that if the situation ever rose.

Life and death… My thoughts shifted to James, to that night that changed my life forever, that made me into the miserable human that I was now. There are times when my memory of the night my parents were taken from me is more vivid than a movie, and other times when it is no more than a broken memory, pieces of it here and there, but nothing more than fuzz. Susan, my nanny had woke me up, her voice distraught though at the time I never would have pegged it for such, telling me that there had been an accident and my mother and father weren't going to be home and Carlisle and Esme would be here in the morning. Though I didn't know what was happening, I did know that it wasn't good, that the news that was going to be delivered come the following morning would be life altering, and it was. I can still sometimes remember the tears, the way the warm streaks felt as they ran down my cheeks when Esme held me in her arms and told me that my mom and dad were never coming back. I can remember the somber attitude of the funeral, so many had turned out, my parents had been well loved, but I hated all the people who came up to me, hugging me, telling me that it was going to be okay. How could they know? Had they ever experienced a loss such as that? When I went to bed that night, Alice, who had managed to escape from her crib, even then she was a bit on the trouble making side, had managed to climb into my bed and slept with me. I suppose she understood even if she was too young to really know, and I didn't want to be alone.

Esme and Carlisle had been the best thing that had happened to my life. Had it not been for them I surely would have been put through the system and not a day goes by that I'm not thankful for them. Still, I wish that they could have stopped me from seeking my revenge on James, had insisted, even though I was stubborn, to not go through with it, yet they never insisted, they let me make my own decisions. There had been a few times when they told me that it wasn't necessarily the best decisions and yet, I didn't listen to them, I thought it was the only way that I could find peace. I should have listened to them from the beginning; they have always known what was best for me. Still, I was angry with them for a time because they seemed to not care, to not want to enforce the full extent of the punishment that they could have on James, and I wondered, selfishly, if they even cared that my parents were gone. I know now that it isn't the truth but it didn't stop my fights with them, my hurting them for accusing them of the such. Still, they never turned their back on me when they easily could have, they never stopped loving me and they never stopped thinking that I deserved happiness, even though I did.

My eyes began to droop, but it didn't stop the questions from forming in my mind. Did James have a family, a wife, children, parents? Were they aware of what he had done, the pain that he had caused me, the life and blissful childhood that he took away from me? Did they know what I had done? Did they blame me as I blamed myself? For years, I had thought about finding them, writing them a letter to ask for my forgiveness. I wondered if I could ease my own guilt if they knew that I felt terrible for what I had done. Did they hate me as much as I hated myself? Or did they understand where I was coming from? I wondered if they hated me as much as I had hated James. Still, part of me was terrified that they might come after me if they were angry, what would be stopping them from seeking their own revenge? I would let them have it.

Exhaustion however took over before I could finish my thoughts and I found that my dreams were the only comforting part of the night. I had been plagued with nightmares for so many years that it took me by surprise that for the first time my dreams were not to be feared, but rather I welcomed them as she had a starring role. It was probably one of the reasons that I was so angry with Alice when she came into my room and jumped on my bed, effectively ending the dreams and waking me up when I had only been asleep for a few hours.

"Are you going to wake her up?"

"No." I grumbled, rolling over so my head was buried into the pillow.

"Okay, I will."

"No!" I said with more firmness, sitting up, my eyes still not fully open as I looked at her. I hated how much more of a morning person she was.

"Doesn't she have things that she needs to do?"

"She went to bed late." Alice cocked an eyebrow my way and I flushed. "No… Not like that."

"What did you do?" Her voice was almost demanding. "I really like her Edward and I swear if you fuck things up with her like you did with Tanya I'm going to murder you in your sleep."

"I thought you didn't like Tanya."

"It's not that I don't like her… I just never thought you were good for each other… But if you use Bella I swear I'll kill you."

"I'm not planning on using Bella. I'm not planning on doing anything to Bella." How long was I going to keep lying to myself?

"So what happened last night then?"

"I couldn't sleep so I went downstairs and played the piano for a bit and she came downstairs saying she couldn't sleep. I really don't know what happened last night at the bar so any information that you could tell me would be helpful, but she said she didn't want to be alone so I sat in the room until she fell asleep." I figured it best not to go into too much detail, like the fact that I couldn't leave right away, and that I stayed there until dawn.

"If you aren't planning on getting involved with her then why do you need to know what happened between her and her ex last night?"

"What do you want me to say Alice."

"That I'm right and that you love her."

"I can't possibly love someone I just met."

"Fine. Then you'll never know. I'm going to go get her clothes from the room and toss them in with the other laundry. She'll need new clothes so that just gives me an excuse to go shopping, if I take the Porsche I should get to Olympia in about an hour, hour and a half which would give me plenty of time to grab the clothes and be back with them if she went to bed as late as you say she did."

"Alright… I like her." I acquiesced and Alice smiled.

"It wasn't exactly what I was looking for but I'll settle for that." She laid down on the bed, her hands resting on her stomach before she launched into the conversation. "It was really loud in the bar so I couldn't really hear much, I know that she was really upset that he was there. He kept telling her that they needed to talk and she told him there was nothing left to talk about and how they were both really young and her disappearance was what he wanted. That was about all I caught."

"This is Jacob you're talking about?"

"I think that was his name, why?"

"Bella mentioned his name…" I felt my hands balling up into fists as I thought about everything that this guy could have done to her. I thought that the anger that I felt had subsided when I realized that she was okay, but for some reason, thinking about it, hearing what Alice was saying was not exactly helping. I was afraid that if I saw him in town that I might try and hurt him, even though I didn't know the entire story, didn't know what he really had done. I just knew that it had hurt her enough to never come back to Washington, enough to keep Emmett from calling her for two weeks, enough for him to think that she still wasn't even ready to be back here.

"I'm not sure, just don't do anything rash…" She warned as she stood up. "Are you going back to sleep?"

"No, I think you've already waken me up. I'll just take a shower and get dressed. I should call Emmett and let him know that his sister is here in case he is worried. Just hurry back from Olympia, I'm not sure when she will wake up and how kindly she will take to not having any clothes." Alice just nodded and walked out of the room leaving me to myself and the thoughts that I had taken over. I hoped that I could control myself if I ever ran into Jacob Black.

**BPOV**

I heard what sounded like a vacuum coming from the hallway and just as I was about to yell at Emmett for being so loud when I was obviously trying to sleep, I realized that Emmett would never be caught doing housework. It wasn't until I was sitting up in bed that I was confused as to where I was. It is always disorienting waking in a new place and it took a few moments before I remembered where I was and how I had ended up there. _Stupid Jessica Stanley_. It always boiled down to that. Had she not told Angela that I was in town again, I never would have gone to the bar, and I never would have seen Jacob and he never could have upset me as he had. I thought that I was over it, that after four years I could face him and tell him exactly how I felt, but I still couldn't do it. I knew better than ever that I no longer had feelings for him, how could I after what he had done to me? But there was still this anger festering deep within me that was bubbling out of control. Though, as I thought about all the possible places where the anger could stem from, it led to only one thing, hurt.

The room was pitch black, a combination of the curtains which obscured the window as well as what I assumed to be the rain clouds which kept the sun from peeking through. The bed was warm and I hated to pull myself from it but as I looked around I realized that there was not a single clock in sight. I pushed the bedding off my body and padded to the curtain, pulling it back to reveal that the sun was nearly completely above the earth, a sign that it was at least noon.

I felt the panic rise in my chest, Charlie had been expecting me this morning, Emmett had no idea that I went out, surely my truck wasn't at the house, would they think that I had thought better of being there and turned around and left them? I ran to where I had left my clothes only in their place was something I had never seen before, clothes that were clean but were not my own. As I gathered them in my hands I saw a piece of paper as it off the pile and I instinctively reached down and picked it up. Written on the top in perfect script, was my name.

_Bella,_

_Alice wanted to wake you this morning but having been aware of how late it was when you finally fell asleep I told her to leave you to sleep. I'm sure you are realizing that it quite a bit later than you had anticipated waking at but I have called Emmett to tell him where you were and not to worry. As for Charlie, I will stop by to see him when I check by the hospital to let him know that you haven't run off. Alice insisted that you needed clean clothes and laid some out for you, I'm terribly sorry, when it comes to things such as those I can't fight her. Your own were sent out to be cleaned and would not be back by the time that you would wake. There is also a clean town and a new toothbrush in the bathroom across the hall, feel free to clean up before you leave. Emmett stopped by Angela's and picked up your purse and keys which he dropped by and Esme and I retrieved your car from the bar. There is plenty of food in the kitchen if you are hungry, so don't be afraid to grab something._

_I hope to see you at the hospital.  
Edward_

I groaned slightly; a mixture of feelings swirling within my system, gratefulness that Edward had done what he had but also abhorrence that someone was doing all this for me. I was perfectly capable of taking care of myself and yet I felt as though things were such a mess and I had no clue where to go, what to do. I should be thanking him for his help though, not feeling angry with him for doing it. It had just been such a long time since I allowed someone to take care of me, and I wasn't sure that I could let someone do that.

I opened the door and walked across the hall to the bathroom and just as he had said, a clean town was sitting on the toilet and a new toothbrush with a small tube of toothpaste was sitting on the counter. I stripped his clothes off, taking a few moments to breath his scent from the shirt one last time before folding it neatly and placing it on the floor. The shower felt good, the warm water seemed to relax the muscles that were so tense from the night before. A wave of dread washed over me and I was afraid that I would see Jacob again, or, even worse, that he would show up at the hospital.

Charlie always loved Jacob, and he loved us together. Though I knew he would never admit it, I knew that it stemmed from the fact that he believed Jacob was what kept me in Forks and from going back to Renee. But I think it was more than that. Billy and Charlie had been friends for such a long time and though my early memories of Forks were vague, I had loathed the tiny town and tried to block out as much of those memories as I could, I could never help but think that it was what they had always wanted, Jacob and I to be together. The fact that Charlie had no idea what Jacob had done, what I had done was tearing me up but I was afraid that if I told him that I had been pregnant, that he was, kind of, a grandfather and that Jacob had asked me to have an abortion, he would never speak to Billy again. I couldn't take his best friend away from him, because even though I hated Jacob, I still cared deeply for his family.

I showered quickly and dried off, my hands touching the clothes that Alice had apparently pulled for me. I looked at the underwear and my mouth seemed to gape open. It was something that I would never, ever, pick for myself. The black bra was lacey to an extreme, and the underwear, though it was matching, looked as though it barely covered my own butt and it wasn't until I put it on that I realized how the bra pushed everything up higher than I liked which only made me feel even more self conscious as I pulled the midnight blue tee shirt on, which was low, and left absolutely nothing to the imagination. I pulled the jeans on, looked at myself in the mirror, and though the outcome wasn't nearly as bad as I thought it would be, I still didn't feel comfortable showing everything that this shirt did and it would have been nice if she could have at least left me with a tank top. I picked Edward's shirt and track pants from the floor and walked back to the bedroom.

I couldn't help but wonder if anyone was around and after I had placed the neatly folded clothes on the bed I slipped my feet into my shoes and grabbed the dark brown leather jacket. I would have put it on right away but the house was warm and I knew that I would over heat. As I carefully walked down the stairs, thankful that I hadn't tripped over my feet, I realized that I was alone in the house. I spotted my purse and keys and took them in my hand and ran out the door, I had to face Charlie today and I wanted to get it over with.

**A/N:**

**Totally not my best chapter and I apologize for it but I didn't really know what to write/how to write it, which also accounts for the shorter length, and the mindlessness of it… But I promise the next chapter will be better and to let you know what to expect, it will have a confrontation with Jacob (it's kind of up in the air if it will be between Bella and Jacob or Edward and Jacob) and I do INTEND to have Bella talk to Charlie about what happened that caused her to leave. So one way or another, there will be quite a lot of drama in the next chapter!**

**I'd also like to express my deepest thanks to everyone who continues to add this story! When I started writing it I never thought I'd get this amount of positive feedback which is one of the reasons I feel so bad about posting this chapter because it's defiantly not as good as I'd like it to be but I've kept everyone waiting for so long that I had to give you all something! I PROMISE the next chapter will be worth this crappy one!**

**I'd also like to thank those who took the time to comment! I was overwhelmed by how many there were this time and it made me so completely happy! Please continue to send them this way! It made my weekend!**

**SWChica2005  
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**All of you really made my weekend! So thanks again!**

**As for Forks, WA… I'm so glad I went! It was such a blast and I hope that everyone can get there at some point! I even saw a Silver Volvo which basically made my day (okay, it was old and not so shiny anymore but it was still a silver Volvo)! It was even more perfect because it was raining while I was in Forks and it was sunny when I went to LaPush… It was exactly as it should have been. We even went to the Italian restaurant in Port Angeles for dinner!**

**So I hope to have the next chapter up tomorrow or Thursday, I suppose it helps when I get a lot of feedback because I love knowing what people think but I hope to get something out to you all, something that is actually good, as soon as I can!  
**


	11. Chapter 11

**Baby You Can Stop Running**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight... Oh and the quote from Jane Austen's _Pride and Prejudice_ is obviously not mine either!  
**

**Chapter Eleven**

**BPOV**

I often wish that I could be as strong as Elizabeth Bennet. I've always felt this strong draw to her character and it was because of her that I fell in love with Jane Austen as a writer. Perhaps this draw stems from her ability to speak her mind with little regard for the consequences or perhaps there was a jealousy for the love of a man who from one angle is horrible but yet, after a scratching the surface is completely and utterly desirable, you know, if you're into that kind of thing. Which I'm not. But even with all her independence she was still able to let a man love her, and I wondered if I could ever do that too. After everything that had happened over the past four years, combined with my role in the house before I left, I had learned to rely on only myself, and it was something that I prided myself on, never needing anyone but myself. So what would happen to me if I let myself trust someone, let myself be with someone who wanted to take care of me? Could I abandon the person I had become out of habit and be the person who I could have been? Could I be happy?

As a child of a broken home, my view on relationships is a little more on the pessimistic side. I see Charlie, wasting away, still pining for the woman who left him so long ago because she felt stifled and I can't help but wonder if that is how all relationships end, one who walks away happy, and one who will remain broken hearted. And then, if I draw on my own experiences, well, I guess you can't blame me for feeling the way I do about everything. And I couldn't help but realize that Jacob had looked good, where as me, I was still just as broken as I had been when I left. Was I doomed to the same fate that Charlie lived, an inability to ever find love again, to pine for the same person for the rest of my life? No, because I don't love Jacob, not like that anyways, it just took a while to figure it out. Because, you see, if you love someone, you don't abandon them the way that he abandoned me, the way I abandoned him. Our relationship was never good for either of us because in the end we only ended up hurting each other while we both failed to take responsibility, I couldn't hide from that anymore, couldn't deny that I was at fault too, just in a different way.

My parents failed relationship had other implications on my life as well. Unlike so many of my other peers, I was forced to be responsible way before I ever should have needed to, I had to carry the weight of my family on my back, had to take care of them and myself. I had to if I was going to survive, if we were going to survive. When Charlie and Renee split, they divided Emmett and I, presumably, so neither would be lonely, but it appeared that they forgot how much he and I needed each other to get through it. I guess they both needed one of us, Charlie needed Emmett to stay strong after the love of his life walked out on him and Renee needed me to care for her. Living without Emmett was terrible, it was hard, but I dealt with it, and maybe I wouldn't love him as much as I do now if we hadn't been separated. It's a hard thing to explain really, but I think, in the end, it only made our relationship stronger.

Another reason why I've always felt so connected to Elizabeth Bennet probably had to do with my mother. Though it might be inconceivable that anyone could ever resemble Mrs. Bennet, my mom was similar to the modern version of her. I'm not saying that she was mad, crazy trying to find someone to marry me off to, but she eccentric, that's for sure. With Renee, I had to become the mother, I had to look after her to make sure that everything was okay, that we were okay. So I performed the motherly duties, the cooking, the cleaning, maintaining the household budget, and Renee did the things that I could never imagine doing, my own clumsiness and poor luck keeping me from ever doing anything that might get me killed. Still, she was my best friend and I would always love her, always need her in my life, just as I learned when I moved in with Charlie that I would always need him as well. I might have always been the adult in my familial relationships, but it never changed my feelings for them, never made me think less of them or blame them for making me grow up quicker.

There was another thing I admired about Elizabeth though, beyond her ability to love, and that was her ability to face confrontation. There was always something I adored about how she handled her situation with Lady Catherine de Bourgh the way her words put the old bag in her place, _"And I certainly never shall give it. I am not to be intimidated into anything so wholly unreasonable. Your ladyship wants Mr. Darcy to marry your daughter; but would my giving you the wished-for promise make their marriage at all more probable? Supposing him to be attached to me, would my refusing to accept his hand make him wish to bestow it on his cousin? Allow me to say, Lady Catherine, that the arguments with which you have supported this extraordinary application have been as frivolous as the application was ill-judged. You have widely mistaken my character, if you think I can be worked on by such persuasions as these. How far your nephew might approve of your interference in __his__ affairs, I cannot tell; but you have certainly no right to concern yourself in mine. I must beg, therefore, to be importuned no farther on the subject."_ I admired her, and longed to be her. I guess the only reason that I was thinking about it so much as of late was because I knew that I had to do something, that I had to face what had been following me and that involved confrontation. Still, telling Charlie about this was something I still didn't feel prepared to do, would he still love me if he knew? Would he still be able to look me in the eyes and see his little girl? I didn't know, and that scared me more than anything else.

I turned off Calawah Way, the long, country street that the Cullen's house was located on and began the drive towards the hospital. His scent still lingered in the cab of the truck and I couldn't figure out how that was possible, at least, that was until I turned my head and noticed that his leather jacket was sitting in the passenger seat, in his haste to get to work he must have forgotten it. I reached over and touched the soft, well worn leather and when I could no longer fight the urge to pull it to my nose, to breathe his intoxicating scent, I did just that. I only held it to my nose for a few moments, not wanting anyone to see me, as I realized just how crazy it would have looked. Well, at least I had an excuse to see him again this afternoon, to find him at the hospital, that is, if he was still there.

Charlie was sitting up in the bed when I got there, something he hadn't been able to do yesterday, so I assumed that that was a good sign. His eyes seemed to light up as I walked in and I hoped that even after what I had to tell him, he would still feel the same way. I smiled at him, dropping my purse on the chair before walking to sit beside him on the bed. I thought about taking the jacket off but I thought better of it, I would just bear the heat, I wasn't sure I would feel comfortable bearing so much skin.

"Hey dad." I smiled, leaning down and kissing his cheek.

"Hi sweetheart." He grinned and I noticed that he had more color in his cheeks. "Did you catch up on your sleep?"

"I did. How are you feeling?"

He shrugged slightly and I noticed the wince as he did. "Better, I suppose." I looked down at the blanket, trying to figure out where I was going to start, how I was going to tell him.

"There's something you need to know… The reason why I left."

"It doesn't matter, you're home."

"No, it does matter because I can't keep hiding this… I'm just afraid that you'll think less of me."

"That's impossible, you are my daughter, my baby, and nothing you could say could ever change that."

"Are you sure?" I looked up and pulled my hands from the blanket that I was twisting with my fingers.

"Bella, I'm sure… What's wrong? What is it?" I could tell that he was growing anxious and I knew I couldn't put it off any longer.

"I didn't leave because I wanted to get out of here, and I know that's probably what you thought, with your experience with mom and all. And, I hate that I hurt you like that, that I made you think I resented you, that I resented being here… I just." I paused for a moment and looked down, finding the words that I needed was harder than I could ever have imagined. "I got pregnant… And before you say anything let me finish. I had intended to stay, but when I went to tell Jacob well… He didn't take the news like I thought he would and he wanted to give me money for an abortion, but you see, it was in that moment that I realized that I couldn't go through with it."

There was a knock on the door and I turned to see Jacob standing there, his large frame obstructing the doorframe. As I turned to plead to Charlie to not say anything I saw the darkness in his eyes, his anger towards the man who just walked in. This was everything that I wanted to avoid, I didn't want him to think less of Jacob, I just wanted him to know the truth. I shook my head and touched Charlie's hand, my unspoken desire for him to remain quiet, to not say anything, that I wasn't done telling my story but I couldn't tell him with Jacob there.

"What are you doing here Jacob?" I asked, standing up and moving towards him.

"I went to your house but you weren't there, I wanted to talk to you."

"So you thought coming to the hospital was a good idea did you?" I asked, I could hear the harsh tone of my voice but I didn't care, he should have known better than to come here. I pushed him out the hall and closed Charlie's door, this wasn't something I wanted him to hear.

"I had to talk to you Bella."

"No Jacob, what part of I don't want to talk to you right now don't you seem to understand?" I was doing all I could to keep my voice level and low, not wanting to cause a huge scene, if I did it would be all over town in a matter of hours.

"Come on Bella. What do you want me to say?"

"I want you to stay away from me for a while. It was wrong of you to come here, to come to the hospital."

"I know and it's not something that I'm proud of but what other option did you leave me with? You didn't come home last night…" He looked up from the floor and straight into my eyes. "Where were you?"

"I don't think that's really any of your business anymore Jake." I sighed. "Listen, when I'm ready to talk I'll find you, but I think it would really be best if you just stayed away, I have enough to deal with as it is and the last I need is you around."

"You always liked my company before."

"Jake…" I whispered. "Please don't do this."

"Is there a problem?" His musical voice broke through the silence, through the tension that was filling the hall and I could hear my heart as it started to race in my chest as it always did when he was close. Before I could turn to look, his hand was on my shoulder and electric currents seemed to flood my system. I wondered if Jacob had noticed, if he could see how my body reacted to Edward's presence. As my eyes fell on him I could feel the air leave my lungs and my heart skip a few beats. He looked amazing and I wondered how that was possible, it wasn't like he could have gotten that much sleep as he went to be after me and was up way before me.

"No, it's okay Edward." I said softly. "Jacob was just leaving; he never should have come here to begin with." I turned from Edward to meet Jacobs eyes, noticing their questioning. "Please leave Jake… When I'm ready to talk I'll find you but please don't come back here, don't go looking for me… It's only going to make things worse." I didn't want to be there anymore and as I walked away I felt Edward's hand as it slipped from my shoulder, the electric current now gone, and only a reminder was the tingles that still lingered where his hand had sat.

I closed the door behind me, my way of telling them not to come in, telling them that I needed to be alone with Charlie, I needed to finish what I had already started.

"What's going on Bella?" Charlie's voice was harsh but I knew that it was only out of concern. "What is going on with you and Jake?"

"That's what I'm trying to tell you… Will you let me finish before talking?" I asked, walking towards the bed and taking my place once again, I wanted to met his eyes but I didn't have the courage to do it. I did however feel his hand as he placed it on mine, and it caused me to look up and see that he was nodding his head. "When I found out that I was pregnant, it was about two months before I had to leave for Stanford. I tried for about a month to hide it, but I finally told Jacob and he merely said that I should take care of it, that he would go with me and he would help pay for it. It was never my intention to keep it, I knew that I couldn't give it a life that it deserved and there were things that I still wanted to do with my life, things that I would never be able to do if I had a child. The thing is, his reaction wasn't what I had thought it would be and it broke my heart because I thought that he loved me… I never would have done what I had if I thought otherwise, but he was so cold, so distant and it hurt. So I left him on the beach and I came home and I waited that entire month to hear back from him but I never did and Emmett knew what was going on, he was the only one… I was afraid to tell you because I was afraid of what you might think about me, how disappointed you would have been in me so when I left for school, I deferred my acceptance for a semester and had the baby." I looked up at him to see if I could read his face but I couldn't and it frustrated me. "I gave her up for adoption… In case you were wondering, and I know it was the right thing to do, her life will be better because I gave her to someone who can give her everything that she will ever need. Still, it doesn't ease the pain completely, and I still think about her, still love her, but I know that she will never be mine."

"Bella…" His voice was soft and I looked up only to realize that I was crying, that warm tears were streaking down the sides of my cheeks at a rate that made wiping them away pointless, so I let them fall.

"I tried to come home for Christmas and I made it as far as the SeaTac airport when I realized that I couldn't do it. I left without telling anyone because I was afraid of what the town might say, how I would have brought disgrace to your name and that was something I couldn't bear to do, and I didn't come back because I couldn't face Jake… Above everything else you need to know that it wasn't because I didn't love you, that I didn't love Emmett, but rather I didn't think I was strong enough to face Jake again."

I felt Charlie's hand on my cheek, his thumb brushing away a few tears. "Bella, you are stronger than anyone else I know. I can't imagine what it would have been like to carry this weight on you, to keep it to yourself… I hate that you couldn't tell me, that you thought I would think less of you. Stuff happens, but you handled it the only way you knew how, and even though I wish you had told me… I guess I understand. But it doesn't make me love you less. If anything, I love you more for it. One day, you'll have a child on your own terms, with someone who deserves you. I always liked Jake but he failed to be there for you when you needed him, and that is unforgiveable. He should have stepped up and been the man that you needed him to be. I guess I'm disappointed in him, I thought he was raised better than that."

"Please don't take it out on Billy… It would kill me if it ruined your friendship with him."

"Bella… I won't even mention this to him. That's Jakes responsibility." Charlie said softly, his eyes beginning to droop with exhaustion. "But Bells…" I looked up again and I could see the softness in his eyes. "I know I may not say it much, and that might have something to do with the way I was raised, but I do love you, and all I want is what is best for you."

"I love you too dad." I smiled slightly through my tears, leaning down to place a kiss on his cheek. "You should get some more rest. I need you to pull through for me, for Emmett. I'll be back later." It didn't take any more persuading, he was asleep by the time I pulled away and for the first time, I felt a little better, as though part of the heavy load that I had been carrying was lifted.

**EPOV**

I knew how wrong it was to listen to her conversation but as I turned the corner and heard her voice, I knew I couldn't stop myself. I was drawn to her just as I had been last night and all I wanted to know was what she was thinking, what she was going through. What Alice had told me didn't even come close to giving me a fraction of the information that I knew I needed. Yet, as my eyes found her, I saw for the first time, a recognizable emotion, pain, and I figured that it had something to do with my own pain, it was a look I knew well.

She stood there in front of a tall, russet skinned man. Though I couldn't see his face, I knew that this had to have been Jacob, her ex boyfriend who had confronted her at the bar. I could hear their conversation, could hear her pleading with him to leave.

"Is there a problem?" I found my mouth talking before I had the chance to stop it and my hand moved to her shoulder in a possessive move. Though I knew she didn't want to see him, I almost wanted to make him regret hurting her as he must have done to make her this upset, and I wanted him to know that there were others out there who would do anything to make her happy. Truth be told though, what it really came down to was my own selfish desire to touch her, to feel her smooth, creamy skin against my hand. I locked eyes with him and though he was taller than me, I knew that if he threatened me, or if he hurt her again, my feelings towards this girl that I barely knew would be enough to help me beat him; she would make me stronger than anything else ever could.

Still, I could see the anger flare in his dark eyes, and I found that I was narrowing my own in an instinct to let him know that he should leave her alone, that he was done hurting her. I watched as he balled his hands into fists and I kept my hand secured on her shoulder, trying my hardest to ignore the wave of electric currents that seemed to jump from her body into mine. Still, I couldn't help but wonder if she felt them too or if it was only my desperate want of her, my lust that created it.

"No, it's okay Edward. Jake was just leaving; he never should have come here to begin with." Her voice was even though quiet and I fought the urge to move my hand down to her back, to rub small, soft, comforting circles against it. I just wanted her to know that I cared, that I wanted to be there for her if she needed it. She had asked for a friend and I figured that it wouldn't have been too suspicious, but still, I didn't want to push her, especially as she seemed to be dealing with heavy ex boyfriend issues. "Please leave Jake… When I'm ready to talk I'll find you but please don't come back here, don't go looking for me… It's only going to make things worse." She pulled away, not waiting for him to respond and closed Charlie's door behind her.

Jake however, didn't move, he merely continued to glare at me, fire burning in his eyes.

"I think she asked you to leave." I finally spoke.

"No one was talking to you."

"As a doctor in this hospital, I have the authority to have you escorted out. Bella asked you to leave, I think you should respect her wish."

"You don't know what you are getting yourself into."

"What does that mean?"

"It means that Bella and I will get back together, that we belong together… She's just a stubborn girl but she'll see that it was all just a misunderstanding."

I found my own hands balling into fists at the thought of him trying to win her over. Surely she wouldn't… True I had no idea what had happened between them, but I knew that whatever it was had affected her deeply and only a masochist would put themselves through that… Right?

"I don't care what you think… She asked you to leave and I think you should, she's been through enough today." I watched as he looked towards the door, and I moved myself towards it, blocking the handle before he had the chance to go in. "I'll call security right now." I wanted to do more than that, I wanted my fist to make contact with his face and I wanted it to hurt, but I also knew that I couldn't do it here, that hurting him in my hospital would only get me fired and that wasn't something I wanted.

"I'll leave but I'm not going to disappear from her life, so you better be willing to fight for her because I'm not giving up that easily."

"What makes you so sure that she wants you to fight for her? What makes you think that she could possibly still care for you."

"The only thing that matters is that she isn't apathetic towards me, because then she wouldn't care at all. She obviously still has some feelings for me so that's really all I need to know."

"Stay away from her… If I find out otherwise."

"You'll what?"

"Just stay away from her." He laughed a low guttural laugh that made me cringe.

"I'll be back."

"Not when I'm here." I called towards his retreating back, my eyes taking in the smug wave that he tossed in the air before he pushed through the doors to leave.

**A/N: So obviously things are going to heat up between Jake and Edward with them both vying for her affections though we all know who will end up winning out… Haha. But there is going to be a slightly bigger twist that will be taking place in one of the upcoming chapters, so get excited… It will be following the Twilight plotline though so I mean, it might not be that big of a twist… **

**Once again, thank you all for adding this story to your alerts/favorites! You all make my day! I hope that you liked the new chapter!**

**Special thanks to my reviewers:  
edwardsbaby4eva  
SWChica2005: I totally probably never would have gone if my college wasn't in WA and so close, but if you ever do get to WA, you should take the time to go there. It's a small town but La Push is beautiful!  
bellestormes  
CallalillyAngel  
Tulips at Twilight: Thanks for pointing that out! I went back and made the changes… I've been doing so much writing with mid terms and all that jazz that I've gotten really lazy about proof reading so again, thank you for pointing it out, I completely agree, it messed with the flow a lot!  
Dark as night bright as day  
MeghanCullen  
bloodredeclipse  
FRK921  
rocnrollperson  
momma2three  
wingedvamp1107  
rainpuddle13  
Luvntwilight  
greenbuttonsx  
TwiWriter15: James is actually going to fade into the background for a bit… Until he talks about it with Bella really… He's going to start focusing on his feelings for her and though the trouble that is coming up will be because of James, he obviously is dead so it won't be him, though it will be related… It was really the only reason I brought it up in chap 10… It was just a slight foreshadowing…  
tiny31792**

**Thank you all for your wonderful comments! I can't wait to see what people have to say about the new chapter! You all make me so motivated to continue writing this story!**

**Preview: Bella and Edward are going to talk and she is going to thank him for intervening. I see a trip to Port Angeles soon… With some of the same things happening that happened in the book, which means we are going to have Edward reveal his feelings towards her very, very soon… I still want to keep to the cannon as much as I possibly can, even though they are human.**


	12. Chapter 12

**Baby You Can Stop Running  
Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight… It all belongs to Stephanie Meyer, I just borrowed from her genius. **

**Chapter Twelve**

**EPOV**

My office seemed cold when I opened the door and for some reason something just felt off, it was as though something crucial was missing and my body ached for it. As I walked in my eyes surveyed the room desperately trying to seek out the cause of my newfound anxiety, though not so much as a book had been touched and still resting on the top of the mahogany desk was Bella's file, the file I took when I learned her name after stitching up her chin. It was wrong I knew, to take it, to want to thumb through it and learn of every ache, pain, cut, bruise, broken bone and stitch that had ever brought her to this hospital. I hoped though that if I learned about her medical records it would allow me to understand her more, to be able to look at her beautiful face and read her. It was infuriating that I could never figure out what it was that she was thinking. After so many years spent studying human emotions, for lack of anything better to do, I always thought of myself as an expert, by why didn't my gift apply to her, when she was now the only one I wished that I could understand.

Without thinking, my hands reached down to touch the thick paper of her folder, my fingers wrapping around the edges and picking it up off the desk. I collapsed into the large leather chair and pressed my head firming against the back of it, my head fighting the heart's desire to flip through the thick folder. Would I be betraying her trust if I did this, if I went through her file without her permission to soak up as much information as I possibly could? Inside my body was in the midst of a battle, my heart which thirsted to know as much about her as possible, and my head which told me it was wrong, that even thinking about getting to know this girl on that kind of level was a bad idea. My brain however waved the white flag of surrender, my heart obviously winning out.

She was born here at Forks Community Hospital on September 13, 1987, effectively making here a mere twenty-two years old. That fact, in and of itself was surprising to me as she acted much older than she was. She weighed in at a healthy seven pounds, five ounces, delivered via c-section. I thumbed a few years forward, she broke her arm when she was five, and the report said that she had fallen from the slide at the local school. Three weeks after that she had stitches to her nose, apparently she ran into a tree. I felt a small chuckle develop as I realized that grace was something she had never acquired, and it was endearing. I flipped through a few more pages only to find that many of the records had been acquired from two very different hospitals, one that was located in Riverside, California and another from Phoenix. Still, in each location she had managed to either, break a bone or need stitches. I couldn't help but wonder if anyone had been looking out for her when these incidents happened. I closed the folder and tossed it back on the desk, information should come little by little, and I didn't want to overwhelm myself.

I closed my eyes and my mind instantly transported me back to the hallway that I had been in this afternoon and in that instant I began to feel uncomfortable. The anger slowly coursed through my veins as I thought about Jacob, thought about how he had upset Bella and it bothered me more than I would like to admit. It was her eyes, the look in her eyes that caused this stir of anger within myself. They were pleading, scared, angry and I knew that all I wanted was to make it go away, to make him go away. My thoughts flashed to the pictures that I had seen of her in Charlie's house; they were of better times and I could bet that her eyes hadn't sparkled the way they did in those pictures since she left Forks. That, in and of itself, seemed like a travesty. The door opened, startling me as I had not been expecting it.

"Edward, what are you doing here today? I told you to take the weekend off." Carlisle spoke, my eyes flying open to see him as he closed the door and made his way into my small office. He walked towards the desk, taking a seat in one of the unoccupied chairs that I used to meet with patients families.

"I wanted to check on Charlie." I replied, motioning to the other file on the desk. His eyes wandered towards it and I realized that he caught sight of the other, the one that read Isabella Marie Swan in big, bold lettering.

"I should reprimand you for that." His voice was low and quiet. There was no need for him to tell me what it was he was talking about, I knew exactly what he meant. I had broken a rule when I took Bella's file, and what made it even more sick was that I was using it to get to know her better, and Carlisle knew that. He sighed before continuing, "But I won't, your mother would kill me. I don't think I've ever seen her so excited about one of her children forming a relationship. Still, don't let anyone see that."

"I won't… But, there isn't a relationship there, I gave her stitches yesterday and I needed to write it up."

"Sure…" He replied the concern in his voice all but gone and I couldn't help but notice that he seemed rather carefree about the situation. "How is the girl this afternoon?"

"I don't know actually. She was asleep when I left the house and I haven't really seen her yet."

"That's not what I've heard."

"What did Ms. Stanley say exactly?" The hospital gossip must have witnessed the exchange between Jacob and myself.

Carlisle chuckled, his head shaking from side to side lightly. "I'm afraid you've been here too long if you already know that Ms. Stanley is the town gossip."

"Come on dad, that was something I was able to spot my first few days here. Didn't she have to sign a confidentiality agreement? How does she keep that big mouth of hers shut when it comes to patient care but when it comes to people's personal lives she just runs her mouth?" His chuckle turned into a full out laugh.

"It's a small town, word would get out eventually anyways."

"So what did she say exactly?"

"She just mentioned something about Billy Blacks boy dropping by and that Miss. Swan was clearly upset about it and that you swooped in and rescued her… And something about a confrontation with the boy?"

"I just told him to leave, that Bella… Miss. Swan had asked him to leave and I would call security if he didn't comply with her wish."

"So nothing about telling him to stay away from her?" My cheeks burned with embarrassment. "Edward, don't be so hard on yourself, she is a lovely girl and quite frankly, I couldn't be more thrilled that someone is finally pulling you out of your self-imposed condemnation."

"We're just friends." I stated.

"Why do you torture yourself like this?"

"I just don't think I deserve her, she's too perfect."

"Edward, there isn't such thing as perfection, you're making excuses."

"Because when I allow myself to love someone they either end up dead, or I end up hurting them."

"You have never hurt us."

"Really? I sure remember pretty clearly how horrible I was to both you and mom when I was in college."

"You were having a rough time, we've never took what you said all that seriously." I wasn't going to budge and Carlisle knew it. "Just think about it… We've never seen you this happy Edward and it's nice to see."

"I'll think about it." I replied, just as a knock on the door caused Carlisle's eyes to shift.

The door opened slowly as Carlisle stood up to leave and as he opened the door wider, I watched and took her in. I very rarely allowed myself to think of anything more than her face but the clothes that she wore made it hard to not notice the curves of her body. The jeans were tight; clinging to her small hips and ran straight down to her small feet. Her shirt, the dark blue made her already light skin look even creamier than usual and seemed to put a soft glow, and though I tried hard not to, my eyes couldn't help but notice the plunging neckline of the shirt. I made a mental note to thank Alice for her wardrobe choices for Bella.

"Oh, I'm so sorry, I didn't realize I was interrupting anything." Her soft cheeks flushed a bright and alluring shade of red and she chewed nervously on her lower lip.

"Oh nonsense." Carlisle smiled. "I was just leaving anyways. I trust you slept well last night?"

"I did thank you." She smiled a small, soft smile, and I imagined what her full lips would feel like against my own. _Get a grip Edward._ "I'm so sorry for causing such an inconvenience."

"You apologize more than Edward… I wasn't sure that was possible." He chuckled. "I hope to see you around more often Miss. Swan. Please send my warmest wishes to your father and brother; they are both a pleasure to see around the hospital. Charlie as great determination and I'm certain that with Edward's care he will recover quite well."

"Thank you Dr. Cullen."

"Please, call me Carlisle." She nodded and he turned to face me. "Edward, I'm afraid if you don't leave this hospital I will have no other option then to kick you out and put you on probation. Get some rest; I cannot have tried doctors running around this hospital trying to help my patients."

"I'll leave in a few minutes dad." I smiled and he left, closing the door behind him leaving me alone with her. I could smell her in the air, and I focused as hard as I could to keep my eyes from rolling backward. Her scent was intoxicating and unlike anything I had ever been around before. It caused my blood to stir in a way that no other woman had ever been able to do. I quickly brought myself back to reality and as carefully and inconspicuously as I possibly could, I covered her file with another, not wanting her to know that I had been doing some research on her. Clearly, behavior would frighten her and send her running for the hills, which, in all reality, was probably something she should be doing anyway.

"I'm really sorry about that." She blushed again.

"You didn't interrupt anything important; he was merely reprimanding me for coming here on my day off. I work too much and it really isn't a good thing." My eyes met her own and I felt the hair on my body stand up as chills ran through my body, what was it about her that caused this in me? "How are you?"

"I just wanted to thank you for helping this afternoon. And for last night. I really do appreciate everything you've done. I feel completely indebted to you, and Alice."

"Well, then come have lunch with me." The words escaped my mouth before I had the chance to stop them and I saw her body freeze with my suggestion.

"I really should get back to the house, I'm sure Emmett will be wondering where I've been."

"Then let me walk you to your car." She smiled and I turned my computer off, picked up my bag and fell into a stride next to her.

We walked in silence and I watched as she pulled the jacket over her delicate shoulders, struggling for a minute as she seemed to tangle herself up. The rain was pouring down and I cursed myself for having forgotten an umbrella so I could hold it over her, so I could keep her dry. As we walked out the door, I watched as she looked up and closed her eyes, allowing the rain to hit her face, something that most girls would never do. _Odd. _I wondered what she was thinking as a smile, a small breathtaking smile played on her lips.

"Thanks…" She said as we approached her truck and I couldn't help but notice how quickly she was trying to move now. Her key was in the door of the truck in a matter of moments and she was safely inside. I found myself leaning against the side of the truck, my eyes peering through the glass window watching as she reached across the seat and handed me the jacket I purposely left there this morning, my reassurance that I would have to see her again.

"I think you left this in here." She smiled and I took it from her hands.

"I'm sorry about that." I lied, and watched as she put her key in the ignition and turned it, the car only sputtering in response. "Are you sure I couldn't persuade you to join me for lunch?" I found myself hoping that she would reconsider and I watched as her face contorted, as though she was trying to find a way to let me down easy.

"I'm really not that hungry." Her soft, musical voice spoke though I heard the rumble of her stomach.

"It appears that your stomach has betrayed you." I replied as the right side of my lip curled into a half smile. Her body froze with my words and my mouth continued to speak trying to make her comfortable again. "But if you really are looking for an excuse to not come I'll let you go anyways." My tone was low, afraid that I was giving her the out that she wanted.

"Okay…" She replied, pulling her key from the ignition to look at me. "Where to?"

"I'll drive." I grinned.

"I'm perfectly capable of driving myself if you would tell me where we are going." I merely continued to smile as I reached forward and opened the door of her car, my hand gripping onto the soft leather of the jacket she wore. True, she could have driven if she wanted to, the truth was, I didn't want her to leave me, I wanted to spend more time in her company, and in all honesty, it gave me an excuse to touch her.

"I wouldn't dare let you drive in your condition." I replied my voice giving away my good humor.

"And what condition would that be exactly?" She responded, her body sliding out from the car before she closed it, the slam making a few flecks of rust sprinkle down to the wet ground.

"Hunger… With your luck you'd probably veer off the side of the road due to your stomachs protests and we couldn't let that happen now could we?" I kept my hand on her though I moved it from her arm to her back, pushing her carefully toward my car.

"Let go!" She demanded and I did, just as we reached the back of the car, I pressed the button on the key and heard the click of the locks. "You're so pushy!"

"It's open." I replied, opening my own door, sliding into the driver's seat. I watched her body, perhaps I had been a bit too harsh, had been too forceful as her body was rigid and her eyes darted around the parking lot as though she was contemplating her escape. Luckily enough for me, I knew how clumsy she was, I could easily catch up to her and drag her back. I rolled down the window and leaned closer to it. "Get in Bella." I watched her eyes narrow with my demand and it only pushed me further. "I'll just drag you back."

I heard her sigh with acceptance and I smiled, enjoying the indignant look on her face. She was stubborn that was certain, but it seemed to be part of the draw, the challenge. I could hear the squeak of her feet along the rubber mats that protected the floor of the vehicle and her wet leather jacket made a small noise as well as it brushed against the light grey leather of the car. I turned the heater on, she was wet and presumably cold and my eyes traveled to her face quickly, noting the way her lower lip jutted out in a pout. It didn't last long though, she relaxed a few moments later and that bought a warm feeling deep within me.

"Clare de Lune?" She questioned, turning to look at me as I pulled out of the hospital parking lot.

"You know Debussy?"

"Kind of, only my favorites really. My mom use to play his music when I lived with her in Phoenix."

"It's one of my favorites too…" I smiled inwardly at the surprise of her musical tastes and I began to wonder if I might play it for her. I glanced at her though the side of my eye and noticed that she had relaxed more, her body not as rigid as it had been when she first got into the car. I began to wonder what else she might reveal to me, what else might surprise me about her, though it seemed everything about her was surprising.

**BPOV**

The drive to the restaurant was short and though I had protested, it was merely because of how nervous I was around him. There were quite a few people at the small diner, more than I had anticipated for a Saturday afternoon, and as I looked around, I saw Jessica and Mike at a nearby booth and looked away quickly, not wanting them to see me, to stir up any more problems.

"You miss your mother." He said it as a question though it came out more as a statement, and for a moment, I couldn't even understand what had brought him to bring the subject up, but then I remembered the conversation in the car.

"I do…" I replied hearing the hint of sadness in my voice. "She's my best friend."

"What is she like?" He seemed to be interested, though I was still unsure as to if he just was trying to make small talk. His eyes were locked in on me however, studying me with a curiosity that I had never known before and I could feel the blush creep into my cheeks.

"She looks like me, but much prettier." He raised his eyebrows and I looked down. "I have too much Charlie in me. She's more outgoing than I am, and braver. She's irresponsible and slightly eccentric, and she's a very unpredictable cook."

"Why did you move to Forks to begin with?"

"I guess it was mainly because she was unhappy and I did miss Charlie and Emmett. But mainly because of my mom. It had been us for so long and when Phil came along… I guess it was weird for a while, him being so much younger than her but he made her happy and that made me happy but when he started to travel because of his team and she had to stay behind with me I could tell that she missed him." I stopped for a moment as the server brought our plates and set them down, his eyes still did not leave my face. "It was easier that way, she could be with Phil and be happy, and even though I hated the rain, I'd be back with Emmett and Charlie."

"That was generous of you." He smiled warmly and I began to pick at the food in front of me. "How old are you Bella?"

"Twenty-two."

"You don't seem twenty-two." I watched as his eyes glanced towards Mike and Jessica.

"My mom always says I was born thirty-five years old and that I get more middle-aged every year." I laughed before a sigh escaped my lips. "I guess someone had to be the adult."

He merely nodded and took a bite of his sandwich. I watched with an intense curiosity as his teeth bit into it, his full lips curling around the outside. My heart began to race and I was thankful that his eyes were closed momentarily; it gave me a chance to look down, which I did, trying to expel any thoughts of his lips from my mind. I followed suit a few seconds later, taking a bite of my own sandwich.

"Do you approve of Phil?" His voice was curious.

"Does it matter?" I replied after swallowing. "I've only ever wanted her to be happy and he is who she wants. You can't really help that."

"I wonder..." He mused, my attention now on him completely, the rest of the diner seemed to have disappeared in the background as my heart raced with anticipation.

"What?"

"Would she extend the same courtesy to you, do you think? No matter who your choice was?" His eyes were intent and serious as they met my own and I couldn't help but wonder what it was he was trying to say. How anyone could ever consider him scary was beyond my own understanding, he was a doctor, had a well respected family, was beautiful to look at… He surely couldn't be thinking that he was scary.

"I-I think so…" I stuttered, suddenly aware that his eyes were still staring at me and he had barely blinked at all. "But she's the parent, after all. It's a little bit different."

He smiled wryly. "No one too scary then."

"What do you mean by scary? Multiple facial pricings and extensive tattoos?"

"That's one definition I suppose." He grinned as he brought one hand to his hair and ruffled it slightly.

"What's your definition?"

His face, the one that only minutes before had been smiling was now serious. "Do you think I could be scary?"

I sat back in the seat, my eyes appraising him. "I think you could be if you wanted to be."

"Are you frightened of me now?"

"No." I didn't think twice, I still couldn't imagine why he could think I would think that. It was true that he wasn't open, he wasn't someone who seemed to let people in. I recalled the conversation I had with Jessica and Angela at the bar, my questioning of him, and their inability to provide me with and conclusive answers, just that he was of a more 'brooding' nature, and seemingly cut off from the world, though he was always kind with his patients.

"So, are you going to tell me about your family?" I probed before taking another bite.

"What do you want to know?" His voice was cautious, as though he was afraid he might reveal too much.

"The Cullen's adopted you?"

"Yes."

I hesitated for a moment, his response had been short and curt and I was afraid that I was opening up wounds that he might have been trying to close for many years now. It was a feeling I knew all too well, still I was only beginning to learn that closing them only caused more bleeding when they were reopened, that they had to be healed and the only way of healing them was by talking about it. "What happened to your parents?" My voice was soft and low.

"They died a very long time ago." His voice was unemotional as though he had closed off the feelings a long while ago and I felt guilty, sorry, for bringing it up.

"I'm sorry."

"I really don't remember them that clearly. Carlisle and Esme have been my parents for a long time now."

"And you love them?"

He smiled softly, and it made my stomach flutter. "Yes. I couldn't imagine two better people."

"You're very lucky." I replied, a small smile of my own appearing on my face.

"I know I am."

"And you sister?"

"Alice is a product of Carlisle and Esme, though she was very young when I came to live with them so she doesn't see me as her adopted brother but rather as her own flesh." I noticed that his plate was now barren and that mine was still almost completely full. "You should eat."

We didn't talk the rest of the time, I merely sat there and finished what I could. I was nervous as I felt his eyes on me and I began to wonder what was going on in his head, what he was thinking about. He paid the bill before I could even object to it and we were out the door and in his car shortly after. All the while, I couldn't help but wonder why he didn't want to speak about his family. He had been so sure as to cut me off that it almost startled me. Still, I figured it best not to press him on the issue, if we truly were friends, it would be something that I hoped to learn eventually, we had, after all, only known each other for two days.

He pulled into the hospital parking lot, and into the empty parking spot next to my own truck. I opened the door and began to get out in an attempt to leave the uncomfortable silence that had fallen between us in the car. However, I tripped as I tried to get out of his car and it elicited a light chuckle from him which made my cheeks burn.

"Have a good weekend." He smiled, leaning over as I stood back up, my hand on the door.

"Won't I see you tomorrow?" I couldn't help but hide my disappointment that he wouldn't be at the hospital, that I wouldn't see him or be able to speak to him even though this conversation had ended awkwardly.

"No. Jasper and I are going out of town."

"What are you going to do?" I worried for a moment that I had overstepped a boundary again, but it was a plausible question, something a friend might ask. We were, after all, friends.

"We have to go to Seattle for a few days." I found myself frowning slightly at his statement, it hadn't told me really what I had been asking but I knew I'd have to settle for it.

"Oh, well, have fun." My voice was disappointed though I tried to sound enthusiastic.

"Will you do something for me this weekend?" He asked as I was about to close the door causing me to do a double take. With my surprise, I couldn't speak and merely nodded an agreement.

"Don't be offended, but you seem to be one of those people who attract accidents like a magnet. So… try not to hurt yourself? I won't be around to stitch you up." He smiled his crooked grin and I was filled with a mixture of emotions, happiness that he seemed to care for my well-being and yet, still resentful that he thought I needed to be watched after. I was a grown woman; I could take care of myself, kind of… Still, I had been perfectly fine until he waltzed into my life, I didn't _need_ him to protect me.

"I'll see what I can do." I glared, slamming the door with as much force as I could muster, enough to tell him how much I hated his remark and opened my own car door. As the engine started, I turned to see him still sitting there, a smile on his face and in my anger, I put the car in reverse and drove away, trying my hardest to not turn around to look back at him though as I glanced in my rearview mirror, I saw that he was still smiling and it infuriated me, more than I would have liked to admit.

**A/N:**

**Hey guys! I hope you are having a great weekend, lucky for you, you get an update because I have an interview in Seattle tomorrow morning hence the no going out with my friends tonight. Anyways, I hope you enjoyed the new chapter! It was pretty long and took pretty much all day! Anyways! I can't wait to hear what you all have to say! As usual, I want to thank everyone who continues to add this story to your favorites/alerts! You amaze me each time because there are always more! I appreciate it so much because there wouldn't be a story if people didn't read it!**

**I'd also like to thank my reviewers! You guys rock and I appreciate everything you say! You are the reason why I love writing!  
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**Thank you all again! You all are amazing!**

**Preview: Port Angeles (though there will be minor changes, like Alice is probably going to go with her along with Angela and probably Jessica)… Bella is going to learn soon about what Edward has been hiding… And someone is going to show up that is going to turn things completely upside down for both Edward and Bella… Though there was suggestions as to Bella's daughter showing up it's not what is going to happen… I wanted to make that part of a sequel if there is one… All I can say is that this is following as close to cannon as I can since they are all human…**

**I hope you all are having a lovely weekend and I can't wait to see what people think about this new chapter!  
**


	13. Chapter 13

**Baby You Can Stop Running  
Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight, or the parts that I borrowed from.**

**Chapter Thirteen**

**BPOV**

Right now, I really wished Forks were larger than the three square miles that it made up. It had been a habit I picked up living in Palo Alto, the need to mindlessly drive around town in order to clear my thoughts and right now, I had a lot of thoughts and three miles just weren't enough. I aimed the truck North, at least a drive to Port Angeles would be pretty, it would be long, and I could stop at one of the bookstores so I would have something to occupy my thoughts, at the least, keep _him_ from appearing in my thoughts as much as he was. How was it that he had managed to weasel his way into my mind the way that he had? The rain poured down on the truck and I turned the wipers on as I began my drive, thinking only for a moment that I should at least tell Emmett where I was going.

I pulled off the 101 for a moment, my hand reached into my purse and pulled the small phone out. There had been five missed calls and as I looked at the call log, I noticed that three of them were from Jacob. That, in and of itself, meant that someone had given him my number. Two guesses to figure out who that was. I made a mental note to kill Jessica the next time I saw her. I cleared the screen, I'd deal with the missed calls later, besides, Jacob should have known better, I told him to leave me alone. Really, right now that was all I needed, space and time to think.

"Hey Bells… Where are you?" His voice was quiet, as though he was hiding from something, or someone.

"Em? Why are you so quiet?" I asked.

"I'm kind of hiding."

"From what?"

"Rose…" I tried hard not to laugh but I couldn't help it as I began to picture my big burly brother hiding from his model like girlfriend. "It's not funny… She's insatiable today and I'm tired."

"Are you really saying you can't handle the sex? Are you really turning down sex?" My voice gave away my surprise. I had never heard such words uttered from the mouth of my older brother.

"We've been at it since last night… I don't think I can take any more physically…"

"Shhh Em. I really don't need to hear the details of your sex life."

"Please Bella come home so I have an excuse to come out of hiding."

"I was on my way to Port Angeles." I complained, not really wanting to turn around. I longed for the silence of the car, to be left alone with only my thoughts. "I can't just turn around."

"Fine then I'll tell her that you want us to meet you there."

"I really just want to be alone Emmett." I sighed, looking out the window, watching as a few cars passed splashing water all over my side window.

"You won't have to bother with us… We can meet up for dinner… I just need to get her out of this house." I sighed, loud enough for him to hear it and the begging started again.

"Please Bella? I'll owe you big."

"Fine…" I relented.

"We'll meet you at La Bella Italia at 7." He said the smile apparent in his voice and he hung up before I could protest. I tossed the phone on the seat and pulled back onto the road; I would have exactly four hours to myself before I had to witness the loving, over sexed couple. Exactly four hours to prepare myself, and I would need every single one of them.

I heard my familiar ring tone only a few moments after I had turned back onto the road and I saw the number light the screen. I thought very seriously about opening the window and tossing it out, never having to feel the sense of dread that took over my body as his name lit up the screen. Why was he being so relentless? Why did he feel that after all these years he could just show up in my life and act like nothing was wrong? Did he really believe that things could go back to how they once were? How they had been before I was pregnant. I wanted to scream, and yell and cry and, as much as I hated to admit it to myself, I wanted to be in Edwards presence, more exactly, in his arms.

There he was again, inserted into my life, into my thoughts without a second glance. He was unlike anyone I had ever met before and the way that he seemed to flood my thoughts was overwhelming. My one and only other relationship, had never stirred up these kinds of feelings and I even had seriously believed that I had loved Jake. Still, the more I compared them, the more I realized that with Jake, I had never felt the electricity that seemed to pulse through me the way it did when Edward touched me. Never before had one single person inhabited my mind to the point of obsession.

He seemed perfect in every way, and it was frustrating. How could someone like him, someone as devastatingly handsome, as intelligent, as seemingly selfless as him ever see anything more than just plain me? He was hard to read however, and though I sensed that he was seemingly kind, at times I wondered what he really thought what was really going through his mind. From my experience he was warm one minute and cold another. I thought directly of my night at their house. How quickly he had come to the door to help me, how his hands had encircled my shoulders as he placed his jacket over them and how once he realized how long he had lingered, how quickly he corrected himself. Then there was the look that had fallen over his beautiful face when I had come down later that night to find him sitting at his piano, the one that seemed to struggle with whether or not he could stay with me, and yet, he did. And lunch, he had insisted that I join him yet as I tried to understand him more, to learn more about him, he was so curt.

Still, there was something about him, something that seemed to tell me that he was troubled, as though he understood my own pain in a way that I never thought anyone else could. Maybe that was why he was reluctant to talk to me. Two broken people trying to form any kind of relationship was never helpful. It was a perfect recipe for self destruction; how could you possibly help someone else when you couldn't even help yourself? Still, I longed to know what was plaguing him, what it was behind those vibrant eyes that seemed to darken them at times.

Scary… He has asked me if I thought he could be scary. As my mind switched to that conversation, I pictured his face in my mind, the look that had fallen across it and I was startled for a moment. In the heat of the moment I had failed to notice the slight hint of hope that was then replaced with anguish. Did he want me to call him a monster? It didn't matter though because when I thought of him, of his voice, his hypnotic eyes, the magnetic force of his personality, I wanted nothing more than to be with him, regardless of what he might have thought of himself.

Parking in Port Angeles was never a problem. The small tourist trap of a town had plenty of it and since October wasn't peak tourist season, there was more than enough parking. I pulled off onto one of the main roads thanking my lucky stars that I didn't have to parallel park, it wasn't exactly one of my strong suits. The rain had stopped around Crescent Lake, but as I stepped out of the truck, I could smell the wet ground and, though there had been a time that I hated it, it was oddly comforting. I felt, if even for the briefest a moments, a sense of familiarity, a sense that I was home and strangely happy about that. After so many years spent running from everything, being back, smelling the familiar scents, seeing the familiar, unchanging scenery, made me feel as though everything was going to be alright; Charlie would push through this and survive, I would come to terms with my past and finally come clean to Jake about it all, and most importantly, I would find the closure I needed to move on with my life.

I meandered through the streets, which were slowly filling up with the end-of-workday traffic as I made my way downtown, my eyes searching for the familiar sign of the bookstore that I often frequented when I lived here. I wasn't paying as much attention as I should to where I was going; I was wrestling with despair. I was trying to shard not to think about him, and what he had said… and more than anything trying to beat down my hopes that he wouldn't go to Seattle, and that tomorrow I would find him at the hospital, looking after Charlie. In my daydream, he was smiling his crooked, hypnotizing smile my way as I walked into the room… I looked up and to my left and I wished I hadn't, sitting there, parked across the street was someone's silver Volvo and it all came crashing down on me. _Stupid, unreliable doctor_… There was no way he was here; I needed to squish that new hope before I had the chance to fester.

I walked into the familiar bookstore, the scent of new books overwhelmed me for a minute. Still, it was a scent that I would never be able to hate, like the familiarity of a town untouched, it was comforting. I wondered for a moment how long some of those books had been on the shelves as I made my way to the classics, some were probably the same ones that had been there since my last visit. My fingers brushed over the covers as I read through the titles that they had available; for a moment I contemplated buying something contemporary as I had already ready through so many of the classics, but I realized that wasn't why I was here. Contemporary novels, though interesting, would not prove me with the distractions that Austen, Shakespeare, Hardy, or the Bronte sisters would provide for me. And I needed, more than anything else, distractions from the reality that I was coming to accept as my own.

I pulled out a new copy of _Wuthering Heights_, a novel that I had ready countless times, so many so that my own copy, which was tucked neatly away in the bookshelf at Charlie's house, was falling apart, the pages now falling loosely from the paperback binding. I tucked the book under my arm as I continued to scan the titles, my eyes landing on Thomas Hardy's _Tess of the D'Ubervilles_. Hardy spoke with such clarity the tale of the tragic, ruined woman and somehow, I seemed to understand, seemed to know exactly what that felt like. I pulled it from the shelf, adding it to my pile and deciding that two books would have to be enough, there were plenty more at home.

I walked back to the truck, still having a few hours to waste before meeting with Emmett and Rosalie, and tossed the bag that contained my two new books onto the seat. I glanced briefly up at the sky, watching as the dark clouds rolled in, it would only be a matter of a few minutes to an hour before they released the moisture that was building up within them and I thought twice about going for a walk. Instead, I pulled out _Tess_ and tucked the book into my purse, I would settle with finding a coffee shop to read for a little while. I press the lock down and slammed the door, watching as the rust flaked from the car and fell to the floor.

"Bella?" I heard my name called and I turned around, narrowly missing being hit by a truck as it passed, eliciting a gasp from the pixie haired girl across the street. I closed my eyes trying to block out the image that flooded my system: the one in which the large truck actually did hit me and I saw only one thing, Edwards face as a look of complete and utter terror washed over it, his words echoed in my mind. "_Don't be offended, but you seem to be one of those people who attract accidents like a magnet. So… try not to hurt yourself? I won't be around to stitch you_ _up._" Apparently, it was barely four hours later and I was already finding myself in need of rescuing. What was it about Washington that made me completely vulnerable?

"Oh god Bella I'm so sorry!" Alice cried as she ran across the now dead road. _Just my luck that there would actually be a car on the road when I'm distracted and now that I'm completely, totally acutely aware, there is no one_. "Are you okay?"

She was by my side and I had managed to steady my heart slightly as she pulled me from the street to the sidewalk. Still, I was at a loss for words, unable to think of anything else but my luck, which of course, seemed to bring me back to him. Did he really think that I was incapable of not getting hurt? How could he know me so well? Had Emmett told him all about my clumsiness?

"Bella?" I heard her voice as it broke through my trance.

"Sorry."

"What are YOU apologizing for; I was the one who nearly got you killed! Are you okay?"

"I'm fine." I stated, my voice lower than I had anticipated but my heart was still racing, though for different reasons than before, this time around it was Edward related.

"Are you sure? You're not hurt or anything are you?"

"No I'm fine… Really Alice." I smiled. I noticed then that Jasper was there with her, hadn't Edward mentioned that he was traveling to Seattle with him? "What are you doing here?"

"I wanted to go shopping and since Edward and Jazz are leaving tonight for Seattle, we figured that he could just meet us here for dinner and then they would travel north." She shrugged. "What are you doing here?"

"I needed to clear my mind." I held back the rest of my thoughts, the part that would have revealed that Edward was inhabiting them and that I found her brother completely and totally desirable and wondered if there was even a slight chance that he might feel the same way. Foolish though, I knew the answer to that. Edward Cullen would never feel the same way that I felt about him towards me. "Emmett and Rosalie were going to come down a little while later. No one really feels like cooking since Charlie isn't at the house and apparently Emmett has exhausted all the restaurants in Forks."

Alice smiled brightly, as though she was picturing the image in her head, or maybe something else as her smile faded quickly and she appeared pensive. "The three of you should join us and Edward tonight." I felt my cheeks color as she said Edwards name and I watched as she raised an eyebrow, unfortunately she had noticed that.

"I don't know…"

"Think about it! We are meeting at Bella Italia tonight at 7."

"It appears that I'll see you there regardless." She cocked her head to the side. "It's where I'm supposed to meet both Emmett and Rosalie."

"Perfect!" She smiled and I couldn't help but smile back, _damn little pixie and her infectious smile_. I hoped that she didn't take it the wrong way, that we would be joining them. Still though, the prospect of seeing Edward again lifted my spirits slightly and I looked down the road for a coffee shop. "Where are you off to?"

"I think I might walk down to the boardwalk, find a coffee shop or something and sit and read for a bit." I stated as though it was the most normal thing in the world, which, for me it was. The barista's at the Starbucks near my apartment knew me so well that they always had my drink waiting for me when I got there.

"By yourself?" She seemed to scrunch her nose at the comment and my eyes fell on Jasper who merely was looking around the town, his body language seemed to give away his discomfort.

"Sure."

"Come shopping with Jasper and I!"

"Thank you for the invite but I really do just want to read for a bit." I said, watching as her face fell slightly. "Besides, I'd only slow you down… I'm not really a very good shopping companion, I'd be complaining the whole time." It seemed to appease her slightly as she nodded.

"Okay, but I will see you tonight at dinner." It wasn't a question, at least, it didn't come out like one. Instead her words were demanding, as though I would be sorry if I didn't join them.

"We will see you at the restaurant, yes." I replied, letting her know that it didn't necessarily mean that we would be joining them. I wasn't sure what kind of a relationship Emmett had with Edward and Alice, and I wasn't sure how happy he would be if I had agreed to something without his knowledge.

She raised her eyebrows, surprised by my response. "I guess that will have to do for now." She linked her arm with Jaspers and began to walk down the street as I looked at their retreating backs. I wrestled with the decision to call out to her, to ask if Edward was already here in town but I refrained. Alice was very perceptive, much more than I would have liked to admit, and she would have seen through the comment. I felt a raindrop as it hit my forehead and began my walk towards the boardwalk, hoping to find somewhere warm and a shelter from the rain that was threatening to fall in any minute.

**EPOV**

I wanted to follow Bella, to make sure that she made it home but I had other obligations, ones that, although I went with reluctance (more so now that this angel had appeared in my life), I knew I had to follow through with. In my Bella induced daze, I had failed to hear the calls that had come in, three, all from Jasper asking where I was, the last saying that he and Alice were shopping in Port Angeles and that I could pick him up there.

I headed to Port Angles twenty minutes after dropping Bella off at the hospital, a small overnight bag packed for the night that Jasper I and would spent in Seattle. The rain was coming down hard and I knew that if I didn't get out soon, the wind would only blow them more towards the worst part of the drive, the five or so mile stretch by Lake Crescent which consisted of more twists and turns than I would have liked on such a narrow road, especially when it was slick.

My thoughts wandered as I gazed through the wet windshield. Bella was so different from all the other girls that I had ever known, who had ever thrown themselves at me and I couldn't help but wonder if that was part of the attraction. True, before her I had never found myself interested in anyone, but it seemed that her reserved personality, her complete unawareness of how wonderful, of how beautiful she was, was breathtaking. She had no idea what kind of things the stirred deep within me, things that had been dormant for so many years. She was selfless to the point of an extreme, always thinking about others before herself, and though it should have shocked me, I knew that it fit all too well with what little information I'd learned of her character. Her parents separation mixed with her irresponsible mother, had caused her to grow up early, to become the caretaker. _She would make a wonderful mother_.

I was shocked with the thought. Children. Did I want her to be the mother of my children? Yes… Stupid to even ask myself that. Would she even want me? I was unsure of that. Her protests of coming to lunch with me had served as a curveball; especially after the words I had heard her speak in her sleep. Still, I couldn't help but feel the glimmer of hope that she would want me. Her apparent lack of enthusiasm when I had told her that I wouldn't be at the hospital had warmed me like I never thought it would. She _seemed_ upset about that, distraught that she might not see me for a few days. Still, it couldn't compare to the ache that I was feeling knowing I wouldn't see her, that I couldn't hear her beautiful voice, smell her intoxicating scent, listen to the words that she spoke. I wanted nothing more than to get to know her and this trip to Seattle was interrupting it, still, I owed Jasper and I knew how important this was to him.

Pulling into the town I saw the familiar truck and I felt the palpitations in my heart as I realized she had not gone home but had taken a drive here. She drove here, to Port Angeles, in that kind of rain. My concern for her well being seemed stronger than ever, I could see her, the slick of the road against the rubber of the tires, the tires hydroplaning as she took the curve, the truck submerged within the cool, crystal blue waters of the large lake. I was frightened, not because I was finding myself concerned, but more as what would happen if anything _had_ happened to her. How could I ever cope with her not here? The world was already a bleak, depressing place, her presence was the only thing that seemed to bring any kind of brightness, any light to my dark world and I wasn't sure what I would do if that sun was never to rise again.

I parked a few blocks down, slouching down in the car as my eyes fell on her, watching as she stumbled along the road. Even on paved cement she still couldn't find steady footing and I smiled for a moment, until I thought of how hurt she could get in the process. Her file seemed to tell me that she always seemed to get hurt; a broken arm here, a broken leg there, deep gashes… It was all too much to bear. As she walked closer I watched a scowl appear on her face as she looked at the car. For a brief moment I feared that she had seen me, though if she had, she chose to ignore me as she passed by, not bothering to even look into the window, where she could have seen me.

I wanted to follow her, but I refrained, choosing to call Jasper to let him know that I was there. I feared that if I didn't leave soon, if I saw Bella again, I wouldn't be able to get into the car and head East with Jasper.

"Where have you been?" His voice was demanding. Though I knew he loved Alice, I imagined he didn't enjoy being dragged around with her while she shopped.

"Sorry… I was taking care of the sick?"

He grunted, "Sure you were… I'd bet my life that you weren't anywhere near the sick."

"Technically I was checking on Mr. Swan…" Jasper knew the truth, knew my feelings, probably better than even I did.

"And I'm sure you didn't see Bella at all right?" I was silent as I began to think of my response.

"She _is_ my patient." I responded wryly.

"Yea, sure… I'm sure that's the extent of your relationship." He grumbled. "Just hurry and get here so that I can get out of here, I'm not sure how much more shopping I can take."

"You realize that the reason we are going to Seattle is to go shopping right?"

"That's different… It's a future investment." He was vague though I hoped Alice wouldn't pick up on it, her sixth sense however always made that a probability.

"Don't remind me."

"Are you opposed of my plans?"

"If I were opposed would I really be going with you?"

"I suppose not."

"Where are you both?"

"I'm sitting down… _She_ is trying more things on."

"And that would be where exactly?"

"Jazz, if that's who I think it is, tell Edward that we are staying for dinner… I'm having one of those feelings that is telling me that you both have to stay a little longer than you had planned. Plus, if it's what I think, it should be worth his while." I heard Alice call from wherever she was… Damn her 'clairvoyance' of course I already knew to what it was she was most likely speaking of.

"Did you catch that?" Jasper asked and I could hear the amused tone in his voice.

"Yes." I grumbled though I was once again fighting an inner battle with myself, the one that was happy to know that I would be seeing her, and the other that was afraid that if I saw her again that it would be a turning point, that I would never be able to leave her alone again, even if I knew it was the best option for her.

**A/N:**

**I'm so sorry that it's taken so long to get a chapter out! It's been a VERY stressful week as my computer crashed and Dell has been completely unhelpful about it all… They sent me the WRONG disks to restore my computer and I'm still waiting for them (I've been to the point of tears on the phone with them as I'm being punished for their mistakes, again… This isn't the first time, though I'll never buy a Dell again… I'm so getting a Mac book pro next year)… Thankfully my mom took a trip up here to visit and she left me with her laptop. Otherwise I wouldn't have been able to write anything and I've been itching to write.**

**So it's just a little bit of a filler chapter, setting up a few things for the encounter with the stalkers that she met in the actual book… It's also obviously, going to be the turning point in the Edward/Bella relationship, still they aren't really going to be together either just yet… It's still too early, but their friendship **_**will**_** be strengthened. **

**Thank you to everyone who continues to add this story to their alerts/favorites! And a special thanks to my awesome reviewers:**

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**I hope that everyone enjoys this chapter! Please please let me know what you think!**

**Also, for those who celebrate: Happy Halloween! It's going to be a crazy night so I might need a few days to post chapter fourteen as a recovery though I'm DEFINATLY looking forward to the extra hour of sleep on Sunday!**


	14. Chapter 14

**Baby You Can Stop Running**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight of Midnight Sun… Both of which I pulled heavily from for this chapter. All that credit, all those words pulled from the books, belong entirely to Stephanie Meyer. As do the characters of the story…**

**Chapter Fourteen**

**BPOV**

_"Edward?" I whispered, sitting up from the bed, my eyes focused on a large black figure that obstructed the door. The light from the hall was slight, and with the mixture of the darkness of the room, it was impossible to make out the intimidating frame. I heard the deep growl of the predator and knew immediately that this was not Edward, his voice was not the same, and I felt my body tremble in fear. The black figure moved closer to the bed, his face, however, was still obscured from the darkness created by the night._

_"__Who are you?" My voice quivered as I pulled my knees to my chest, my arms hugging them as close to my body as I could. He was silent, and as he moved closer I could begin to make out his features. _

_He was stunning, in a way that was different than Edward's, though beautiful all the same. His skin was olive toned, a gentle glow that would be impossible to attain with my pale, pink skin, and it was a color that I was envious of. His hair was dark, black almost, and cut short to his head, not short enough to be a buzz cut, but short nevertheless. His frame was large, though not as tall as Edward or as brawny as Emmett's, but his body was well formed, the muscles that could be seen through the shirt that he wore were enough to crush me in one swift movement had that been his intention._

_"__Who are you?" I continued to press as I felt my heart race in my chest._

_"__Are you with him?" His deep, bass voice filled the small room and his eyes met mine. I had never known fear like the one that seemed to spread through my body as I looked into his dark eyes that seemed to glow red. _

_"__With who?" _

_"__Edward. He loves you." There was an anger in his voice, and he walked around the side of the bed and I noticed that his hand was clenched into a tight fist._

I felt a hand as it touched my shoulder; my eyes fluttering open as I realized that it had all been just a dream. Still, my body seemed to quake with fear, there had been something all too real about it.

"I'm sorry to have disturbed you but you were whimpering and it seemed you were distressed." The soft voice of the female in front of me spoke and I nodded my thanks before reaching down to see that my phone was buzzing. There were four new voice mails, one from Jacob, and three from Emmett.

"Bella where the hell are you?" I could hear the distress in his voice and I sighed, closing the book that was resting in my lap and tucking it into my purse.

"I'm sorry, I fell asleep at the coffee shop."

"Do you have any idea what time it is?" I looked out the window, darkness had fallen over the small town and I realized that it had to have been well past seven. "I've been trying to call you for twenty minutes now! I had no idea where you were!"

"I'm sorry Emmett. I'll be there soon. I'm down by the boardwalk. If I'm not there in ten minutes you can send the police after me. I'm really, really sorry about that, I hadn't anticipated dozing off." We talked for a few moments longer before I hung up and tucked the phone into the front pocket of my jeans; I had already closed up my purse and had no desire to open it up again.

As I began my trek back towards downtown, I noticed that I had no recollection of these buildings. Unlike the small window shops that I remembered, these seemed to be buildings that the visiting public were not intended to see. They were somber colored warehouses with large bay windows, surrounded by wire fences, and padlocked for the night. I began to walk faster, my feet carrying me past a bar where a group of men were crowded around and I heard one call out to me.

"Hey there!" I glanced up automatically, my eyes taking in the four of them. They all appeared to be in their twenties, maybe a few years older than myself. Two, were slightly overweight, the fingers each holding a cigarette and I cringed slightly as I watched the one on the right bring it to his lips, the ember burning, lighting up and appearing almost like the color of the eyes of the man in my dream. I continued to walk, still watching them from the corner of my eye.

"Hey wait!" The voice had been the same as the first and I saw who it had been who was calling after me. He was tall, much taller than me, and, though he wasn't as built as the others, he seemed strong enough to take me. I wished that I had brought my pepper spray, but it was in San Francisco, tucked neatly away into my beside table drawer. I watched as he shrugged away from the building as he began to cross the street.

"Stay away from me." I warned, though my throat was dry and I knew the sound it elicited was nowhere near the strong and fearless voice that I had intended it to sound like. I wanted to scream but I saw that there was no one around, the street was barely even lit, save for a few street lamps which glowed a dull orange.

"Don't be like that sugar." He called, and I watched as the three other men began to follow him. I could feel my heart race in my chest. Never in San Francisco had I ever been in a situation like this, and here I was, in a small port town, about to be raped, possibly killed. How was that possible? How could all these terrible things be happening in such small towns, and nothing, not a single thing had ever happened to me in a city as large as San Francisco, where one would have expected these things to happen.

I began to contemplate my options in my head. Running would be pointless, with my luck I would trip and fall, making their attack all the more easy. Back in high school, before my move to Forks, our physical education teacher had taught us the basics of self-defense, still, that had been years ago and I wasn't sure how much of it I could recall, never having had a need to use it. Heel of the hand, trust upward, hopefully breaking the assailants nose or shoving it into the brain; Finger through the eye socket, try to pop the eye out; and of course, the standard groin maneuver. It was all I could think of and I braced myself, my feet a few inches apart as I watched them move closer. Still, I could hear the original voice in my head, the one that told me that there was no way I could walk away from this unscathed, not with four attackers, maybe not even with just one.

I began to think of Emmett, the phone was buzzing in the pocket of my jeans and I knew that it was him, it had been over ten minutes, I should have been back in town, I should have been sitting in the small Italian restaurant by now, not standing in a dark street like I was. I briefly thought to call the police but I knew there would be no point, it would only cause these men to walk faster, to move closer to me. I looked around; the street was dead save for a few cars that seemed to move along the road two hundred feet away. I longed for someone to turn down this street, for someone to see my standing in the orange flow of the street light, to see the four men as they stalked closer to me, slowly. I longed to scream, to bring someone from inside the bar outside, but my throat was still dry and it wouldn't produce any sort of sound that anyone would be able to hear. Charlie… I hadn't had a proper goodbye to Charlie… Had it not been for the fear that was pulsing through me, I was certain that I would begin to cry, but I wouldn't… I couldn't. Surely, these men would only take pride in my obvious fear and though I was scared, I couldn't give them the pleasure of knowing that they had succeeded.

I closed my eyes, trying to picture Edward, trying to make the pain of the situation go away. I could hear his voice in my head, the voice telling me to run, but I couldn't. And it was in that moment that I saw a car turn down the quiet street, the bight headlights flashing into the darkness. The car narrowly almost hit one of the men and I jumped out into the street, my feet moving under me, as I ran towards the car and I watched as it fishtailed around to my surprise. The silver car was next to me in a matter of moments and the I watched as the passenger side door flew open.

"Get in." The voice commanded.

It was amazing how instantaneously the chocking fear vanished, amazing how suddenly the feeling if security washed over me – even before I was off the street as soon as I heard his voice. I jumped into the seat, slamming the door shut behind me.

He barreled down the road, swerving to hit the men as they dove from the street to the sidewalk. The car was dark, and I could barely make out his face. Still, I could hear the squeal of the tires against the asphalt as he sharply turned the corner at a speed that surprised even myself. I had to reach down and grip the seat to maintain my balance. My head was spinning, and it was interrupted as I heard his voice again.

"Put on your seatbelt." I quickly obeyed and watched as he continued to speed down the streets, running a few stop signs in his attempt to leave the scene quickly.

I felt utterly safe and, for the moment, totally unconcerned about where we were going. I stared at his face in profound relief, relief that went beyond my sudden deliverance. I studied his flawless features in the limited light, waiting for my breath to return to normal; until it occurred me to that his expression was murderously angry.

"Are you okay?" I asked, surprised that, although my fear had dissipated, my throat was still dry. The words that came out were hoarse and weak.

"No," he said curtly, his tone angry and it sent a chill down my spine.

I sat in silence, afraid to speak, watching his face while his blazing eyes stared straight ahead, until the car came to a sudden stop. The look on his face was unlike any that I had ever seen before and it both confused me and excited me. I began to wonder how he had found me… My thoughts drifted however and I looked around, the darkness making it impossible to see anything but a few trees along the roadside, and I knew that we weren't in town anymore.

"Bella?" His voice was tight, and I could hear the edge that it contained.

"Yes?"

"Are you alright?" I turned my body to face him but he was still staring out the windshield into the darkness that lay ahead of us. I could see the fury in his face.

"Yes." I whispered, suddenly intimidated by him. I never thought that I would see his perfect features marred by his furious scowl. My Adonis had been replaced with someone else entirely and though I knew he meant no harm to me, I wondered where this newfound person had come from. I owed him my life, had he not shown up when he had, I knew that my fate would have ended up with me in the icy Pacific Ocean. Still, though I felt calm in his presence, his fury, the raw anger on his face, caused my heart to pound wildly against my chest.

I couldn't deny that even in his fury that he was attractive, he was still the picture of David that Michelangelo had sculpted from marble, but there was something there, something that told me that he wasn't really the person that I thought he was. Something that told me, that hidden, deep down, was a part of him that he had buried long ago and this incident had brought that once again to the surface. What it was though, I had no idea.

**EPOV**

Anger seeped through my veins and my heart raced as I turned the corner and saw what I had. I was thankful that I had kept my windows rolled down regardless of the chilly night air. I could hear the catcalls, the men and their taunts; their laughs and I knew that they were trying to scare her. Though I didn't know them, I knew men like them. These kinds of men were hoping she would run, it made the hunt all the more fun. I wondered if they would like what I had in store for them.

As I turned at the end of the road I watched her run towards me, all she wanted was someone to save her. I was lucky I got there in time, a few minutes more and she wouldn't have been in one piece. The other part of my mind that wasn't thankful that I got there in time was thinking up ways I could hurt the others. The three who stood watching, they would die, the predator who had advanced on her, the one who seemed to be the leader, I wanted him to suffer for even thinking of hurting her. I wanted to hear him beg me for his life, a life that I could take without second thought.

"Get in." I commanded, watching as she slid into the seat quickly, the door slamming shut and I pressed my foot down on the gas. I saw her look up at me from the corner of my eye though I kept my eyes on the road, wondering if I might be able to hit one of them with my car. _No… I could not do that with her in the car. I could not let her feel any more pain than I was sure she already was._ Her eyes were soft, trusting and I found that for a moment, I stopped thinking about the men I so desperately wanted to hunt down. All that mattered was her, she was only girl in the world, the only thing that even matter to me anymore, the one thing that would keep me from doing what I so desperately wanted to do.

The rage returned as I began to think about what they might have done to her. I wanted to stop the car, to get out and attack them. I would drag them away, of her sight, and leave her alone. It was a long shot that another dangerous human being would be prowling the streets of Port Angeles, but it was a long shot that there would have even been these four men there to begin with. Like a magnet, she seemed to attract any kind of danger to herself and I knew that I could not leave her, I could not let her out of my sight, and I didn't want to.

I wanted his death so savagely that the need for it rang in my ears and clouded my sight. It was a death, a feeling that I had not wanted since I had fought for James' execution. It was a craving, a necessity that I had long buried and it was raging to the surface. After all my years of repenting, all that time spent trying to be a good person, to make up for the life that I had urged to have taken away, I wanted nothing more than to rip her attackers limbs apart, limb by limb, skin from muscle, muscle from bone. I wanted it to hurt, and I wanted vengeance.

Still, my jaw was clenched, and I gripped the wheel hard, my knuckles white with the rage, but I couldn't go after them. Not with her in the car clinging to her seat and staring at me with her wide, hypnotizing eyes with such trust. Trust that I didn't deserve.

"Put on your seatbelt." It was an order and she obeyed, startled I think by the harshness of my voice. My anger was obvious. I could still feel her eyes on me but I was afraid to look at her, afraid that she would see the red in my eyes, the anger, the bloodlust, and in seeing it, curl away with fear. She seemed oddly relaxed as she leaned deeper into the seat and it confused me, she should have been scared, terrified, and looking at her, feeling her next to me, it would have been impossible to even think that she had almost been attacked.

"Are you okay?" Her voice broke the silence. _She _wanted to know if _I _was okay?

"No." My voice fumed as I continued to drive until I was out of town.

The darkness surrounded us as I pulled off the road. I was so furious still that my body continued to remain frozen in place. My ice-locked hands on the wheel ached to crush her attacker, to grind him into pieces so mangled that his body could never be identified. One of the perks of being a doctor, I could get rid of anything that might identify him. He wouldn't be missed. Who could miss a monster like him? Still, going back to find him again, it would mean leaving her alone, and that was something I wouldn't do. I couldn't do.

"Bella?" I clenched my jaw and though I tried to remain calm as I said her name, tried to keep my voice controlled, I wasn't sure I was able to.

"Yes?" Her voice croaked. I must have scared her.

"Are you all right?" That was the most important thing. The only thing that mattered. _I _knew that, but it was still hard to not think about turning around and killing the men who I had left behind.

"Yes." I could still hear what I had assumed to be her fear. She must be so frightened… Still, with my rage, I was in no condition to comfort her. She would surely see the brutality radiating from my body, she would see the monster that I was trying to conceal from her and it would only frighten her more. I would have to calm myself first and that required thinking of something else… Anything else.

"Distract me please." I begged, my eyes still locked on the windshield. I didn't want her to see my eyes, to see the darkness that I was sure had overtaken them.

"I'm sorry, what?"

"Just prattle about something unimportant until I calm down."

"Um…" She paused as she thought about what to say next, most likely trying to understand what it was that I was so angry about, I imagined. "I'm going to kill Jessica Stanley the next time I see her?" Her tone was more questioning than it was a statement.

Yes… This was exactly what I needed. Only she would come up with something so completely absurd that I would have no choice but to calm down. Had I not been so angry, I would have been laughing.

"Why?"

"For multiple reasons… First, she told Angela I was in town, there by forcing me to go out last night which obviously informed Jacob that I was back in town…" I winced slightly at his name… No, I didn't want to hear his name, that wasn't going to calm me; it was only going to anger me even more. _Just listen to her voice Edward._ "Then she went and gave him my number and he's been calling non stop all day!" Her tone was filled with her outrage, though it seemed more like a kitten trying to be a tiger. "If she's dead then she can't meddle with my life anymore than she already is…"

What she probably didn't know was that Jessica's behavior had nothing to do with her gossiping hobbies. Jessica was jealous of Bella… I could see it in her eyes when she looked at her, could hear it in her tone. She wanted to make Bella's life hell. My thoughts drifted to Jessica, and I was thankful for Bella's mindless chatter, it was working, I was calming down, no longer thinking about the men that wanted to hurt her. Now I was trying to make sense of Jessica, to understand what it was that she disliked so much about her. I remembered hearing her earlier in the day at the hospital giving the tall man Bella's number, though at the time I had no idea who he was exactly, or what he was to Bella.

"I heard about that…" I responded. She had grown pensive and had stopped talking and I needed her to talk. I needed to hear her voice.

"You did?" She seemed to think about it for a moment. "Then again if I kill her I'm pretty sure I'll have to deal with that leech Mike Newton…" I noticed her shutter as though the very thought disgusted her… I couldn't help but feel happy with that response, knowing that she would never want him. Though that still left the subject of her ex boyfriend. No, I couldn't let myself think about that, it would only bring forth a different kind of rage, and the point of this was to make the rage go away. "I'm not sure what's worse… Maybe I'll just rip her tongue out… If she doesn't have that then she can't talk."

The car was silent and I felt myself sighing.

"Are you better?" She questioned shyly.

"Not really…"

I was calmer, sure but still not better. The only thing that I wanted more than to turn around and kill her attacker was her. And, though I couldn't have her, just the dream of having her made it impossible for me to go and seek him out, to kill him in the most gruesome way possible. Bella deserved more than a killer. I'd spent the past decade or so trying to be something other than that, to repent for my sins in the past. And still, those years of effort could never make me worthy of her. Deep down I had convinced myself however, that if I returned to that life, the life of a killer (as it was still the way that I saw myself), for even one night, I would surely put her out of my reach forever. I was trying to be good enough for her, and though it was an impossible goal, I could only keep trying.

"What's wrong?" She said softly, concern washed over her face as I leaned my head back against the seat, staring at the ceiling of my car.

"Sometimes I have a problem with my temper Bella. But it _wouldn't_ be helpful for me to turn around and hunt down those men… At least… I'm trying to convince myself that it wouldn't be." I replied, glancing at her in the silence that now filled the small car.

Her face, like always was unreadable and I was wondering what she was thinking. Had she heard in my words how much evil I was capable of? Had I scared her? It was true that she wasn't screaming, yet, at least. She surely, through the course of however long it had been that we had been in the car, had seen just how bad my temper could be. Still I longed to reach out to her, to wrap my arms around her and pull her close, to breathe her in, to kiss her head, to rock her softly and tell her that it was all going to be okay, that nothing would ever harm her, but I couldn't. It would be impossible for her to _not_ be afraid of me after the way I had acted. Even _I_ was afraid of me.

"Emmett and Rosalie will be worried." She said quietly and I heard how calm her voice was and I wondered how that was possible, how she could be so calm after everything that had happened to her, after I had been so outraged. Was she in shock? It was the only plausible explanation. "I was suppose to meet them…"

Did she want to be away from me? Or was she just worried about Emmett? Had I succeeded in showing her the person that I really was and that had terrified her, as I was certain it would have? After all, it _should _have terrified her.

I didn't answer her; I merely pulled back onto the road and began to drive back into town. Yet it seemed that every inch that I drove that brought me closer to the town, my resolve seemed to go out the window. I was so close to them. I could drop her off at the restaurant and she would never know the difference. No… She would know, but she wouldn't be around to watch and she would be safe with Emmett… It if was impossible that I could never have her the way I wanted to have her, what difference would it make anyways? Shouldn't the man be punished for what he had tired to do? How could I let him get away so easily when it would have been so easy to go back and find him, to hurt him the way he wanted to hurt her?

No. I wasn't giving up. Not yet. I wanted her too much to surrender. I would have to push my thoughts aside. Somewhere down the road he would do the same thing again, and someone would punish him the way I longed to. But he would not die at my hands, at my will. If I did, it would only push her further from my reach, and that, would be unbearable.

**A/N:**

**So, I know that I pulled a lot from Stephanie's work for this chapter… It will be the last time I believe that I use so much of her work, I just felt that I couldn't do anything with this chapter then she already had done herself. Plus, she did it so beautifully! She is amazing! Still, I did add a few things, change things around so I hoped you liked my changes! As for the dream, it's a little prophetic to what will come… Anyone known who the guy was? I'm sure you will have no problem figuring it out.**

**As always, I'd like to thank anyone who had added this story to their alerts/favorites. And I'd also like to send a special thanks to my reviewers:**

**Charmedxxangel18****  
Roughdraft525****  
Bloodredeclipse  
****TwiWriter15  
FRK921  
SWChica  
Evelyn08  
MyraidProBlood  
Luvntwilight  
Greenbuttonsx  
x-aly-x  
wingedvamp1107  
justm**

**I hope that people are still liking what they are reading, it's one of the benefits to getting reviews so please, send them my way and let me know what you are thinking. I'm a fan of constructive criticism, and of course, anything that feeds the muse is a good thing. So please, though I'm not one to demand a certain number of reviews for more chapters, I do appreciate them and take your comments to heart. Don't be shy! If you have something to say I'd love to know!**

**On another note: the next chapter will be at the restaurant and though it will use things from Stephanie Meyer's genius… I will be changing questions and what not as Bella isn't trying to figure out that he is a vampire… So I'm really excited about it because I'll be able to use more of my imagination for it. **

**ALSO… which is MORE important: if you are a US citizen and over the age of 18 and are a registered voter… GO OUT TOMORROW AND VOTE if you haven't done so already. I sent in my ballot on Friday. And though I'd never, ever push my political beliefs on anyone, I ask you all to consider this when voting: Pick the candidate that YOU feel with create the change that we need in this country… YOUR voice matters (as a student of politics and government, I can assure you that it does). Don't let anyone but yourself decide for you. It's important, this is such a fantastic election, and SO much is at stake. GO OUT AND VOTE if you can! Even if your candidate is unsuccessful, at least you know you have done everything that you could do! It's really important. So no, I will not say who I voted for, though if you ask I wouldn't be adverse to telling, I'm passionate about my choice as I've made an informed choice… I will not say anything to sway anyone. It's up to YOU to decide, don't let anyone take that away from you.**

**Right. So I'm already working on chapter fifteen. I'll probably finish it tomorrow as I watch the results of the election roll in. I'm thankful that my classes were cancelled for tomorrow. It makes things even better!**

**Remember: Please let me know what you thought of my chapter!!!!! Have a great night everyone!**


	15. Chapter 15

**Baby You Can Stop Running  
Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or Midnight Sun… Stephanie Meyer does… I merely pulled from her beautiful words to adapt to my plot line. **

**Chapter Fifteen**

**BPOV**

Edward angry confused me. Never had I ever seen anyone act with such pure, raw anger before and though I know it should have scared me, it didn't. There had only been a few times in my life that I had bore witness to such anger: the most prominent, the one that I thought of the most was Emmett's reaction when I told him about Jacob and what had happened. I physically had to stand in front of the door to block him from leaving to hunt him down. At the time, the foolish, naïve girl in me had believed that he was going to come around, that he was merely in shock, after all, I had felt that way when I saw the lines appear on the tests that I took. Looking back on the whole situation, letting Emmett not go after him might have been a problem, maybe if I had let him pummel him in the manner that I knew he so wanted to, I would have felt some comfort. No... I could never wish for anyone to be hurt, regardless of how much they had hurt me. Well, except Jessica maybe. Revenge for what Jessica had done sounded quite nice actually.

I cast my eyes towards him once more, watching as he looked towards the ceiling of the silver Volvo. My eyes studied his features from the side; his lips were stretched taught, almost between a grimace and a frown, his brow was furrowed into a v-shape and I longed to reach out and touch it, to smooth it out. What would he do if I did? I wanted to see his reaction, to see if he trembled at my touch the way I did at his. I should have been thinking of other things, I should have been thinking about what had nearly happened in the street but I couldn't. The only thing that I could think about was what it might feel like to press my lips against his, to touch his cheek, to feel his body against my own.

With my eyes still on him, my thoughts now progressing into something that was no longer PG-13, I heard him sigh. Had he read my thoughts? I felt a small blush creep onto my face and I was thankful for the first time for the night, thankful that he couldn't see.

"Are you better?" I whispered. I wanted to keep my voice quiet because I was afraid that if I spoke too loudly my nerves would cause my voice to squeak.

"Not really..."

"What's wrong?"

"Sometimes I have a problem with my temper, Bella." He was whispering now too, and as he stared out the window, his eyes narrowed into slits. "But it _wouldn't_ be helpful for me to turn around and hunt down those men..." He didn't finish his sentence, taking a moment to pause and gather his anger once again. "At least... I'm trying to convince myself that it wouldn't be."

For the first time, he turned his face to look at me and I wondered desperately what he was thinking. His face was so conflicted and though I knew now that the source of his anger stemmed from the situation that had played out earlier, I couldn't figure out why it bothered him so much. There was nothing that was vested in us, we barely even knew each other, and yet, his anger towards them was astounding. I _should_ probably be feeling like that but it was impossible, it was impossible to be anything but relaxed, to feel comfortable when he was around. I wondered if he could hear my heart race, as it pounded against my chest. His eyes bore deep into me until I couldn't take it any longer and turned to look away, to glance at the clock. It was well past eight now and I feared that Emmett would be worried. He always worried about me, though I suppose he had reason to. It wasn't as though luck had ever been on my side. At least, until tonight. Edward showing up was the one thing that I knew constituted good luck.

"Emmett and Rosalie will be worried..." I said quietly, still not brave enough to look at him and instead I found my eyes focused on my lap and my hands that were twisted together. "I was supposed to meet them."

He started the engine without another word between the two of us. I just listened to the quiet hum of the Volvo as he pulled back onto the street, glancing briefly to see if there were any cars before swinging around and speeding back into town. He drove fast, and I watched as the trees whipped past us, and before I knew it, they were less frequent and replaced with streetlights. We were back in town and through the corner of my eye I noticed that his body was rigid again. Through the glow of the street lights, I could see his hands as they gripped the steering wheel, his knuckles white. I wanted to chastise him, to tell him that he needed to relax, that gripping anything that tight was a bad idea, especially for a surgeon; I was sure he would squeeze too hard and break his knuckles. What use would a broken hand be for a world-class surgeon?

We were along the main road and I held back my surprise as I watched as he effortlessly slid into a parking spot, a spot that I was certain was much too small. Still, he didn't seem to break a sweat and that in and of itself amazed me. I wondered momentarily if he might be able to teach me how to do that. Parallel-parking always made me nervous, there always seemed to exist within my gut that I was going to hit something. I avoided that type of parking like the plague.

I looked out the window and my eyes fell upon Alice, Jasper, Rosalie and Emmett who were standing outside the lights of La Bella Italia. My eyes zeroed in on Emmett and I could instantaneously see the concern on his face. I imagined that he was thinking of all the things I could have gotten into, but I knew that the last thing he ever could have suspected was the truth. Though I hated to hide anything from him, I wasn't sure I could take another reaction like that of Edward's and I knew that Emmett too would have lost his temper. Edward seemed so resolved to not go after the men and I feared that if Emmett went after them, he would go too and I didn't want him to leave me. I wanted him to stay here, to keep me calm. I was certain that as soon as he left my side the reality would sink in and I would be the heap of a mess that he was probably expecting me to be.

I heard his door open, and as I noticed that Jasper had not advanced I was confused. Had he not told me that he and Jasper were traveling East to Seattle tonight? My head snapped to the left and I watched to see him get out.

"What are you doing?" I asked, my confusion apparent in my voice.

"I'm taking you to dinner." He smiled slightly, but his eyes were hard. He stepped out of the car and slammed the door. I watched as he began to move to the other side and I fumbled with the seatbelt, trying to free myself from its confines. His speed was quick and it amazed me and at the same time, made me feel inadequate as I struggled to open the door. He stood there waiting at the sidewalk for me and I glanced up, looking again at his face, my cheeks blazing red as I noticed the slight crease that had developed as he flexed his eyebrows.

"Bella! Where were you!" That voice belonged to Emmett and he was by my side in a matter of moments, sweeping me into his arms.

"I got lost..." I admitted sheepishly as he released his grasp and we walked to where the others were. Edward was quiet and I wondered what he was thinking. "Edward found me though."

"You've finished eating?" His voice called out as we met the others.

"We waited for a while but we didn't know what else to do really. It's not like you answered your phone." Alice responded, her left eyebrow lifted as she eyed him suspiciously as though she knew the truth. "I'm sorry."

"That's fine... I'm not hungry." I replied. It was the truth. There had been so much excitement, so much that had happened that food, eating, was the last thing from my mind.

"I think you should eat something." Edward's voice was low but full of authority. I felt like a child in that instant and I wasn't sure if I should bask in his concern or be angry by it. Never had anyone been so concerned for my well being, at least, not someone who wasn't related by blood. My previous experience with the men in my life had not been kind, and it amazed me that he seemed to be so selfless, it seemed that all he cared about was making sure that I was okay. He's a doctor Bella... He took an oath... Don't look too much into it. His gaze was cast towards Emmett now. "Do you mind if I drive Bella home tonight? That way you don't have to wait here while she eats?"

Emmett looked towards me and I nodded, letting him know that it was okay. "I'll drive your car home Bells. Rose can take the Jeep."

"Jasper, I know we had plans but can we put it off for a bit?" Edward asked, his eyes looking at the tall blonde who had his arm wrapped securely around Alice. "I promise to make it up to you. I know how much you wanted to go but..." His voice trailed off as I watched through the corner of my eye, as I fumbled through my purse looking for the keys to the truck, as he glanced momentarily at me. "Now just doesn't seem to be the right time."

"It's okay. I'll make Carlisle give you another day off. Besides, you work too much anyways I'm sure he'd be more than willing." Edward just nodded and I handed my keys to Emmett who continued to eye me suspiciously.

"Are you sure you're okay?" He asked, his hand on my shoulder. "You look awfully pale."

"I always look pale Em. I'm fine." I insisted, though I knew my voice cracked slightly with the lie. I hated to lie to him but I knew that now wasn't the right time. Really, one furious person was enough for one night. I'd tell Emmett in due time, just not now. Right now I just wanted to be alone with Edward again, to feel him near me and to feel calm.

"Okay... I'll see you at home. I'll wait up."

"You don't have to do that."

"I'll be waiting up." He said again with more firmness. What was it with me and protective males? I just shrugged, arguing with him was pointless. He was relentless and would only continue to stand there and debate it with me until I finally conceded. I merely nodded and he was satisfied. Alice and Jasper were long gone, they had disappeared during my conversation with Emmett and though I would have liked to say goodbye, it was probably better this way, I had a feeling that Alice was able to see right through me. Emmett wrapped his arm around Rosalie's diminutive waist and began their walk down the street.

"Honestly, I'm not hungry." I insisted as I turned to face him. I carefully studied his face, though his expression had not changed and I was still completely in the dark as to what it was that he was thinking.

"Humor me." He replied, a small smile pulling the corners of his lips as he held the door to the restaurant open for me. Just as debating with Emmett was useless, it appeared that Edward was just as stubborn, there would be no further discussion, he would not take no for an answer. I walked past him, taking a moment to breathe in his scent, before I felt the warm heat from the restaurant against my cold skin. I sighed, though I wasn't sure if it was because I was resigning, or because the heat felt good.

The restaurant wasn't crowded - it was the off-season in Port Angeles, which, in all honesty, probably accounted for my own predicament earlier this evening. With so few people around, the men probably through they would have gotten away with it. The host was a female and I watched as she assessed Edward, taking him in, and I understood. I too had a hard time looking at him without feeling a stir of desire deep within myself.

"Hello. You're back." She said, her voice breathy and warm, warmer than she needed to be. I found that I was surprised by how much it bothered me. I cast my gaze back to her as I scrutinized her; she was taller than me, maybe by a few inches, her hair unnaturally blonde and stringy, probably a result of too much peroxide, her eye were blue though you could barely see that with the dark eyeliner and her shirt was tight, her breasts exposed more than what was probably considered to be professional.

"A table for two?" His voice sounded like velvet and I watched as her eyes widened before flicking to me. She was probably wondering what I was doing with him. I was thinking the same thing. She didn't think for long, though I wanted to believe it was a result of her IQ, I knew it was because of how I looked against him, the plainness of my being, and the space that was between us.

Seemingly appeased with her evaluation, she picked up two menus and began to walk towards the restaurant, stopping at a table that was big enough for four people and dead center in the middle of the most crowded area of the restaurant. I was about to sit as she placed the menu's down but looked towards Edward as he shook his head and slipped her what appeared to be money. The act in and of itself surprised me, never having witnessed anyone do anything like that before and she appeared surprised, as though she had not been expecting him to want to be alone with me. I had to admit, even I was surprised by it.

"Perhaps something a little more private?" His voice was low as he spoke only to her and though I knew she was surprised I also watched as her knees shook. Apparently, I was not the only person who had a problem with them in his presence.

"Sure..." She muttered, picking up the menus once again and walking towards the back of the restaurant that was dim, lit by a few lights and the flicker of the candles that rested on the table. "How's that?"

"Perfect." He replied, flashing his bright, wide smile. I felt a pang of jealousy once again, but tried to shake it off. He was merely being polite.

"Um..." She was stuttering again. "Your server will be right out." She walked away quickly though I watched as she stumbled slightly on her five inch heels. _Serves her right_. I shook my head slightly, annoyed that I was letting her get to me so easily. Besides, there was nothing between Edward and I. Nothing at all.

"You really shouldn't do that to people." I criticized, suddenly aware of my braveness. "It's hardly fair."

"Do what?" He cocked his head to the side as he looked at me, his features wrinkled with confusion.

"Dazzle them like that; she's probably hyperventilating in the kitchen right now." He didn't respond, his eyes merely focused on my face, his confusion still obvious. "Oh come on. You have to know the effect you have on people."

"I dazzle people?" His voice sounded incredulous, as though he didn't believe me.

"You haven't noticed? I barely know you and I see that you always get your way. Do you think everyone get's their way so easily?"

He ignored my questions. "Do I dazzle you?"

"Frequently." I admitted, my cheeks blushing a fierce shade of crimson and I watched as he relaxed, his body melting into the seat, his eyes still on me, studying me curiously. I wished for a moment that I could take the comment away. I had given myself away much too quickly.

**EPOV**

I _should_ have let Emmett take her home and I _should_ have gone with Jasper to Seattle. It seemed that what I should do and what I wanted to do however, were two entirely different things. The first thing I had noticed when we finally made it to the restaurant, an hour and a half later, was the look on Emmett's face. It was a look I knew all too well. He, like myself, was protective over this girl, protective to the point of violence and I hoped that she wouldn't tell him what had happened; I wouldn't have been able to stop myself from going with him if he went to seek them out.

I was more than thankful when he agreed to let me take her home. I needed her with me, I needed her presence to keep me calm, to keep me collected. Had it not been for her I would have committed a terrible crime. Though I'm not sure _I _would have considered it terrible, they had it coming to them after all. Still, sitting across from her, watching her as she spoke, listening to her words… I was hypnotized and I wondered if she knew the things that she did to me.

"You really shouldn't do that to people. It's hardly fair." Her tone was disapproving and it brought me out of my thoughts, the thoughts of leaning across the table and pressing my lips against her own.

"Do what?" I stared at her, confused.

"Dazzle them like that – she's probably hyperventilating in the kitchen right now." I looked to the door where Bella's assessment seemed to be true. In all honesty, I hadn't really even paid much attention to the host, my attention had been focused solely on the beauty who sat in front of me. "Oh come on. You _have_ to know the effect you have on people." Her voice was incredulous but I still had no idea really. Sure, there had been girls that were attracted to me, though I never really thought much of it.

"I dazzle people?" I questioned, staring at her intently, trying to figure out what she was thinking. Did I dazzle her?

"You haven't noticed? Do you think everybody gets their way so easily?"

"Do I dazzle _you_?" I voice my curiosity impulsively, and then the words were out and it was too late to recall them. What would I do if she said that I did? What if I didn't? I wanted to desperately for her to say that I did, even if I knew it wasn't for the best. She didn't take long to respond, which gave me less time to really regret asking her the question to begin with.

Her cheeks blushed a fierce shade of crimson and I had my answer before she even had the chance to speak it. "Frequently."

I dazzled her. My heart raced in my chest and felt as though it was going to burst. Had I thought the warmth in my body had been intense when she had spoken in her sleep, nothing compared to this, to her confession. My body was feeling things that I could never remember ever experiencing, things that I had so long ago shut off and now I had no idea how to turn it off again, or if I even wanted to. I was speechless and barely heard the waitress as she approached. I merely stared at Bella's face, watching the blood spreading under her skin, admiring how it brightened her face, how it off set the beautiful cream color of her skin. Never, had I wanted a single human being so much.

"I'll have a coke?" Bella said. Though she probably meant it as a statement, her insecurities made it sound more like a question. Thirst, a symptom of shock, finally a normal human response to everything, hopefully the drink and food would ease the symptoms.

"Two cokes." I replied, not bothering to look at the waitress. I was merely focused on Bella. She looked healthy, more than healthy, she looked radiant and I wondered why she couldn't seem to see how wonderful she really was. Why girls, because even the way the waitress was treating her, couldn't see her beauty or understand why I would even be interested in her. How could I not be? She was breathtaking.

"What?" She demanded, probably wondering why I was staring. _Excuse me, I just couldn't stop thinking about how breathtakingly beautiful you are. You have no idea the effect you have on me. _I hadn't even noticed that the waitress had left.

"How are you feeling?" I queried.

"I'm fine."

"You don't feel dizzy, sick, cold? Numb maybe?"

"Should I?" She asked, confused.

I smiled and watched her cheeks as they reddened once again. "I'm waiting for you to go into shock." I was waiting for her denial, for the stubbornness that I had bore witness too. She wouldn't want to be taken care of, though I would, gladly and I would make her let me.

Her eyes were unfocused, slightly glazed over and I wondered if this was her, dazzled. Vaguely I could remember this expression; it was one that often clouded her when I smiled at her. Was it merely as easy as that? I'd have to try it again, to see, when she was more calm, if this was the key. If it was, I would smile forever just to have that reaction.

"I don't think that will happen. I've always been good at repressing unpleasant things." She whispered, her voice weak, as though she had momentarily forgotten to take a breath.

I wondered if this had happened to her before, if she had been a victim of attack. Had that been what Jacob had done to her? What little I knew was that she didn't want to be around him, that Charlie was unaware of whatever it was and was still kind to the boy, and that Emmett hated him. I had seen his knee jerk reaction of a clenched fist whenever is name was brought up. Or, if that wasn't the case, was it more than that? True, her medical records had shown that she was always getting hurt, was that merely what she had meant?

"Just the same, I'll feel better once you have some food in you." I smiled again, my left lip curling up and I noticed that she once again had that glazed over look. I couldn't help but feel slightly accomplished at that.

"Yes, Dr. Cullen." I shuddered at my name on her tongue, enjoying the way it sounded.

The waitress returned with the cokes and a basket of bread and I couldn't help but notice that she brushed against me as she put them down on the table. I grimaced; couldn't they see that I was with someone? Was it that hard for these shallow women to think that Bella meant something to me? Why could they not see her as clearly as I did? How could they not see the beauty that I saw each time my gaze fell upon her.

"Can I get you anything?" She asked, attempting to catch my eye though I did not take them from Bella's sweet face. I flicked my hand, indicating to her that Bella was to be attended to first.

"Um…" She replied, looking down at the menu and biting her lower lip. "I'll have the mushroom ravioli."

"And you?" Amber, Ashley, Amanda… Whatever her name was, turned to look at me once more, her eyes giving away her lust.

"Lasagna." I barked, which startled her, and she walked briskly back to the kitchen, presumably shocked by my newfound attitude. I didn't want Bella to get the wrong idea, I didn't want her to think that I was interested in her, that I was basking in the attention that I was receiving tonight. The only attention that I craved was her own.

"You didn't have to be mean." She criticized, clearly leaving me confused.

"What?"

"The waitress… Really, you are sending out mixed signals; all smiling and dazzling one minute, cold the next." She seemed pensive for a moment as she took a long sip from her drink, her body shaking in the process. "That seems to be a pattern with you."

"I don't understand."

"You're just confusing is all; you're charming one minute and cold the next. It's rather infuriating." She shrugged, bringing the straw to her lips again. I watched her body shake once more as she placed the now empty glass down on the table, and I pushed my own towards her.

"Are you cold?" I didn't give her the chance to respond. I had already been shrugging off my own jacket, which I handed to her. "Put it on."

"You're rather demanding."

"I'm just looking out for you."

"I can take care of myself."

"I'm sure you can." I replied wryly, eliciting a glare from her as she held it in her hands.

"Thanks…" She muttered, putting it on and pushing up the too-long sleeves to free her hands. Was the evening finally settling in? Her color was still good; her skin looked like cream and roses against the deep blue of the shirt Alice had bought for her this morning.

"That color blue looks lovely with your skin." It wasn't a difficult compliment to make, it was the truth and I watched as the rosiness increased with her inability to accept a compliment. I pushed the bread towards her, motioning for her to eat something.

"I'm not going into shock… Really…"

"You should be… A _normal_ person would be going into shock. You don't even look like you're shaken by what has happened. I think _I _was more upset than you were."

"I feel safe when you're around." Her eyes met my own and I could see that they were so filled with trust again, a trust that I didn't deserve, not after my thoughts about what I wanted to do to those men. She could not trust a monster, and yet, for some reason, she did. How could I show her that I was bad for her, that I was not what she needed? I needed to push my selfish desires aside but I wasn't sure I could.

"This is slightly more complicated than I had anticipated." I said softly as she reached into the basket and pulled a piece of bread out, picking at it as she thought about what I had said.

A comfortable silence had fallen between us; well, a false comfortable silence. Though I had no idea what she was thinking, I was trying to think of something to say. I merely wanted to hear her sweet voice in my head once again. I was aware however, by her silence, that my comment had put her off. The waitress returned with our food and more drinks and I watched as she began to chew.

"Why did you stay here?" She finally asked.

"Stay where?"

"Port Angeles. You had plans with Jasper and you stayed here with me when I could have merely gone home with Emmett and Rosalie."

I thought for a moment, putting my fork back down on the plate as I looked at her. She was frowning slightly and my thoughts wandered. Her lips, her skin… They looked so soft and I wondered what they would feel like against my own finger tips. I wanted to touch her, to press my fingers against the corner of her frown and turn it up. I wanted her to smile again, her face looked so bright when she was smiling, it should never be marred with this frown.

"I was following you today…" I admitted. "I saw you walking down to the coffee shop." I was waiting for her to jump up and run out on me, telling her the truth was risky, might make her afraid of me, and though it was how my brain wanted her to feel, my heart would have been crushed. "You just don't seem to have good luck… And I've never been drawn to protect anyone like this and let me tell you, it's much more troublesome than I would have believed. But maybe it's just you. You seem to make it impossible to get through any day without a catastrophe and I've only known you for two days…"

I watched her, waiting for her reaction, and then she did the unthinkable. She smiled. Her lips curving up into the smile that I had longed to see. What was _wrong_ with this girl? I had just admitted to stalking her and she was smiling. Still, she didn't say anything and it worried me.

"You shouldn't be around me… I'm not good for you." I felt that my barriers had finally broken, the truth spilling recklessly from my mouth. It was true, and it angered me. I had been positioned over her life like the blade of a guillotine. It was as if she had been marked for death by some cruel, unjust fate. I could never be with her, I could never be around her and the fact that she seemed to _want_ me around… It was cruel. Fate was a jealous hag, vengeful and grisly. Maybe this was supposed to be _my_ punishment for my actions. Put before me was the very object of perfection and fate make her unattainable. It was unbearable, and I wanted someone, or something to be responsible for this, that way I could fight against it, so that I could find a way to make myself worthy.

"Yet here you sit across from me… Telling me that you can't be around me and yet you stayed."

"Yes…" I replied, bowing my head, my shoulders limp with shame.

"How did you know where to find me?"

"That was pure luck…" I replied. "Though I do feel connected with you… I had recalled where you had been, where the coffee shop was located. I figured that you had taken a wrong turn so I just drove the streets frantically. I kept my windows down and that was when I heard the men calling to someone…" I looked down at her plate and at mine. I had managed to eat enough, hers was still mostly untouched. "You eat, I'll talk."

"As I turned down the street I could see you standing there under the light, frozen in place like the prey." I covered my face with my hands, the feeling of anger washing over me once again and I didn't want her to see me that clearly, to see the monster on my face. I closed my eyes, fixing her image into my mind as I tried to calm myself, to steady my breathing. I thought about the delicate framework of her bones, her pale, creamy skin, her doe-like brown eyes. She was too vulnerable for this world, she needed a protector, and for some sick twisted reason, I was the closest thing available. Why had fate connected us? This could only end badly.

"It was hard Bella… So hard to just take you and to leave them, especially him, untouched. I thought hard about leaving you with Emmett and going back to settle things…" I looked up from the table to meet her eyes. She didn't _look_ scared. I wondered if I should continue. "I…"

I stopped myself, I couldn't tell her the truth, I needed to know that she wouldn't go running away. James had tarnished me for the rest of my life, he had made me incapable of ever accepting love. Because of him I was too afraid that if I loved someone too much they would be taken from me… Or they would leave me if they ever found out the truth… The truth of how mercilessly I had fought for his death. That, although I did not administer the drugs, he had died at my hands, and at the time, I had taken pleasure in that. Only a sick, monster of a human, could feel that way.

"Are you ready to go home?" I finally asked. Resolving to leave it at that for now.

"I'm ready to leave." Her voice was warm, and soft and it sent a soft chill down my spine.

I paid the bill quickly, ignoring the card that the waitress had put in there, the one with her name and phone number. There was no point in taking it, she would be expecting a call that she would never receive. When I stood, Bella quickly followed suit, the sleeves of my jacket falling back down and covering her small hands. I wanted to offer her my hand but I thought that it might be pushing my luck too much in one night.

I walked as close to her as I dared. Close enough that I could feel the warmth coming off her body and it was like a physical touch against the left side of my body. I reached the car before her, opening the door like the gentleman that Carlisle and Esme had raised me to be, but she merely sighed and I wondered why. Was she not use to someone doing such things for her, or did she not see me as a gentleman after tonight?

I closed the door after she had taken her seat and jogged to the driver's side. It was cold out and I knew that the car too would be cold. The sooner I started it the sooner the heater would be able to warm it, to warm her. I could stand the cold. It was only once the car had started that she finally spoke once again.

"Promise not to drive that fast ever again?"

Her question took me by surprise and I turned to face her before pulling out onto the now quiet street.

"What?"

"You were driving so fast earlier tonight…" She said quietly and I imagined that she was blushing again. "I'm not very good with speed."

"I always drive fast."

"You'll kill us, with my luck." She replied as I pulled out onto the street, making the quick turn onto the 101 South.

With her luck… I tried hard to suppress the laugh that was threatening to escape. Didn't she know that I would never let anything happen to her? Hadn't she figured that out? With my confession I had thought that was obvious. "We're not going to crash. I've never once been in an accident."

"_You've_ never been in a car with me."

"Touché. I'll keep it under seventy. Happy?" I responded, as she eyed the odometer.

"Almost…"

"I hate driving slow." I muttered, easing up on the gas.

"This is slow?" Her voice was shocked and I shook my head.

"Enough on my driving… Just trust me." I said impatiently, only later realizing that she wouldn't take kindly to that. I had after all told her that she _shouldn't_ trust me. I had to get my story straight in the future.

"I do… You were the one telling me earlier that I shouldn't."

I groaned slightly, she had picked up on that. "Why don't we talk about you for once…"

"Because there isn't anything to know about me." She replied, and I noticed that she was gripping the handle on the doorframe. She paused for a moment. "There's something about you that you aren't telling me."

"Does it really matter Bella?" I asked, hoping that she wouldn't implore further. She was much more observant than I had anticipated.

"If you don't want me around… If you think you're so bad… Don't I have the right to know so _I _can make that decision for myself." She was stubborn; still I would have to find a way around this.

"What if it's not what you think? What if what I have to tell you makes you run away from me?" I questioned.

"Then you'll only get what you say you want… Me to stay away from you… To be afraid of you." She replied, her eyes no longer focused on me but rather looking out the windshield.

"I'm not sure I'm ready to tell you…" I sighed.

"Then don't tell me to stay away from you. I don't think I can, it's too late for that now." She stated and my heart swelled. This was going to be a problem… I would have to do something about it soon, and yet, I wasn't sure I would be able to, I wasn't sure I would be strong enough to.

**A/N:**

**Hey guys! Extra long chapter as I'm in a good mood and apologizing for not posting last night… I was a bit too invested in the election results and though they came in VERY early… Much earlier than I had anticipated, my eyes were blurred with tears from Obama's very eloquent acceptance speech. I must say, I am very happy with the results of the nationwide election, though deeply saddened due to my state's prejudices and thought that equality is not a right but a privilege… I've debated this enough in my Con Law class today so I'm not going to say any further, as I'm sure there are people who disagree with my stance on Prop 8… I do accept that we are all entitled to our own opinions, I just feel that equality should be for all… Enough is enough though.**

**Anyways… I hope that you enjoyed the chapter. I was able to play with more of my own words and from here on out, there will be much more of my own work… As things **_**will**_** have to change as the story line will shift a bit, and the situations are different. I promise to get back to the dream though… **

**Thank you to my wonderful reviewers!**

**MyriadProBold: Thank you, though I can't take full credit for the entirety of that sentence as parts are taken from Midnight Sun… I just adapted it.  
ameeona  
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LivieLove****greenbuttonsx  
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SWChica2005  
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bloodredeclipse**

**Thank you all for your wonderful comments! I hope to receive just as many with this chapter! You all inspire me to continue with this story! And like I said, I hope that you enjoyed this one!**

**Have a great Thursday!**


	16. Chapter 16

**Baby You Can Stop Running  
Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight…**

**Chapter Sixteen**

**EPOV**

The heat in the car was overwhelming and I wasn't sure if I could blame it all on the heater. My body was going into overdriving having Bella that close; and the hot air radiating from the heater, clinging to her and sending her scent pulsing through the small space, seemed to intensify the sweetness of her scent and I felt the need to adjust myself in my seat. _That's embarrassing. I will you to stop. There will be none of that._ As though talking to my anatomy was going to do anything. She was intoxicating and she set my body on fire; this small, unintimidating, scared girl created a slow, pleasurable burn that caused an ache in my chest that was indescribable.

I once believed that there were only two ways of being in this world, two ways that a person could be made and no exceptions, good and bad. The good people in my life heavily outweighed the bad; Carlisle and Esme, who took me in without a second thought and loved me as one of their own, Alice who loved me unconditionally as her own brother, Jasper who, though he tried with all his will to get me to come out of my shell I never was able to, my parents, though I scarcely remember them in their entirety, I know that they loved me for that to be enough. The bad people had left their impression as well, and in so many ways, their pull was stronger. But now, here I was, stuck in this grey area, a place between good and evil and a place that had always been uncharted, unnavigable water. I was torn between my past indiscretions and my desire to be good, to be good enough for her. Was I even capable of it? Could I love, could I give her the love that she deserved when I couldn't scarcely love myself?

I glanced over towards her for a moment and noticed that she had fallen asleep, her long mahogany hair covered half her face like a curtain and I clenched my hand around the steering wheel in an attempt to not reach towards her and brush it away. I hated it when I couldn't look upon her beautiful face, when she tried to hide herself from the world. Aphrodite would never think to cover her beauty; Bella seemed to long to find a way to do so, always using her hair to cover her face, dipping her chin down to her chest, even occasionally hiding herself in the palms of her hands. My goddess had a complete lack of understanding of her own beauty and I wanted to be the one to show her, to make her understand. I shook my head slightly with the thought, I would never, ever have that chance, she wouldn't give me the chance because I knew once I divulged my past, she would turn away. I glanced at her once more, attempting to drink in as much of her as I could, trying to fix her into my memory so I could remember her long after she was gone.

"_Then don't tell me to stay away from you. I don't think I can." _ She had no idea what she was getting herself into. She moaned softly and my eyes darted back to her, watching as she changed her position in the seat, her head falling to my shoulder. I inhaled sharply as she nuzzled her nose against the fabric of my shirt and I cursed that I had worn long sleeves. I wanted to feel skin on skin contact, to feel her warm breath directly on my skin, not to feel it through the fabric of this damn shirt. A groan escaped my throat and I felt the blood rush to my groin once again. The proximity of her allowed me to smell more then I had before, for instance, the delicious smell of strawberries that came from her hair. I thought about leaning my head down and burying my nose in her hair, and I cursed the fact that the road was not accommodating to such desires. The self disgust began to flow through my veins, she was so innocent, and I was taking advantage of her, picturing her with all her abandon gone, picturing me with her… I cringed. _This will not due_. I turned my focus on to her, thankful that she was asleep, thankful that she seemed okay after the night's dramatics, thankful that I had gotten there in time because had I not, this moment would have only been a figment of my overactive imagination. _This is reality? Right?_ It had to be, if it were not, my imagination would have progressed much farther than this, she would have been in my arms, moaning my name and not asleep… _I'm a disgusting shell of a man to even be thinking such thoughts._

I drove slowly along the road, not because she had asked me to, but because I wasn't quite ready to bring her back home. I knew Emmett would be waiting up for her, but I wanted to keep her here with me, it was the only way I could be certain that she would be safe. I looked down at the odometer, forty five miles an hour, much, much, slower than usual, but I thought that I could go at this pace forever if it meant keeping her there. I resolved to always drive slowly when she was sitting in that seat, just another precaution, and an _easy_ precaution at that. I hated that I knew she wanted me around, it would make leaving a much harder task, I could push away my own selfish desires if she hated me.

I reached forward and pressed the seek button of the CD player, no longer enjoying the sound that was coming from the speakers. _Clair de Lune_ filled the small space and I relaxed into my seat, leaning my head to the side and pressing my cheek against the crown of Bella's head enjoying my recklessness. The hand that I reached forward was now resting against the far end of the console, my fingers just centimeters away from her left leg and I wondered if she would wake if I touched her. I _wanted_ to touch her, I wanted to feel her under the weight of my body, I wanted to press my lips against the gentle hollow of her neck, I wanted her writhing underneath me, begging me for more because she couldn't get enough of me. _Disgusting. I'm not a hormonal teenager, I must control these feelings. Worthless, worthless man, I am no better than her attackers._

I shook my head, my thoughts interrupted when I felt her arm wrap around mine effectively pulling herself closer to my side. She was still sleeping and as I looked down once more she looked so peaceful, so content, unlike her rest from the night before. What seemed to puzzle me the most however, was how, after everything that she had been through in this one day, could she still be so _calm_. She had been put through the winger, between speaking with her father, granted I knew nothing about the conversation, running into Jacob, and then those horrible pitiful excuses for men that had tried to hurt her. I shuddered for a moment as I thought about the night once more, though not wanting to wake her, not wanting my rage to return I focused my attention back to the angel that was holding onto my arm as though she were afraid I was going to leave. _Silly Bella, don't you know, don't you understand that I could never leave you if you wanted me to stay?_

"Edward…" She said, her warm breath causing goosebumps to appear on my covered arms, a pleasurable chill running from the base of my neck to the bottom of my spine. I shivered for a moment, relishing in the feelings that she gave me.

"Bella?" I whispered, unsure if she had woken up or if she was merely dreaming.

"I don't want you to go." She moaned and I wondered what she was talking about. I wasn't planning on going anywhere, I would stay by her side until she no longer needed me, until she no longer wanted me. "Don't leave… Edward I don't want to be alone."

She had abandonment issues, and I suppose that made sense; being taken away from her father and brother… Presumably this had something to do with Jacob as well. Was he not as good as he seemed? Did she truly not want him anymore? My heart swelled, my angel was afraid of being alone, but more importantly, she _wanted_ me. I suppose that shouldn't have been much of a revelation, she had after all, told me that she wouldn't stay away from me. I knew in that moment that I wouldn't be able to leave her, ever. She would have to leave me. And I was certain that she would, it was only a matter of time, I didn't deserve her.

"Your soul is made to love with the purity and passion of angels; but perhaps it can only love another angel, in which case I must tremble with apprehension." I whispered into her hair the words of Victor Hugo, amazed that I could even remember them… Still, it seemed fitting and I almost wished she could hear the words, could take them in. She would never love me the way I loved her, she would be incapable of it. I knew that for so many ways I would always regard her as my salvation, but that was because she _was _an angel. But just as the bird could never love the fish, the lion never love the lamb, the angel could never love the sinner. I sighed in my revelation, I would take the love she would give me, and I would give her more of myself than anyone would ever be able to have.

The music filled the silence and I sat there, one hand on the wheel, the other occasionally grazing the fabric of her jeans while I wondered what she was thinking, what she was dreaming about. The car plowed forward, like the beat of my heart, rapid one moment, calm and steady in another.

There was an unfamiliar car parked in front of the Swan's house when I drove into the driveway, the front bumper of the car a foot apart from the tailgate of Bella's red truck. As I turned the ignition off and she did not stir, I knew I would either have to wake her up, or I would have to carry her. As easily as I could, I slipped my arm from her grasp and inched away slowly, causing her to stir and sit up, her head no pressed against the back of the seat, her lips graced with a smile as though she knew what she had been doing all along.

"Where are we?" Her voice was thick with sleep and she looked up through her thick eyelashes at me and I felt my heart skip a beat.

"We are home." I replied, her eyes still looking at me with a mixture of exhaustion and confusion. True, it wasn't my home, though I felt as though it was. Strangely, I felt that anyplace where she was, was a place that I belonged. I felt brave knowing that she would probably never remember and I gave into the yearning to lean forward and press my lips against the soft skin of her forehead. I didn't fail to notice that she leaned into it. "Stay put."

I stepped out of the car and jogged to the other side, opening it and leaning down so I was level with her body. She leaned into me, allowing me to wrap my arms around her and in one quick movement, she was in my arms and out of the car. I used my hip to close the door before standing up straight once more, trying to find my breath, though it was impossible. Her arms were draped around my shoulders, her head buried in the crook of my neck, her lips just inches from my jaw, and then I felt her fingers in the soft hair on the nape of my neck. I fought back the groan that was building in the back of my throat, and looked towards the house.

I held her body close to me, my body involuntarily shaking each time she exhaled, her breath, warm against my neck. Though as I walked closer I saw a body slumped against the railing and I paused, taking a few steps back and surveying the area. The last thing she needed tonight was this, was him just sitting there. Before I had the chance to bring her back to the car, he sat up, his dark eyes glaring at me and then shifting to the girl who I was carrying in my arms. I felt my jaw tighten as he stood up and made his way over.

"What are you doing here?" I gritted through my teeth, my grip on her body tighter, as though I was afraid he was going to try and snatch her from me.

"I should be asking you that." He spat back.

"What part of leave her alone can you not get through your thick head?" I was growing angrier by the second.

"You really think that's what she wants?"

"I _know_ that's what she wants."

"Oh… Cullen to the rescue." He said sarcastically. "You've known her what, three days? I've known her for 20 years. I think that if anyone knows what's best for her, it's _me_."

"Edward what's going on?" She muttered into my neck and I pressed my eyes shut, hoping that she was merely talking in her sleep.

"Nothing's wrong." I whispered and looked to the door which was now being opened and Emmett's large body moving through the frame.

"Jacob." His voice was low but firm. "I told you to get the hell away from here." Jacob didn't seem to feel threatened because he merely stood there, his eyes glaring daggers at me, though I shrugged them off. She was, after all, in _my_ arms, not his. She was asking for me, _not_ him.

"If you don't get off this property I swear you'll live to regret it." Emmett had advanced closer and I watched as Jacob flinched slightly. "Remember what happened last time? It will be ten times worse and you'll need plastic surgery if you ever want to resemble a human being ever again."

"Bella." He spoke, ignoring the threats and I felt her stir, her grip around my neck loosening as she rubbed her eyes against my shirt. "Bella look at me."

"Go home Jake." I growled.

"Jake?" Bella questioned, lifting her head from my shoulder to meet my eyes. She looked torn, conflicted and confused. I wanted to press her head back against my chest, I wanted to rock her in my arms, I wanted to press my lips against her forehead again… But I was also filled with an inner longing to set her down and punch Jacob. I would concentrate on the first three desires.

"I won't let him near you if that's what you want." I said and she nodded her head and I looked from her soft face which was once again resting against my chest, back to him. "You got your answer, leave." I didn't wait for another response and instead brushed past him and Emmett, bringing her into the warm house.

"Is the dog still out there?" I heard a female voice ask which startled me, until I turned around and saw Rosalie sitting on the couch.

"Dog?" I questioned and moved into the living room, sitting down though never letting her out of my arms. The feel of her arms wrapped around my neck, the gentle rise and fall of her chest, the intoxicating scent of her body that was so close… I couldn't bring myself to let go, I didn't want to, and I wasn't sure what I was going to do when I had to leave.

"That worthless excuse of a man that Bella use to date." She snarled and I chuckled.

"I take it you don't like him much."

"I've never really met him." She admitted but shrugged as though it didn't matter and I lifted an eyebrow, wondering if she would tell me anything else. "Emmett told me the whole story and anyone who treats a woman like that… Especially one like the one that has you so obviously whipped in two days, doesn't really deserve to be treated as anything other than a dog."

"I'm not whipped." I stated, my heart racing. I was trying so hard to not make it obvious. "It's not like that."

She grunted and shook her head. "You should stop lying to yourself… I'm not judging… You're not worse off than Emmett. I trained him early too."

"So now I'm trained?" His voice came through as he looked at her, an amused expression on his face.

"Like you didn't already know." She grinned and he just smiled back at her, falling down on the couch.

"I swear if that kid comes around here one more time I'm going to personally make sure he will never walk again." He snarled, but Rosalie just moved closer to him and I watched as he visibly relaxed at her presence.

"I want to go to bed…" Bella's voice mumbled against my shoulder and I realized that somehow I had begun to stroke her hair, feeling it's soft, silky strands through my fingers. I glanced up and my eyes met Emmett's questioning glance. What would I say to him? What _could_ I say to him? It was obvious that I was already terrible at hiding my feelings. Rosalie, who had been around us twice had already seen past my façade. I must be losing my touch.

"I can take her if you want…" He said, pausing for a moment, his eyes raking over us. "Though I'm not sure she would let me pry her from you." He was chuckling now.

"What are you talking about?" I asked, standing up slowly once more, putting at much of the weight in my knees.

Emmett grinned and stood up and walked over. "Come on Bella let me bring you to bed." His hand was resting on her shoulder.

"No." She mumbled like a petulant child and I felt my heart race. "I don't want you Emmett." Rosalie was laughing and I noticed that Emmett's eyes were lit with amusement.

"Come on Bells, you _need _to go to bed."

"NO." She said more forcibly, her grip around my neck tightening and when Emmett moved one arm under her own arms, she untangled one arm and smacked him away. "I don't want you Emmett."

"I think the child has spoken." Emmett laughed and closed the distance between him and Rosalie in a few strides. As he sat down, I watched as he pulled her into his side and she tangled her legs with his own. "Upstairs, first bedroom on the right."

I laid Bella down in her bed and moved towards her dresser, looking for something that she would wear that would be more comfortable than her clothes. Emmett appeared in the doorway and observed my actions.

"I'll get her changed, you should go home and get some sleep." His voice was low but full of authority. Emmett was playing the father role… And could I blame him? So I nodded. There was no use in getting on his bad side.

"Edward don't leave." Her voice interrupted and we both turned to see her sitting up, the weight of her body resting on the palms of her hands.

"You need to sleep." I said, holding back the emotion that I knew was probably evident.

"I don't want to be alone."

"Silly Bella, you aren't alone. Emmett will be here." I responded and moved to her side. I let my finger graze the white bandage on her chin. "You're safe."

She sighed, her eyes meeting mine and not leaving them. "It's late. Too late for you to drive home." She was begging now and I felt the strings on my heart pull, the slow, steady ache returning as I knew that I had to leave. Emmett did not want me to stay, and that I could understand. She leaned closer, her head against my shoulder. "I want you to stay with me… I don't want you to leave."

"Here Bella, put these on." Emmett interrupted, putting them down on the bed. "Edward can I talk to you?"

I sighed and followed Emmett out of the room, giving Bella the privacy she would need to change.

"I'll leave Emmett." I said, and he sighed.

"You don't have to leave Edward… I just want you to know that she is fragile and she's had her heart broken pretty terribly and the last thing I want is for it to happen again. I feel like we, Charlie and I, are just finally getting her back and I don't want to lose her again."

"I don't want to hurt her. I couldn't hurt her…"

"I know…" Emmett responded, his hand on my shoulder. "Goodnight."

I wanted him to tell me to leave, to give me an excuse to leave her side because without it, I knew I would stay. I knocked on the door and received no response, so I slowly opened it, my head peaking in and seeing that she was under the covers, her clothes strewn across the floor. I walked in and closed the door behind me, my pace to the bed slow and steady, waiting to see if she would stir.

"Bella?" I questioned, my voice barely above a whisper.

"I'm awake." She replied and I realized that she was crying. I closed the gap between us in a matter of moments and sat down on the bed next to her. She moved closer, her hand tentatively touching my arm. "Will you stay with me?"

"I'll stay with you tonight." I replied, holding my arms out and watching as she moved into them, her head resting against the nook in my chest, her tears creating a water stain on my shirt. I suppose the shock was finally settling in, and I was torn between happiness that I was there, and a feeling that maybe I was getting myself into something deeper than I should have been.

Still, I knew that I would not allow myself to sleep, nor would I be there when she woke. If I was able to wake up next to her, there would be no turning back and I wasn't prepared for that yet. I still had to hold out hope that I would be able to leave her if I had to, and I wasn't sure I would be able to do that if I woke up with her, if I could see the way she looked when the morning light touched her face for the first time… I would settle with the dream of what it might look like in my head, and hope that somehow, once she learned the truth, that she would find a way to love me, regardless of all my many flaws and the monster hidden deep within me.

**A/N:**

**Wow, haven't written an entire chapter in one person's POV in a while… Once again, this is kind of just a filler chapter. I couldn't just leave the last chapter as it was… There had to be some kind of closure on the day… Still, it observes Edward a little more… And quite obviously the next chapter will be predominantly Bella… Waking up alone… And what not… There will be more Twilight plot line coming up in the next chapter as well! **

**Thank you to all my fantastic reviewers!**

**CullenGirl225  
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**You all are fantastic!**

**The next chapter is going to take a little bit longer probably… I'm going to have to put to use my journalistic talents that have been hidden away for a LONG, LONG time… I haven't written anything resembling a newspaper blurb since high school when I was an editor for the school paper… So that was almost four years ago. But, regardless, the next chapter will result in Bella making some discoveries though not the WHOLE story… **

**Please let me know what you thought of the new chapter! I'm excited to hear from you all! You make my day!**


	17. Chapter 17

**Baby You Can Stop Running  
Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or the characters. All that belongs to Stephanie Meyer!**

**Chapter Seventeen**

**BPOV**

I heard the door to the bedroom open, the light from the hall casting a soft glow. I had been crying and I had no idea why. There were plausible reasons, things that could have presumably caused the tears to run down my cheeks at the rapid rate that they were but I'm not sure that _those _where the reasons for them. The tears hadn't started until Edward left the room with Emmett. My balance, my center, had been thrown for a loop and I was terrified that he wouldn't come back. I _needed _him if I planned on getting through the night.

I had never had a knight in shining armor, though I had read about them countless amounts of times. I always wondered what it might be like to have one around, to be the center of someone's world, to have someone love you so much that they would do almost anything for you. Maybe this was what Edward was for me; maybe he was my knight in shining armor. He was definitely not what I had expected; he was so much more than that and I wasn't sure what it was that he could possibly see in me. Still… I knew, from his words, that he had some kind of connection to me. "_I was following you today… I saw you walking down to the coffee shop. You just don't seem to have good luck… And I've never been drawn to protect anyone like this and let me tell you, it's much more troublesome than I would have believed. But maybe it's just you. You seem to make it impossible to get through any day without a catastrophe and I've only known you for two days…_"

"Bella?" His voice was whisper soft but still sounded like smooth velvet.

" I'm awake." I choked out in my attempt to hide the fact that I was crying. I didn't want him to see me like this; I didn't want him to know that I was upset over him leaving, though he would probably feel some kind of relief as his assumption would be that the tears were caused from the course of the day. He was by my side in a few seconds and sitting on the bed next to me, so quick even that I hadn't heard the sound of his feet against the carpet. My only reassurance that he was there was the groove in the bed and the warmth of his body as he moved closer. I took a shaky breath, and placed my hand on his arm, the familiar energy that I always felt as we touched shot through my body. "Will you stay with me?"

"I'll stay with you tonight." He said solemnly. He moved down on the bed so his head was resting on a pillow. He opened his arms and I moved closer letting my head rest in the gentle nook of his chest as I felt his arms collapse around me. Nothing had ever felt more perfect than how I felt in his arms. There was no comparison to any other time that I had spent wrapped up in Jakes arms all those years ago. With Edward, everything just seemed to fit. I buried my nose in his shirt; breathing in his scent and wishing that I could commit it to memory, or at least find a way to bottle it so I could smell it whenever I felt the need. Though, that might only create an addiction but maybe I was way past that. In two days, Edward had become almost the center of my world, he had become the balance that I was so completely unaware that I even needed and I realized that I wasn't sure what I would do without him anymore. I _needed_ him to survive. For the first time, I felt whole.

I could hear him whispering something in the dark though his words were murmured and I couldn't understand what it was he was saying exactly though it sounded distinctly like a song. I closed my eyes and snuggled my head deeper into his chest, his head falling down upon the crown of my head. I wanted to speak to him, to continue talking. I was vaguely aware that he had something that he wanted to tell me but was afraid to. I just wanted him to know that there was nothing in the world that he could have done that would make me feel any way different about him. There was no changing this, I was in too deep and my body would never let me resurface again, my body called to him.

"Bella?" I heard his voice break the silence. I thought about talking but I decided to not say anything. Maybe he would be more vocal if he thought I was sleeping. It was a terrible trick to play but I felt as though I had no other choice. I wanted to know, I _needed _to know what it was that he thought was so bad, that I would run away from him. I felt his hand as it rubbed my back softly. "Are you awake?"

I bit down on my tongue, desperately trying to keep myself from saying anything but his voice was so tempting, so alluring that I wasn't sure what to do. I felt his lips against the top of my head and my throat tightened and my body stiffened. "Do I scare you that much?" His voice was still calm and soft and I turned slightly and lifted my chin so I could see him, his eyes fixated on my own and I forgot to breathe.

"Breathe Bella." He smiled and I did. There were so many things that my body was feeling, so many things that I wanted to tell him but I was afraid to. What if he wasn't as invested as I was, what if his pull wasn't as strong as mine was? Was it even logical to find something this powerful with a person in such a short period of time? It seemed so implausible, so unreal that I could feel all this for someone who I barely even knew. Was this how Romeo and Juliet had felt? "_O, she doth teach the torches to burn bright! It seems she hands upon the cheek of night like a rich jewel in Ehiope's ear, beauty too rich for use, for earth too dear! So shows a snowy dove trooping with crows, as yonder lady o'er her fellows shows. The measure done, I'll watch her place of stand, and, touching hers, make blessed my rude hand. Did my heart love till now? Foreswear it, sight! For I ne'er saw true beauty till this night._"

"I'm not scared of you." I whispered. "I'm scared of how you make me feel."

He chuckled at that and I savored the sound, knowing that it wouldn't last long, he would go back to brooding in a matter of moments when he allowed the truth in my words to sink in. His behavior earlier in the car only alerted me to the fact that he did not want me to like him, and my confession was going to disappoint him.

Which was why I was so surprised when his arms around my waist tightened, effectively bringing us even closer together than we already were, and I felt my lips brush against his warm neck. My heart was racing in my chest from the closeness, my body feeling as though a thousand nerve endings were backfiring, sending millions of tiny electric shocks all over my body. This was what scared me. This was not possible. Feeling like this was a sure sign of my insanity.

"How do I make you feel Bella?" I felt his warm breath on my ear and my breath hitched. He was more open than I had ever imagined, this reaction was not at all what I had been expecting and it was what frustrated me most about him. How could he be so calm, so serene in one minute and then change into his cold, distant behavior?

"I… Um…" I stuttered. How could I find the words to describe how he made me feel? It was impossible. It was like trying to count all the stars in the sky. He chuckled again.

"Please breathe Bella… I wouldn't want to be convicted of a murder for your inability to inhale and exhale." His chuckle was gone however after the words had been spoken and his eyes darkened.

"I'm breathing… It's not my fault that you dazzle me." I responded weakly, still out of breath.

"We'll have to work on that then."

"I thought you didn't want to be around me."

"I never said that Bella… I said that it would be more prudent for you to stay away from me." His hand reached forward and brushed a few strands of hair off my forehead and I closed my eyes at his touch. "You should sleep Bella… You must be tired." I merely nodded my agreement and moved my head back down so I was more comfortable and drifted off to sleep to the feel of his fingers as he rubbed small circles on my back.

_I was running. Running away from something that I couldn't see, but I could hear Edwards voice clearly in my head telling me to run and to run far away. How was I not tripping? The trees blurred past me as the tears poured down my cheeks. Internally I was feeling something though in my haste I hadn't taken the time to consider what it was, and then it hit me. Fear. _

_I turned my head to look to my side. Hadn't Edward been there? Where had he gone? And then, my body crushed into something hard and I heard a laugh that sent a chill from the base of my neck to the bottom of my spine. It was as though something cold had taken over completely. I felt arms wrap around me, keeping me from meeting the forest floor and when I composed myself I looked up into the eyes of the person holding me and nearly shrieked in terror._

"_Who are you?" I asked. He was the same man from earlier. The same man that had haunted my dream asking me if I was with Edward though I could see him more clearly in the light that penetrated the thick forest. I was cold though I no longer knew if it was from the chilly air around me, or if it was radiating from the man before me._

_He let out a low groan as he brought his head down to my hair and I heard him breathe me in. I struggled to escape his grasp but it was no use. Who was this man and how did he know Edward? How did he know me? What did he want with me? _

_I was certain that the fear shone brightly though my eyes. And then I heard it, his voice, loud and clear._

"_Not her!"_

"Bella!" I heard his voice again and I felt someone shaking me awake. "Bella wake up."

"Edward?" I asked as I heard him let out an audible sigh.

"It's okay, it was only a nightmare." He spoke and pulled himself up from the bed.

"Where are you going?" I questioned, my voice quivering. The dream had been all too real and I didn't want him to leave. I wasn't sure I would even go back to sleep if he wasn't there.

"I'm not going anywhere. I'm just changing to get more comfortable." He stated as he began to unbutton his shirt.

I couldn't take my eyes off of him and I stared at him as his long, slender fingers slid the buttons from their holes until his shirt was open. I was slightly disappointed to see that he had an undershirt on. He looked up and his eyes met mine and the heat filled my cheeks in a deep blush which had him chuckling. I turned away quickly, burying my head in the pillow as I heard his belt come off. My heart was racing and a few minutes later I felt a cool breeze of air as I looked up and watched as he lifted the blankets and moved under them, his body merely inches from my own. I froze. It had been so long since I had actually shared a bed like this before.

I felt him move closer, his arms reaching out for me and I moved closer but my body was rigid and I saw his brow furrow.

"What's wrong?"

"N-Nothing." I stuttered .

"I'm not going to hurt you." His voice was soft and angelic and my body reacted before I had the chance to, pushing me closer against his body, tangling my leg between his own. I could feel everything now. His cool legs against my warm ones, the hard muscles of his chest.

"I trust you." I whispered and closed my eyes once more.

"I'll never leave you Bella…" He spoke so soft that I wasn't sure I heard it correctly, before I found sleep once more.

**EPOV**

I had every intention of leaving her side around five in the morning, however when I felt her body go rigid against my own, and her breathing speed up I knew that there was no way that I could. She started to whimper and I wondered, only momentarily, if she might have been having a pleasant dream, though when the dry sob broke through her small mouth, I knew that it was a nightmare.

I pulled away and put my hands on her shoulders. "Bella!" I began to shake her, trying to rouse her from whatever the dream was that she was having. I hated to see her in distress . "Bella wake up."

Her eyes fluttered open and she whispered my name. I let out an audible sigh as apparently I had failed to breathe in the minute that it took me to wake her.

"It's okay. It was only a nightmare." I replied as I pulled myself up off the bed. If I was going to stay with her I would have to change out of my jeans and shirt. It was the only way I could be comfortable.

"Where are you going?" Her voice quivered and I knew that there was no way I could leave. She needed me. I couldn't leave her when she was so clearly upset by whatever it had been that she had dreamt of.

"I'm not going anywhere. I'm just changing to get more comfortable." I stated as I began to unbutton the shirt that I was wearing. I could feel her eyes on me and I felt a blush in my cheeks. What if she didn't like what she saw when she saw it? What if she was afraid that I was going to try and take advantage of the situation? A hundred thoughts were going through my mind and before I knew it the shirt was off and I was looking up, my eyes meeting her own as a blush of her own appeared on her cheeks. I felt something stir within me but I quickly thought about something else. Tonight was not about that. Tonight was about protecting her, about making her feel safe. She turned away quickly, her face buried in the pillow as I quickly unbuckled my belt and stepped out of my jeans before sliding in next to her.

"What's wrong?" I asked, noticing that her body was stiff as I reached out and pulled her into me.

"N-Nothing." She stuttered.

"I'm not going to hurt you." I whispered and in that moment she was flush against my body, her leg tangled between my own and I fought back every desire that was suddenly pulsing through my body. I could not resolve to passion. I could not scare her. I _would not_ scare her.

"I trust you." She muttered against my chest and I savored the feeling of her warm breath against my it.

"I'll never leave you Bella." I said softly, fighting the urge to seal my words with a soft kiss upon her head. My heart was racing in my chest at her closeness, at the feel of her body pressed so tightly against my own. She fit perfectly; it was as though she was made for me.

I cast my eyes down towards her and looked at her as the soft light from the silver moon illuminated her pale skin. She was beautiful, not a soul could hold a candle to her and I wondered what I had done to deserve to have such an angel asleep in my arms.

How had this feeling come to me? Where had the passion that was building for this girl developed? How was it possible to feel so strongly for another human being in only a few short days? I had always despised Romeo, always despised his so called "love" for Juliet though having her in my arms, I wondered if there was more to it than that. Maybe he really had loved her after all. Was this the kind of love that Shakespeare was writing about? I never believed that it could exist but she was making me question everything that I had ever known.

"_Arise, fair sun, and kill the envious moon, who is already sick and pale with grief, that thou her maid art fair more fair than she: be not her maid, since she is envious; her vestal livery is but sick and green and none but fools wear it; cast it off. It is my lady, O, it is my love! O, that she knew she were! She speaks yet she says nothing; what of that? Her eye discourses; I will answer it. I am too bold, 'tis not to me she speaks: two of the fairest stars in all the heaven, having some business, do entreat her eyes to twinkle in their spheres till they return. What if her eyes were there, they in her head? The brightness of her cheek would shame those stars, as daylight doth a lamp; her eyes in heaven would through the airy region stream so bright that birds would sin and think it were not night. See, how she leans her cheek upon her hand! O, that I were a glove upon that hand, that I might touch that cheek._" I recited his words from memory, not sure if I had even said them all correctly though in the first time in my life, they seemed to take on another meaning. For the first time in my life, I understood Romeo.

Would our ending be just as tragic? Was there any other option?

I closed my eyes and allowed sleep to take me, hoping that I would wake before her so I would not find myself unable to ever part from her. My pull to her was stronger than ever.

**BPOV**

The dark light of the cloudy morning hit my face, effectively pulling me from my dreams and back into reality. I rolled over, my body searching for the body that I remember being there when I fell into my deep and restful sleep, though he was not there, nor was there a warm spot where his body would have been. My eyes flew open as I searched around the room, my eyes falling on the rocking chair, the floor, the closet, still, he was nowhere in sight. _Was it all just a dream? Just a vivid dream?_ I wanted to scream, to cry, to do anything but I was frozen in place. Where had he gone? He had promised that he would never leave me.

My eyes fell upon the bedside table where a small piece of paper was folded, and as my eyes took in the elegant script, I knew exactly who had written it.

_Bella,_

_I'm sorry that I could not be there when you woke but I could not stay any longer. Rest, you need it. Doctors orders. I'll be by later to check on you, make sure you haven't gone into a delayed shock._

_Edward_

I sat up, and my head spun for a minute as the blood flowed downward. Maybe I should have taken more time, actually taken my time when it came to sitting up. Apparently my equilibrium was off, not that that was surprising in anyway. I pulled myself from the bed and placed the note on the desk by the computer. I thought seriously about turning it on, about looking into Edwards past, the past that he seemed to not want to share with me. Would it be that easy? I knew barely anything about him, only that Carlisle and Esme had adopted him when he was young, that he had lived in Chicago before his parents had died.

Both parents died. It hit me then. Their death had not been an accident. Was this the secret that he was trying so hard to hide from me? How could their death be his fault? How could that make me turn away from him in fear? I pressed the power button on the computer, just in case I resolved to look him up. What could I do though; Cullen was Carlisle's last name, his adopted last name. Where would I even begin?

I grabbed the towel that hung on the back of my door and tossed it over my shoulder before padding my way to the shower, and noticed that the house was quiet. Emmett and Rosalie must have gone out… Or maybe they were still sleeping. I didn't want to check, afraid of what my delicate eyes might witness.

The shower didn't last nearly as long as I hoped it would. Even taking the time to blow-dry my hair, something I rarely did, and only consented to it because there was nothing better to do. All that was left for the day was to sit around and wait, maybe stop by the hospital and see if Charlie was feeling any better… Maybe see if Edward had gone in today, against Carlisle's wishes. I wrapped the towel around my body once more and moved back into my room, glancing out the window. Both Emmett and Rosalie's cars were in the driveway. They must still be sleeping.

I dressed slowly, my eyes taking in the clothes that I had packed, and I realized that I should have brought more things with me. I was no longer sure how long I would be staying in Forks, I was no longer sure I ever wanted to leave Forks ever again. I would stay there forever if it meant I was with Edward. I pulled my jeans out and slipped them on, followed by a simple black tee-shirt. Happy, that unlike the one that Alice had chosen, I did not feel quiet as exposed.

The old computer hummed with a force that almost made me laugh. My lap top in San Francisco was so quick, so quiet, that this machine seemed prehistoric. The internet had always been slow here. Charlie never thought to buy a new modem, even after all these years, and the dial up was terribly slow. I pressed the button, allowing the connection to start. I would go eat and hopefully when I returned, it would be ready.

I ate slowly, chewing each bite with care and when I was done, I washed the bowl and spoon, letting them rest in the rack next to the sink to dry. My feet dragged as I climbed the stairs, my body was still tired though I wasn't sure if it was from the travel, my hectic schedule, or if I was just depressed that Edward had not stayed like I had anticipated. I reached for my iPod that was sitting on the dresser and turned it on before placing the headphones on. I didn't want to be disturbed.

With a sigh, I turned to my computer. Naturally, the screen was covered in pop-up ads, a result of the free browser that I used. I sat down in the hard chair and began to close the annoying boxes, each one a bright vivid color that seemed almost blinding.

Eventually I made it to Google and I sighed again as I wondered what I could type. "Carlisle Cullen" my fingers had a mind of their own as I began to recall how I had done research back in college. There were a few results that had popped up; the usual ones which stated his credentials, where he was working… And then, I feel upon a page that seemed to be a newspaper article from a few years back. I placed the cursor on it and clicked, watching as the screen was brought up.

**Dr. Carlisle Cullen Bestowed with High Honors**

_Dr. Carlisle Cullen has been awarded high honors by his peer group. Recently he has been bestowed the honor of one of the nation's top neurosurgeon's. A widely published doctor, who has helped advance the field, his years of teaching have finally seemed to pay off. Though he is humbled by the experience and has stated, "I have done what anyone else would have. It is my job to find cures, just as it is another's job to teach the children of the world. It is a matter of what we can do collectively, not what we can do as an individual. We must continue working together because only then can we become an effective society." _

_Dr. Cullen was awarded this honor on June 20, 2005 in Seattle, Washington. With him, to celebrate in his accomplishments were his wife Esme Cullen, daughter Alice Cullen and their adopted son, Edward Masen, the son of the late Dr. Edward Masen Sr. who had been a close personal friend of Dr. Cullen._

Edwards name had been Edward Masen. I returned to the Google website and typed, "Edward Masen Jr."

There were no results for his name, though there were thousands about his father. I moved the cursor when I found an article that looked promising.

**Brutal Murder of Politician and Accomplished Doctor**

_June 11, 1992_

_Budding politician, and state senator of Illinois, Elizabeth Masen was brutally gunned down along with her husband upon leaving a charity event for the Children's Memorial Hospital in Chicago. Elizabeth Masen and her husband, Dr. Edward Masen are survived by their ten-year-old son Edward Anthony Masen Jr. A memorial service will be held June 15._

I read carefully though other articles, though there was never any other information regarding what had happened. Only that the murderer had been someone by the name of James Anderson. Aggravated that nothing seemed to yield any conclusive results, that nothing seemed to give me any insight as to who Edward was, I snapped off the computer's main power, not shutting it down properly. It was old as it was, I would just get another one if I ever needed it. Through my haste, I felt an overwhelming sense of embarrassment. This was all so stupid. I was prying into his life. A life that I had no business prying into. It would be his choice to tell me of his past, just as it would have to be my choice to tell him of my own. Something, that I knew I couldn't put off much longer, with Jacob's continued presence, he would only grow more curious and I was never one to tell a good lie.

I had to get out of the house, but there was nowhere I wanted to go that didn't involve a long drive. I pulled on my shoes anyways, unclear as to where I was going to go. I grabbed my keys when I went downstairs and pulled on a heavy coat. It was overcast though it had not begun to rain, yet.

I got into my car and pulled out of the driveway and just drove. The small town made it hard though, it seemed that as soon as I was on one side and my thoughts were beginning to make sense, I would have to turn around, which only made me push my resolutions to the side. It was no use. I pulled off the main road and parked, locking the truck behind me as I made my way to the coffee shop. Maybe caffeine would make it better. At least I was out of the house, at least I didn't have to continue turning around as the town ended. I could sit there and just, think.

"Bella!" I heard the voice call as I opened the door and she was by my side before I could even shrug off my jacket. "Are you okay?"

"I'm fine Alice." I smiled and placed it on a table. "Sorry for making you worry… Did Edward make it home okay?"

"Yeah, I saw him come into the house this morning but I think he went to the hospital." She smiled and we both took a seat.

"Non-fat latte" I said, as I smiled up at the waitress as she took my order before walking away. "So where's Jasper?"

"Oh he's still sleeping, but I just didn't feel like staying in… And I had a feeling I might run into you here."

"I'm actually kind of happy to see you…" I said softly. I wanted to ask her about Edward, to ask her what might have happened, what it was that he was hiding. Though I never expected her to tell me everything, even just something small would help.

"What's up?" She smiled.

"I had a question about Edward actually…" I started and she frowned slightly. "I understand if you don't want to tell me… It's just he's so confusing and I don't understand him at all."

"I can't tell you about Edwards past… It's not my story to tell. All I can tell you is that he has been pretty reclusive for the past five years… So much so that he's almost been difficult to be around. But he's different when you're around… It's like he's happy again." She shrugged.

"I'm sure there is more to that than me." I said solemnly.

"I'm pretty sure you have been the one to bring him out of whatever it is that he's been in."

"But he still is quiet." I stated. "I've tried to talk to him, to ask him about what is wrong but he keeps telling me that he's not good for me… That I should stay away from him."

"But you can't." She said, her eyebrow lifting as she eyed me curiously.

"No. I don't think I can."

"He'll tell you." She smiled.

"How can you know that?"

"Because I'm Alice, and I know everything." She was grinning now and I smiled back at her.

"So he's at the hospital?" I asked.

"Last I heard."

"I should go check on Charlie." I said, finishing my drink and placing a few bills down on the table.

"You should do that." There was a twinkle in her eye that surprised me, but I did my best to ignore it.

"I'll see you later?"

"Later tonight I predict." She replied and I shook my head.

"Bye Alice." I didn't even give her the chance to respond before I was out the door, my heart racing in my chest. I had to tell him about my past… Maybe if I did, he would open up about his own and he could see that it wasn't him who wasn't worthy of me, but rather me who was unworthy of him.

**A/N:**

**I'm sooo sorry that it's taken so long to get this out to you guys! I've been slammed smack dab in the middle of a really, really, crappy week! Everything and anything that could be due is due for me and I'm so far behind because of my computer problems. But it doesn't matter… I got a new chapter! I'm happy with the beginning though towards the end, I don't know it just seemed a little rushed. Still, it was important to me that I gave you all something so you didn't think I abandoned you! **

**I just want to say WOW with the amounts of responses that I got for the last chapter! You guys are amazing! Please keep it up! You will make my crappy week bearable! **

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**Preview: So basically Bella is going to tell Edward… But will Edward tell Bella? Oh, and I'm toying with the idea of going to the meadow! You'll have to wait to find out!**


	18. Chapter 18

**Baby You Can Stop Running  
Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight**

**Chapter Eighteen**

**Jacob's POV**

I stomped into the office of my shop and threw my weight into my chair; it jolted back hard with my body weight before adjusting to it. I didn't care. I could have broken it and it wouldn't have mattered, hell, I wouldn't have cared if I got hurt in the process. At least then I would have had an excuse to go to the hospital. Besides, Bella was always sympathetic to the hurt. If I was able to injure myself then maybe she would at least come and talk to me, let me explain what had prompted my behavior all those years ago.

I guess I never really believed that she was pregnant; we had only had sex three times. Three times and she became pregnant? It just didn't seem possible. We had taken all the necessary precautions, and okay, the condom broke that _last _time that we had, but it was one, tiny mistake. Surely it hadn't been enough to knock her up. But then, when she came to me and we went to our spot at the beach and she told me she was. How was I _supposed_ to react?

I think I figured that she had been trying to secure me, to trap me, to make me belong to her and only her. It was vain, and maybe I was vain then, maybe even now I'm still just as vain. But I was sixteen for Christ sake and I wasn't completely unaware of the looks that girls gave me. Still, I knew I loved Bella, even then, I just figured that with her leaving for California that maybe we would have an open relationship, and when she came home for holidays it would be just us again. Sick thought… I know that now at least.

Letting Bella leave without talking to her had been the biggest regret of my life. It just took me a while to figure that out. The thing is, seeing her for the first time since she left for California knocked the wind right out of me and I hadn't been expecting that. Mainly because as the time passed I began to think less about her, to think less about what had happened between us. I had been able to push it back into the depths of my mind, to bury it along with all the other crap things I had ever done in my life, with all the other past regrets. If I was going to be honest with myself, I would have to admit, that Bella was the biggest regret of my life. Not our relationship, but the way that I ended our relationship. I had let the best thing that I had ever had, slip through my fingers like a child playing with sand.

I guess time does that to you; you don't heal per say, but you find other ways to make the pain more bearable, until in one brief moment it all comes rushing right back. I should have been expecting her to come back, it seemed logical with the events that had taken place over the past two weeks. What with the shooting and Charlie's injury. I knew better than to think Bella would continue to stay away when her father needed her. Still, two weeks had passed and she hadn't shown up.

Dad had asked me in passing more than once why she hadn't come. He thought we were still in touch. I didn't have the heart to tell him that I had knocked her up, at least, I think I knocked her up, and then told her to get an abortion, effectively ending all communication that we had ever had. Dad had loved Bella like his own daughter, and I know that he and Charlie were hoping that one day we would tie the knot and make it official. How could I tell him that I had fucked it all up, both literally and figuratively? So I told him I knew nothing, though I knew the truth. Emmett had been kind enough to inform me about that in our first December apart.

"_Hey Emmett." I shouted from across the street as I saw him walking closer. I had been so wrapped up in what I had been doing that I failed to take notice of his face, the dark look that had taken over him as his strides drew him closer. _

"_You have some nerve." He spat and I looked up, dropping the part that was in my hand, his tone surprising me. I was taller than Emmett, though not by much, but he was much bigger, stronger and all my senses were telling me to stand guard._

"_What?" I questioned, my eyes trying to hide the truth. I knew what he was talking about. I guess I thought Bella wouldn't tell anyone, or that maybe it had all just been a misunderstanding, a false positive._

"_You think I don't know what happened with Bella?" My eyes were wide. "You knock her up and tell her to get an abortion. I'm sure Billy would be real proud of you. Do you have any idea what she's been though? No, I suppose you don't because you haven't even bothered to call her." _

_I didn't have the time to react; his fist made contact with my jaw, and then again with my eye. _

"_Stay away from her. Don't ever try and get in contact with her. And stay away from the rest of my family." He shouted before turning his back on me, clenching and unclenching his fist as he walked away and out of sight while I pressed the sleeve of my shirt against my nose trying to stop the bleeding._

So when I saw her in the bar, I was surprised to say the least. I hadn't been expecting to ever see her again; I figured she was done with Forks, done with me. It was one of the reasons that I had stopped thinking about her all together. But she came back, and like a boomerang, so did my feelings for the small girl mixed in with the crowd. My throat tightened, my stomach queasy with nerves, and I gripped the beer in my hand so hard that I was almost surprised that it hadn't shattered.

I had stood back with Sam, Quil and Embry watching her from a distance as she spoke with Angela and her boyfriend Ben; I watched as she spoke with Alice Cullen and Jasper Whitlock. I looked at her, well, maybe stared at her; I watched the way her eyes lit up when she laughed, the way her pale cheeks flushed red when someone spoke of something that embarrassed her, I looked at the curves of her body and longed to wrap my arms around her. I missed her in that moment, missed the smell of her strawberry shampoo, missed the comfort of her arms wrapped around me, the taste of her kisses on my lips and tongue, the way she use to look at me with such love, the way she blushed when I complemented her, the closeness and familiarity of our relationship. I missed it all, I missed my lover and for the first time, I realized that I missed my best friend. Because she had been, she had been the best friend that I had ever known and I had messed that all up. I had sent her packing, I had broken her heart, and I had pushed her so far out of my reach that I wasn't sure I would ever be able to get her back. But I had to try right? Isn't that what any normal human would have done in that same situation? Aren't you supposed to fight for what you love?

So I continued to stand there, maybe for an hour, my eyes fixed on her, ducking behind Sam every now and then when I thought she might glance my way. I didn't want her to see me yet so I stood there, trying to occupy my mind with the conversation that my friends were having. I pounded drink after drink, and probably about three beers into the hour, I finally found my courage. So I left them standing there, ignoring the questions that they threw my way, and made my way closer to her. She was still deep in conversation with Alice and Jasper. I put my hand on her shoulder and she turned around, I saw the pain replace the joy on her face and I felt my heart crush into a thousand tiny pieces. Had this been even a shred of what she had felt back then? I tried to talk to her but she wouldn't have anything of it. She hadn't yelled, though she would have been well within her rights to do so, hell, she could have even thrown her drink in my face and I would have understood. So I watched as she turned around and ran out of the bar.

As I stood there in the middle of the crowded bar, a few eyes looking at me though I wasn't sure if it was out of sympathy or hatred, and I finally saw the whole picture. I saw the life that we could have had flash before my very eyes like a movie screen. More than ever I realized that it was all I ever really wanted, I had just been too young and too stubborn at the time to admit to it.

I reached for my iPod before leaning my head back into the leather chair hoping beyond all hope that no one was going to come in today. I wasn't in the mood to deal with customers, I wasn't even in the mood to see my friends. I scrolled through my songs, searching for just the right one, the one that would make me feel anything so I put it on shuffle. How ironic was it that it was a song that seemed to fit everything that I was feeling right now? I closed my eyes, and listened to the voice and to the lyrics while I thought about my pain.

"_Well, hello girl, tell me, how have you been? By the way, I'll never make the same mistake again. And you know girl, it's been a long hard time, nothing like back when you were mine. And if I knew then what I know now, I'd have found the way to make things work out somehow. I'd have held you tight. I'd have treated you right. If I knew then what I know now. It's a crazy world for a boy and a girl. Harder than it is for a woman and a man. Oh, how it was easy to just push you away. Guess I never knew how I'd feel today._"

I pulled the headphones from my ears. I guess an escape wasn't going to be possible was it? I would never have her again.

She's with him now. She's with Edward Cullen and I'll never get her back because even though I've heard about his indiscretions, he's still more perfect than I'll ever be. The man saves lives for fucks sake. I only fix broken cars and break her heart.

**Edward's POV**

The hospital was quiet, but I still sought solace in it. It was one of those mornings though that I wished I worked in a hospital with more activity, at least then I could get away with working more hours. Work had always been my escape, the one place where I could go and end up feeling good about myself for just a little while. I was making a difference and it almost made me feel human, gave me a few short hours when I didn't feel guilty, where I didn't fret over my past. I just wish Carlisle understood that; he was always getting angry with me for spending so much time there. I know he had the best intentions, but the hospital was really one of the only things keeping me sane. I only say one of the things because up until three days ago, it had been the _only_ thing until one person went and changed all that.

I glanced down at my clothes; the jeans that I had thrown on and the long sleeve green shirt, it was my guise, just in case Carlisle showed up. If I stayed out of my scrubs, he couldn't say that I was working. And I knew that if he accused me of that, I would be in violation of the hospital rules and I didn't want to give him and excuse to banish me from the hospital for a week as punishment. "_You work too much Edward. You need a break._" "_Working isn't going to make your problems go away._" "_You need to take better care of yourself if you want to take good care of your patients_." His words echoed though my head. _Of course, getting banned would allow more time alone with Bella_.

Bella literally stumbled into my life with a force that I couldn't deny. I would have liked to forget it, would have liked to think that I could push the feelings of like, lust, love away. Love? Was I even capable of it? Would I be able to give her that? We had a connection, a connection deeper than any that I had ever known before. The magnetic force that drew us together was stronger than anything I ever thought imaginable. Could I give up my selfish desires to keep her? No, in her own words, it was too late for that now. I was in too deep, there would be no resurfacing from this. So long as she was happy, I would stay. I couldn't make myself do anything other than that.

Still, I couldn't help but worry about my feelings. Love was something I was not use to and it was something that carried strong implications. If I allowed myself to love, it appeared that they were taken from me, or I ended up hurting them. I'm not sure I could live with myself if I ever hurt her.

I picked up a chart that was resting on the nurse's station for a minute, my eyes scanning over what it read. _Harry Clearwater, cardiac arrest. _Apparently he was on the list for a new donor heart, he would become my patient when I was actually authorized to be there. Regardless, studying about him, learning about the case before I had the chance to met with him as his doctor would do no harm, maybe it would give me time to think of a way that would allow him to be more comfortable while he waited. I walked into his room and glanced around, he was sleeping soundly and I walked to the monitor that was hooked up to his heart to read it. He head a steady heart beat for now and I couldn't help but allow the small sigh to escape my lips, he had gotten here with enough time to assure that so long as we kept our eyes on him, we would have a chance of keeping him alive until whenever the heart came through.

"Edward!" I heard her voice before I had the chance to double back into Harry's room and I groaned. I forgot that she usually worked Saturday mornings.

"Good morning Lauren." I smiled politely.

"Are you doing anything tonight?" She smiled, her eyebrows lifted suggestively. There had been a short, brief period of time that I had spent with Lauren and looking at her now, I wasn't exactly sure why it was that I had even thought it had been a good idea. She was moderately attractive, though I had thought her to be exceptionally attractive until Bella fell into my life.

"No, I really don't think that would be a good idea Laruen."

She pouted and it had no effect on me. "But you don't have to work tomorrow! I thought we could have a little bit of fun, you know, like before."

"I think we should keep our relationship strictly professional from here on out Lauren. It's for the best." I responded my voice soft but harsh. I had to do something to make her understand, she wasn't exactly the brightest of the bunch. Still, Esme had raised me to be a gentleman and though I had been anything but to her, I supposed I owed her an amicable goodbye.

"You met her didn't you?"

"Who?"

"Bella Swan." She responded, her voice dripping with anger. "Mike just broke up with Jessica again. I don't understand what it is about her that every single guy is falling all over themselves for her."

I felt my hand ball up into a tight fist, angry that Lauren was speaking with such distain for the one perfect angel that I had ever met before. She seemed oblivious and continued to talk, her high, pitchy voice filling my ears and all I could think of was how close it sounded to nails on a chalk board. I shivered as the sound echoed in my mind.

"He thinks that now that Bella is back and so obviously not with Jacob Black anymore, that she will give him a shot. Forget about her Edward…" She reached forward and tried to grab my hand but I snapped it out of her reach and placed it behind my back. "We belong together."

"No Lauren, we don't. And I'd appreciate it if we could keep our relationship strictly professional from here on out. I'm very sorry if I have made you think otherwise, but I do believe it is for the best." I stated before turning and walking out the hall and into Charlie Swan's room, closing the door halfway so she would get the picture.

Charlie lay there on the bed sleeping, and he looked pale. My heart skipped a beat as I contemplated what could happen to him and how Bella could and or would react. I had seen her in pain too many times in the few short days that I had known her and the last thing I wanted to see was her crying again. She should never be allowed to cry; someone like her did not deserve to have fat, warm, tears streak down such a beautiful face.

I walked to his chart which was resting on the end of the bed and picked it up; I had to know what was happening, I needed to know what might happen. I scanned the nurse's notes; at one am he had spiked a fever of one hundred and three which after being administered Tylenol, had leveled out at one hundred. At three am, he woke complaining of being short of breath. And then, my heart stopped as I read the notes for five am, only three hours prior to now, at five am, he had gone into a short cardiac arrest, though they had been able to shock him in time. Why had there been no notification of the family? I was one hundred percent certain that neither Bella nor Emmett had received a phone call and that was when I glanced at the name of the nurse, Jessica Stanley.

Had what Lauren said been true? Had Mike broken up with Jessica only hours before that because he thought he could pursue _my_ angel? It seemed like something Jessica would do to spite Bella. Though what she probably wouldn't be expecting would be my wrath. She had gone against protocol because of her own damn pride. What if something had happened? Could she have lived with herself if she had denied Bella and Emmett of what could have been their final moments with their father? _Selfish cow_. I'd tell Carlisle about it later, he would deal with it, and she would be without a job. Behavior like that could not be tolerated in a hospital, it was unprofessional and inhumane.

I put the chart down and sat in one of the chairs on the opposite side of the room, my mind cluttered with thoughts. There had been many occasions when I had just sat there in Charlie's room and spoke with him, both when he was awake and asleep. I couldn't even count the amount of times that he had spoken of his daughter; his beautiful and broken daughter Bella who he longed to see more than anything else in this world but when she realized that she was meant for greater things had left without looking back. At the time I had thought her to be selfish; not even a week and a half into his stay and she hadn't so much as bothered to call him. But, now that I've met her, I couldn't help but think that there was much more to that story. I _knew_ there was more to that story and I _knew_ it had something to do with Jacob Black. What I wanted to know was if Charlie knew there was more to it. I couldn't help but worry that he might die thinking that his daughter hated him.

"Your daughter really is special Charlie; I can see why you have missed her so much." I started, knowing that I could disclose all my feelings to him and he wouldn't know, unless he was merely pretending to be asleep. I sat in silence for a minute as I listened to his breathing, steady and deep. I wouldn't have to worry about him waking anytime soon. That in and of itself gave me the courage to continue "I wish I could tell you that you are going to come out of this, more than anything I have never wanted a patient to heal more than I want you too. I can't imagine how it will affect Bella if you don't.

"She loves you, even though you might not know that. It's true that I've only known her for a few days, but I can see it in her eyes. The worry whenever your name is spoken, whenever your condition is brought up.

"I became a doctor because of everything that happened in my past. Most people don't know the story. In fact, there isn't a single sole in this town who really knows, except for Carlisle, Esme, Alice and Jasper. Still, maybe if I tell you, even if you are asleep, telling her will be easier." I stopped for a minute, my heart racing in my chest. I remembered reading studies which spoke of patients who had been in comas, even patients who were merely spoken to while they were sleeping and they retained every single word that was spoken to them. Would telling Charlie my story give me any kind of closure? I wondered if he would have done the same thing, being a man of the law and all.

"After my parents were killed... My parents were killed, by the way, though I'm sure you already knew that… " I began to tell him my story, every single detail of it, only pausing when I saw him stir. I wanted to think that he would see me, see the real me, he person behind the mask, and see that I was a good person, even though I wasn't sure of that.

"The one thing that I'm sure of Charlie, the one thing that I'm certain about, is that your daughter is the first person to make me _feel_ like a human being. The first person to make me see something more in life, to make me want a future. I've spent so much time watching my life pass by that for the first time I want to be somewhere else than this hospital, I want to be out living life and I want to live my life with her." I sighed and leaned back into the chair. I was talking to someone who was asleep. My life was just as meaningless as it had been before I came here. I still could not speak to the coherent, because right now, Charlie was anything but coherent.

Would Charlie approve of me? It was a thought that I couldn't help but entertain. Would saving his life give me leverage? That in and of itself would be enough to keep me by his side until he came through if it meant that I would have Bella by my side for the rest of my life. It was a sick thought, a sick and selfish thought. I should be there because I _want_ him to get better, not because I want him to get better for my own selfish desires.

I sat in the quiet of the room, listening to Charlie's breathing when the door opened and I turned my head to see who it was.

"What are you doing here?"

**A/N: **

**Okay this chapter took a whole different turn than I had expected. This is literally like the fourth draft of it and I'm still not entirely happy but I HAD to get something to you all before tomorrow as I'll be working on my senior thesis all day long. Tonight was the only time I had to finish it… I know I promised a Bella/Edward talk… I just didn't feel it… I've tried picturing it in my mind time and time again but it just felt forced. Plus, I wanted a Jacob perspective kind of… So I hope that you liked that… I promise you won't see them together. I feel like vomiting when I think of them together in a romantic capacity…**

**Do you like the fact that Edward talked with Charlie? I'm still not really sure how I felt about it… Something just came natural to me about it. As though he was seeking parental approval… And they do have a rather intimate relationship… What with Edward being his doctor and all and having listened to Charlie's concerns about Bella (though they haven't been spoke directly… I think I've implied how Charlie felt before Bella spoke with him). Oh, and Edward doesn't know that Bella told her dad about Jacob… And of course, Edward knows something happened with Jacob, just not exactly in what capacity…**

**Anyways, let me know what you thought… I could be persuaded to go and change this chapter if you feel it doesn't really fit…**

**As always, thank you to my wonderful reviewers!**

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x-aly-x  
EC4me  
CullenGrl255  
sprinter1  
oh-my-edward  
bloodredeclipse  
FRK921**

**Thank you all! **

**Preview: Bella and Edward are going to kiss soon… Very, very soon… And that talk… Yea, that's going to happen too…**

**I hope you all had a great weekend! I went to purchase my ticket for the midnight showing and the guy I bought the tickets from (all 7 of them because I was picking them up for my friends as well) nearly laughed when I told him how many I needed. God I can't wait. It's the only thing getting me through this weekend… I get to ogle Robert Pattinson for two whole hours while he plays my favorite literary character since Jane Austin created Mr. Darcy… Oh, instant orgasm. **


	19. Chapter 19

**Baby You Can Stop Running  
Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight**

**Chapter Nineteen**

**Bella's POV**

I pulled my truck into the deserted parking lot, my eyes looking around and scanning my surroundings; the ground was wet from the night's rain, and the dark clouds seemed to tell a story of impending rain on the way, most of the trees had lost their leaves, a sure sign that winter and colder weather was fast approaching. Winter. It had been another year that passed by in a blur and still I was no more accomplished than I had been before. Still, maybe things would be different this year, I mean, I was back in Forks, I was facing my past, the one thing that I figured I would never do.

Everything around me was quiet and I couldn't help but wonder if this was a common occurrence on weekend mornings. I tried to rack my memories from my weekends in high school while I lived here but they told me nothing, back then even I slept until nine or ten. Perhaps most liked to stay inside, secure in the warmth and comfort of their beds instead of walking about the cold town. Even the 101 was quiet, a few trucks passing every so often as they drove to the outskirts of town, most likely on their way to scout out their morning and evening fishing location on the Hoh River. I turned the key and shut the engine off before leaning against the leather of the bench seat, my head turning to the side so I could take a look at the building.

I could see his car parked around the side and I knew that there was no backing out of this now. There was no other option, and as much as I wanted to believe that there was, it just wasn't possible. But, was it too soon? Was I doing the right thing? I mentally cursed myself for driving here, I should have just gone to the hospital, at least I would have been comfortable there. I was out of my element here, my insides pulled me in so many different directions that I didn't know what to do, where to go, what to say. I just knew that Jacob had the right to know that he had a daughter somewhere out there in the world. And I knew I had to tell him before I came clean to Edward about my past, even if I didn't owe him that much, it would be the one right thing that this situation would have created.

I sucked in a deep breath before I opened the door, and stepped out into the cold. The weather was changing quickly and I placed a mental bet that there would be snow soon, and I cursed myself for not packing a heavier coat. The clouds had emitted a misty rain and it stuck to my hair and face as I began to walk towards the building, being careful to avoid any puddles that might send me falling backwards, but I stopped when I saw the familiar bikes resting outside with a For Sale sign tied onto them. He was selling our bikes.

I was surprised that the simple act would affect me the way that it had. I felt my throat close slightly, and I struggled with the next breath. My eyes began to water, and they burned against my warm cheek as they mixed with the cool while running down my cheeks. Those bikes had been important to us, part of our relationship and he was just _selling_ them. It was as though he wanted to forget that we had ever existed. I wasn't in love with Jake anymore, but the bikes were more than just our intimate relationship, they were symbolic of the close friendship that we had forged _before_ things became complicated. My hand touched the chipping red paint of the bike that use to be my own as a few tears escaped from the corners of my eyes.

I took a step back and a deep breath, trying to ignore the pain that my heart was feeling. I was confused beyond anything else. These feelings for Jake were something that I had long ago buried and standing there, my eyes looking at the bikes that we once spent weeks fixing… I realized for the first time that I didn't just lose a boyfriend, all those years ago, but I also lost my best friend, because above all else, Jake had always been my best friend. Would we ever be able to move past everything and become friends once again? I wasn't sure and my heart hurt at the possibility of that.

I gathered my emotions and opened the side door, slipping in and looking around. A light came from an office off to the side and I thought I heard the sounds of someone talking; someone who sounded distinctly like Jake. Quietly, I walked over and watched as he hung his head in the chair before slamming the phone back down on the cradle and letting out a low growl of frustration. Even with everything that had transpired between us, I felt bad for whatever it was that had him so upset.

I raised my hand and knocked lightly on the wooden door.

"Leave me alone Sam!" He shouted, his voice heavy and I could tell that he probably hadn't slept much.

I knocked again.

"I said leave me the fuck alone Sam!"

I turned the handle and stepped in before speaking, his head whipping around and his cheeks paled when he saw that it was me. "I'm sorry."

"Bella…" The strength in his voice was gone and he spoke almost in a whisper. He stood up and walked towards me, his hand touching my shoulder as though he wasn't sure that I was really there. "Bella… What are you doing here?" His eyes were glazed over, as though he had been fighting back tears and I realized that I hadn't seen him cry since his mother had passed, and even then he had tried hard to hide it from me.

"There are some things that were left unsaid… And I guess things that you should know." I replied, shifting my weight from my left foot to my right as I looked down at the ground, unable to met his eyes. I was afraid of what I might see and I was afraid of how I would react to it. It was a strange feeling standing there in front of him; on one hand I was almost happy, and I hoped that we could move past this and find a common friendship again and yet, the other was still so hurt that I wanted to cry. I realized, for the first time, that the pain of his reaction was not because he, as a boyfriend, had rejected me, but rather, as a friend, as my best friend.

"Bella I'm so glad you came back." His hand reached forward and cupped my chin, tugging my face up so I could see the look in his eyes. "I'm so glad."

"I'm not here to get into another romantic relationship with you Jake… My heart can't take that again, but there are things you need to hear and I'd appreciate it if you just let me talk until I get it all off my chest." I started and he nodded so I continued. "It won't take long. I just thought you should know that you have a daughter."

"Where?" He stuttered and I looked up to see the confused expression on his features.

"A family that lived in Southern California adopted her… I couldn't raise a child on my own, I knew that it wouldn't have been fair for her and well… You had made it pretty clear that you didn't want anything to do with her." A few traitor tears escaped from my eyes and I quickly brushed them away.

"Bella you have no idea how much I regret that." He moved closer to me now, his hand resting on my cheek but I pulled away, I didn't want him to think that things could ever go back to how they once were. It was impossible; too much had been done to even imagine that could be the case. "I hate myself for what I have done." He paused for a moment and I saw that his eyes were brimming with tears once more. "I've missed you Bella."

"You could have called Jake…"

"I wanted to. So many times Bella but I didn't think you would want to hear from me and I don't hold that against you."

"The thing is Jake, regardless of whether or not I would have wanted to talk to you, I _needed_ you there and you weren't." I looked back down towards the floor, trying to find the courage to continue and I realized that for once in my life, it wasn't that hard to find. "_You_ were my best friend Jake and you abandoned me when I needed you the most. I thought for such a long time that I was as upset as I was because you were my boyfriend but that wasn't it. I didn't lose a boyfriend, those can come and go, but I lost the best friend that I had ever known, and that was what hurt the most."

"I know what I did was wrong Bella…"

"You're right. It was wrong."

"We can start over again. We were good together Bella… We can be good together again."

"I don't love you like that Jake, not anymore…"

"How can you say that?"

"Because I _know_, I can feel that I don't love you in that capacity and I don't think I ever did." His jaw slacked and I saw the hurt flash across his eyes. "You were comfortable Jake, but I'll never be able to trust you again and you can't love someone that you can't trust."

"Let me try and make it up to you."

"Too much time has passed. You had five years to make things better but you didn't. Nothing can change that. I'm not saying we can't be friends in time, but right now, I need a clean break from you. I just thought you should know the truth, that you should know that you do have a daughter."

"Bella…" He was pleading now but I took a step back towards the door.

"Goodbye Jake." I took one last look at him before walking out and back to the truck. I could hear him calling after me but I didn't turn around, I knew that if I did that things would have been different, that I would have given him a hope that things could have gone back to how they once were and as much as I would have liked to be cruel to him, I couldn't bring myself to do that. It would have gone against my own nature.

I started the truck and pulled out of the deserted parking lot, my eyes glancing at the rearview mirror, taking in Jake's large frame as he grew smaller and smaller, the truck taking me to the one person who I longed to see after all this, the one person that made me feel whole.

**Edward's POV**

"What are you doing here?" Her quiet voice sang through the room and I turned to watch as she walked in. I felt my jaw slack a little as I took her in; it seemed that each time I let myself gaze upon her she only grew more attractive. Was that possible? My own memory was not sufficient enough to contain her beauty; it was both amazing and annoying. My eyes took in her jeans, the way they hugged her hips tightly, her green, long sleeve henley was unbuttoned just enough to see the top curves of her breasts and I felt my heart begin to race as my thoughts became cluttered.

"I-I was just checking on Charlie." I stuttered as she came over and sat down in the chair next to mine. The scent of freesia's overwhelmed my senses as she neared closer to me and I closed my eyes as I took deep breaths trying to smell as much of her as I possibly could. Memories of holding her in the night clouded my new thoughts and all I wanted to do was grab her hand and pull her towards me, to press my lips against her soft, supple, plump lips. _There goes the imagination again. This must be what it's like to have attention disorder, around her I'm completely unable to concentrate on anything. Anything but her that is._

"How is he?"

Instinctively I brought my hand to my face, pinching the bridge of my nose with my thumb and forefinger as I struggled about whether I should tell her about his minor heart attack. He had come through alright, was it worth it to worry her about something so trivial right now? Since then, he had more than stabilized and his vitals looked good once again. I felt my brow wrinkle and my lips pull into a tight line.

"He's much better." I stated, not completely lying but her eyes on me told me that she didn't believe that I was telling the whole truth. I turned to face her, reaching forward and taking one of her hands in my own. It was small and warm and like every time that our skin made contact I was filled with an electricity that I had never known before and I didn't want to let go of it, I could die a happy man if she were holding my hand. "There was an incident early this morning that I read about… I'm not sure why you weren't notified but I'm going to speak to Carlisle about it immediately. But I promise you that he's better, that he's stable."

She was biting her lower lip and I suppressed a groan as I began to think of her lips and every place that I would want them. I watched as the anxiety came across her face as she looked towards Charlie's sleeping body. He would probably sleep the majority of the day after the kind of night that he had. I was certain that his body was exhausted and sleep would be good for him, it would help his body heal. Though there were complications, I was becoming fairly certain that he would pull through; he was a strong man and he had more to look forward to than ever before with Bella back in his life.

"Edward…" Her voice was low but she kept her hand in my own though her eyes were cast to the floor. I reached over towards her and cupped her chin softly in my hand, careful as I touched the white bandage that obscured the stitches, and lifted her gaze up to my own. I could see the tears as they swam in the deep chocolate pools of her eyes and I felt as though my heart might break as I watched her fight back the tears in her eyes. Though I hated to see her cry, I wanted to tell her that it would be okay, that she could cry, that it was normal to be upset when something like this was happening, but I couldn't bring myself to utter the words, afraid that if I did, I too might find myself blinking back tears of my own. I wanted her to have a life different than my own, I _wanted_ Charlie to come through so she would never know what it would be like to have a parent ripped violently from her life.

"Bella it's okay…" I whispered, rubbing small circles on the back of her hand.

"Be honest with me… Is he going to come out of this?"

I moved my chair closer to hers, my legs between her own as I reached up and began to stroke the softness of her cheeks, occasionally wiping a few of her traitor tears as they fell from the corners of her eyes.

"I'm going to do everything I can to make sure that he will." I said, keeping her head up so that I was looking directly into her eyes, I wanted to convey the truth in my words and that was the only way I knew how to. "I promise you Bella, I will do everything in my power to make sure that he does. I wish I could give you a definitive answer but I can't. But I _promise_ that I will do whatever I can."

"It's late for him to still be sleeping." She commented, and I realized that she wanted to change the subject slightly.

"He'll probably sleep most of the day. Like I said, he had a bit of a rough night." She nodded and leaned forward, her forehead pressing against my shoulder. "Do you want to get out of here for a little while?" She nodded against me and pulled away letting me stand up. I moved away from her slightly giving her enough room before I tightened our arms to pull her to her feet as well.

"Where are we going?" She asked, squeezing my hand, setting my heart into a new series of palpitations.

"Just a place I like to go when I feel like I need to be alone, when I need to clear my head." I whispered into her ear before ushering her into my Volvo and heading North on the 101 to head into the Olympic National Forest.

**Bella's POV**

He drove to the end of a trail and parked the Volvo off to the side while I did everything I could to suppress the groan that was building at the back of my throat. _We had to hike? Hadn't he figured out that even stable floors and I were not a good combination?_ I looked over my shoulder at him and noticed that he was just sitting there, his eyes focused on something in the distance before he noticed my staring and turned to look at me, his crooked smile playing on his lips and I forgot to breathe.

"Breathe Bella." He chuckled as he shook his head. "Are you ready?"

"Where exactly are we going?" I replied, breathless as I felt his hand reach over and brush my hair behind my ear.

"I really hate it when your hair covers your face." He mused for a moment. "We have a few miles to walk, we should get started."

I heard his door slam, and looked over to see that he was now standing in front of the car, his eyes looking into the unbroken forest. I followed suit and walked up next to him, my shoulder brushing against his side and he looked down at me and smiled, his green eyes sparkling with a look that I had not seen from him before.

"What?"

"We match." He laughed and I appraised his clothing; dark jeans and a long sleeve green shirt that peaked out from his cream colored sweater. I laughed with him for a moment while trying to hide the secret twinge of regret – why did he have to look like a runway model when I couldn't, even when we wore something so completely similar?

"This way." He said, taking a few steps ahead of me before glancing over his shoulder to look where I was still standing. He was heading into the forest though he wasn't taking the trail that was marked, an action that more than confused me. What if we got lost?

"The trail?" My voice quivered as I began to move my feet to catch up with him.

"I won't let you get lost. I've been here many times, I know where we are going." He turned to look down at me, a smirk on his face and I tried hard not to gasp at his beauty. He reached down and pulled his sweater off his head taking the bottom of his shirt with him allowing me to see the hard contours of his chiseled stomach, the v that connected his legs to his hips. For the first time, his perfect musculature was no longer merely hinted at behind concealing clothes but open for my own eyes. He was _too_ perfect. Whatever his pull was to me, it would never last; there was no possible way that a creature as godlike as he could ever be meant for someone as plain as myself. My cheeks flushed as he looked down at me and noticed my staring.

"Do you want to go home?" He was quiet and quickly adverted his eyes from my own and looked back towards the trees as though he was trying to remember what direction to go.

"No."

"What's wrong?"

"I'm not a very good hiker. You'll have to be very patient."

"I'm a doctor. I can be patient – if I make a great effort." He smiled and I tried to smile back as I lifted my legs carefully over a fallen log covered with a thick, light green moss. "I'll take you home."

"No!" I said with more force than was probably necessary. I _wanted_ to be here, alone, with him. I wanted to see this place that he was speaking of; _his_ private escape that he was sharing with me. "I don't want to go home. How far is it?"

"About two miles."

"Well, if you want me to hack two miles through the jungle before sundown, you'd better start leading the way."

"I said I'd take you home." He frowned but I just shook my head and urged him forward.

It wasn't as hard as I had feared. The way was mostly flat and when the ferns had grown over past the trees, he had been kind enough to hold them back, so they would not create even more of an obstacle for me than it would have been. When his straight path took us over fallen trees or boulders, he would help me, lifting me by the elbow, and then releasing me instantly when I was clear. I couldn't help but frown when he let go and I wondered if he noticed. All I wanted to do was touch him, to feel his hands upon me like they had been as he held me during the night.

We walked in abject silence for the most part, a chasm had formed between the two of us since the morning that I couldn't understand, and I wondered if it had anything to do with Charlie. Still, I tried to ignore it, tried to savor the fact that we were alone, miles away from civilization and no one could find us. Every now and then he would ask a random question, something about my past, about college, about Renee, about growing up in both Forks and Phoenix and I would answer.

The walk took a few hours because of my slower pace though he didn't complain and I took notice as I watched the colors of the forest change as the sun seemed to appear out of nowhere. It had been such a cloudy morning that it seemed that the sun would never have poked through, yet somehow, it had. I was thankful for that, amongst everything that had been going on, with the truth of what I'd been through over the past few days, the sun was exactly what I needed and I was thankful to be experiencing it with Edward.

We reached the edge of the path and through the trees; there lay the loveliest place that I had ever seen before in my life. The meadow was small, perfectly round, and filled with a few wildflowers that had yet to be killed from the winter chill. Somewhere, nearby, I could hear the bubbling of a small stream, probably carrying the icy cold water from the top of the Olympic mountains. The sun was directly overhead, and it filled the circle with a haze of sunshine that felt warm against my cool skin. I walked slowly through it, heading towards the center, my jaw slacked with wonderment. I turned to my side, wanting to share this with him but he wasn't there, he wasn't behind me like I had thought he was and as I strained my eyes I saw him standing beneath the canopy of trees on the edge of the meadow, a small smile upon his lips as he watched me.

"It's beautiful Edward." I whispered as I took a few steps forward to him, holding my hand out, beckoning him to join me. His face broke into the most beautiful smile that I had ever seen, obviously proud of himself for his discovery, and he was by my side in a matter of moments. I couldn't advert my eyes from him, the way he seemed to glow in the sunlight as he walked towards me.

Had I thought he was beautiful before, nothing compared to Edward in the sunlight. The way his bronze hair caught the rays of sunlight, the way his pale, almost translucent skin seemed to shimmer as the light hit it. I tried hard not to gasp, but it was too difficult not too. God was showing off when he created him, no doubt, because there wasn't a single thing about him that wasn't perfect. It wasn't fair. I didn't belong here, with him, though I knew there was no way that I could pry myself from him, not knowing that he _wanted_ me there. Still though, I couldn't help but wonder why.

"It's pretty, that's for sure, though I'm not sure I would call it beautiful if compared to you." He whispered against my ear, as my body shivered involuntarily at his breath against my neck.

He pulled away and lowered himself to the ground, placing his sweater behind his head to use as a pillow. He lay perfectly still in the grass, his shirt straining against his chest and I could do nothing but stare at him. I followed suit, though instead of laying I merely sat cross legged next to him. I would have liked to lie back, as he did, and let the sun warm my face, but I stayed curled up, my chin resting on my knees. I was completely and totally unwilling to take my eyes off of him, I was almost certain that it was a dream, that he was a dream. Human perfection could not exist anywhere else, he couldn't possibly be real. The meadow that was once so spectacular to me, faded next to his splendor.

I reached forward and brushed my fingers against his hand, watching as the smile stretched across his pink lips. Since he appeared to not mind, I moved closer, stretching out my whole hand to trace the contours of his forearm with my fingertips which were trembling. Though we had shared a bed I had not touched him like this, this was almost intimate, as though I were trying to memorize every line of his body for fear that I might never see him again.

"Do you mind?" I whispered as his eyes closed.

"No." He sighed, the faint smile still there on his lips. "You can't imagine how that feels."

With a new found confidence I became more forward, trailing my hand over the perfect muscles of his arm, touching the crease of his elbow before turning his hand over and lightly running my fingers on the lines that creased the palm of his hand.

"Tell me what you're thinking." He whispered one eye open and looking at me. "I've always been good at reading people but I can't read you at all. It's so strange for me."

"You should know that's how I feel when I look at you."

"It's a hard life." He smirked. "But you didn't tell me."

"I _was_ thinking that I wish I knew what you were thinking…" I hesitated and watched as he turned onto his side, his elbow propping him up so we were almost at eye level, his eyes burning into me. "You just seem…"

"I seem?"

"I don't know. You're so infuriating sometimes." I groaned. "Like back at the car. Sometimes you are so sweet and other times, you look at me as though you wish I didn't care for you."

"That's because I wish you didn't care for me." He replied, his eyes casting down towards the ground. "It would be easier that way."

"What would be easier Edward? What are you so afraid to tell me about?"

"I'm not good for you Bella."

"Why do you say that?" I groaned.

"Can you do something for me before I answer that?"

"I'm not sure. What do you want?" His eyes flickered back up to me, taking me by surprise. There was an intensity behind them that I could not remember seeing before.

"I just… I want to try something." He was quiet and I wasn't sure I heard him properly, but I felt him remove his hand from mine as he placed it on the back of my head, his fingers tangled in the locks of my long hair as his face inched closer to my own. My heart was beating rapidly in my chest with anticipation as I watched him move onto his knees, his other now free hand moving to my back, pulling me closer towards him. My instincts gave him a response as my arms wrapped around his neck, and he crushed his lips onto my own…

**A/N:**

**Hmm… Sorry for ending it there but I thought I'd give it some dramatic flair! ANYWAYS… Was this what you were expecting? Did you like it? I'm actually quite pleased with the chapter as a whole, though this one, like the previous one, took about four drafts before I finally was happy with it. **

**So… You've FINALLY gotten your kiss… And if you couldn't tell… Edward is going to come clean first… I think… His story is a little more prominent than Bella's especially as it's going to be part of the climax… At least, his past is going to come back and kick him in the butt… But if you understood the plot line that I'm following I'm sure you already know that.**

**As always, thank you to my lovely readers! All of you who continue to add this story to your alerts/favorites are amazing! And an extra special thanks to all you who stroke my ego by leaving me some of the most fantastic reviews that I think I have ever gotten! **

**Thank you to:  
bloodredeclipse  
dwebb88: Your words have warmed my heart. Thank you so much! I appreciate what you have to say. It makes me so happy to hear that you think it's one of the best!  
ysosrsbsns: I'm so honored that you took the time to review, especially as you say you don't usually. That means the world to me to know that you think so highly of my story!  
RikkuYuki  
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Luvntwilight  
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**CullenGrl255  
Tulips at Twilight  
Islingtonangel: I can't believe you lived there last year! I was in the crappy East End but it was because I was going to Queen Mary and was living on campus. I'm actually thinking about moving back next year and I'm looking at flats with my friend in Islington/Angel… We use to go to this amazing little bar on high street called Metro… But apparently it's closed down and is now some ritzy French place. That kind of made me cry…  
greenbuttonsx  
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-xAxsxHxlxExyx-  
EC4me  
Bubblybuddy  
wingedvamp1107  
penguinopus  
x-aly-x  
TwiWriter15: I'm sorry you have to wait! I would go crazy! Each time I see the preview I become a tween fan girl and let out a high pitched scream… Must be able to contain myself tomorrow though. Haha.  
Sparkle  
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FRK921**

**Seriously guys, you all are amazing! Thank you!**

**I'd also like to thank the Community group: As Human as You and Me for adding my story to their archive. **

**So this is my update before the movie… I hope you all have a fantastic time watching it… Like I said just a few moments ago, I have totally reverted to the tween fan girl each and every time I see the damn preview… I'm so excited. I'm hoping it's great! Though I'm also hoping to not have to deal with lots of rabid fan girls because I want to actually be able to watch the movie and not only hear screaming! *fingers crossed***

**Anyways, I hope that you liked this chapter! I'm curious to see if I can break my record of 25 reviews for one chapter though there isn't any pressure at all. I'm just curious!**

**I'm working now on top of school… I've finally found a job and the store actually opens this weekend and I've got a Constitutional Law paper due on Monday so I'm not sure when the next update will be, though if I get reviews I'll definitely try to get something out much quicker!**

**Thank you all!**


	20. Chapter 20

**Baby You Can Stop Running  
Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight**

**Chapter Twenty**

**Edwards POV**

"I just want… I want to try something." My voice was barely louder than a whisper as I looked down at her, watching the blush turn her pale, milky skin into a beautiful shade of red. I fought back a quick urge to reach forward it, to feel the heat as it pooled in her cheeks but I refrained for a moment. I locked my eyes on her own and I felt as though my body had gone weak and it was a feeling that I was completely unsure of, one that I never thought a man could ever feel for a woman. It seems sexist, maybe even stereotypical, but I always just assumed that it was only women who went weak when looking deep into the eyes of the one that they were falling for. But Bella… Bella defied any sense of normalcy that I had ever believed in; she made me realize how unsure of myself I was, and made me question each and every decision that had led me to this point. This one, girl, the most beautiful girl that I had ever known, the most beautiful girl in the world, stirred up feelings that I never even knew were possible, and I savored each and every one of them, afraid that one day she would wise up and leave me.

She looked confused, as though she was unsure as to what I had planned, as though she couldn't fathom why I would want to spend time with her. Still, looking at her, watching as the sunlight peeked through the clouds and enhanced her natural beauty, as the red in her hair shone brightly, I was captivated. She might have been unaware as to why I wanted to be with her, but she was so completely unsure of herself that it was absurd because in that moment, _I _was mystified that someone like her could even think, could even _want_ to be in such a close proximity to myself as she was. What had I done to even deserve such a thing? How could an angel want to be with a monster? Not that she was aware of that part of me… Not yet at least.

I finally gave into my desires and reached my hand out, tangling it in the locks of her long, dark hair and I reveled in its silkiness. It felt like the softest of cashmere's as I continued to move my fingers around it and somehow I was rewarded by the tiniest of moans as my face began to move closer to hers. I kept my eyes open, wanting to gauge her reaction, wanting to know that she wanted this just as much as I did, the moan could have been nothing more than a reaction, a passing before she realized the actuality of what was really happening. Still, her eyes were pressed shut and her lips were parted just enough to make me realize that she wanted this just as much as I did. I moved a little closer and I could smell the sweetness of her breath, and as I moved onto my knees, I could feel the way my heart was racing as it pounded violently against my chest. In a moment so quick, I had moved my free hand to her back and pulled her into my body, crushing her small, petite frame against my hard one and I almost came undone at the feel of her softness, of her warmness. I found myself letting out a low, guttural growl as her arms wrapped around my neck, her fingers weaving themselves in my unruly hair and I crashed my lips against hers in a heated passion.

Over the past few days I had allowed myself to fantasize about kissing Bella, had allowed myself to think of what it might have been like, though nothing could have compared to the reality. I remember being told so many times that fantasy was always better than reality, wasn't that the reason people immersed themselves into novels and film, because the fictional characters were always the epitome of what they so desired? The thing is, with Bella, I couldn't help but laugh because when it came to her, the reality was _so_ much better than the fantasy. The moment my lips pressed against her own, it felt as though every single nerve ending was back firing sending thousands of tiny electric shocks, not only on my lips, but throughout my entire body. Her lips, the lips that I had dreamed about were soft, so much softer than I had ever allowed myself to imagine and they moved against my own as though they were meant to touch, as though they had been made for this. Her mouth willingly opened, much to my own surprise, as I ran my tongue along them, allowing only a few moments to enjoy how they felt against the muscle, still, tasting her… She tasted sweet, though I would never be able to quite place the actual taste, I knew that nothing in this world could taste nearly as good as she did. I could give up food if it meant kissing her. That was when I realized that my only coherent thought during this moment was that she was more potent to me than the strongest drug in the world eve r could be. Could someone die of an addiction to a person? I feared that could be the case with my growing obsession with this girl. Bella was my addiction, an addiction so powerful that I knew one day, it would be the end of me. Still, I didn't care, just as Romeo had loved Juliet, just as much as their addiction to each other had been their downfall and though I had chastised him for his obsession, and as harshly criticized their relationship, I would never be able to surface ever again. I now knew what it meant to love someone beyond comprehension. Bella _was_ an addiction, and one that I was so completely unwilling to ever break, regardless of what it might do to me in the end.

With as much effort as I could muster I pulled away, knowing that if one of us didn't stop then we would probably be the first couple to ever die from kissing. I could feel the heaviness of her breath, how badly she too needed to step back and breath, and for the first time in my life I realized that I had to be strong. I had to push my selfish needs away, even if only for a moment in order to protect her. I also knew, it wouldn't be that hard. Nothing in the world mattered as much as she did.

She groaned when I pulled away, moving closer to me for a moment before opening her eyes and looking up at me through her lashes. I looked away from her, allowing my eyes to graze her body, taking in the heaving of her chest as she appeared to be more winded than I had at first believed, and I could, for the first time, feel the tightness of my jeans and I moved back, sitting down on the ground trying desperately to conceal my desire for her, not wanting her to think that I had even thought she would do something about it. _Oh how I wished she would though…_ Changing positions however was not as helpful as I had hoped it would be because she continued to look at me, her eyes filled with a lust that I had never seen before and she bit her lower lip, swollen from my furious attack, and the uncomfortable strain was once again prominent.

"That was…" I finally found myself saying and the words were soft, not wanting to scare her off. My eyes were fixed intently on her face, and I watched as the blood once again pooled in her cheeks creating the blush that I was so fond of. Though, it must have embarrassed her because as soon as she felt it, she turned her head away, looking down at the grass as her long hair shielded her face from my view causing myself to groan with dissatisfaction.

"Bella, please don't turn away from me. You have no idea how beautiful your blush is." I spoke with more authority, reaching forward and cupping her chin in my hand, forcing her to look at me and I reveled in the brightness of her cheeks, feeling the heat through my fingertips. I leaned down and began to place soft butterfly kisses against her cheeks and neck, both watching and feeling as the heat steadied and her cheeks went back to their milky white color. "God Bella… You'll be the death of me…"

"What?" She turned to look at me, her eyes shining with confusion.

"I brought you here with certain intentions…" My voice trailed as I kept her eyes on my own. I was suddenly unsure as to how I should progress. Telling her was risky, and I was worried about what she would think because I knew it would kill me if she left, if she saw me as the monster that I saw myself as. But something deep down compelled me to continue, some unnatural force seemed to reassure me that everything would be okay, that I would even feel better if I spoke the words aloud that I had been keeping hidden for so long. So instead of holding back, I allowed the words to flow from my lips. "There are things that I need to tell you…"

"You can trust me Edward…" Was her response and it was all I needed, the one push from her that would allow me to spill my history. To tell her how I became the man that I was today. How, until her, I had been merely a ghost walking alongside the living.

"When I was ten my parents were killed. I didn't know what had really happened at the time, the only thing I can clearly remember from that night was how cold it was. Chicago isn't usually that cold during June, but I was bundled under my blankets as I slept. Maybe it was ominous; death sucks the warmth out of everything… That night was meant to be cold, the perfect foreshadowing of the life that lay ahead of me." Her eyes were fixed on my own and she reached forward and took my hand into hers. "My nanny was taking care of me that night… My mom was a senator and my father was a cardio thoracic surgeon, one of the best in his fields…

"They were leaving a charity event at the children's hospital… It was a few days before my eleventh birthday and we were going on a vacation which was something that we rarely had time to do… Well that's really insignificant though so anyways… James Anderson… I guess he was a part of some radical political group, a confederate group of sorts… I'm not really too sure who the group was, but they apparently didn't like my mother… Or more clearly, they didn't like her in her position of power.

"That night he followed them after they left. I wish I could say that it affected me in the way Bruce Wayne's parents murder affected him. I wish I could say that I had been inspired to change the community, that I had taken that experience to fight the evil… But I didn't. My nanny had told me that my parents died in a car crash. How do you tell a ten year old that their parents were murdered? It wasn't until I was around fifteen that I really learned what had happened. When the court determined who it was, his lawyer got him out by manner of insanity and my rage grew…" I closed my eyes as certain images flashed through my mind and I tried hard to hide the tears that were threatening to fall. She was still quiet but her fingers were rubbing small circles on the hand that she still held and it gave me the courage to continue.

"I wasn't lying when I told you in the car that I have a problem with my temper… But I never had that problem until I had learned the truth about my parents. I don't fault my nanny… I don't even fault Carlisle and Esme, what were they suppose to tell me? They encouraged me to find the answers that I needed however, once I did learn the truth I went to the asylum that James was being treated in.

"Even Carlisle and Esme are not aware of this… It was too painful to talk about…" I said softly as she nodded. I wasn't sure why I was telling her but I felt that it was the right thing to do… That she would understand. "When I went there to talk to him he was so cruel. He kept saying that it was what God had told him to do. He said that he was proud of himself…" A tear escaped my eye and I wiped it away quickly. "He went on to say how they begged for their lives. How they groveled at his feet and how powerful it made him feel and that he would do it again if he had the chance and the only reason that he didn't kill their driver was because he didn't have time, but he would have if he had.

"Their driver was thrown into a hospital after it happened… He was too traumatized to speak about it, though when I went to him, he recognized me immediately, said that I looked like my father… I was the only person that he ever talked to. He said that my father had told James to spare my mom and take him… That they had a son and one of them had to take care of me. James didn't care… He said it was quick, but that the sound of the terrible laughter still haunted him at night. But regardless, my parents had died as heroes, they had died with dignity.

"When the courts wanted to release James I fought the system hard and pressed for the biggest punishment… Capital punishment. I thought it was the easiest way to deal with it. That if he was dead that it would rectify the situation, that it would make me feel better and I could go back to living the life that wanted. To me, that man took away everything that I could have ever imagined; he took my parents, he took my childhood, he took my life.

"It didn't take much convincing really… The appellate court had sided with me and he was murdered in June of 2004… I was there. This new monster deep within me wanted to be there, wanted to watch him die. And, for the briefest of moments I had this sick sense of excitement as I watched his eyes close, and I hoped that I was the last person that he saw in this lifetime. I wanted him to know that I had won." I looked away from her, suddenly sick with myself. This confession was harder than I had thought it would be. But still, she had not run away.

"It didn't make me feel any better… I regret every decision that I ever made when it came to James. I should have let him go. I shouldn't have pursued him like I had. Maybe he really was insane… Maybe he had been brainwashed… Maybe I did take away the life of someone who didn't know any better. Who am I to play God? Who am I to say that he deserved to die?"

We were silent for a long while. I wasn't sure what else was left to say and it seemed that she was still

"I don't deserve you Bella… People like me… People who allow the lives of others to be taken, regardless of if they deserve it or not… I don't deserve to be happy."

"Don't ever say that Edward." Her voice shocked me. I honestly had not considered what I would do if her reaction was positive. "Don't ever say you don't have a right to be happy. You did what you thought you had to do, how could anyone fault you for that? You are not a bad person Edward. You are so far from it. You spend your life taking care of people who are in need of it. You save lives."

"How can you say that Bella? Look what I've done! I don't save lives, I take them! I'm no better than him! I'm a monster."

She was shaking her head violently as she moved closer to me. "One life was taken Edward… His… And maybe he did deserve it. The jury seemed to think he did. You can't blame yourself for something that you didn't decide on. A jury made the decision."

"A decision that never would have happened if I hadn't pushed for it."

"What's to say that when he was back on the streets he wouldn't do it again? Maybe you saved more people by pushing for it."

"No… You can't believe that."

"Why is it so hard to believe that Edward?"

"Because… Maybe he was reformed. Maybe he was healthy. Maybe he was sorry for what he had done. And if he was I had no right to take away that life from him."

"You're not a bad person Edward." She said again and I wished that I could believe it.

"I'm a shell of a man Bella… I'm barely whole when I'm around you. You are the only thing that has made me feel alive since it happened but I can't rely on you to fix me. _You_ have every single right in the world to be with someone who doesn't have the terrible past that I have. For all I know some day, somewhere along the road one of his relatives will come after me to punish me… What will stop them from doing to you what they did to my parents? I couldn't live with myself if I was the cause of your own death. Because of me, you could die."

She laughed a low, controlled laugh and I eyed her curiously. "That's a bit of a stretch… Five years have passed and no one has been looking for you, they would have found you already, it's not like it would be all that hard. But you fail to take into account me… You claim that I'm this perfect person but I'm not… I'm so far from it. How do you know I'm even worthy of being around you?" She said and her words stunned me. "How do you know that my past isn't just as terrible as your own? How could you want to be with me when you have absolutely no idea what I've done?"

"Because I _know_ you Bella." I replied. "I can see you. There is this incredible innocence about you, this amazing comfort… You are this breath of fresh air that I never knew existed. Nothing you could have ever done could be that bad. And the last thing you should ever be around is someone like me. I'm unworthy of love, I'm unworthy of happiness and I'm more than unworthy of you. I leave a wake of death on my trail and if I ever hurt you… I could never live with myself and I know that's exactly what is going to happen." I was loud… Shouting now, my arms flying around with large grand gestures as I tried to get her to understand just how much she shouldn't be around me. She was still unmoving, though her eyes were wide with something. Shock? Fear? It must be fear. It _should_ be fear.

And then it appeared that tears were brimming at her eyes and I recoiled. I had gone too far. This was not the reaction that I had wanted. I never wanted to make her cry; I never wanted to make her afraid of me. I just thought she should be afraid of me, so in trying to make my point I had pushed that to happen. _Shit…_

"Don't be afraid…" I murmured though I could feel my voice trembling. I needed her… "I promise… I swear not to hut you… My temper just gets the better of me… Please don't be afraid." I paused for a moment as my eyes looked into her own, lowering my face to met her own. "Please forgive me…"

"You don't know me as well as you think you do Edward… You aren't the only one with a past… With secrets that this small town doesn't know… I almost had an abortion…" She said quickly before clasping her hands over her mouth with surprise and I could feel my eyes go wide with shock.

**Bella's POV**

Well… There it is. My truth and the look in his eyes… I turned away for a moment, wondering if I might be able to change the subject. No… Here I was, he had just told me his entire past, a past that he was obviously ashamed of though I had no idea why… If anyone hunted down Charlie or Renee I would have reacted in the same way. I was sure of that.

"I'm sorry Bella…" He said after a moment. "I guess that just took me by surprise."

"I told you that you don't know me as well as you thought you did."

"I don't care about your past Bella."

"Then why do you think I care about yours?" I retorted. How was this fair? How could he tell me that he wasn't worthy of me when he had no idea what I had gone through. "You think I'm innocent? You think that I'm whole? I know what it's like to look in the mirror and hate yourself. I know what it's like to feel like you're not good enough." I looked at his eyes and as I began to speak they dimmed, a mask that he had probably perfected over the past five years to hide his feelings from the world. "I've spent the past four years thinking that I'm not good enough."

"You are more than enough Bella… You are so much more than enough."

"He didn't think that." I replied, casting my gaze back down to the floor.

"He was foolish. An idiot who didn't know what he had."

"Maybe I'm just not meant to be loved."

"That's the thing Bella. You _are_ meant to be loved. You deserved to be loved by someone who can appreciate everything that you are."

"My past is part of who I am."

"Then tell me what your past is… What was so horrible? Nothing will change my feelings, but it also doesn't change the fact that I shouldn't be near you. That I don't deserve you."

I felt his hand on my chin as he forced me to look up at him. I hated that he could do this… That he could tell me that he wanted me but in the same sentence say that he shouldn't be with me at the same time. I hated his hypocrisy. I hated that he was putting it on me, that he was making me make this decision. Still… It didn't matter. If he still wanted me after I divulged my past, I would never leave. Nothing he had told me could have made me go running because I would have done the exact same thing. It killed me inside that he was beating himself up over it so much. He didn't have to be in that kind of pain.

I sighed as he placed his palms on both sides of my face. "When I first moved here I didn't know anyone. Well, anyone but Jacob, we had played together when I use to come visit Charlie during the summer… So I guess he was a natural friend to make. But those feelings kind of evolved and before my senior year we started a relationship… About a month before I left for California I learned that I was pregnant and when I told him he just said he would help me take care of it…" Tears were falling down my cheeks but his hands on the sides of my face kept them from running too far as he starred at me intently. "He wanted me to get an abortion…"

"But you said you didn't." His smooth voice broke my speech and I shook my head.

"Emmett was the only one who knew the truth until I told Charlie yesterday… And now you… When I got to San Francisco I went to the clinic and I sat there and looked around at everyone around me and I realized that I couldn't do it."

"So what happened?"

"You ask a lot of questions you know that?"

"I'm sorry… I'll be quiet." He smiled softly, his left lip curling up into his famous crooked smile, dazzling me for a moment and leaving me incoherent before my mind kicked back in.

"Even though I knew I couldn't have the abortion, I knew that I was too young to take care of a child. And Jake had been more than clear in his opinion… I didn't really have much of a choice so a week later I found an adoption agency and filed all the necessary papers…" I closed my eyes for a moment. "Emmett tried hard to be there for the birth but I wouldn't let him. I knew that if he met her then he would have tried to talk me out of it… It was hard enough when I held her after it all…

"You know how they tell you that no one loves you like your parents?" He nodded. "I didn't think I would feel anything for her. For all those nine months I resented her… I hated her. I hated what she had done to my relationship. I thought that Jake and I were in love… But when I held her it all melted away… Giving her up was the hardest thing I ever had to do… There wasn't a day that went by that I didn't think of her, that I didn't wonder what she looked like or how she was doing… There wasn't a day that I didn't have a pain deep inside of me… Until I met you."

"I should have left…" He sighed. "I should go now. But I don't know if I can."

"I don't want you to leave." I said pathetically… It was the truth, I needed him just as much, if not more, than he needed me.

"Which is exactly why I should go. But don't worry. I'm essentially a selfish creature. I crave your company too much to do what I should."

"I'm glad."

"Don't be."

"Nothing is going to change my feelings… You've essentially brought me back from the dead Edward. I never thought that I would ever feel this way ever again… And here it is… Here I am, acting completely unlike myself, throwing myself at you… "

"You need to know that it's not that I don't want to be with you Bella… I'm just afraid that something will happen to you if you let me love you… If I let you love me."

"Maybe it's too late for that."

"It's never too late Bella."

"If you leave I'll probably die…"

"Don't you ever say that."

"Say what? The truth?" I spat. I was hitting below the belt and it was on purpose. "I was very close to killing myself in California… And then you…" I shook my head in frustration. There was no point in continuing. He knew what I was saying.

"Isabella." He pronounced my full name and I stared at him wide eyed. "Bella, I couldn't live with myself if I ever hurt you… You don't know how it's tortured me, to be around you and to know that I could be putting you in danger." He looked down, hiding his shame. "The thought of you, still, white, cold… to never see you blush scarlet again, to never see that flash of fire in your eyes… it would be unendurable." He looked back up and I could see the agony that his eyes were confessing. This wasn't an easy feat for him… And I could tell that he truly believed that by being with me he was putting me in some kind of danger… Still I wasn't so sure. And even if that was the case, I didn't care. Dying with him… Dying knowing that he loved me would be more than enough for me. It would be the best way to go.

"You are the most important thing to me now. The most important thing to me ever." His eyes met mine as he continued and I watched as they softened and I could see exactly what it was he was trying to convey and I knew he was telling the truth, even though I had absolutely no idea why it was me. Why was it me, out of every other girl in the world, had he chosen to fall in love with? It didn't matter. I would take him. I would have him for as long as he loved me and I would love him until I died. Still, my head was dizzy with the sudden change of topic. He had gone from telling me that his presence was going to kill me, to declaring his love for me.

"You already know how I feel Edward… I'd much rather die than stay away from you." I replied. "I'd say I am an idiot but I don't think you are as harmful as you say you are."

He shook his head as he laughed. "You are an idiot." And with that I found that I was laughing too.

"And so the lion fell in love with the lamb." He whispered, his fingers reaching forward, pushing a few strands of hair from my face as a smile played on my lips, thrilled to the word that he had used.

"What a stupid lamb."

"What a sick, masochistic lion." He replied, his eyes now down, casting a gaze to the ground. I wondered where his thoughts had taken him.

We sat there in silence, the weight of our confessions too strong to bother with any other words and it wasn't until he looked up towards the sky to see the sun as it began to set that he finally spoke up once again, startling me in the process. "We should head back. It's getting late and it will get cold soon." I nodded and watched as he gracefully stood up, reaching down to help me as well.

"Come on, jump on my back, we will get there faster."

"I'm a bit heavier than your average backpack." I stated and watched as he smiled wide.

"Hah!" He laughed, his jubilance seemed contagious because I was smiling as well. This was the kind of Edward I could get use to being around. This, I knew, was the _real_ Edward. He just needed to learn that for himself. Before I could protest again, he moved down, placing my hands on his shoulders and grabbing the backs of my knees, pulling me up on his back before beginning the trek back to his car, both of us knowing that things were going to change.

**A/N:**

**I first want to apologize for how long this has taken me to get out. It has literally been driving me crazy to not write but I've been so completely swamped with life that I haven't had the chance and each time I would sit down, the words were such crap and I knew you deserved better than that! So, my explanation: My semester is over in a week and a half… Basically meaning that I have a Senior thesis that is barely started, I've had at least two papers due every week since before Thanksgiving, and my job seemed to think it was a good idea to schedule me for 35 hours even though I said explicitly on my availability as well as when I was hired that I could work no more than 20-25 a week… So I've been running on about an average of 3-4 hours of sleep a night… And when I went home for Thanksgiving I was busy with family things and dealing with a personal issue with a guy who has been in my life… Granted I'm beginning to think I need to let go of him because I can't keep dealing with this… **

**So… As for the chapter. I really hope that you liked it. I've worked hard on it but I'm still unsure as to how it flows/fits… It's taken about four drafts and this is the first one that I'm relatively pleased with… I'm just still not sure… Still… I hope you liked it!**

**As always, thank you to all my reviewers! You rock!**

**Lovinit999  
puppydoggielover  
Paige  
bellaandedwardxcullen4ever  
dazzlefy-me1309  
bubblybubbly  
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dwebb88****bluebella.x  
SWChica2005: I was super insistent that my mother read the books when she came to visit me… I think she only gave in because I couldn't stop talking about them though she ate her words when she TOO couldn't put them down. When I went home for Thanksgiving I took her to the movie…  
Sparkle  
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NanMcD: Your comment touched me… Thank you so much for the compliment. I very much appreciate it! I hope you like this chapter as much as the others!  
wingedvamp1107  
IslingtonAngel: Yea I wouldn't be a first year or anything… I'd be getting my masters… It's really between living in Islington, Chelsea, Covet Garden/Holburn/Bloomsbury and possibly Notting Hill/Paddington… I'm just finding I miss being there a lot and want to go back.  
MyriadProBold  
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EdsMine**


	21. Chapter 21

**Baby You Can Stop Running  
Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight…**

**Chapter Twenty One**

**Emmet's POV**

I walked into the hospital that afternoon after finding what little strength I had within myself to leave Rosalie snuggled beneath the covers of my blankets. That woman was everything that I never thought I needed, everything I couldn't now live without. The past week without her had been unbearable, and that was putting it mildly. I've never exactly been one to become emotionally attached (if I were a psychologist, I probably would have placed a high bet that it was a learned trait after watching my parents marriage crumble before me like a stale cracker) but Rosalie lit a fire in my heart that no one else had ever come close to before. And there had been so many before her…

From high school until about my junior year at the University of Washington I would have been considered promiscuous, a male slut of sorts (Bella kindly referred to them as my playboy days). It was a life filled with never sleeping with the same woman more than three times before casting her away for the next flavor of the week. I claimed it was because I grew bored, but Bella knew me better than that.

"_Emmett, really it's not fair what you're doing to those poor girls." She sighed into the phone. _

"_Bells, they know what their getting into. I'm the George Clooney of Seattle!" I grinned and puffed my chest out. It was a title that The Daily had given me when the staff realized that I had singled handedly bedded half of their female writers. _

"_And do you think that the eternal bachelor is a happy man?" _

"_Of course he is! I mean, the man has slept with some of the hottest women around! If I were him, I would without a doubt die a happy, happy man." _

"_You say that now… Just wait Emmett… One day you'll find a girl who will tame you. One who will get you to forget about this irrational fear of commitment because mom and dad didn't work out."_

"_Whatever you say sis." I smiled before she launched into her news about her evolving relationship with Jacob Black. _

Jacob Black… The name in and of itself was enough to bring a scowl to my face. Though our parents had split us up with the divorce, it hadn't exactly been bad for our relationship; in fact, it had just the opposite effect. I had become extremely protective over my little sister, so much so that when she began to date Jacob the summer before her senior year of high school, I sat down with him and gave him a nice little chat, violently depicting each and everything I would do to him if he so much as tried to hurt her.

I still regretted that I never actually went through with those plans when I learned of what he had done to her. If there are any regrets in my life, it was not following through with the early threats of bodily harm to his body should he ever try and mess with her. Still, I couldn't deny that the punch I landed to his nose hadn't felt good at the time. Though more punches would have been ever better. Then again, maybe it really wouldn't have mattered, I'd still hate him just as much as I do now for changing Bella… For taking away her lively, optimistic, loving personality and leaving a broken heap of a girl on the floor of her bedroom, broken hearted over the loss of her boyfriend, sad over the loss of her best friend, and afraid that love would never find her again. She didn't deserve that. She was worth so much more than that and I couldn't help but worry that she would never come back to us in the way that she once was, that that person was gone forever.

Seeing Bella at SeaTac that day had been a changing point for me in my life. At least, a real, life changing event. I had known about what Jacob had done to before she had come back. I was the only one who really knew the truth, besides him of course and though I had scaled back on the women that I had pursued on campus because I was terrified that I would do something like that to them, it wasn't until I saw the tears streak down her face, her body limp in the airport as I held her in my arms, that I realized just how dire the situation had truly been. I hated to admit it, but I had figured that she would have healed a little more being in California, it seemed though, that in coming back, she was worse off than ever before.

_I watched as she made her way over towards the luggage carousel and I couldn't help but notice how emaciated she had become. After having given birth it appeared that she had wasted away and I knew that was probably the case. During the whole ordeal I knew that she voiced her strength but if I knew Bella as well as I thought I did, I was fairly certain that it was all an act. I smiled at her and I watched as she approachhed and saw the tears that were welling up in her eyes, it was only moments later that she was sobbing._

"_Shhh. Bella…" I whispered, feeling her tears as they soaked through my shirt. I knew there was no way I could take her to Forks, even the prospect of getting off the plane had been more than she could bear. Still, I couldn't let her get on a plane in the state that she was in either. _

"_I can't go there Emmett…" She sobbed as she clutched my shirt. I was nearly about to cry as well as I watched her, as I realized that there was nothing that I could do to help her. She was broken beyond repair. That piece of shit Jacob Black, who I had on good authority, was out living his life, dating some of the girls on the reservation, while my precious little sister was torn up inside. Somehow, that in and of itself didn't seem fair to me._

"_It's okay Bella… Let's go to one of the hotels, you can clean up, have some food, get a good night's sleep and I'll have you on a plane tomorrow back to California."_

Rosalie came into my life shortly after that incident at the airport and she had been a challenge that was for sure. When I met her I knew that I wanted her, but to what extent I wasn't sure. She was a year younger than me and studying at Seattle University. I had met her at a bar one night, and she had stood out among the crowed. Still, I wasn't the only one to take notice, though I was the only one that she spoke to that night… Well, with some sign of interest. Still, in that moment I had become hooked to her and pursued her stronger than anyone else I ever had. I had feared that my 'George Clooney' nickname had somehow spread to the Seattle University campus because for three months she had shown little interest, her behavior ranging from cold to warm and it confused me, and excited me. Unlike the girls before, she had been a challenge and one worth undertaking and finally after four months of chasing after her, she allowed me into her life and I realized that there was no way I was ever letting her out of mine.

Reading people had never been an outstanding trait of mine, in fact, unless it came to choosing what girl it was that I was going to be taking home, I was pretty useless at it. And even that skill had gone by the way side after I declared that no other woman but Rosalie would ever sleep in my bed, so you can imagine my surprise when I stood witness to Edwards glances towards Bella. I knew that look in his eye, that slight glimmer, the smile that appears when their name is said or whenever they walk into the room, I saw the lust that washed over his face when he held her in his arms… And although I knew he was a good guy, with Bella's past I couldn't help but be a little apprehensive about this blossoming relationship.

True, she seemed to like him and true, he wasn't Jacob. But still, he had been living in Forks for two years now and I knew quite well what his reputation was like. He was something like an older version of my former self, and though the two years age difference wasn't that great of a deal… I still wasn't sure I was comfortable having him pursue my innocent younger sister. In a town as small as Forks, whenever someone "hooks up" so to speak, it becomes the talk of the town… Edward had "hooked up" with the majority of the single women under thirty. I suppose I'd just have to have that talk with him when the time came… Rosalie however urged me to let things flow as they may, that it would work of if it was meant to and that Edward was essentially a good human being and she couldn't see him hurting Bella the way Jacob had. Still, though I loved her dearly, her opinion didn't much matter to me when it came to Bella.

"_He's sweet Em…" She smiled as I wrapped my arms around her._

"_I'm still not happy with him sleeping in her room."_

"_Did he really have much of a choice? That girl is in love with him." I visibly scowled at her remark and she smacked my chest playfully. _

"_I still don't like it."_

"_After everything she's been through, doesn't she have a right to be happy? What if he makes her happy Em? Isn't that what really matters?" _

"_Since when did you become a romantic?"_

"_I'm not…" She grinned. It was true, though Rosalie was a girl in so many ways, when it came to others, she was so completely on my level. Take her idea of romance: going out to dinner. And unlike the girls I use to wine and dine before her, it didn't matter if it was a five star, Michelin rated chef, though she did appreciate it. But, for the most part, she was content just ordering a pizza and cuddling up on the couch. Not that her idea of romance exactly stopped me from wining and dining her, I would take her to Seattle a few times a month to do such a thing for her … It was just nice to not feel the pressure to do it. "It's just… He's obviously very protective of her and it's sweet, and she wants to be around him. There was no physical way you could have pried her from his arms tonight." _

"_He's five years older than her!" _

"_She's a grown woman…"_

"_But she doesn't know what she's getting herself into. The man has slept with half the town!"_

"_Hypocritical much?"My eyes grew wide with that comment. I had never told her about my past indiscretions so I assumed that she had no knowledge of my former self. "George Clooney would hang his head in shame if he knew his protégé no longer played the field." She grinned at me, her full lips pulled taught into the most brilliant smile I had ever seen. "You really thought I didn't know?"_

"_I-I guess I just…"_

"_Emmett, I knew exactly who you were that night in the bar."_

"_So you made me wait four months why?"_

"_I never wanted to be just one of those girls. I knew I had to set myself apart."_

"_You never cease to amaze me woman."_

"_Don't call me that." She pouted._

"_Baby…" I smiled, rolling over on top of her._

"_No. You aren't getting out of it that easily." She retorted, pushing me over. "If you changed, what's to say that he can't? Do you see the look in his eyes when he looks at her?" I scowled again and she giggled. "I know how much you love your sister, but what if he is a driving force in getting her to come back? I know how much you've missed her, how much Charlie has missed her… Maybe this is exactly what she needs to make her come back. I wouldn't close yourself off to the idea of having him in her life just yet… I have a good feeling about that one."_

"_Are you done yet?"_

"_Will you agree that I might be right?"_

"_No."_

"_Goodnight Emmett." She smiled, turning over onto her side and ignoring me._

"_Rosie…" I poked her side. "Rosie baby…" She swatted my hand off her waist. "Baby you can't just leave me like this."With that she turned over and looked to where my finger was pointing, her grin grew devious. _

"_Maybe you should have thought about that before you pissed me off." She leaned over and kissed my cheek before rolling back onto her side. There was no use…_

"_I'm sorry… You're right. I'm wrong." I said, pulling her backside flush against me._

"_That's more like it… You're still not getting any tonight." She said, her voice taking on a teasing seductive tone and I groaned knowing she was doing it on purpose. It would be okay though…. She had one this battle… There was still a war to fight and though I appeased myself with the notion that I would win… I knew that with it came to her, she always won out in the end._

I walked into Charlie's room, half expecting to see Bella sitting there since she wasn't there when I left the house though his room was silent and he lay there asleep on the bed. She was probably with Edward. I _wanted_ to like him. I truly wanted to be okay with her spending all this time with him but I was terrified that he would do the same thing to her that Jacob had. I knew he wasn't a bad person. I had gotten to know him fairly well over the past two weeks and I knew he had a good heart, but he didn't know Bella… He didn't know how inexperienced she was, he didn't know her past, he didn't know how fragile she was and I was afraid that I would have to pick up the pieces again. But it was more than that… I was afraid that if she went through the same thing again, that this time she wouldn't come out of it alive.

"Emmett." I heard a voice say breaking my train of thought and I turned my head to look towards the door where Dr. Cullen stood.

"Hi Dr. Cullen." I smiled, trying to push away the thoughts that I was having.

"Please after everything that's happen this past week, call me Carlisle." He responded with a polite smile. "How are you?"

"I'm good. Trying to figure out where Bella ran off to."

"Would it be a good thing, or a bad thing, to mention that I was wondering the same thing about my son?"

I shrugged in my response and I noticed that the smile on Carlisle's face had faded as he watched my reaction.

"He means well Emmett."

"You're his father; you're bound to say that."

"I am by no means bound to say anything. What I can say is that I've never seen him so… _optimistic_ about the future since your sister arrived."

"He doesn't know what she's been through."

"You don't know what he's been through." That caught my attention and I turned to look at him, a small, sad smile playing on his lips.

"I suppose you're right."

"Give him a chance."

"I suppose after everything he's done for my dad I do owe him that much. Besides, he's too likable to not… But if he does anything to hurt her…"

"I will personally see to it that he is properly reprimanded." He grinned and I looked at him with shock, my eyebrows pulled together into a tight V. "I might not know your sister very well but I do remember her from when we moved into town…"

It was then that I understood what he was talking about. He had known about the pregnancy. _Of course…_

"I wouldn't let him anywhere near her if I thought her emotional well being was in jeopardy." His smile was warm and reassuring.

"I appreciate your silence on the matter…" I changed the subject, no longer wanting to hear about Edward Cullen's adoration of my sister.

"It was never my information to share."

"Still…"

"And… Just so you know… I've never spoken a word of it to any member of my family."

"I never suspected that you had..." I sighed. "Still… Thank you."

He nodded and looked towards the bed. "There was a reason why I stopped by this morning however."

"Is he okay?" I could feel my heart as it began to race in my chest with the notion that Charlie wasn't going to be okay. It would truly be the last thing that this family needed, the last thing Bella needed, they had only just begun to rekindle their relationship and though I knew they would move along quickly, I couldn't help but worry that if he did die, that if she didn't get to really mend the problems that they had, that it would be devastating for her.

"He's okay now… Edward did come in this morning to check on him, though I explicitly forbade him from stepping foot into this hospital… He had a minor heart attack early this morning, presumably from the shock. His body is very weak from the stress and that was a reaction to it all…"

"We never received a phone call."

"That is what Edward told me and I'm looking into the events. Miss Stanley was on call at the time and I have arranged a meeting with her to get to the bottom of this. I mainly wanted to inform you that the heart attack did happen and that I am doing everything I can to right this situation. I am very sorry about this."

"Jessica Stanley hates my sister… I'd assume that is probably part of the reason."

"Yes well… As I said, I'm looking into every angle of this, though she does appear to be the guilty party and it will be dealt with accordingly."

"Thank you Carlisle."

"You're welcome." He smiled before leaving me alone in the room with my thoughts. All I could wonder was when Bella would be back. It was truly driving me crazy not knowing what was happening between her and Edward and though it really wasn't my place or my business. Still, I had this innate desire to protect her, to make sure that her past, that her history did not repeat itself. I couldn't stop it the first time and I would always feel guilty for not truly being there for her, but I had the opportunity to make it right. And I wasn't going to stand around and watch her fall apart again. It was either talk to Bella or talk to Edward. Either way, a conversation was going to have to take place and I hoped Edward really was the man his father said he was.

**Edward's POV**

"Emmett is here." Her soft voice broke the silence that we had been riding in as we pulled into the parking lot of Forks Community Hospital. She pointed to the large Jeep that was covered in mud, presumably from the off road trip that he took a few days before Bella came into town.

"I should probably let you go speak with him then." I whispered, not really wanting to leave her, not wanting her to leave me.

"You can come with me."

"No… You've spent enough time with me today. Maybe you should spend some time with your family." I was trying to be rational, still the selfish part of me wanted nothing more than to drive far away from that hospital and take her with me.

"Oh…" She reached down and I heard the seat belt click as she pressed the button down to free herself. "Will I see you again today?" Her eyes were filled with a hope that I reveled in.

"If you want." I smiled, reaching my hand forward as I took some of her hair into my hand and admired its softness. "It's pretty obvious that I can't deny you anything."

"I do want to see you later…"

"I'll pick you up at your house after you have dinner with Emmett and Rosalie."

She grinned at me and my heart leapt in my chest. I could feel as my eyes traveled from her own to her lips and I watched as she licked them slightly and I suppressed the groan that was building in the back of my throat. Could I kiss her again? My body gave me an answer before I was rationally able to process it as my hand slid behind her head, pulling her face nearer to my own until our lips touched and a fire seemed to spread through my body. _Interesting… _I had thought that the first rush of tingles that occurred in the meadow were simply due to the build up, but that didn't seem to be the case as sitting there with her, my lips still felt as though they were on fire and this was definitely not our first kiss. It was better than before.

I pulled away before it became too intense, knowing full well that she had things to do this afternoon and heard the whimper that escaped from her lips as I pressed my own to her throat. I could feel her pulse, the rapid beating of her heart as the blood coursed through her veins. Her skin smelled lovely and I wondered how anyone could smell so appealing.

"You should go." I whispered, my lips now at the base of her neck, still breathing her in. And though I was urging her to leave I couldn't bring myself to pull my face from her neck. There was something oddly comforting, something so right as I listened to the erratic beating of her heart. "Emmett is probably wondering where you are."

"So I will see you later?" She said, her voice breathy as though she had forgotten to breathe and it brought a smile to my lips. I took pride in the fact that I could affect her in this way, at least it meant that the feeling was mutual, though I wasn't sure how she would react if she knew just what she did to me.

Reluctantly I sat back up, allowing my eyes to met her own. "I _will_ see you later."

I watched as she got out of the car and walked to the doors of the hospital, glancing briefly over her shoulder to smile at me once more before she entered. My breath hitched in my throat as I watched, my heart already seeming to ache at her leaving me. True, I would see her in a few hours but I knew that somehow they would be the longest hours of my life. I was, without a doubt, addicted to Bella Swan.

**Bella's POV**

Emmett was sitting in one of the chairs by the window when I walked into Charlie's room. Though I couldn't see his face I was certain that he was deep in thought and as I noticed that the window looked out onto the parking lot, I couldn't help but worry that this change in demeanor had to do with what he had probably just bore witness to. I stood at the door for a while, trying not to make a noise, wanting to merely observe him to try and determine where his mind was. I was afraid that I might be walking into a situation that I was not ready to handle.

"I know you're there Bells." He finally spoke, his eyes turning to look at me and I blushed a furious shade of red as I moved deeper into the room and stopped by the chair next to Emmett. His eyes seemed to burn into me as he continued to observe me and I wondered if he was angry with me, if he didn't agree with what was happening.

"Sorry, you looked occupied."

"Just my mind Bella… Just my mind."

"Well, that's a good change of events." I teased and for the first time, he smiled.

"Oh shut it." He chuckled before his features turned serious again. "Listen Bells…"

"I'm okay Em."

"I just want you to be careful…"

"He's different."

"You don't know that. You barely know him and you two looked so intimate in the car…" His voice trailed as his eyes moved back to the parking lot.

"I may have only just met him Emmett… But I do _know_ him."

"How can that be possible?"

I shrugged, how do you explain that kind of connection? "How did you know that you _knew_ Rose?"

"That's different."

I grimaced. "How is that possible?"

"Because I wasn't in your position… I didn't have the past that you have haunting me."

"He knows." I said quietly and he turned abruptly to look at me, his eyes racking over my face as though he was trying to figure out what had happened to me, what had caused this change of demeanor. "Listen… I'm not sure I can explain myself the way that you want me to but he knows me Emmett, and I know him and he makes me feel alive…" I felt the grin on my lips. "I'm not saying that everything from the past is fixed but when I'm with him, it almost doesn't matter anymore."

"I can't believe you told him."

"He would have found out eventually. He does have access to my medical records."

"Still…"

"It's okay Emmett. He's okay with it."I sighed.

"Please just… Don't rush into this… I don't want this to end the way things ended the last time."

"This is different."

"Are you sure?" He asked and I felt my stomach flop in my gut. _Was I sure? Was I absolutely positive that things wouldn't end just as terribly as they had with Jacob? _

"You can never be sure… But I'm not the same person, and things are different this time. He's different Emmett but I'm not sure I can explain it."

"You like him."

"A lot. He's the first person that I've liked this much in a very long time. Actually, if I am honest with myself, I'm not sure I've ever liked anyone as much as I like him." I replied and he grinned deviously.

"You know I'll still have to have that talk with him." I groaned.

"Do you have to?"

"It's my brotherly duties." He replied before his voice grew serious once again. "And I swear Bella… If he does _anything_ to hurt you, I will make sure that this one never walks again."

I sighed and shook my head. Emmett was telling the truth. I just hoped that I could get him to see that things were different this time around. I was different. Things weren't going to end up the way they had before. _Right?_

**A/N:**

**Okay… I realize it's not the BEST chapter I've written… It's more of a filler chapter… I wanted to see how people will respond if I bring in other characters POV… Hence my long section about Emmett. If you all like it I would like to further explore Emmett and Rosalie alongside of Edward and Bella… Though I'd like to bring Jasper and Alice as well the timing is just not right yet. Though Bella likes her, they still aren't close enough. Still… I might bring her in quicker as a comparison alongside Edward… We'll see… I want to see what people think.**

**So this was a chapter rich in dialogue… I hope that's okay… The next chapter should have more descriptions and internal feelings though even those might dissipate as the story goes along as both Bella and Edward have voiced their feelings for each other. **

**So… I'd really really like to get a lot of reviews for this chapter because I really am curious to see what you all thought of the section regarding Emmett and how things are playing out for Bella and Edward. I'm trying not to rush it too much… **

**Another thing: I've been toying with the idea of making a story for each book… I have plans for New Moon that I'm working through but I won't think too much about it if you all don't want that… Let me know so I can plan! **

**As always, thank you to my wonderful readers and reviewers!**

**Krooney**

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**I'm looking forward to seeing what you all have to say about this new chapter!**

**Hopefully I'll post again this week! I hope you all had a great weekend!**


	22. Chapter 22

**Baby You Can Stop Running  
Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight**

**Chapter Twenty Two**

_**Alice**_

I don't remember Edward and Elizabeth, not in the vivid ways that I know Edward does, though he has told me that his memories have faded slightly with time, a truth that I know pains him. But I do know how their death affected him, the way he has carried it with him since he learned the actual truth. If there was any way that I could comfort him, that I could make him feel better I would but any effort was always in vain. The only way he was ever going to move on would require him to actually admit to himself that he wasn't responsible for James, and that wasn't something he was willing to do.

I had hoped, along with mom and dad, that when he left to go to college that things would have changed. That, like with so many others who were venturing off on their own, he would have found a new perspective. Unfortunately, that wasn't the case. After many calls from his roommate, I was told that I had to go and see him. Both mom and dad knew that we were connected on a level that rivaled most biological siblings. He however, wouldn't open up no matter how hard I pressed him, so I became friends with his roommate, Jasper. I hadn't expected to fall for him, but it was one of those things that happened slowly, without my knowledge. We spoke frequently on the phone, he kept me informed about Edward's state of mind, and when I would visit once a month, I usually spent the time with him as Edward usually holed himself up in the library.

Jasper became my confidant over those three years that Edward spent at Dartmouth. I was able to tell him everything and anything and he always listened with such attentiveness that it always surprised me. I suppose it was one of the reasons that I fell so hard for him when I finally realized my feelings. He was always there to listen when I cried, cried over the brother that I had lost, cried over the fact that I was afraid I would never get him back, cried over the fact that I was certain that if something didn't change that he would end up hurting himself in a way that would take his life if he didn't accept his past and move forward.

I had gone to New Hampshire in the middle of their second semester when I finally confessed my feelings to him and I was thankful that he felt the same way. Edward of course, spent the whole time ignoring me but it didn't seem to matter, I had Jasper and he would be my connection to my brother for the time being. I could live with that. I suppose it didn't hurt that we spent that whole weekend in each other's arms, a place that until then I had only imagined. We've been together ever since and I can't imagine my life without him, though I'm fairly certain that I'm not going to have to worry about that.

Jasper was frustrated with him and I completely understood. I imagine that it was difficult spending your freshman year of college with someone who barely uttered more than five words a day and spent their entire time buried in biology books. But I did know that as they entered into their sophomore year, Edward did begin to open up a little… Though that probably had more to do with the fact that Jasper was going to be a permanent fixture in our lives, and over the course of the next few years, they had grown to be great friends. Still, I knew that there were things that he was unable to talk about with me or him. Things that I knew he needed to talk about but refused to all the same.

What broke my heart the most was how I could remember the Edward from the past and how he seemed to be gone forever. Burned into my memories was the loving, open brother that had helped me learn to ride my first bike, that punched my first boyfriend in the nose when I caught him kissing another girl, that laughed with me… I didn't know this new person that inhabited his body and I hated it. I had thought that if he could only just open up that things could have been different, that he could have found a way to move on but he was so stubborn that all he could do was cling to the past.

So you could imagine my surprise at how different he seemed to act. How, over the past few days, he was more like the brother of my past than the ghost he had become since Bella had come into town.

Edward had never been good at hiding his feelings from me, though that probably had more to do with the fact that I had the tendency to see into the future, a gift that was unexplainable and still seemed to make the members of my family slightly unnerved. And though he was hush on the subject of Bella, I could see the little changes in him, changes that made me believe that the brother that I had grown up with, the brother that I loved, was coming back to life. Though he would be the first to deny it, his posture had changed. He was more relaxed in his surroundings, and he seemed as though for the first time in years, he was happy. And I knew, that there was only one thing in his world that had changed, Bella.

"I'm just not sure that we should hang all his hope on a girl who might not even stay here in Forks." Jasper stated as we walked down the main street hand in hand on our way to one of the local diners to grab lunch.

"Are you saying you have no faith in my vision?"

"Did you see me coming darling?" He replied, a smile tugging on his lips and I fought the urge to reach up and smooth out the curls of his blonde hair.

"That's different; my own insecurities masked that vision."

"So did you ever stop to think that your own optimism is making you see something you want to see instead of what you really should see?"

"What do you mean?" I questioned, moving closer into his side as he wrapped his arm around my waist.

"It's just… She obviously has a past if seeing her ex-boyfriend cause that whole scene the other day… Why would she stay?"

"Because of love."

"I think you are putting too much pressure on this… I think you should just let it play out as it is suppose to."

"But they are perfect for each other!"

"That might be true but you can't force it Alice." He whispered into my hair as he leaned down and placed a kiss on the top of my head.

"I still think I'm right." I grinned.

"I never said you weren't. I just said that you should take a step back."

"Okay… If I promise to not be so pushy will you admit I'm right?"

He laughed and opened the door to the diner. "Okay. You're right. Happy?"

"Always!"

"Now…" He stated as we took a seat by the window. "Can we talk about other things?" He was smiling broadly as he reached forward and cupped my cheek with the palm of his hand.

"Like what?"

"Like the fact that I want you to move to Seattle with me in January."

"I'd love to move to Seattle with you Jasper!" I smiled, leaning across the table and kissing him.

_**Edward**_

I couldn't find the will to go back to the house that I shared with the rest of my family. Thanks to times like this, times when all I wanted was to be left alone with my thoughts, I cursed the day that I let Esme talk me into moving in with them. Her words rang through my memories, _"Edward it would be pointless for you to pay to rent your own house when we have a perfectly large one here already." "We have barely seen you over the past five years and we miss you." "Please Edward. For me?"_ I loved Esme, she had, after all, raised me, but I never should have allowed her to guilt me into moving into their house. Sure, I was part of their family, and yes, I always considered her and Carlisle my parents and Alice my sister, but there were times that I wasn't sure they really understood what I was going through, how I really felt. Their constant praise and worship always made me a little uncomfortable. But now, the desire for my own place was stronger than ever. For the first time I felt I had a reason to have my own place.

I had always been a rather private person, though moving back in with my family had changed that slightly. I didn't have the option to spend my time as a recluse, if it wasn't Alice, Esme would be knocking on my door trying to get me to come down. But after everything that happened today, all I wanted was privacy. Was it too much to ask for? I knew that as soon as my hand hit the doorknob and I took my first steps into the large, Victorian home that I would be assaulted with questions that I wasn't ready to answer yet. But it was more than that. If I lived in town, I would have been able to take Bella to my home, and I wouldn't have to worry about how she was feeling, if she felt awkward sleeping in a bed in my parents' home… It was all so _complicated _now. I felt the sigh escape my lips as I turned my head to the left, gauging traffic before pulling onto the 101. No, I would not go home just yet, instead I would allow the wheels of my Volvo to take me down the 101 for a while as I attempted to sort through the many thoughts that continued to flood my mind.

She hadn't run from me. In fact, her reaction had been so completely not what I was anticipating that it threw me off almost. I had spent the past five years running from everything that I had ever done, running from the past that seemed to haunt me and here she was, standing before me telling me that it didn't matter. It's so difficult to explain how that feels unless you've been in that situation, but the closest I can come to describing it is an actual light at the end of the tunnel. Bella was without a doubt, going to be my savior and I reveled in that understanding. I never would have expected anymore as perfect as her. But what if I let her down? The chances of that were high and it would kill me if I ever hurt her. I was unpracticed in the ways of relationships, this was all so new to me and the chances of failing were high. Bella wasn't the kind of girl that you just have a casual relationship with and that wasn't what I wanted. I wanted everything with her, I wanted to make her mine, and I wanted others to know that she was mine. Forever. But what if I wasn't good at it?

Driving was pointless and after twenty minutes I gave in, Forks was too small of a town. Instead of continuing on the straight road, I made a quick right turn and began the drive down the long country road to the house that I called home. _For now._ I couldn't help but think that with Bella around, purchasing my own place seemed more appealing than it had before. And maybe I could talk her into moving back to Forks… Moving in with me. Starting a life with me. I found that I had narrowed my eyes as I began to contemplate that. Could I ask her to give up her life in California? I had no idea what she even did there and I could feel my heart race in my chest. What if she didn't want to come here? Could I find work in San Francisco? Surely the city was large enough, and surely there were plenty of hospitals, but would she want me? The thoughts were fruitless, I had only known her three days and here I was contemplating my future with her. If I thought my past would scare her off, my thoughts of the future were sure as hell enough to accomplish that.

Alice was out on the porch before I could even shut the engine off and I tried not to scowl as I watched her in all her anticipation, shifting her weight from her left foot to her right. So much for even thinking that I would even make it into the door before they would begin their inquisition of my day. _Not that my day was over. I would just have to wait for Bella to call me_. I would have sat in the car, waited for her to retreat back in the house but if I knew my sister, I knew that she wouldn't leave me alone until I divulged each and every word that was spoken this afternoon. Not that I was going to go that far. No, she would have to settle for the cliff notes version.

"Where's Bella?" She questioned as I stepped out, she run down to the car and was standing by my side before I could even shut it. Bella's absence had probably been burning in her mind since she saw the empty passenger seat as I drove down the long driveway. Then again, she could have seen it coming after all. Maybe she thought I had chosen a different path?

"At the hospital with Charlie and Emmett."

"But I was certain she was going to come here." She was running her fingers through her short black hair as she pondered her thoughts. Alice was very, very rarely wrong and I was enjoying watching her inner turmoil. Maybe if I didn't tell her that I was planning on bringing her over later it would give her the hint that I wanted her to back off a little. I was truly afraid that her excitement would scare Bella off.

I shrugged and she closed her eyes.

"Edward!" She yelled. _Damn._ "She's going to call at 8."

"I hate it when you do that."

"I can't help it." She grinned. "So…"

"So."

"What happened this afternoon?"

"You can see the future. You tell me."

"Just because I can _see_ it… Doesn't mean I can _hear_ everything!"

"Too bad." I retorted as I opened the front door, pushing past my short sister in the process. I hated being so abrasive but at the same time, there were things that I wanted to keep to myself for a while. Things that only I wanted to know and the fact that Alice could see the future, that she knew what was going to happen before me… It only served to frustrate me even more. Granted… Maybe if I was nice enough I might get her to divulge some of that future to me. Like for instance, did she see Bella moving here for good? I shook my head. No… What was the fun in that? I needed to pursue Bella… I needed to show her that I cared about her, that I wanted her in my life. For good.

"You do that." Alice spoke, interrupting my train of thoughts and I turned to look at her, a smile as wide as the Grand Canyon displayed on her small face.

"Do what?"

"You'll see soon enough."

"Alice I really hate it when you do that." I muttered. "Your cryptic messages really get on my nerves. Either tell me what you see or keep it to yourself."

"I know… It's why I do it." She giggled and skipped off into the kitchen while I fought the urge to flip her the bird. "Mom's going to walk down the stairs, wouldn't want her to catch you doing that!"

I groaned loudly before collapsing my body onto the plush white couch. Round one down… One more to go.

"Edward sweetheart when did you get home?" Esme asked and I looked up to see her peering at me from the back of the couch, a small smile pulling at her lips. _Alice probably told her too. Where was Carlisle when you need him? I'm being ganged up by a bunch of women who know me well enough to know that I can't lie to them_.

"A few minutes ago."

"Where were you? You didn't come home last night." She smiled knowingly. I bit back the sigh that was fighting to escape my lips but I knew that unlike Alice, I could not ignore Esme's questioning.

"I was with Bella." It only took those four words to make Esme's entire face light up and I couldn't help but feel the warmth that radiated from her.

"Is that so?" I nodded and, though I didn't want to tell her everything, I was thrilled to see her so happy. I knew that this was something she had wanted for me for a long time now. "When do we get to meet this girl?"

"Tonight!" Alice called from the kitchen where she was presumably attempting to make dinner. My mother merely lifted her eyebrows as she watched me and I shrugged my shoulders.

"I suppose I wouldn't bet against Alice but she is going to call me when she finishes dinner with her brother and his girlfriend."

"I knew that there was something behind that song… Or shall I say someone…" Her voice trailed off wistfully.

"Esme sweetheart, leave the boy alone." Carlisle's voice filled the large room and she turned to look at him, her smile still wide and I couldn't help but notice his own lightness of being. I envied their relationship, that after some twenty years of marriage they were still so in love. I knew that I would be happy to have one-tenth of their passion in my future. His gaze met my own, pulling me from my thought, and I watched as his face turned serious. "I spoke to Emmett about Charlie and I am meeting with Jessica in the morning."

"Tell me there will be repercussions for her actions. We can't have a nurse who fails to alert the family when something happens. I swear if I had the authority I would have fired her on the spot." I said through gritted teeth. I had my suspicions as to why Jessica had failed to notify the Swan family of Charlie's heart attack and they all involved her jealousy of Bella.

"There _will_ be repercussions, I can assure you that but until I've spoken with her and other nurses who were at the hospital early this morning, I cannot accuse her of anything."

"It's not an acquisition if there is proof on the chart!"

"I know how vested you are in this case Edward. I promise that I will look at all angles." He raised his eyebrow as he spoke, as though telling me that I had to separate my feelings for Bella from the actuality of the case.

"I want to be there when you have this conversation."

"No."

"Carlisle please."

"Edward we both know that you will merely lose your temper and I cannot have that happening." He replied and I sighed. He was right. My anger with Jessica at the moment was reaching record peaks. Her actions had been inexcusable and I did have the tendency to let my temper get the better of me.

"So... How was your afternoon?" Carlisle spoke, filling the silent void that had grown in the room. It was only then that I noted that Esme had likely gone to join Alice in the kitchen.

"Not you too!" I replied, my voice tinged with slight exasperation. "It was… Better than I expected." I watched as he lifted his eyebrows again.

"Care to exaggerate?" I shrugged and he continued to talk instead, letting me contemplate just how much I wanted to tell him. "Well then… I should inform you that Emmett isn't very pleased with your perusal of his sister." My eyes widened with his comment causing me to straighten my posture and sit straight up, my eyes never leaving my father's face. "He likes you…. Don't take that the wrong way. He's just concerned."

"That makes sense. I have always known he was protective over her."

"There's a reason behind that." He started, pausing for only a moment. "It's not my place to interfere and I will not tell you anything that I am not able to divulge but Bella has a past that rivals your own, in a way that has affected the person that she is right now."

"I know." He cocked his head to the side as he stared at me with a contemplative expression.

"What?"

"She told me."

"I hadn't realized…"

"This afternoon." I spoke and he nodded his head. I knew what he was going to ask next, I could see it in his face so I didn't bother to give him the chance to ask. "She knows everything."

"Everything, everything?"

"Everything."

"How do you feel?"

I felt a small smile pull on my lips. "Like a weight has been lifted… I didn't think that anyone could possibly still look me in the eye if they knew the truth but she did… She still wants to be around me."

He smiled back. "Now do you believe that you deserve happiness son?"

"I wouldn't go so far as saying that… But if I have a chance at it I'm not going to ignore it either."

I felt his hand on my shoulder and he gave it a gentle squeeze. "Everything will work out," He spoke softly before releasing his grasp on my shoulder and walking into the other room leaving me alone with my thoughts.

I glanced at the clock, 6:30. If Alice was correct I would only have to wait an hour and a half more before I could see her again, before I could kiss her soft lips and hold her in my arms. Nothing felt as good as Bella in my arms, her soft body pressed against mine, her warm breath against my neck… I wanted nothing more than to be at her side once again. Maybe Carlisle was right. Maybe this was how things were suppose to be. I was supposed to be with her, we were supposed to save each other from the pasts that had spent so many years hunting us. I couldn't continue to deny that anything that felt this good could possibly be bad, and I resolved to forget the past and move forward with my future. A future that included Bella.

_**Bella**_

I paced around the house for a while as I looked at the phone number that was scribbled on a piece of paper. Edwards number. It shouldn't have been this difficult, had we not spent the entire afternoon deep in conversation about everything that had been haunting us? So what was calling him so difficult?

"Bella, stop pacing before you sprain your ankle!" Emmett chuckled as Rose snuggled into his shoulder.

"Sorry…" I replied, biting my lip as I looked down at my cell and then to the clock. 7:59. I pressed send and listened to the ringing.

"Bella!" I could almost hear his smile as he answered it.

"How did you know it was me?"

"I wasn't expecting anyone else." His velvet voice made me smile. "So am I to assume you want me to come over?"

"I was hoping to go somewhere else… I don't really want to watch Emmett and Rose all night." I replied walking into the other room so they wouldn't hear me.

"I'll be there soon." He spoke and I smiled widely.

"I'll be waiting."

**A/N:**

**Wow. I'm really glad you all liked the last chapter… And I'm taking into account the comments about a possible sequel. As of right now I am planning on doing a New Moon type story though it might not be what you expect… I wouldn't want to break Bella any more than she already is so not to fret about that… And we all know how I feel about Jacob… So… Anyways I do have ideas for it, it does involve Elizabeth. **

**So… The next chapter is going to be rather fluffy… And then we are going to move into the drama.**

**I want to thank my readers and of course, my reviewers!**

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**Thank you all so much! Hopefully I'll have another update this weekend… I'm heading into finals week though and my thesis is due next Friday but after this semester is over I will be writing with much more frequency… My final semester of college is going to be very easy for me so I will be much better at updating as well!**

**I hope that you enjoyed the chapter… Some Bella/Edward fluff is coming in the next chapter! Yay! I love fluff.**

**Now… Off to see Four Christmases!**

**Looking forward to hearing what you have to say! **


	23. Chapter 23

**Baby You Can Stop Running  
Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight. All Characters are Stephanie's Meyers… Oh and some of the words in this chapter are hers as well… I just made some minor alterations.**

**Chapter Twenty Three**

_**Bella**_

I paced nervously around the house, my eyes occasionally darting to the window as I looked for Edwards Volvo and I could feel Emmett's eyes on me though Rosalie was doing everything she could to get him to relax. He knew that Edward was coming over and I was dreading having him walk into the house to meet the firing squad, because I knew that was exactly what Emmett was preparing himself for. Things were only just finally settling in for the two of us and the last thing I wanted was Emmett scaring him off, because truly, that was what that conversation was going to do.

"Bella, Edward better man up and come inside when he comes to get you." His voice broke through the loud thoughts in my head and I stopped pacing to turn to look towards the couch. For once I was thankful that Emmett had not followed in Charlie's footsteps, otherwise I would have been certain that the rifle would be resting on his legs just waiting…

"Emmett… Please not tonight." I pouted, my eyes darting to Rose who merely sat there, her face contemplative.

"I'm not going to do anything." He said somberly before his face broke out into a smirk. "Much…"

"Emmett I think you should let them be for a little while…" Rosalie interrupted and I looked at her, saying a silent thank you.

"But I just want to have a little fun." He grinned. "I should get Dad's riffle. That will be sure to scare him."

"NO!" I shouted and clasped my hands over my mouth as both sets of eyes flew onto my body, shocked by my loud outburst. "I mean… No?" My cheeks were hot with embarrassment and Emmett's loud laugh billowed through the small family room.

"I'm only kidding Bella."

"No you weren't."

"Okay, maybe I wasn't."

"My point exactly." I replied, my eyes casting a glance back out the window. The street was still quiet. "Please Emmett… We are still trying to figure things out."

"Fine Bella… One week… Then I have the talk."

"Three weeks." I retorted.

"A week and a half."

"Fine." I grumbled. I would give in now, but when the time came, I would argue with him again.

A flash of silver caught my eye and I bolted to the door, grabbing my purse as I made my way, all the while hoping that I could make it to his car before my vendetta against gravity took over.

_**Edward**_

"Whoa… Where's the fire?" I smiled as Bella jumped into the passenger side seat of my car, not even giving me the chance to get out and open her door for her.

She was panting, slightly out of breath from the exertion. "Just… Go…"

"What's wrong?" I could hear the panic in my voice as I pulled back onto the road and began the drive towards my own home.

"Emmett." She grumbled and I turned my head to look at her, about to ask her what he had done. "Don't ask." With that I was silenced. "Where are we going?"

"I hope you don't mind but I told Esme that I would bring you by…" I moved my hand in an attempt to tug at my hair but she caught it with her own and squeezed it slightly in a reassuring manner which made me smile.

"I don't mind at all." I turned my head and looked at her, noticing that she had changed her shirt. She was wearing blue again and I bit my lip slightly.

"You look lovely by the way." I finally spoke, and watched as her cheeks reddened. The rest of the ride was silent, except for the music that was playing softly and ten minutes later I pulled into the driveway.

She sat there and I was thankful for that, at least this time I could make it to her door and open it before she could protest. Still, she must have been lost in thought because I saw her jump slightly as the door opened and I realized that she was still buckled in.

"What if they don't like me?" She whispered and stepped out. I instinctively reached for her hand.

"They will adore you." I assured her and walked to the porch, my thumb rubbing small circles on the back of her hand in an attempt to calm her. I paused at the door before turning to look at her. "You don't have to do this if you don't want to ."

She let out a soft sigh before her gaze meet my own. "No… I want to."

I smiled and opened the door, pulling her in with me. Carlisle and Esme stood there waiting to greet us, they knew how long it took to get into town but it still startled me for a moment, but then I saw the smiles on their faces and I relaxed immediately. They were happy to meet her… They loved her just as much as I did and they hadn't even met her yet, well, at least not formally.

"Carlisle, Esme," I spoke softly, still holding onto Bella's small hand, "this is Bella."

"It's so nice to see you again Dr. Cullen." She spoke and he smiled back at her. I assumed they had met back when Bella had lived in Forks… She had probably hurt herself somehow. I flinched at the thought that something could have happened and I could have done nothing to protect her from it.

Carlisle stepped forward and extended his hand towards her which she took in the one that was not gripping onto my own. "Please, no need for formalities. Call me Carlisle." He smiled and I watched as she grinned back at him and I felt myself instantly relax.

When they dropped hands, Esme stepped forward, a brilliant smile on her face as she moved closer and took Bella's hand into her own.

"It's very nice to know you."

"Thank you. I'm glad to meet you too." And I could tell she was. The smile on her face was bright and I dropped her hand and wrapped my arm around her waist, pulling her into me, my eyes making contact with Esme's whose shone with unshed tears.

"Where are Alice and Jasper?" I asked though only seconds later I heard her voice booming though the quiet.

"Hey Edward!" She said enthusiastically as she ran down the stairs, a streak of black and white before stopping in front of Bella. I noticed the looks that both Carlisle and Esme shot her, the one that told her to relax and calm down.

"Hi Bella!" She smiled and leaned forward and kissed her cheek. I stiffened for a moment but relaxed when I saw Bella smiling, obviously enjoying the attention that my family was showering her with. I was thankful that they liked her, if they hadn't I wasn't sure what I would have done… Though, I don't think that was ever going to be a problem. Loving Bella wasn't hard to do.

"Hello Bella." Jasper smiled and it surprised me. He had been so reserved before, though it was probably obvious, even to him, that Bella wasn't going anywhere. He was my best friend… He would have to get to know her now.

"Hello Jasper." She smiled back before turning her attention back towards Esme. "I wanted to tell you before, but you have a beautiful home."

"Thank you," Esme smiled proudly. "We are so glad that you came."

I noticed Bella's gaze land on the piano that she had seen me sitting at when she had spent the night and the look had not gone unnoticed by Esme.

"Do you play?" She asked her.

"No not at all. But it's beautiful."

"Did Edward tell you he was musical?" I felt my cheeks redden with embarrassment at Esme's hidden praise. I knew Bella wouldn't pick up on it, but I knew what she was getting at.

"Yes… Well… Actually I intruded on him playing the other night. I shouldn't have been surprised to find that out though… Edward can do everything right?"

Jasper laughed and Esme looked towards me, her eyes reprimanding me without words, the ultimate mother look.

"I hope you haven't been showing off… It's rude and I taught you better than that." She scolded.

"Just a bit." I laughed and I watched as her face softened and I could tell that she could see my comfort with Bella. That she could see just how much this girl before me meant to me and I knew that she was happy about it, that it was everything she had ever hoped that I would find someday. Everything that I thought I would never find but somehow had.

"He's been too modest really." Bella insisted, as though she was trying to stick up for me, not realizing that Esme had forgiven me.

"Well… Play for her."

"You just said showing off was rude."

"There are exceptions to every rule."

"I'd like to hear you play again." She said softly, her eyes meeting my own.

"I can't deny you anything." I smiled, reaching down and pushing a few strands of hair off her cheek and I could feel Esme's happiness radiate from her person as she watched the exchange.

I pulled Bella to the piano bench and had her sit beside me as I began to play. She hadn't noticed but I had, that the room had emptied and it wasn't until I was finished that she looked around and noticed that it was empty as well.

"Where did they go?" She asked, her head now on my shoulder.

"Very subtly giving us some privacy I suppose."

"They like me?" It was more a question than a statement and I wrapped my arm around her waist pulling her closer and burying my nose in the long strands of her hair, breathing in the soft smell of strawberries and freesias, knowing that I would never be able to smell either ever again and not think about her.

"They adore you." I smiled, before pulling away reluctantly and tugging her up with me. "Come on… I'll show you around."

_**Bella**_

The house was larger and more beautiful than I had remembered, though that night had been rather stressful. Still, I enjoyed the tour Edward gave me, before we ended at his room, and he shuffled his feet nervously before looking down at me.

"This is my room." He said softly as I walked in, glancing around.

I looked around for a while, before noticing that he was sitting on the bed just observing me and suddenly I felt self conscious. He reached a hand forward, beckoning me to join him and I did, knowing that it was the only place I really wanted to be and as I approached him, he wrapped his hand around my own and pulled me towards the bed until I was sitting next to him.

"It seems to be much easier for you now…" I whispered as I felt his hand on my heart as we sat in the stillness of his room. I wondered for a moment if Alice might barge in but any thoughts of that had been instantly dispelled as I felt his cool lips against my warm neck.

"Does it seem that way to you?" He murmured, and I felt my heart beating erratically in my chest and I prayed that he couldn't hear it, or feel it for that matter. His hand reached up and cupped the back of my head, his long fingers laced in my hair and I suppressed the moan that was aching to be let out, afraid that if I did it might cause him to stop.

"Much easier." I said, exhaling slowly so he couldn't hear the breathlessness in my voice. He didn't respond but merely continued his exploration of my neck, occasionally letting his tongue glide along the surface, sending chills down my spine.

"Why is that?" I finally spoke, my voice shaking.

"Mind over matter…" He breathed, his warm breath fanning over me and I thought I might faint. "I don't care anymore… I'm trying to just be in the moment with you… To enjoy this." His finger was now on the back of my neck and I felt him drag it slowly over the exposed flesh causing my body to tremble slightly.

I pulled back and watched as he froze, his face contorting into an expression that I couldn't read and for a moment I couldn't hear his breathing. Had my sudden movement's caused him to think that I wasn't enjoying what he was doing? Because it wasn't that at all. I pulled away because I was enjoying all too much and I was afraid that if he continued I wouldn't be able to stop myself from whatever actions my body might force myself to make.

"Did I do something wrong?" His voice was low and worried as I watched his green eyes darken momentarily.

"No – quite the opposite actually. You're driving me crazy." I explained, my hand reaching forward to touch his hand and I watched as he considered my words.

"Really?" A triumphant smile lit his face and I couldn't help but think that he looked like a man who had just been told all his dreams were coming true.

I rolled my eyes. "Would you like a round of applause?"

He merely continued to grin and I felt my cheeks heat with embarrassment.

"I'm just pleasantly surprised." He replied as he moved closer, the heat from his body now palpable again and I closed my eyes and breathed in his wonderful, musky scent. "In the last few years, I never imagined anything like this. I didn't believe I would ever find someone I wanted to be with… And then to find, even though it's all new to me, that I'm good at it… That I'm good at being with you…"

"You're good at everything." I grinned and watched as he shrugged before we both started to chuckle at that. It was true, in everything that I had seen, Edward was absolutely perfect at everything he did and the fact that he doubted that he could be good at being in a relationship was startling. Of course he would be perfect. He was perfection personified.

"You still seem more relaxed." I noted as he pulled me up into his lap and I laid my head against his shoulder.

"As I said… Mind over matter." He replied and I felt his lips once again, this time against the crown of my head.

"But you won't try and leave now will you?" I found myself scowling at the thought that he might leave. I wasn't sure what I would do if he did. Now that we were here, that I had discovered what it felt like to be wrapped in his arms, to have his lips against my own, I wasn't sure I would be able to survive without him. I needed him like I needed air. He was quiet for a long while and it stirred up a panic deep within me and my mouth spoke before I had the time to process the words. "Don't go away."

"That suits me." I felt him relax and I looked up to watch as a gentle smile graced his lips. "Bring on the shackles – I am your prisoner." He was laughing softly as he buried his face in my hair and he wrapped his hands around my wrists and I was suddenly conscious of how small my hands were in comparison to his own. His laugh was beautiful and I was certain that I had never heard anything more melodic than that and I savored it, tried to memorize it in my mind. I had never heard him laugh more than he had tonight.

"You seem more… optimistic than usual." I observed before continuing. "I mean… You were so cynical earlier today… This is quite a change. Not that I'm complaining."

"Isn't this how it's supposed to be?" He questioned, releasing my wrist and putting his fingers under my chin, forcing me to look up at him. He was still smiling and I forgot to breathe.

"How what's suppose to be?" I questioned lamely and I realized I was panting.

"The glory of first love, and all that. It's incredible, isn't it? The difference between reading about something, seeing it in the pictures, and experiencing it?"

"Very different." I agreed and it was true. I had never felt anything like this before in all my life, even with Jacob who I had thought I truly had been in love with. How wrong had I been? There was absolutely no comparison between the two. This was where I belonged, right here, wrapped in Edwards arms.

"For example." His words flowed freely and swiftly and though I was having trouble being coherent with his body so close to my own I closed my eyes and focused on his words. "The emotion of jealousy. I've read about it a hundred thousand times, seen actors portray it in a thousand different plays and movies. I believe I understood that one pretty clearly, though I had never felt it before… But it shocked me." He paused for a moment as I looked up my eyes meeting his own. "When Lauren mentioned that Mike had broke up with Jessica because of you…

"I was surprised by the flare of resentment, almost fury, that I felt – I didn't recognize what it was at first as the only emotions I could ever remember feeling were guilt and anger… Then I began to wonder if you might want to be with him… He was a much better choice for you than I had imagined I could be even though I wanted you to be with me, even then. I knew I had no right to be so upset about it, and I _tried_ not to care. But I couldn't stop the feeling from existing within myself.

"But jealousy… it's a strange thing. So much more powerful than I would have thought. And irrational! Vile Mike Newton…" His face contorted into a mixture of a snarl and someone who had just smelt something terribly disgusting and I tried hard to suppress the laugh that was rising within my chest, but then we both broke out into a quiet laughter for a few moments until a comfortable silence had fallen between us once again.

I thought for a minute before speaking. "_That_ made you jealous though? Laruen saying that Mike was after me? Really? I've barely even spoken to him since I've been back."

"And I'm supposed to know that? You need to remember Bella… This is all new to me. You're resurrecting the human within me, and everything feels so strong because it's so fresh." His head nuzzled my neck and I sighed with contentment, nothing had ever felt this good before.

"But honestly Edward… For that to bother you?" I teased. "I see you and then I look at me and I can't help but wonder when your fascination with me is going to end… You deserve the very incarnation of beauty…" He pressed one of his long, pale fingers to my lips to silence me.

"There is no competition for my heart Bella. You have it. One hundred percent. No one can possess one tenth, no, one hundredth of the attraction that you hold for me." He was serious now as his eyes met my own once again. They were light and filled with a warmth that I basked in. "For the past seventeen years, I've walked alone, all the while thinking that I could be complete within myself, thinking that I could be alone, that it was the only option that I had. Never once did I realize that there could be something greater for me, not realizing what was waiting for me all this time, and not finding anything because you hadn't come into my life yet."

"It hardly seems fair…" I whispered. "That you should think that you didn't deserve anyone… And I had already been with someone. Why should I get off so easily?"

"You're right." His chuckle was morbid. "I should make this harder for you… You've only been through hell and back with Jacob…" I watched the scowl appear on his face for a moment but it was gone just as quickly as it appeared. "And you only might be risking your life by being with me if anyone were to ever come looking for me because of what I had done to James. What's that worth?"

"Very little… I feel deprived of nothing." I stated easily.

"For now…" He said softly, and I could hear that there was a hint of grief in his voice.

We were silent for a long while until I felt the exhaustion from the day wash over my body and I involuntarily yawned.

"Should I get you home?" He asked and I shook my head.

"I don't want to go anywhere." I replied, knowing that tomorrow would be like facing the Spanish inquisition when I would see Emmett but I didn't care, it didn't matter. I just knew that when I slept with Edward, when I feel asleep tucked into his arms, sleep had never come so easily or so peacefully and that was all I wanted.

"Then maybe I should give you something to change into." It was more a statement than a question and I watched as he pulled himself up off the bed and I let go of him reluctantly. I kept my eyes on him as he riffled through his drawers before shutting them and walking back, in his hands he carried what looked like boxers and a white undershirt.

"I would give you the sweat pants you had on the other night but they haven't been washed yet." He stated as he held the clothes out for me before pointing to another door off the corner that I hadn't noticed before. "The bathroom is right there."

"Will you be here when I come back? Or am I suppose to sleep in the guest bedroom?"

"You can sleep wherever you are comfortable."

"I'll be back." I smiled and jumped from the bed, carefully making my way to the door and feeling his eyes on my back the entire way while I tried hard not to trip.

_**Edward**_

I had changed into a pair of black pajama pants and stood by the bed, causally pulling the pillows off the bed before she returned and I almost gasped for air at the sight of her in my clothing. Suddenly I felt exposed and regretted not wearing a shirt but as I watched her eyes travel over my chest and the blush that appeared on her cheeks when I caught her, I smiled.

I got into the bed and watched as she did the same on the other side before she moved closer to me, giving me the go ahead to wrap my arms around her and when I did she snuggled deep into my side. I pressed my lips against her forehead and closed my eyes for a moment to memorize the feeling.

I began to hum for a moment before she looked up at me through heavy eye lids.

"Should I sing you to sleep?" I asked and she smiled before reaching up and running her fingers through my unruly hair. I watched her nod and before I began to hum the lullaby that I had made just for her, I leaned down and pressed my lips to hers one last time before pulling her closer to by body, listening to her breathing until I knew she was sound asleep. Only then did I finally allow sleep to take me as well.

**A/N:**

**100 apologies for how long it's taken to get this chapter out… Finals week was crazy and I only just finished my thesis at around 10:30PM and I've been more or less working on this ever since as I had gone through serious writing withdrawal… I was so sick of writing about Judicial Hellholes and Legal Climates that I really needed a creative escape…**

**It's been snowing here in Washington for a week now… It's absolutely beautiful. I usually hate this town… But this town with snow is so worth it (I'm contemplating a drive up towards Seattle to see the city covered in snow… I went to SeaTac today to drop a friend off at the airport and that was pretty but Seattle must be beautiful right now)… Though I'm looking forward to going back to California on Monday… I pray my flight isn't cancelled because it's supposed to snow a lot more this weekend… For the three years that I've been here (last year didn't count, I was in London) I've never seen this much snow… I'm definitely bring my snowboard back up here with me. ANYWAYS… Enough about the snow, even though I love it.**

**So I think I like this chapter the most out of all the ones that I've written and I'm looking forward to see what everyone else has to say!**

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	24. Chapter 24

**Baby You Can Stop Running  
Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight… Or Les Mis (that belongs to Victor Hugo)…**

**Chapter Twenty Four**

_**Edward**_

_Take my hand and lead me to salvation. Take my love, for love is everlasting. And remember, the truth that once was spoken, to love another person is to see the face of God._ I can clearly remember the words spoken by Jean Valjean , having read Les Miserables both in high school and in college, though they had never much meant anything to me before. Yet as I lay here, with my angel in my arms, her leg casually draped over my hip as though trying to pull me closer, the words finally seem all too clear to me now. She had led me to this point in my life, she had shown me the person that I really am, the person that I could be if I allowed myself and in doing so, I had found something to believe in. For that, I knew I would love her forever, I knew that from the deepest depths of my soul, even if she found that she no longer wanted me, I could never stop loving her. Still, I knew that I would never give up… That I knew just how lucky I would be if I were able to spend the rest of my life with her, though even that didn't seem like enough to me.

The soft glow from the morning sun illuminated the room and I could hear a soft moan from my left and I knew she was beginning to stir. Surprisingly enough, her phone had remained more dormant than her, as she had murmured all night, and I had been lucky to be woken to hear some of it. Still, I couldn't help but feel the nagging sense of dread in my stomach. How would Emmett react? Carlisle had already made it apparent that he disliked how close she and I had become and, yes, I'll be the first to admit it has been quick, but at the same time, nothing has ever felt so right to me before in my life. Surely he would understand? Surely he had once felt this passionately about Rosalie, after I explained myself, he would understand and a common comradeship would be formed and all would be right in the world. I would have the blessing of her brother as well was the love of a magnificent woman. Still… I suppose I'd still have to get Charlie's approval… I shuddered with the thought. He might not deem me worthy enough.

I basked in the warmth of her body and turned slightly to gaze upon her. Though I had woken up frequently throughout the night, I was only noting that for once it was not from the nightmares that had haunted me since James… They were always the same: a flash of my parent's murder (though too young and not around to witness the events… They had been heavily detailed at the trials and my own subconscious had formulated it into a movie scene that I often seemed to bear witness to), a flash of the trial, the look on James' face just before the executioner injected the anesthesia, and finally his face as he promised his revenge and the terrible, shrill laugh that my parents driver had once described to me. But they had not come last night and for the first time in almost ten years, I felt free, and I knew that it was because of Bella.

My prior fear of sleeping were much like a child's fear of the monsters in the closet, only I never had anyone who could chase the memories from my mind like a father or mother might 'chase' the monsters for their child before bedtime. I had grown accustomed to living off only a few hours of sleep because I demanded it, unwilling to allow myself to sleep through the horrors that my mind wanted me too. But Bella had changed all that. I realized that the monster of my mind was merely I. My own guilt manifesting itself within me, and I fed it… I allowed it to take shape but just like the parent did for the child, she had managed to dispel him from within me. No longer did I feel the nagging on the back of my throat; no longer did I feel the heavy guild in my mind… She had made it all okay; she had told me that though what I had done was not necessarily right… I had done it because it was the only manner that had made sense logically to me at the time, that it was an action that many might do if they were placed in my situation as well. _I was not the monster I had allowed myself to become._ It was an epiphany… It was the start of my new life.

I felt her move closer, her head nuzzling against the crook in my chest and I turned my head and buried it in the long waves of her chocolate brown hair, closing my eyes tightly as I breathed in the scent of strawberries. Though I had learned about her past… Though she had gone through every painful detail of her prior relationship with Jacob, I couldn't help but worry that there were too many things in her present that would ever keep her from moving back to Forks and I wasn't sure that I would be able to ask her to move here, even if she wanted me too.

My knowledge of her current life was scarce and extended to only the few details that Emmett had once told me on a long night when he was upset about Charlie's condition and wrestling with the idea of telling Bella about what had happened. He had said that she had moved to California. That after living in Phoenix with their mother, the rain had never been something she enjoyed and California, though still having some rain, would have quieted her hated for the rain and allowed her to live in an environment somewhat like that of the one she had when living with Renee. He had said how much she had loved Stanford and how, though they had once talked about moving to Seattle together after she had graduated, she had chosen to remain in California, moving thirty minutes north to San Francisco where she had been offered a job as a junior curator at the Museum of Modern Art. But that was the extent of my knowledge. Did she enjoy it? Would she think to give it up? Those were all questions I could not answer, and questions I was afraid to ask. Afraid that if she did love it, that as soon as the issues with Charlie were resolved, she would be on the next flight back there leaving me with my heart missing. My heart ached at the mere thought of her leaving. How unbearable would it be if she did leave?

"Mmm. You're still here!" Her voice was thick with sleep though I could hear the excitement in it as it broke through my thoughts. I looked down to see her deep brown eyes staring up at me with an intensity that took me by surprise.

"Of course I'm still here. Why would you think otherwise?"

"You were gone yesterday." She spoke wryly and I felt my face fall slightly. How could I make her understand that though I would give up everything in this lifetime to wake up next to her, the very act of what we were doing was only going to make the future more painful? If she were to leave me I would only be left of memories of this… Of her sleep laden eyes, of her messy bed hair, of the bright smile that possessed her face as she looked upon me for the first time of the day… It all served to only make me fall harder.

My silence must have made her think I was unhappy, because her voice was soft and timid as she continued. "It's nice… waking up with you."

"You have no idea." I pulled her closer to me, knowing that there were no other words that I could speak that wouldn't scare her off so I did what I thought would be second best. I leaned down to press my lips against her own, however, she pulled away and I did all I could to hide the hurt and confusion that I was certain was plastered across my brow.

"Morning breath."

"Oh… I hadn't realized…"

"No… It's not you. It's me."

"That's the most clichéd line anyone has ever used in bed before." I replied, the left side of my lip curving up into a half smile.

"That's not what I meant."

"Then what did you mean Miss. Swan." I somehow managed to keep a straight face, though I was doing all I could to keep from laughing as she attempted to work her way out of the predicament that she had talked herself into.

"I meant that I didn't want you to kiss me when _my_ breath was stale." Her body was almost on top of me now, as though she was trying to restrain me from leaving, as though she had thought she had offended me enough to make me flee in anger.

"I don't care about that… Obviously. I just want to kiss you again… I've been waiting for hours." I smiled, rolling her off of me so we were laying side-by-side before reaching ahead and brushing her hair off her neck.

"Hours huh?" She whispered as I leaned forward again to kiss her neck. "That's kind of creepy, Dr. Cullen… Watching me sleep and all."

"I'm a doctor… I was making sure that you were still breathing."

She laughed a soft, musical laugh that hit my core. "Oh I see… So you were only observing for medical reasons… That's less creepy… And a much better excuse…"

"Much." I smiled against her neck before nipping at it slightly trying to weaken her resolve. "Now… Do I get to kiss you or not? Because either way I'm not ready to let you get out of this bed yet."

I felt her hands as they tugged on my messy hair, though she had yet to speak any words. "Bella?" I spoke before continuing my assault on her neck, making sure to give up before any telltale bruising would occur. I didn't want to give Emmett a reason to distrust me after all. She only tugged harder of my hair and let a soft moan escape her lips. I took that to mean yes and began to move up, finally reaching the place I wanted and captured her lips with my own. Though I expected a small fight, her resolve was weakened and she seemed to melt into it and I barely had to beg for entrance into her mouth. Before I knew what had happened, she was underneath me, with her legs wrapped tightly around my waist as she began to grind her hips against my obvious state of arousal. Still… I had to pull away. It would not be like this.

"How did you sleep?" I asked, after rolling off of her before pulling her into my side. I could hear her panting as she attempted to regain her breath and I smiled knowing that I had been the one to leave her breathless.

"You tell me Dr. Cullen. You were the one who watched me all night." She grinned wickedly at me and I felt the blush on my cheeks as the blood pooled in them. _Better the cheeks then the groin._

"You _seemed_ to be enjoying yourself." _Two can play at this game._ Her cheeks instantly flamed.

"I was talking again wasn't I?" I nodded and heard her groan, a sound that, though she hadn't meant it to, sounded all too sexual and seemed to stimulate blood flow to the area that I was hoping to avoid. "What did I say?"

"Nothing too bad. Why what were you dreaming about?" I grinned and watched as she blushed even more and I was enjoying the torture… Enjoying the blush that not only pooled on her face, but on her neck and, though I couldn't see it, I assumed on her chest as well. _You are a sick man Cullen… A sick man…_

"Nothing much…" Her voice trialed and I knew that she meant more than that but I had teased her enough for one day…

"You just said that your chin was itchy…"

"It is! Stupid stitches."

"Just a few more days love… Then I can take them out and you will be as good as new." I smiled, letting my thumb graze the white bandage. "You said my name too."

"How often?"

"A few times." She groaned again. "I didn't stay awake all night…"

"I hope I didn't say anything embarrassing. I hate that I talk in my sleep."

"I happen to love that you talk in your sleep. You said you loved me."

"You already knew that."

"It's still nice to hear nonetheless."

"I love you." She said softly and I knew she meant it. I her words flooded my system and I felt as though I was ready to burst.

"You have no idea how happy that makes me." I replied, running my fingers through her hair. "I've been so afraid that if I spoke those words you would go running… I'm not afraid to anymore."

"Then tell me."

"I love you Isabella Swan." The words came so naturally that it seemed that I had always been meant to say them to her. I placed a soft, chaste kiss on her lips before she settled her head back against my chest.

"Your heart is beating so fast." She commented.

"It always beats like that when you are around… When someone speaks your name… Or even when I think about you. It's my bodies reaction to you Bella…" I said softly, blushing at my confession but I noticed that all the while she had changed her position on my chest and was looking up at me and smiling.

"I'm glad I'm not the only one." She took one of my hands in her own, an act that almost seemed absured as my hand was so much larger than her own, and placed it against her own chest where I could feel the steady, rapid pounding of her own heart, beating almost in rhythm with my own.

"It appears we are not good for each other's health… That much heavy beating is sure to put strain on the heart." I commented playfully.

"Don't you dare try to talk your way out of this one Edward Cullen." She scolded me and I could see the flash of concern and hurt as it washed over the face.

"I'm only stating what is healthy…"

"Well I don't exercise enough… This will be good for my heart." She replied and I laughed. Only Bella would think of something so utterly absurd. "Are. You. Laughing. At. Me?" I couldn't contain myself and she slapped my chest hard with the back of her hand. "Stop laughing at me!"

"I'm sorry." I finally managed to choke out. "You're just so cute."

"Cute is for puppies and babies… I am not cute."

"I happen to love cute." I smiled, pulling her closer towards me as if to emphasize that fact. "And you, Isabella Swan, are cute."

"Do you have to work today?"

"No. But I wanted to check on Charlie anyways."

"When were you thinking of going?"

"If you would like me to drive you to the hospital Bella all you have to do is ask. I would be more than happy to go with you."

"Will you take me to the hospital Edward?"

"Of course. Let me know when you want to go and I would be more than willing to take you."

"You just want to get rid of me don't you?" She smiled. "You've been around me for far too long. I'm sure any mystery I might have had is now long gone."

"That's where you are wrong… There is still so much that I don't know about you. You are still very much a mystery."

"What do you want to know?"

"What do you do in San Francisco? What is your life like there?" There… There were the dreaded thirteen words. The ones that I wanted to avoid because I knew where they were going to lead but I still felt that I _needed_ to know. As much as it would pain me to learn that she missed her job, that she missed the city, I had to know what I was getting into when it came to her.

"I work as a curator at the San Francisco Museum of Modern Art… I guess I got into it because I always enjoyed art… Obviously, since I was an art history major at Stanford… But it was one of those things that fell into my lap. It gives me the time to still do the things on the side that I love… Like photography."

"You like taking photos?" I asked, that piquing my interest as it was something that I had never imagined about her.

"I do. Charlie bought me a camera for my eighteenth birthday and it was something that I just fell into… Seems to be a pattern in my life." She observed quietly, giving me more time to interrupt.

"I'd love to see some of your photos."

"Oh really… They aren't anything much."

"Nonsense. I want to see them."

She shrugged and I nodded for her to continue. "I just finished with an exhibit that we closed a few weeks ago… A Georgia O'Keeffe and Ansel Adams exhibit. They asked me to head it up and I had honestly never been more honored. They don't usually let those so young do things like that so you can imagine my surprise. I'm supposed to be working on a Salvador Dali exhibit that they are going to have but with everything with Charlie… My heart just isn't into it and they told me to take as much time off as I need."

"Do you miss it?"

"I don't know really… I thought I would. I thought it would be so hard to be away from there… Not just MoMA… But really, San Francisco in general… The thing is… The more time I spend here, the more I'm beginning to realize that my home isn't there…" She paused for a moment. "I think I fell in love with the idea of San Francisco… The idea of a new place and a new life… But I wasn't really living a new life there. I was running away from the old one."

"People do that all the time though. That doesn't mean San Francisco isn't your home."

"My home is here Edward…" She said so confidently that it took my breath away.

"But Emmett… Charlie… They always said you hated it here."

"There was never any reason for me to love this town before."

"And now you have a reason?"

"Yes… He's laying right here next to me." My mouth was agape with surprise. It wasn't that I doubted her feelings, but I never, under any circumstance, believed that she could feel that strongly about me. It would be wrong to say that I thought it was one-sided, because I _knew_ she cared… I just didn't know she cared _that_ much.

"I can't ask you to give up your job in San Francisco to move to a small town with no opportunities."

"You didn't ask me." She said softly, her hand reaching up to brush the hair off my forehead "I could always get a job in Seattle, MoMA knows about Charlie… It would be logical to move back up there and I'm sure I could get the recommendation to get a job at the Seattle Art Museum, or even the glass Museum in Tacoma… I know a lot about Chihuly… And besides… It's too early to be talking about these things anyways… I just want you to know… For future reference, that I have nothing tying me to San Francisco."

My heart soared at the prospect. Sure, Seattle was four hours away… Tacoma, three and a half but they were infinitely better than the fifteen hours it would take to get to California, by car at least. But still, words were easier spoken than they were to live up to. "But surely you have a life there… A life that you've started, with people who care about you."

She laughed shortly… It was almost curt. "I wouldn't exactly call what I was doing in California living… It was more of a, 'I'm going to do everything I can to just make it through a week' kind of life. When I say that I have nothing tying me there… I really mean that I have nothing tying me there. But really Edward… We will deal with that when the time comes."

She looked at me intently, and I wanted to believe the words that were coming from her lips but I was too afraid that she was merely saying them as a way to get herself to believe them. We do stupid things when we think we want to be with someone… I could never live with myself if she ever grew to regret those decisions.

"Now… Can we go to the hospital? I'd like to see how Charlie is doing. I haven't really been able to spend much time with him."

The guilt flooded me once again. I had been the cause of that occurrence. "I'm sorry. That's my fault. I never should have continued to keep pulling you away from him."

"You really have this brooding thing down pat don't you?" She mused as she sat up and pulled the hem of the shirt down. "I wasn't fighting you about taking me away now was I?" I shook my head. "So stop blaming yourself. I _wanted_ to go with you. I _chose_ to go with you. Got it?"

I nodded and stood up. "Do you need clothes to change into?"

"Yes please." She smiled up at me before I went to find Alice to see what she could do.

_A Little While Later…_

It seemed like the day was going to be rather pleasant, though the air was cold with a pre-winter chill. Alice couldn't find a jacket that would fit Bella so I had given her mine and, like every time I saw her in my clothing, I marveled at how good she looked in them. The hospital parking lot was fairly empty, though that might have had more to do with the noon hour, than anything else.

"Emmett must have come here earlier this morning." She spoke after scanning the parking lot for his car after we had both gotten out from my Volvo.

"Maybe." I shrugged and felt her hand slip into my own. "Is he going to be angry with me?"

"Who? Charlie?"

"No… Emmett."

"Why do you say that?"

"Carlisle told me that he wasn't too thrilled with our… Spending time together."

"It's really none of his business."

"Still… I don't want him to hate me."

"He doesn't hate you. He's just very protective over me… More so now than ever what with the whole Jake episode. Don't take it personally Edward… He'll come around. I know that he likes you as a person."

"How do you know that?" I asked. I could feel my own eyebrows lift with curiosity.

"He spoke fondly of you when he called me to tell me that Charlie was here to begin with… That you had ultimately convinced him to tell me what was going on."

"I did… Though I never expected _this_" I gestured with one finger between her and me, "to happen."

"I know." She replied, leaning into my shoulder. "He knows that too. Just give him some time. He will come around when he sees that you are so different than Jake."

I nodded and we walked the rest of the way to Charlie's room in silence. I was thankful that neither Lauren nor Jessica were around. They were the last two people that I would want to deal with right now. All I could think of was Charlie's reaction to the both of us walking into his room together. Had Emmett told him?

"Hi dad!" Bella smiled as we walked into the room and she dropped my hand before walking towards him and wrapping her arms around his neck softly. Still, though she might have missed it, I saw the look that crossed his face when his eyes landed on our joined hands.

"Hi Bells." He smiled at her before turning his attention to me. "Dr. Cullen."

"Hello Officer Swan." My heart was racing in my chest as I felt him look me over, his eyes critical of my every movement. I reached for his chart, an instant reaction trying to find comfort in anything that I could. "I wanted to see how you were feeling today."

"I'm feeling much better."

"You look it dad." Bella grinned and I looked at his chart. His vitals had improved, much to my astonishment. I was truly unsure that he was going to come out of it, though looking at the chart now, seeing the improvement on his face even in just a short twenty-four hours, I was almost ninety percent sure, that everything was going to be okay and that he might be discharged in about a week.

"Your chart looks very good Officer Swan. I'm pleased with the improvements."

"Your father said the same thing this morning."

"Ah… Carlisle stopped by." I said casually, trying to maintain my calm but I couldn't help but feel his eyes on me and I knew, almost certainly, that Emmett must have said something.

"Yes. He stopped by when Emmett was here this morning."

"Oh! Emmett!" Bella said loudly. "I need to call him. Do you mind?" She asked, turning to look at Charlie.

"Not at all. I wanted to have a word with Dr. Cullen privately anyways." He smiled at her and she leaned down to kiss his forehead.

"Okay. I'll be back in a little bit." She turned her back to him and began to walk to the door, smiling at me softly as she passed and shutting the door behind her leaving me alone in the room with Charlie. This was a situation that, though I had been in many times before, served to increase my anxiety, and I feared that he could see just how uncomfortable I was.

"So Edward… I'm assuming I can call you that." His voice was authoritative, reminding me somewhat of Emmett's on the night that I had spent at their house… The night of the Port Angeles incident. My only response was a nod of my head, unable to find the words that should have come easily. "Good… I figured we could drop the formalities with Bella gone. Emmett tells me that you have taken to our little Bella."

"I…"

Charlie cut me off before I even had the chance to continue. "I might not be the healthiest of men right now… But I sure still know how to be quiet and still. I heard everything you told me yesterday when you came in here." I gulped loudly… I had only been so vocal because I had believed him to be asleep. "I think we have to talk son…"

**A/N:**

**Whoa… And entire chapter all in Edwards point of view! I wasn't really expecting that at first but it seemed to work.**

**So this chapter is a little different than the others… I was tired of keeping Charlie sick so obviously he is going to get better… Which means the father role is changing slightly… Though Emmett is still going to be VERY protective of Bella… Maybe even more so than Charlie… I haven't figured out what I want his reaction to be yet… Corny as it may sound… I let the characters kind of do their own thing while I'm writing, though I do know what is ultimately going to happen. So I hope that you all liked this little section with Charlie and Edward… There will be more, obviously, in the next chapter. One thing: how many of you suspected Charlie heard Edward when he had made his declaration?**

**So… I apologize again for how long it's taken to write this… This is like the third draft because each time it felt like such crap… I'm halfway satisfied with this chapter though so I decided to post it. I am so excited to hear what you have to say about it. I'm toying with working from Charlie's perspective for the next chapter… Even if only for a brief amount of time.**

**Now… As always… THANK YOU all to my wonderful reviewers and all you who continue to add this story to your alerts/favorites. Without your input there wouldn't be a story!**

**Thanks to:  
BubbiGurl23  
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blubuttrfly10  
TwiWriter15  
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dwebb88  
NanMcD  
greenbuttonsx: I'm working on changing that… I hate to do it so much which is why I'm trying to stray from it again for a while… I just wanted to keep it true… But I do appreciate what you said. And I agree. It does get annoying! I hope this chapter makes up for it!  
Viper003  
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mailbox killer: Oh the Spanish Inquisition is about to commence…  
IslingtonAngel: True… Though snow did cut my work shifts short because they didn't want us driving which was GREAT… kind of… I'll miss the money but getting off at 7 instead of midnight… Wonderful I tell you. And I was pretty scared I wouldn't get out of SeaTac but thankfully I got out just before they shut the airport down again… That was a good surprise.  
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Unofficial Cullen: I'm glad you found this story! And I'm even more glad that you are enjoying it! I hope that you continue to let me know what you think!  
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**I hope you all had a great Christmas… I probably would have updated sooner had we not gotten a Wii… I hate to admit it but I've become rather addicted… Stupid Mario Kart… Haha. Anyways… I'll be working on the next chapter, though with New Years in five days and my 22****nd**** birthday in six things might be hectic. Plus I'll only be in CA for about a week more and I want to spend some time with friends before heading back to WA… Still I'll be working hard to get you another chapter. Especially as I've left on a bit of a cliff hanger.**


	25. Chapter 25

**Baby You Can Stop Running  
Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight**

Chapter Twenty Five

_**Charlie**_

I'm a man who takes pleasure in the simpler things in life; the quiet of the early morning when I find myself fishing on the Sol Duc river with Billy or Emmett by my side, the taste of a cold Rainer Ale after a long shift at work, the pride I feel in the Mariners, hell, even the Seahawks, when they win a game. It doesn't take much to make a content person. In fact, I revel in the quietness of my life. I prefer to be alone.

It might be one of the reasons why Renee left all those years ago. I should have known that she was better suited outside of Forks and I suppose it was my fault for thinking that I could convince her that life in a small town could be rewarding, or at least, something that she might want. I knew better… I knew that she was destined for other things and yet I selfishly tried to keep her tied to the town, I guess I thought, or rather hoped, that children would have cemented that. It was foolish, and it was a wrong choice on my part. Still, her leaving… It created a deep hole that never quite filled.

She took Bella, or rather, Bella opted to go with Renee while Emmett had decided to stay in Forks; he was almost finished with high school and his social circle and place on the varsity football and baseball team had been cemented. So when Bella moved back because Renee remarried to that minor league baseball player, I was thrilled. Having Renee back was never an option, and I guess I always assumed that Bella would forever be with her, so the fact that she was finally coming home to me, well… I guess you could say that it was enough to fill the ache that Renee and left in my heart. My child, the baby girl whom I had spent so much time away from, was coming home. Still, with Renee's past and my knowledge of how much Bella hated the rain and the cold, Forks was never really meant for her. I suppose it was also the reason why I never pressured Bella to come back. Her disgust for the town was easy to witness and it was always easier to accept her leaving if I put it in those terms, and not in the way that I always figured; I was hardly an active parent, what did Bella owe me?

I never wanted to let her down. Stanford had been a great opportunity for her; she was intelligent to a point that it sometimes scared me… But I was proud of her and though I know I never spoke the words often enough… I did, no I _do_, love my daughter. Probably more than she could ever imagine. So now that she was back, I was hoping that there would be some way to keep her here… Or at least, keep her in my life once again. Seeing her walk into my room that day was one of the happiest days of my life because up until that point, I was certain that I would never see her again.

"So… You might want to know what's going on in Bella's life." Emmett spoke only minutes after walking into the room.

I could almost feel my heart race in my chest. _That couldn't be good._ The last thing I wanted was something to drive her away and the only thing I could think of was Jacob. She had told me her story and though I had been heavily sedated at the time, I couldn't help but feel the anger rise to the surface. Now that I was more coherent, all I wanted to do was grab my rifle and give him a piece of my mind. Sure, Billy was my friend… My best friend at that… But what his son had done to my daughter was unforgiveable.

"What" I said cautiously. If Jacob ran Bella out of town again I _knew_ I would do something I would live to regret if I ever did make it out of here, but it would have all been worth it.

"Your doctor and her have hit it off." Emmett grumbled and I found my eyebrows furrowing.

"What do you mean?"

"I mean that they are getting serious."

"They've known each other for three? Maybe four days?"

"Rose won't let me interfere."

My thoughts instantly drifted to Edward's words, the words spoken because he thought I had not been awake. And, for some reason, I found that I trusted him. _"The one thing that I'm sure of Charlie, the one thing that I'm certain about, is that your daughter is the first person to make me feel like a human being. The first person to make me see something more in life, to make me want a future. I've spent so much time watching my life pass by that for the first time I want to be somewhere else than this hospital, I want to be out living life and I want to live my life with her."_ Though it was true I had no idea what the context of their relationship was at the time, I assumed it was no more than a friendship of sorts, though it was obvious he had intentions for something greater. I couldn't help but feel reassured by his tone. The words he spoke, he spoke with such conviction it was obvious he was telling the truth and I admired that. He had been through what seemed like hell and I was happy that Bella was seemingly providing him some comfort.

Still, I had reservations. He could, theoretically, hurt her just as much as Jacob had. She was finally coming back into our lives. The last thing I wanted was for someone to change all that. For a relationship to drive her away from us again and maybe driver her away for good the second time around.

"What does Rose say?"

"That he cares about her… That he's protective of her and that they make each other happy so I should mind my own business."

"Smart woman."

"How can you say that? After everything! She just came back and here she is… What if he hurts her and she leaves again?"

I fought back the chuckle that was easing its way to my lips. "Death makes you rethink things a little Em. I'll have a talk with him… I'll make sure he understands just what is at stake but tell me, is she happy?"

He groaned.

"I know you don't want to lose her again either. I know it hasn't been easy on you either, especially after everything that you were keeping from me… But maybe she needs this. Maybe he will be good for her."

"I should get to work."

"I'll see you this afternoon then." And he nodded before exiting the room.

I, on the other hand, leaned back against the bed and closed my eyes. There were more thoughts running through my mind then I had even considered possible. Emmett did have a point. Bella's record with men, or at least, her record involving Jacob seemed to show that when push came to shove, she would leave and that was something I wasn't willing to let happen again.

My moment of solitude didn't last long because Bella's voice brought me out of my thoughts.

"Hi dad!" I looked up and noticed that she had entered with Edward, and then my eyes drifted to their hands, clasped tightly, fingers laced. It was… intimate.

"Hi Bells." I smiled as she sat down on the bed and hugged my neck, the one place that didn't hurt, as the healing bullet wounds that had somehow become infected still hurt like hell. My eyes shifted to Edward, who looked uncomfortable to say the least. Even in the two weeks that I had come to know him; I had never seen him so, anxious. "Dr. Cullen."

"Hello Officer Swan." His hands reached for the chart and I continued to eye him as I watched his eyes scan the notes the nurses and other doctors had taken. "I wanted to see how you were feeling today."

"I'm feeling much better."

"You look it dad."

"Your chart looks very good Officer Swan. I'm pleased with the improvements."

"You father said the same thing this morning." Carlisle had checked in earlier, mentioning something along the lines of how a nurse had failed to comply with hospital regulations and how deeply sorry he was and how they were trying to rectify the situation as quickly as possible. I had, I'm sure, grunted a response, having been woken from the first deep sleep that I had since the shooting.

"Ah… Carlisle stopped by." He was attempting casual but I knew that my glare had caught him off guard. It had never been my intention to upset him… I guess I was just trying to convey to him that I wasn't going to take this lightly and he shouldn't either. When it came to Bella… My interests were going to be very clear.

"Yes. He stopped by when Emmett was here this morning."

"Oh! Emmett!!" Bella shouted, jumping off the bed. "I need to call him. Do you mind?" Her eyes met mine.

"Not at all. I wanted to have a word with Dr. Cullen privately anyways." I smiled before feeling her press a kiss against my forehead. I blushed. We had never really had much physical contact. Just as my affectionate words had been lacking, I also failed to show her physically… I had always been uncomfortable with hugs…

"Okay. I'll be back in a little bit."

The room was silent for a moment after the door had closed and I merely observed him for a minute, watching that he still gripped the chart in his hands as though he was hoping that it would serve as some kind of protection.

"So Edward… I'm assuming I can call you that." He merely nodded his head, which I took as a motion to continue. "Good… I figured we could drop the formalities with Bella gone. Emmett tells me that you have taken to our little Bella."

"I…" He stuttered and I realized that I had never seen him at loss for words before.

"I might not be the healthiest of men right now… But I sure still know how to be quiet and still. I heard everything you told me yesterday when you came in here. I think we have to talk son."

I observed Edward and watched as he placed the chart back down before taking a seat. He was quiet and I wasn't sure where to start. I didn't exactly want to scare him off; I just wanted to find a way to get into his head. The little insight that I had was not sufficient enough to find out just what his intentions were with Bella, nor were they enough to really understand the extent of their relationship.

"Officer Swan… I…" He began and I lifted my eyebrows at him, effectively ending this stuttered sentence.

"There are only a few things that I have to say. Hurt her, and I'll personally see to it that you go missing. I may only be the police chief of Forks, but I can assure you that I have more clout in this county, in this state, than you do." A look of shock crossed his face and I wondered if I had overstepped the line that I had planned to not cross. "Secondly…" I found my voice softening, "thank you."

"T-Thank you?"

"I haven't seen Bella smile like that in a very, very long time and I assume that you have something to do with that."

"I can tell you with complete honesty that I never intended for this to happen sir."

"I know."

"I would never hurt her."

"I know that too." I sighed and winced at the momentary pain that shot through my left side. "I'm just worried about what she's been through."

"I know… about Jacob Black." He said softly and I nodded.

"I figured as much… I probably should have known from the beginning. I knew that those last two months before she left for California something was wrong and that it had something to do with Jacob… She never went with me to La Push and he never came around the house… I guess I was in denial. I didn't want to believe there was a problem."

"I would say that he is a fool for letting her go, but I'm glad he did." He looked down to the floor as though he was studying the linoleum tiles. "I'm not glad for what he's done to her… I can imagine how hard it's been for you and Emmett and I understand your concerns about my sudden appearance in her life but I really do care very deeply for her… To the point where it scares me."

"Your parents? James? I'm assuming that to be part of the reason." His lip twitched slightly as he looked up, his eyes locking with my own and it was almost as though I could see the pain that lay behind the green eyes that had shone brightly when Bella had been around.

"You really did hear everything." He muttered. "I never thought I deserved to have anyone… And sure, the thought that I would lose someone again like I lost my parents has always been in the back of my mind but it's much more than that. I guess I could never forgive myself for what happened but Bella…" He paused as he searched for the words though I was fairly certain that I knew what he was going to say. "It's like she woke me up. She's this wonderful breath of fresh air and I can't imagine being without it anymore."

"Just promise me you won't hurt her. I couldn't bear to lose her again and I know Emmett feels the same way."

"I think if anyone hurts anyone… It's going to be her hurting me. But, I'll take what I can get." He smiled sadly as he looked towards the door, causing my gaze to shift there as well. Bella walked in a few seconds later, her face slightly contorted.

"Everything alright?"

"Will you tell Emmett to back off?" She asked, resuming her place back on the side of the bed.

"Back off?"

She groaned. "Never mind."

"Bella, I think I'm going to head home." Edward stated and I watched her expression fall slightly.

"So soon?"

"Carlisle will murder me if he finds out that I'm here."

"Oh."

"It was good talking to you Officer Swan."

"Just remember what I told you Edward." I replied as he nodded. I tried to ignore the stubborn glare that Bella had cast my way, she had obviously caught on to my father speech.

"I'll call you later Bella."

"Bye." She whispered as he retreated through the now open door before looking back at me, a fire blazing in her eyes. "What did you say to him?"

"What every good father would tell their daughters boyfriend."

"Not you too."

"Bella… I'm not looking at this like your brother. I know about Edward's past."

"How?"

"He told me when he thought I was sleeping yesterday."

Her arms folded across her chest. "So apparently I'm the last to know everything."

"It's not like that. First off, he thought I was asleep when he was telling me." I grinned and watched her face as she absorbed what I was telling her. "I think he was looking for some kind of confirmation… That it was okay… I think that even he knew you wouldn't go running from him, maybe he didn't want to believe it, but I think he _knew_. Of course his parents are always going to support him but I am the father of the woman that he loves… Without my consent, he knows he might as well give up."

"It wouldn't change anything… whether you liked him or not."

"Would it?"

"No. He and I would be a package deal… You'd have to accept it."

"You've certainly never outgrown your stubbornness. You are your mother's daughter." She grinned for the first time since he had left.

"The thing is, I owe that man my life. But that in and of itself wouldn't be enough for me to give my full hearted consent. But for now, I can tell you that I do like him. I'm not saying that won't change because if he hurts you, I will hunt him down with my own rifle… But I can see how your smile reaches your eyes for the first time in years… Or at least, what I assume is the first time in years."

Bella looked down, her eyes unwilling to meet my own and I reached over and touched her cheek and noticed that tears were streaming down them.

"What's wrong?" I was never good with tears; probably another reason Renee left, and why Bella hadn't wanted to tell me about Jake. I winced at the thought, though maybe now would be a good chance to start over with her, to show her that even though I never said it enough, that I love her and that I would and will, always be there for her. "Why are you crying?"

_**Bella**_

I couldn't stop the tears at Charlie's confession. The phone conversation with Emmett had already struck a nerve with me because I hadn't been expecting his reaction. After he had witnessed how badly Jake had broken me, how depressed I had been, part of me had truly been hoping that he would embrace this new relationship with Edward. I hadn't been expecting his harsh words.

"_Did you sleep with him last night?"His voice was terse and I found that I cringed away from the phone momentarily, wincing with the implication in his question._

"_I did… But only in the truest sense of the word, not that it concerns you any."_

"_That's where you're wrong Bella. This __**does**__ concern me. This concerns dad too. Do you honestly think that you were the only one affected what Jake did? God Bell I hope you're not that naïve! Fuck Bella… I realize that it sounds selfish on our part but he hurt us too. He took you away from us. And how do we know that the same thing isn't going to happen with Edward?"_

"_He's different." I said softly. I did understand where he was coming from, truly I did, but how could he not see that they were two different people?_

"_You don't know that! You've only known him for a few days!"_

"_I know it's hard to understand but I do know him Emmett and I know you do too! Do you honestly think he is capable of it?"_

"_Yea, well I thought I knew Jacob too." _

"Why are you crying?" Charlie's concerned voice cut through the thoughts of Emmett's words and pulled me back into reality. Only then did I feel the hot, wet tears that were streaking down my face.

"I'm scared…"

"Of what Bella?"

"The fact that I've never felt this strongly for anyone before and it's only been a few days. I don't think he'll hurt me… No… I _know_ he won't hurt me but the intensity of my feelings… I didn't know this was possible."

"I wouldn't worry too much about that… Take your time with it… I'm sure he'll wait. I _know_ he'll wait. Bella… I know Emmett is concerned and I understand where he is coming from but he'll come around too. He's afraid of losing you again, we both are. I just don't see Edward doing to you what Jake did. And… Like I told him, if he does, I have a rifle and clout with the state of Washington… No one would ever have to know."

I was choking on my tears as I laughed at Charlie's threat. I knew it was nothing more than that and I assumed that Edward did too, but mainly, I guess having Charlie's support was what I needed. I knew that I had hurt Emmett by running away, but I knew that I had hurt Charlie even more. Still, he was the one encouraging me to take a chance, and, though I had never been close with him in the sense that most girls are with their fathers, his faith in the situation did make me feel even just a little bit better about it. No, I didn't know how it would turn out, if one, or both of us would end up hurting each other, or if we would end up happy, but I did know that if I didn't take the chance, that I would regret it for the rest of my life.

_**Edward**_

I had Charlie's approval, now all I needed was Emmett's and I was certain that his would not be as easy to attain. Talking to Emmett would require preparation and thought. I knew that I would have to find a way to put into words just how truly happy Bella made me feel. It wouldn't be easy but I knew that for my sake, I would have to find a way.

"Edward a letter came in the mail for you!" Esme shouted from the kitchen as I walked into the house, the smell of cookies overwhelming my senses.

"That smells good." I commented as I picked up the letter from the marble countertop watching as she bent down to check the batch that was cooking in the oven.

"I thought Bella might like some." She said before turning to face me, her face falling as she saw I had come alone. "Where did she go?"

"She's at the hospital with Charlie." I replied and Esme nodded.

I looked away from her and down at the letter that was in my hands. The postmark was from a Chicago post office. I no longer knew anyone who lived there and my heart was racing at the thought. It could have been merely a letter from one of my parent's friends who sometimes tried to check in on me, though I never responded, but the lack of a return address was what had caught my attention and made me believe that it wasn't going to be a letter that would bear good news.

I, however, pushed the thoughts aside. There was no point working myself into an anxiety attack over something as meaningless as a letter. My finger tugged at the white envelope and I pulled out the paper and let my eyes read over the scrawl. My heart plummeted into my stomach and I tossed it down on the counter after finishing it before running to the toilet to throw up.

"Edward… Are you alright." Esme's voice was far away… My mind had too many things to process.

"No… No… No…" I muttered over and over again, still kneeling on the cold floor, unable to look up into the concerned eyes of the woman who had spend the past seventeen years raising me. I should have known that this would happen. I should have never let myself get involved…

**A/N:**

**So… I know it's not the best… But there were some important things: For Edward, he had been searching for some kind of confirmation from someone that he wasn't a monster… And though Bella had expelled that feeling from him, the thought never fully leaves which is why it's important that Charlie does accept him. And he does… Emmett however, is worried about the situation as well as he should be: Charlie never saw Bella as broken as she was… He had heard about it second hand but there is a difference in witnessing and hearing. So I hope that you are okay with that…**

**Now… I wasn't GOING to bring in the drama so soon but I think the story was starting to slow down… But obviously something is happening to Edward and though it might not be addressed in the next chapter… It's going to get addressed soon. I just thought that things were becoming too perfect between them and it's about time to shake it up a bit.**

**As always thank you to all my wonderful readers! Thank you to the C2 group Main Couples Only! For adding this story! And thank you to those who continue to add this to your alerts/favorites! I hope you are still enjoying! The best way to let me know is to review!**

**Thank you to my WONDERFUL reviewers!  
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**I am overwhelmed but in a good way! I hope that you enjoyed this chapter… And as I said, the best way to let me know is to tell me. I adore reviews! They make my day and since today IS my 22****nd**** birthday and I'm feeling a little old… Haha… Reviews would definitely brighten my day!**

**I hope you all had a wonderful New Year!**


	26. Chapter 26

**Baby You Can Stop Running  
Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight**

**Chapter Twenty Six**

_**Bella**_

The next three weeks passed in the blink of an eye and before I even had time to realize it, October was finished and November had commenced. I was certain that my life had never been more hectic; Charlie had been released from the hospital a week after his conversation with Edward and I spent the majority of the two weeks after that at home making sure Charlie was comfortable and well taken care of. Those were the speculations of his return: he could come home so long as there was someone around to care for him and that responsibility fell upon me. Not that I minded. In fact, after I had spoken to him about everything that had happened with Jacob and my budding relationship with Edward, Charlie had been so understanding and he seemed to almost be a different man than the one that I had left in Forks when I ran off to California. Maybe that man was there all along, maybe it was a result of the shooting, I wasn't sure, but I wasn't going to complain. I was enjoying every day that was passing, getting to know the new Charlie, the Charlie that I felt I could talk to, the Charlie that I felt listened to me, the Charlie who I knew loved me.

It wasn't until two weeks had passed that I realized that the museum was still an obligation in my life, that although I was no longer in California, my job still was and there were other people in this world who depended upon me being responsible. Though they had gladly given me time to come back to Washington, I remembered that since I had been here, I hadn't bothered to call them to update them on what was happening. Though I was uncertain as to where my future with Edward was going to lead, I knew that the last thing I wanted was to lose my job completely; it would be one thing if I quit voluntarily, being fired was a completely different thing. The words 'I'm sorry' had probably never been uttered so many times in one single sentence as I told both Gary and Janet what had happened and how, in the chaos of everything, I had failed to remember to check in. More than ever I realized that I had truly been blessed to have such understanding superiors because they just said that they would put me on a leave of absence and when I was ready to return that my job would be waiting.

Staying however did bring other things to the surface. The fact that each time I had to go to Forks Outfitters for groceries, or if I ever wanted to go to Fork's Coffee Shop for a cappuccino or a late, I ran the chance of possibly running into Jacob who, because the need for a mechanic wasn't as demanded on the reservation, owned the only mechanic shop in town. Thankfully those three weeks passed without a problem but I also knew that it was only a matter of time. The thing was, I had no idea what I would say to him if I did see him, it wasn't as though the last time we talked had gone _that_ well; I had only allowed myself to talk and somewhere down the line, I knew that I would have to give him time to say his peace as well. I just didn't want to deal with that, and, if I was being honest with myself, I didn't really care what he had to say, still, I knew that he should have his chance, at some point.

The other thing of which that I would have to deal with was that I found myself in town for Angela's wedding shower, and I'd probably be around for her bachelorette party as well (though I was dreading that idea just as much as I was dreading this party). And I knew that the attention would not be on Angela, but rather on the events that had unfolded over the past few weeks; those being Jessica's forced resignation from the hospital, and my relationship with Edward. An involuntary chill ran down my spine as I thought about it. I didn't want the attention and I didn't know how to talk about what was happening with Edward because even _I_ didn't know what was happening with Edward. Our relationship had taken a turn after that day with Charlie; he seemed to have mood swings that sent my head spinning and I didn't know how I could explain that to anyone.

"Dad I need to go out for a few hours do you have everything that you need?" I asked as I managed to run down the stairs without tripping. Charlie was lounging on the couch, his eyes glued to the big screen TV where he was watching a game between the Seahawks and the 49ers. Surprisingly enough, the 49ers were in the lead, something that even I never would have guessed though as I glanced at the TV I saw that they were only five minutes into the second quarter and the lead was only by seven points.

"What?" He asked as he watched Matt Hasselbeck through the ball to John Carlson for a touchdown. The game was obviously more important and I held back the chuckle that was threatening to escape my lips at Charlie's short attention span for anything other than sport and his job.

"I said that I have to head to Angela's party for a few hours and if you have everything you need."

"Oh." He said and looked around at what was resting by him.

"I can always have Rose drop by and check up on you." I continued, "Or, I mean… I don't _have_ to go." I put as much emphasis on that part as I could. Angela would understand if I couldn't go because I needed to be around for Charlie. It was the only excuse that I could use but at the same time, if Charlie didn't want me around, I couldn't lie to her and tell her he did. She knew my tells and knew when I was lying.

"No no… I'm good." He smiled and I nodded.

"Alright, I'll be back in a few hours. I don't want to be gone for too long."

"Go have fun Bella. I'm fine."

I grumbled and grabbed my purse before leaving the house, slinging it rather ungracefully over my shoulder. I wanted Charlie to tell me not to leave, to not go, not only because I didn't want to go to the shower, but also because I knew that the fact that he could care for himself alone for a few hours was merely a sign that he was getting stronger and would no longer need me to care for him as I had been. The thought terrified me, not because I didn't want Charlie better, because I did, but rather, because I knew that my life was going to change again when he was, that there would be decisions I would have to make that I knew would shape the course of the rest of my life, or at least, shape my relationship with Edward.

_Stupid wedding shower… Stupid people of Forks… Stupid, stupid… _Though I knew I didn't want to go, I knew I had to. Angela was truly one of my best friends and I felt that I owed this to her. Even though we had been in the same town for three weeks now, I still hadn't been around much to see or talk to her and she had called me the night before begging me to come, telling me it wouldn't be the same without me. How could I deny her? It was the least I could do for someone who had always been there for me when I needed her to be. I felt enormously guilty as it was for leaving her behind when I ran off, though I knew she would understand if she ever did know the whole story. I just felt that I had let her down as a friend and here was my opportunity to make it up to her, to behave like the friend I should have been rather than the one that I hadn't been.

I could have thought of a million things I would have rather been doing then going: breaking a leg (for the third time), changing a hundred dirty diapers, hell, I was even to the point where I would rather face Jacob again than go to the shower where I knew I would have to see not only Lauren but also Jessica. Angela was too good of a person to not invite them and I was mentally bracing myself for the wrath of Jessica who still blamed me for her most recent short break up with Mike, who, not surprisingly, had actually tried to ask me out a few days after it had happened.

"_Bella!" I heard his voice and immediately knew who it was. He was the only man whose voice could illicit the undeniable chill of terror down my back. It wasn't that Mike was a bad guy, in fact, he was as harmless as a golden retriever, it was just he was so… so… I'm not even sure I could find the words to explain it really. His endless perusal annoyed me and there had been a time in high school that I thought maybe if I told him yes, only once mind you, that we would go out and I could tell him that I only wanted to be friends with him. I thought better of it, it wouldn't matter, he would still continue to pester me._

"_Hi Mike." I said, trying to keep my voice normal and not scowl at the fact that he was interrupting my Edward time. It didn't matter though because my eyes fell onto Edward before I looked to Mike and I saw that he was glaring enough for the both of us and I had to hold back the chuckle at his jealousy._

"_Hi Bella!" He smiled and I smiled back in the friendliest way possible without giving him hope. "I uh…" He ran his fingers through his hair in his anxiety, an act that I had seen Edward do countless amounts of times and immediately felt turned on, but when Mike did it, it was fairly comical. "I was uh wondering if you might want to go out tonight, or tomorrow… Or well. Whenever."_

_He was nervous and I knew that Edward's glares were not helping matters any, but really, what made him believe that it was okay to ask someone out when they were obviously with another man. Unless of course he didn't think Edward and I could be together, which wasn't exactly a thought I hadn't had before, heck, it was something I thought about countless amounts of times. _

"_She's actually busy tonight… and tomorrow and well… forever." Edward barked, pulling me from my contemplation._

"_I wasn't asking you Cullen." Mike retorted, his body language obviously on the defense as he crossed his arms against his chest and narrowed his eyes as though he was challenging him._

_Edward however got the upper hand when he reached forward and took my hand into his own and brought it to his lips, kissing each knuckle as he looked at Mike through the corner of his eye. My cheeks had turned a bright shade of red at this obvious competition for my affections._

"_It doesn't matter if you were asking me or not… I know what her plans are because her plans are my plans and they don't involve you."_

_Mike leaned down, placing his palms on the table, his face a few inches from mine. "Call me Bella…" He smirked and retreated through the glass doors._

"_Can you go anywhere without attracting male attention?" Edward mused as he shook his head._

"_I'm not sure what you're talking about."_

"_You are so oblivious Bella." He replied as I pulled my eyebrows together my nonverbal way of stating my confusion. "Every time I'm out with you there is some other man vying for your attention… I don't like it… I don't like Mike either."_

"_You are crazy… There are not thousands of men vying for my attention."_

"_Obviously you need your sight checked."_

"_Besides, Mike is harmless."_

"_He doesn't look harmless. He looks like he wants to tear your clothes off."_

_That sent me into a fit of giggles though Edward didn't seem too impressed by it._

_Once I had calmed he cocked his eyebrow at me. "You're kind of cute when you're jealous you know… Besides, I wouldn't be talking about attracting attention mister. You should see all the girls who lust after you."_

"_That, love, doesn't mean anything… I don't see anyone but you."_

"_Well the feelings mutual."_

"_You you won't be calling Mr. Newton then?"_

"_Never." I grinned and he leaned across the table to kiss me softly._

Though that exchange had happened almost two and a half weeks ago, I knew Jessica would still be angry about it. Word had circulated around town be the end of the night and even Angela had called to ask about it. But going to this shower also meant I would be without something that I so desperately wanted. Edward. I just wanted to see Edward who I felt had almost become a ghost over the past few weeks. When he wasn't at the hospital and when he had time to drop by, it was almost as though he had been so distant that he wasn't really there. I was growing frustrated with him and beginning to wonder if we had moved too quickly in the beginning and he was finally seeing how mismatched we were for each other. I still couldn't figure out what he wanted with me, surely he was finally starting to get that, to understand that we didn't belong together.

Thankfully, I didn't have the time to contemplate that thought for very long because my vendetta against gravity took control and I managed to trip while walking down the steps on the front porch. Instinctively I threw my hands out in front of me and squeezed my eyes shut, bracing for the inevitable meeting I would soon have with the ground, but it never happened. Instead I found myself hitting something that was both hard and soft at the same time while a pair of strong arms quickly wrapped around my waist and I heard a soft, musical chuckle.

"What are you doing here?" I asked, looking up at him with confused eyes. Recently, he had taken to calling me to let me know if he was going to stop by and I had only checked my phone a few minutes ago and there had been no message from him. I found that I was both surprised and annoyed that he was there. Surprised because I craved his presence and had not been expecting it, and I was annoyed because I knew that I couldn't stay with him for very long if I was going to make it to that damn party.

"I came by to see you." He responded as I felt his fingers brush against my forehead, pushing a few strands of hair out of my eyes. Knowing that if I continued to rest in his arms I would never go anywhere, I wiggled away from his embrace and crossed my arms over my chest as I watched him eye me intently. I was, for the first time, thankful for my choice of an outfit; Alice had, only a week ago, forced me to buy a skirt for the event when I told her about it and though it wasn't exactly something I would have picked for myself but I couldn't deny that it looked good. So she made me purchase it: a tight black pencil skirt that, although it hit my knees, had a slit that went to the middle of my thigh (my one complaint). Her persuasion didn't end there though because I also managed to walk out of the store in the other articles of clothing that I wore: a white empire waist shirt that dipped low down my chest and exposed more skin then I was use to and also, thankfully, the dark blue sweater I had convinced her to let me get as well to alleviate my discomfort with showing so much skin.

"I was just on my way out." I replied after a long lull in the conversation and I smirked at how his eyes had widened when he allowed his gaze to travel over my body.

"I can see that…" He looked like he was struggling with some internal battle for a moment before his eyes met my own. "Where exactly are you going?"

I shrugged. "Oh you know… On a date."

"Very funny." He replied with a mock chuckle though his eyes had darkened like they usually did when jealousy flashed through him.

"Angela's wedding shower."

"Where is it at?"

"Lake Crescent Lodge." I replied and he nodded.

"Can I drive you?"

"And how am I going to get back?"

"I'll stay there until you're ready to go home. I can sit in the lounge and have a drink or something."

"By yourself?"

"I don't mind… Besides, at least then I can be proactive in my attempts to deter young, hormonal waiters from pursuing you." He grinned his crooked, dazzling grin and I felt my knees weaken.

He leaned closer, his lips against my ear and his warm breath tickling my neck and soft, pleasurable chills ran down my spine and I imagined that my hair was standing straight up on the back of my neck, "You are too tempting to be left alone. I don't trust men to be sane around you, hell, I can barely trust myself right now"

Internally I cursed Angela for this stupid wedding shower. Right now, I could only feel my desire for him and he knew it. He knew exactly what he was doing to me and that stupid grin on his face only showed me that he was enjoying it and that, above all else, made me even angrier with the situation. His moods had been like this for the past three weeks, happy and enjoyable one minute and cooler and distant another. I wanted to savor the warm, content Edward before the cool one reappeared and now I was going to be stuck in a wedding shower, uncertain as to what mood would be awaiting me when it was over.

"Stop doing that! It's hardly fair." I chided.

"What?" He smiled and took my hand in his practically pulling me towards his car.

"You know what."

"I assure you Isabella, I have no idea what you are talking about." His green eyes sparkled as he opened the door and I was doing all I could to keep my knees strong.

"Stop dazzling me into submission." I glared and he chuckled, leaning down to place a kiss against my forehead before closing the door. I would have no choice as to whether or not I wanted him to come with me, though I knew the answer well. I wanted him to come and nothing would change that.

We arrived at the lodge thirty minutes later and though I had brief memories of what it had looked like from going there a few times when I was younger, I was still taken back by the beauty of it. It looked more like a large, lake side mansion than it did an actual hotel, but the glimmering blue waters of the lake that it rest by made it look almost like it was something out of a book. Angela had mentioned that the wedding was going to be held there as well and I understood that, it was perfect for them in the natural beauty.

Edward took my hand as we walked to the front door and I barely had time to kiss him chastely on the lips before Angela grabbed my hand and pulled me away. I glanced over at him my eyes pleading with him to take me away from there but he merely chuckled and shook his head before walking into the bar to order a drink, probably a single malt scotch.

"You have to tell me _everything_ about that man Bella." Angela grinned and I rolled my eyes. This was what I was dreading.

"Is Jessica here?" I asked timidly, stopping Angela in her tracks before we entered the room where everything had been set up. She nodded and I groaned. "I take it she has been spreading word about what an evil person I am."

"Oh don't worry… If she says much of anything I'll just tell her that she knows where the door is and she is more than welcome to leave."

"You would never say that."

"True… But I can still make her feel uncomfortable… You know she has been trying to sink her claws into Edward since he moved here… Well… Her and Lauren." She grinned and I knew that grin. It was the calculating, plot forming one that she often used when expressing her plans to get under Jessica and Lauren's skin.

_**Edward**_

That letter changed everything for me. Though Carlisle, Esme and Alice tried to assure me that everything was going to be okay, I couldn't help but worry that it wouldn't be. I had no other life experiences to tell me otherwise. Everything that revolved around James was seemingly designed to punish me and this, I knew, would be nothing different. Still, though they had pushed me to tell Bella about it, I didn't want to alarm her just quite yet. I wanted to be absolutely certain that danger was imminent and right now, I wasn't certain about that. Besides, she had enough to deal with and this would only add more to the weight she was carrying.

Though I longed to spend time around her, I also was afraid to continue to allow myself to get attached. It was helpful that Carlisle had my ban from the hospital lifted, so I once again, found myself immersed in my work. I would make the effort, if you could call it an effort because I fed on her voice, to call her when I had small breaks; I longed to hear her speak my name and calling her was usually the highlight of my work day. I made a strict rule for myself that I would see her no more than four times a week, which, because of my work schedule, was something I could pull off, but even though I set the rule, I still found myself looking for her on my self induced banned days, not that she ever saw me. I was basically becoming a glorified stalker, and it sickened me, but I just wanted to be sure that she was safe; it was the only way I could sleep with relative peace at night.

I sat in the bar with my scotch in one hand while I looked around. The bartender was trying to get my attention but I didn't want to deal with her. She was mildly attractive, though, had my mind not been clouded by Bella, I probably would have considered her to be attractive, but her constant questions were beginning to wear me thin. I had thought that as a bartender she would have been able to pick up the fact that I didn't want to be bothered, that I wanted to be left alone with my drink and my thoughts. Mainly because there were so many of them swimming around my mind and I didn't know how I wanted to deal with them.

I was thankful that Emmett was finally starting to warm up to me. Though I knew he wanted to talk to me, Bella always seemed to stop any conversation from happening; something that both thrilled and annoyed me. I knew that somewhere down the road I would have to tell him what my intentions were with her and she was merely delaying the inevitable. The last thing I wanted him to think was that I was scared of him. I wanted him to think of me as an equal and someone that would be worthy of his sister, even if I wasn't sure I was. Still, I couldn't help but be excited about the fact that he would talk to me pleasantly, something that he hadn't been able to do that first week.

Emmett was much more perceptive than I had originally given him credit for. And there were a few occasions when Bella had left the room and left us alone that he had begun to question why I hadn't been around quite as often as I was in the beginning. I wondered if he had been able to sense my growing concern that another letter was on the way declaring the fact that they knew about Bella and how happy she made me and that they were going to do something to change all that. And true, I didn't know it was at all connected with James or James' family, but there wouldn't be anyone else in the world out there who would have that kind of vendetta against me. Still, I kept mum on the topic and merely told him that work had kept me busy. He didn't think to question it.

I grabbed my drink to get away from the bartender and began to walk about the place. I had never been to this particular location and I figured that since I had some time, that I should check it out. It was large and beautiful and it seemed like the perfect place to maybe take Bella out to dinner some night. I could only imagine how romantic the scene would look with a full moon reflecting over the lake. My thoughts wandered to Bella and I imagined her beside me in a short blue dress, sipping from a wine glass and her eyes looking at me like she often did; lit with that beautiful sparkle that made me overjoyed to know I had put it there. I imagined leaning over the table to kiss her every so often and the smug looks that I could shoot at the other men in the establishment who would look on with envy.

"I don't know who you think you are to just march back into town and take over!" The loud nasally voice that I immediately recognized as Jessica's broke through my day dream and I walked closer to the commotion of twenty or so girls bickering.

"I don't know what you are talking about Jessica." My angel's voice spoke calmly though I could imagine that she was anything but.

"Because of you I don't have a job!" I clenched my hand into a fist as I listened to the exchange. There were multiple reasons for my anger. The strongest being that she were accusing my father and myself of merely firing her because of Bella's insistence. That couldn't have been farther from the truth because in reality, Bella had begged me not to have her fired but I assured her that had it been any other patient the same actions would have been taken. My second reason for my anger was because this party was supposed to be about Angela. I didn't know her well, and almost everything that I did know about her came from Bella's lips, but everything that I knew was good and the fact that Jessica was doing this on a day that was meant to be about Angela, aggravated me as well. Some people didn't know went to just leave things be; social tact was obviously not something that Jessica possessed.

"I didn't fire you Jessica."

"No you got Edward and his father to fire me!"

"Maybe if you had followed hospital procedures that wouldn't have happened Jess." I looked around the corner and saw Angela piping in. "Besides, you're just jealous that Bella landed Edward before you did." I held back the chuckle that was urging its way out at Angela's candid behavior and the stunned look on Jessica's face.

"Well I landed Edward before Bella did."

"Lauren stop lying." Angela continued. I found my heart race at what Lauren might have to say.

"I'm not." My eyes darted to Bella who looked at her with an expression that I had never seen from her before. Jealousy? Anger? Hurt? I wasn't quite sure. "Edward and I were together a few days before Bella showed up."

"One date doesn't account for landing someone Lauren and you know it."

"I'd say what happened after the date did."

"You slept with him?" Bella was trying to blink away the tears that knew were threatening to spill and I had had enough of what was happening in there and walked into the room.

"Lauren." I said, my voice thick with venom. "I think you should tell the truth."

Her jaw dropped and I walked over to Bella and kneeled down in front of her, taking one hand into my own and lifted her chin up with the other so that she was looking straight into my eyes.

"I did not sleep with Lauren. I would never, ever do that Bella." She nodded but I could see the apprehension in her eyes. "I did take her to dinner before I met you but I realized while we were out that there was no attraction at all but she didn't understand that. When I dropped her off she tried to kiss me and I told her that I only wanted to be friends with her." I looked away to glare at Lauren who was still sitting there, presumably in shock because she didn't know that I had been the one to take Bella to this party to begin with. My attention was back on Bella in the blink of an eye. "I promise you that nothing at all happened. You believe me right?" She didn't speak, but instead merely nodded and I moved closer to her and kissed her softly.

"Angela I'm so sorry that _some_ people in this room do not have the social tact to understand that there are certain things that are not to be discussed at a party." I started as I pulled myself off my knees and to my feet before turning my attention to Jessica. "As for your termination from the hospital… Bella had nothing to do with that decision at all, in fact, she begged me to tell Carlisle to over look it. _You_ went against protocols and you knew exactly what you were doing when you failed to make that phone call; you did it based solely on your personal feelings for her. Your firing was nothing more than what you should have expected and I suggest that you apologize for your accusations against Bella."

"I'm… I'm sorry." She stuttered and I turned to see that Bella's cheeks were a bright red.

"It's okay." Bella responded softly.

"I'm sorry for intruding Angela… Please carry on. I just couldn't sit there and listen to these girls berate Bella for something that she had no part in."

"Oh don't worry about it Edward. You are welcome to stay here if you like so you aren't off by yourself."

"No no… This is your party. I'll just be in the lounge." I smiled before leaning down and kissing Bella's head lightly. She would probably be furious with me for intervening but it just wasn't in my nature to allow the woman I love to be scolded for something that she had no part in.

_**Bella**_

I stayed behind to help Angela gather her things and I couldn't help but smile a slight smug smile when I watched Jessica and Lauren dart out of the room when the party had come to an end. I knew that it was because after what Edward had said to them, they both had retreated inwardly with embarrassment and though I didn't enjoy being the center of attention, I was thankful for his coming to my rescue. For the most part, it really just showed me what kind of man that he was.

"Well that was an interesting party." Angela smiled as she gathered up some of her gifts and began to place them in a neat pile to the side.

"I'll say."

"I don't think I've ever seen a man do something like that. God knows I love Ben but I don't think he would ever have the balls to stand up to Lauren and Jessica."

"I wouldn't say that."

"You obviously don't know Ben like I do." She laughed. "So… What _is_ going on with Dr. Dreamy out there?"

I didn't know how to answer her question so I shrugged.

"What do you mean you don't know Bella?" She asked, her hands on her hips as she looked at me. "What is going on with you guys?"

"Well… I mean we haven't had that official talk or anything but I guess we are dating."

"Do you like him?"

"I think that's pretty obvious." I retorted and watched as she smiled.

"I like him too Bella. Actually… If Ben wasn't around I'd probably be trying to wiggle my way into those pants!"

"I don't think I've ever heard you say something to vulgar Angela!"

"What can I say…? He brings that out of me." I threw a wadded up piece of wrapping paper at her as we both laughed.

"How was the rest of the party?" I heard his voice break though our laughter and I smiled even wider as I turned to look at him.

"It was great Edward." Angela replied getting back to work and collecting more of the gifts.

"I know I wasn't invited to this party or anything but I wanted to get something for both you and Ben so I hope you don't mind." He made his way over to them and handed her a large package that was beautifully wrapped.

"Oh you didn't have to do that!"

"I wanted to." He smiled and held his hand out towards me, beckoning me over and I couldn't resist. My feet carried me to him and before I knew it, his arm was wrapped around my waist and he pulled me into his side.

"Wow Edward, I never knew you were such a good wrapper! I don't think I've seen a present wrapped so nicely from a man before." I teased and he pinched my side, effectively tickling me.

"Ah… The joys of living with your mother," He said as he buried his nose in my hair. "Esme wrapped it."

Angela delicately tore the paper from the box revealing a rather expensive Kitchen Aid mixer to which her eyes widened.

"You really didn't have to do this Edward!"

"Seriously Angela, I wanted to do that for you." He smiled and I felt my heart flutter at what a wonderful man I had somehow managed to find. "Any friend of Bella's must be worth it."

"Well thank you. I love it and I'm sure Ben will too!" She grinned. "Well I have everything taken care of here so why don't you both head off."

"Are you sure?"

"Positive."

"How are you going to get all this stuff to your car?" I asked, wrapping my arm around Edwards waist, bringing my nose against the front of his shirt so I could catch his smell.

"Ah… I've got some of the waiters to help." She replied. "Really. Go! I'll call you later."

I nodded and pulled away from Edward, taking his hand into mind. "Bye Angela. I had a great time."

"Haha… What was the highlight? Being yelled at by Jessica or Lauren?"

"Probably when my knight came in and saved me." I grinned as I looked up at him and his eyes met my own.

"Yeah, that was probably my favorite part too." She replied wistfully. "Take care of our girl Edward!" She shouted as we began to walk out.

"I'll do my best." He called back, his arm once again around my waist as we walked out.

**A/N:**

**Wow… Long chapter. So… There have been some conclusions again with this chapter. We know see that things with Emmett and Edward ARE improving… Always a good thing. And we know that Bella and Charlie's relationship is improving and we know that Jessica was fired from the hospital for not calling when Charlie had his heart attack in the hospital. **

**Now… Please don't kill me for making Edward a little more distant. The next chapter will discuss in more detail the letter that came. I think it's safe to say that we know that it is about James… But what I'm not going to say is who it was that sent the letter… Might be Victoria… It might not be… Only time will tell because I do have some ideas brewing in my mind. **

**As I always like to do, thank you to everyone who is sticking with this story and reading it for the first time (it's a lot to take on because it's gotten rather long!) and for those who continue to add this to their alerts and their favorites! You all are amazing! **

**I'd also like to thank my reviewers!  
MyraidProBold  
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SavageWoman: Haha Yes I suppose I shouldn't be complaining about my age… I'm glad that you found the story though! And very true… Bella and Edward never have the break to be happy…  
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**What it comes down to is, you all don't have to review but the fact that you do makes me so happy! You have no idea how happy I am when I see review alerts in my inbox! Seriously, I smile every single time! **

**On another note… I do have another Bella/Edward story going on… It's going to be short, a few chapters at most so if you're interested check it out, it's called Isn't It Romantic… It's kinda like the movie Sabrina and I've love to know what you think so please check it out!**

**If I don't get to post again by Friday, have a WONDERFUL weekend! I'm getting on a plane to head back to WA and once I'm there I'll be pretty bored since my friends won't return for another week so I'll hopefully have some time to get some writing done!**


	27. Chapter 27

**Baby You Can Stop Running  
Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight… This song was kind of inspired by the song Hazy by Rosi Golan feat. William Fitzsimmons (if you are a fan of the singer/songwriter thing with acoustic guitars… I think you would enjoy both artists, but Rosi's CD is amazing).**

**Chapter Twenty Seven**

_**Edward**_

Work was kicking my ass. Or rather, I was letting work kick my ass. I couldn't remember a time when I had been this busy at the small community hospital, but that probably had more to do with my taking on more patients in order to keep myself from thinking about the changes that were occurring in my life. It was easier that way and though I would like to say that it hurt less that would be a blatant lie.

It had been six weeks since Bella had come to Forks and Charlie had finally made a full recovery and she would no longer need to stick around. As Charlie's doctor, I should have been thrilled that he had pulled through, and I had a sneaky suspicion that much of that had to do with the fact that Bella had returned to help him. It was obvious to everyone that his whole outlook on the situation had changed dramatically since she had arrived. He wanted to pull through for her, so that they could repair the relationship that had been strained for the past five years. I couldn't exactly blame him, she was worth it. But looking at the situation as someone in love with Bella, I was slightly disappointed that it hadn't taken Charlie longer to recuperate. Though I was certain of her feelings for me there were still so many things that had been left open and we hadn't discussed the future since that morning almost six weeks ago but I was certain that we would be having that conversation within the next few days and I had only had two options, and either way, the answer would break my heart. I could have her stay and risk her safety under the suspicions that whoever was sending these letters would find her and go after her too, or tell her to leave. The decision would be painful regardless of what path I took. I would have thought that after the curve balls that life had thrown me that there would be some hope for happiness but with no easy option for either of us, the possibility of a happy ending was almost as tangible as air.

It was all too much to think about, to deal with and I just wanted an escape from it all, though even that was hard to find. I had hoped that I could seek comfort in Bella and though I did feel some semblance of comfort when I was able to hold her in my arms knowing absolutely certain that she was safe, the thoughts were never far off the horizon.

I sighed loudly as I shut the front door behind me when I got home from work. I had anticipated going straight to Bella's but after having been thrown up on by a young child who had come in with the flu I figured a shower would take priority. Sure, I could have used the showers at the hospital but I suppose I'm too 'prude' as Alice would call it. I just didn't enjoy the gaping that some of the female nurses and doctors would give me when I walked out with the towel hung low on my hips.

The distinct smell of pot roast hit my nose and I curiously walked into the kitchen to see Esme perched over the stove preparing something else. I did all I could to hide my disappointment that she had chosen today of all days to make pot roast. It had always been one of my weaknesses and with my plans to see Bella, I would miss out on it.

"Hey." I said softly, watching as she jumped with surprise. "Sorry, I thought you had heard the door when I came in."

As she turned to face me, I could tell that something was wrong. It was true that Esme was a fairly composed person but her one tell was her eyes. When something was troubling her, you could always see it in her eyes. It was probably one of the reasons that most people assumed that we were all blood related; I knew that my tell was much like hers.

"It's okay, I was just lost in thought." She responded before nodding to the marble countertop where the white envelope sat untouched.

I wanted to yell, to scream, to cry and cruse whomever it was that was continuing to haunt me. For once in my life all I wanted to do was move forward and it just seemed fitting that when I had finally come to accept my actions in the past and attempt to move on, that it would come barreling towards me at an unbelievable pace.

She must have seen the terror in my eyes because without speaking, she was by my side and her arms were wrapped around me and pulling me into a motherly hug that was filled with the love that I had never before been able to accept but was drinking in for the first time in a long while. I could feel the tears welling behind my closed eyes and I was afraid of opening them and letting them escape. I didn't have the time to be weak, I _had_ to be strong.

A dry sob escaped my mouth and she continued to rub circles on my back with her hand.

"It's okay Edward. We are all here for you."

I just stood there for what was probably ten minutes as I wrestled with myself for control over my emotions while Esme just held me. As a man, I probably could have pulled away, but I couldn't bring myself to do that. I needed her to hold me because somehow I was reverting to my ten year old self, afraid that I was going to lose everything and everyone who had ever meant anything to me in my life once again and that thought scared me more than anything else in the world. I had come out of it once, but I wasn't sure I would be able to come out of it again. Wrapped up in my own thoughts, I had failed to take notice that Alice and Jasper had walked through the front door and were bearing witness to my emotional breakdown.

"Did another letter come?" She finally spoke as I wiped the back of my hands over my eyes to wipe away the remnants of the tears that had managed to escape regardless of how hard I had fought against it.

"Yes."

"What did it say?" She asked and I shrugged.

"I haven't opened it yet. I'm not sure I really want to… It's not like they really change or anything." I replied and grabbed the white envelope from the counter into my hand before collapsing onto one of the breakfast bar stools.

"You need to see if anything has changed."

"You're the one who can predict the future Alice! You tell me what it says!" I snapped and she recoiled into Jaspers arms. I instantly regretted my tone, but it was becoming harder and harder to remain calm. "I'm sorry Alice… You didn't deserve that."

"It's okay…" She whispered and I knew she was right… I had to read the letter. I had to know if anything had changed because I had to know what was happening. It was the only way that I could make plans for the future.

I turned the envelope over in my hands a few times, my eyes looking at the all too familiar scrawl before I tore at the sides and pulled he paper out. I wasn't sure my heart could beat any faster than it was as my eyes scanned over the writing.

_Just because our first attempt was unsuccessful, doesn't mean we won't be back… We send our regards to the officer, he was never our target. He just got in the way of our plans. Just so you know._

I looked up and my eyes met Alice's.

"What's wrong?"

"I never really thought about it…" I said to no one in particular.

"Thought about what?" For the first time Jasper spoke up as he moved closer and took the letter from my hand before holding it up to look at it. "Oh man…"

"It's my fault."

"What's your fault?" Alice and Esme both asked at the same time.

"Edward… Listen to me." Jasper started, not bothering to answer the question that had only been asked. "This is not your fault. You had nothing to do with this at all. They are trying to get a rise out of you. They want you to believe that it is your fault. You did not have a gun in your hand… You did not shoot Bella's father…"

"If I had never moved here…"

"Edward Anthony you listen to me and you listen to me good!" Esme shouted, realizing exactly what the letter had stated from Jasper's talk. "None of this is your fault and you need to accept that. I will not have you moping around this house blaming yourself again for something you didn't have control over. Do you understand me?"

I nodded because even if I didn't want to accept it, I knew she was right. There was absolutely nothing that I could do to change the course of what had happened and Jasper was right, I hadn't been the one to pull the trigger. Still, they knew I was here and it was only a matter of time before they found out about Bella and it was obvious that they had no problem harming an innocent bystander… They would have no problem harming Bella if it meant that they would get to me and that realization scared me more than anything else in my life.

"I know you don't want to tell her Edward… But you really should tell Bella what is happening." Alice said softly.

"There isn't anything to tell her Alice." I lied.

"Come on Edward… That's a big lie and you know that."

"She will never be able to forgive me for this." I said softly, my eyes on the hard counter top unwilling to look in the eyes of my family. "She is going to hate me."

"She isn't going to hate you…"

"How can you say that?"

"Because she loves you… Everyone can see it." Alice continued.

"But because of me her father almost died."

"What did I tell you about this not being your fault?" Esme said again and I looked at her.

I shook my head. I knew what she wanted to hear but I wasn't able to say those words, even if they were the truth. I couldn't bring myself to accept them because if I had never moved here, then it never would have happened.

"I'm going to take a shower… I just don't want to think about this right now." I said as I stood up and retreated into my room to take a shower, wishing with all my might that the water would just wash away everything and make it all go away.

* * *

"Hey." I said somberly as I walked into the Swan's living room to find Bella lying on the couch with a Kleenex in her hand, wiping at her eyes. Panic filled me for a moment as it was a rare sight to see tears in her eyes and with everything that had been going on in my life, I couldn't help but worry that something had happened to her. "Are you okay?"

"Hi…" She whimpered. "I'm fine… Just the movie."

"What are you watching?" I asked, walking around to the other side of the couch as I watched her sit up so I could sit next to her. I had her in my arms in a matter of seconds, her body melting into mine as she relaxed.

"Romeo and Juliet."

I chuckled, thankful for the distraction.

"Don't laugh."

"It's sweet." I replied kissing the top of her head.

"How has your day been?" She asked and I briefly wondered if Alice had told her from the curious look in her eyes.

"It's been long... It's been a long, tiring day." She smiled and straddled my lap as she pressed her lips against my neck and I fought back the groan that always seemed to come forth when she was there, tempting me, trying to push me beyond my limits. Still, I continued to fight, not ready to move the relationship to that level yet, not until I was certain what our future would bring.

"And are you tired now Dr. Cullen."

"Bella…" I warned, my voice as stern as I could muster as I pushed her away slightly. My resolve was weakened however when I saw her lips mold into that damn irresistible pout that she now knew was an infallible approach to get her way. "Don't give me that."

"What"

"That pout. You're playing dirty."

"Do you want me to play dirty?"

"Bella." I groaned and brought her closer into me, trying hard to remove the temptation though I could still feel her soft lips against my neck. The heat that they exuded against my still wind chilled neck sent a shiver of pleasure down my spine and I felt my eyes roll to the back of my head for a few moments.

"Edward?"

"Hmm?"

"We need to talk."

I had an urge to kick and scream like a child. The day had been long and with the letter that had come, all I really wanted to do was bask in Bella's warmth, in her body, to savor the time that we had together. But it seemed that reality had a completely different plan.

"I suppose we do." I said after a lull and I felt her fingers brush a few strands of hair off my forehead.

"I'm going back to San Francisco." I should have been expecting it, but as soon as the words escaped her lips, I felt my heart plummet at the thought that she would be leaving me.

Even though I knew that when this conversation was going to take place I was going to push for her to go back, I suppose I never really thought about how I would actually feel when she would go. For the first time I was certain I was experiencing heart break in a way I never thought existed; it felt as though my heart had been ripped from my chest and stomped on, and I wasn't sure that anything would ever make it feel better. She was sitting there, in my arms and yet my heart ached as it did when we were apart, only this time, one hundred times worse. My mouth was dry as I opened it to speak and I felt it took hours to finally choke out the words. "When?"

"Monday."

"So soon?" I whispered, closing my eyes wishing that it was all a dream.

"It's almost the end of the month… I have to go."

"I understand." I replied as she pressed her forehead against my own.

"What's going on in your mind?" She whispered, her warm breath against my face.

"I just…" I started but I wasn't sure where to go from there. I knew this was coming… I just wasn't prepared for how this would feel when it actually did happen. "I guess I didn't think it would hurt this bad… And I can't ask you to stay because you have a life back there… But I'm going to miss you."

"You can come with me."

"Bella… You know I can't." I opened my eyes to find that I was staring directly into her chocolate brown ones wishing that I could just swim away in them.

"I didn't think you would be this upset about my leaving." She said, pulling her forehead from my own and turning her head to look out the window.

"How could you say that?"

"You've just…" She paused and I reached forward to cup her chin with my hand, forcing her to look at me. "Well… I feel that you're back to that hot and cold behavior and I didn't know…"

"Bella… Never doubt my feelings for you." I said sternly. "I've been going through a lot and I'm sorry. I shouldn't have ever taken any of it out on you. I'm so sorry that I made you think that I didn't want to be with you because you are all that I ever think about, all that I want in this world."

"So come with me…"

"I can't leave work Bella."

"Yes… You can." She smiled and I found myself confused.

"How do you figure?"

"I'm only going to be gone for a week."

"A week?"

"Yes a week."

"But I thought you were going back to San Francisco."

"Yes… To pack up my apartment so my sub-letter can move in and to bring my things back up here."

"I don't want you to move here because of me Bella." She started to laugh which only added to my confusion. "What?"

"You're awfully conceited Edward."

"What do you mean?"

"You think I'm only moving because of you?"

"Aren't you?"

"There are other people in my life besides you Edward… Things with Charlie are finally looking up and I guess after everything that's happened I don't want to lose any more time with him. I owe him so much and I want to be in his life and that means moving closer to home. I mean… It's not that you aren't part of that picture, you're just a wonderful bonus to it all."

I was still on the fence about everything. Her life in San Francisco was what she seemed to need if she ever wanted to advance her career. The museum had a wonderful reputation and it would only be a matter of a few years before she was able to get any job that she wanted. It's not that I'm saying that the Seattle Art Museum isn't good, or that the glass museum in Tacoma isn't a good place for her either. It's just… I know what it's like to strive for success and taking a job here would only seem to be a step backwards for her. "But what about your job?"

"I'm moving to Seattle and for the time being I'm going to work at the Seattle Art Museum and maybe go back to school."

"Where are you going to live?"

"Alice and Jasper offered to let me stay with them for a while until I find a place of my own." She said before moving off my lap and onto the cushion beside my own. I wasn't sure how to react. I would be lying if I said that I didn't want her to stay but with everything that was happening, it just seemed better if she went to San Francisco for a while. At least until everything blew over and I was certain that nothing was going to harm her. At least if she was there, they couldn't find out about us.

We were silent for a while before she took the initiative and spoke once again. "Please Edward… Come with me."

"Okay…" I said, a smile on my lips. Maybe getting away was something that we needed, something that I needed. If anything, it would help me to forget, if even for a little while, the past that was catching up to me and to spend time with the only woman who had ever made me feel this good, even when the world I knew was crashing down at my feet.

**A/N:**

**Okay… So I know it's a really short chapter and it's because I had a really hard time with it and I'm still not really happy with it. I am looking forward to the next one though because it will take place in San Francisco and there is going to be some confrontation… I hope that the chapter was decent to read… Like I said I'm not all that proud of it but I wanted to give some answers about the letter and what was going on.**

**I want to address something: Someone mentioned that this didn't seem believable… That someone would come after Edward for acting within the law… What I wanted to do was lay down what I was doing with this. I have never said that Victoria and James were together… That was something that was assumed. What I did say however was that James was a part of a radical group… So this chapter was meant to clarify things just a little bit. The letter was saying that this group is coming back for revenge because they fully believe in what they have done. Not to mention, we have only heard good things about Edward's family… What if his mother was involved with shady political dealings?! It's not that hard to believe really. So anyways… I hope that this makes a little bit more sense.**

**I'm hoping to wrap this story up soon because I'm itching to start the next one. So much so that the ideas are flowing for it and I've been outlining it… I would like to find a beta for it however because I want to get some feedback… Actually I'd like a beta to talk out the rest of this as well so if you are interested let me know in a PM or a review!**

**Now… I would like to thank everyone who is continuing to read and support this story! **

**Thank you to:  
liz  
ty101  
Kasai13  
liz  
Chaolinchao  
Patrick Cullen: I am so appreciative of your comment. Seriously… I'm thrilled that you like this story.  
flower123  
liz  
bloodredeclipse  
Pretzels  
laceyndom  
dwebb88  
Inu-ru831  
bluebella.x  
iheartquestionmark95  
Sparkle  
BubbiGurl23  
greenbuttonsx  
SWChica2005  
CBC1  
Luvntwilight  
ILoveAnime89  
TwiWriter15  
MyraidProBold  
FRK921  
guardgirl414  
aliceandra  
Flying with Fairies  
NanMcCullen  
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mailbox killer  
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lorit  
cullenEyeser  
x-aly-x**

**I promise the next chapter will be worth this really really crap one!!**


	28. Chapter 28

**This chapter was once again inspired by a Rosi Golan song: Come Around. And the song will play a role in this chapter as well…  
It's an absolutely beautiful song and I'm not sure if it's the lyrics or the piano or what… I just know that it's one of those songs that each time I hear it I get the chills. But it inspired the work that went into writing this chapter. **

**Baby You Can Stop Running  
Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight. Though I would love to go to some of these places with my own Edward… **

**Chapter Twenty Eight**

_**Bella**_

Nothing had changed. Each and every picture was still in its frame on the mantle of the fireplace, the one of Emmett and I right after I graduated from high school, a picture I had snapped of Charlie as he lounged on the couch one spring afternoon while watching the Mariners on TV, even one that I had taken with Angela and Ben shortly before I left for California, before the baby bump was detectable. My eyes shifted to my book shelves where each book still rested in their alphabetical order; and I couldn't help but notice that even the magazines were still sitting on the coffee table, untouched, only a few of them with upturned corners from having been looked at. It was almost as though time had ceased to pass in the apartment and I would have believed that had it not been for the pile of mail that was stacked on the kitchen table, the tell tale sign that Sonia was making sure that my mailbox was not going to burst. I thought about thumbing through it, I was certain there were bills I hadn't paid, a few magazines that were now at least two months old, but I couldn't be bothered because I was too tired. It wasn't that the two hour flight was that trying, it was more the fact that I felt emotionally stripped.

"This place suits you Bella." Edward's voice broke the silence that had elapsed since we had walked into the apartment building in the Pacific Heights borough of San Francisco. The apartment had definitely surpassed my budget, but Emmett made me promise that I would live in safe neighborhood, and it didn't get much safer than Pacific Heights. "I can't believe you're giving this up."

I dropped my hand from my luggage while my eyes continued to scan the dark room before I walked to the large bay window with the best view that I had been able to find. It was just after seven and darkness had fallen over the city but it was that time of the day that I found San Francisco to be the most beautiful; when the city was dark and lit only from the lights of the street and windows of the large skyscrapers. I would miss it, but I knew that there would always be the opportunity to come back if I had to. "I'm not exactly."

"What do you mean?"

"I actually own this place and I'm not going to sell it. I have someone who wants to rent it for a while… At least until I know where I plan on settling down."

"You own this place?" He sounded surprised as he walked to the light switch and turned it on, illuminating the room so he could see it better. There would be a lot to pack up, though I had promised to have the apartment furnished, I did still need to find a way to pack all the other trivial things around, like my books and pictures and some of the art work that I had collected over the years. Still, I was hoping that we could get it done in a just a few days instead of the entire week that I had allotted. There were places I wanted to take Edward… Things I wanted to do here with him by my side.

"Yea… A few years ago I had a job at a gallery and I became fast friends with the owner who convinced me to let him show my work." I shrugged. "I never really expected to get that much for them. It wasn't as though I had a trained eye and the gallery is so prestigious, I mean, he sells stuff by Ansel Adams and Horace Bristol if people have enough money to pay for it. But he took a chance on me and it went so much better than I had imagined."

"I never knew."

"I never told you… Besides, I don't sell my work under my real name."

"Why's that?"

"I guess because if people don't like them then the criticism doesn't hurt quite as much. I can pretend that it wasn't me." I shrugged glancing out the window again.

"You always seem to surprise me Isabella Swan." He smiled before walking closer towards me and taking my hand into his own. I had never been a fan of my full name, but when it came from his lips my stomach always did flips. He sat down and pulled me into his lap and I sighed as I felt his lips against my jaw. "And I'm sure your work is amazing and don't even think about denying it. I can't wait to see something of yours."

We didn't talk after that, instead we just sat there in the comfortable silence that had managed to pass between us and I was content to hear his heart beat through his shirt. It was soothing and everything I needed and even if it was only for a short while, all the stress that I had been feeling seemed to melt away. I had never considered Forks my home, and at the same time, I wasn't sure I ever considered San Francisco my home either, but as I sat there with his arms wrapped tightly around me, I realized that home wasn't the place, it was truly where your heart lay and I knew that it wouldn't matter where I was so long as I was with him. He had captured my heart fully and completely and I was certain that he was home.

"Are you hungry?" I finally asked before nuzzling my nose against his shirt savoring the scent that filled my nostrils when I heard his stomach rumble with the telltale signs of hunger. We hadn't had anything to eat since we had gotten to the Seattle airport, and I'm not sure a glass of wine and a few olive nibbles could really be considered eating anything.

"I could stand to eat. Did you want to go out?"

"I was thinking take out. But if you want to go out we can go out."

"Honestly?" His voice a mix between a question and a statement and I turned my head up to look at him. I would have thought, after all the time that we had spent together, that I would have gotten over the intense wave of lust that always flooded my body when his eyes met mine, but even after two and a half months, each time I saw the green of his eyes, my body went weak.

"I always want you to be honest." I smiled as he leaned down and nestled his head against my neck. His warm breath against my bare neck sent a wave of pleasure through my back and I did all I could to stop the moan from escaping. Two and a half months and we had still done nothing more than some heavy petting. I knew he was only doing it because he was trying to be respectful, but I had never wanted anyone more than I wanted him and I felt myself growing slightly impatient.

"I would rather be here alone with you." He whispered. "I have something for you too, an apology of sorts for my behavior the past few weeks."

I groaned. "I don't like surprises Edward."

"I swear I didn't spend a dime." He replied before pulling away and standing up, bringing me up with him. He kept his arms wrapped around my waist, pulling my body close to his and I sighed into him, resting my head against the hard muscle of his chest. "What do you want to order?"

I had a few take out menus stashed away in one of the messy drawers in the kitchen and told him to get whatever. I wasn't in the mood to be all that picky and though I would have liked to have said I was hungry, I wasn't and I attributed that to the stress. After he had ordered I showed him around the apartment and we put our bags in the bedroom. He had offered to sleep in the spare but I told him no because the truth of the matter was, I slept better when he was next to me and I was thrilled to have a week alone with him to just be comfortable and safe in his arms. We wouldn't have to worry about Emmett or Charlie or Rose or Alice. It would just be us, together and I intended to take full advantage of that.

"The bed smells like you still." I heard him say while I changed into sweat pants in the bathroom. I would have changed in front of him but I didn't want to push my luck just yet. Though I had every intention of trying to seduce him on this little trip, I wanted to wait a few days, until he was comfortable and he could tell that I was ready for that step. I assumed that the reason that he hadn't pushed the sex issue with me was because of everything that I had been through with Jacob and I was thrilled that he respected that, but I was beginning to get impatient because I felt that my body was calling towards him and I often found that I was left wanting more. I was finally ready to do more and I needed to find a way to tell him that and I figured that this trip would provide just that opportunity.

I walked to the door of the bathroom and leaned against the frame watching as he pressed his nose into the pillow. I couldn't help but smile. "You know, the real thing is standing right here and you're opting for a pillow?"

"You're right… The real thing is so much better." He smiled widely as he tossed the pillow to the side. "Warmer and softer… Plus if I kiss the real, it doesn't look weird _and_ it kisses back."

I laughed as I approached the bed and sat down tangling my fingers in his hair as he closed his eyes before moving his head into my lap. This was a side of Edward that I didn't know existed, or rather, I knew existed but I figured he would never let him show. He seemed at peace, relaxed and comfortable. The usual lines in his brow were smoothed out and it wasn't because I had to with my hand. He was light and free and I wondered how long this version of Edward would last.

"What did you order?" I asked before leaning down and pressing a kiss to his forehead.

"Chinese."

"From Eliza's?" I asked, suddenly hungry.

Edward shrugged, "Was that the only option to choose from?" I nodded enthusiastically. "Then I suppose so." I was peppering kissing along his jaw at his choice in food. Though I had not really cared earlier, I was thrilled that out of everything that he could have chosen, he had chosen my favorite without knowing. "Hmm… I would have had it flown in if I knew you would react this happily."

"Did you get the crab rangoons?"

"You are so lucky that we have the same taste in food, love." He smiled as the buzzer sounded, alerting us that the food had arrived. I started to get up but he put his hand on my leg, pushing down with some firmness so to keep me planted in my spot. "I'll get it."

"Baby… Um… How do you buzz someone in?" I heard him call and I smiled and ran from the bedroom to the door and pressed the button listening to him mutter under his breath. "I did that."

"I have the magic touch." I grinned as he leaned down to place a chaste kiss to my lips.

"You sure do. Now, go back in there and I'll be back with the food in a few minutes." I pouted and he just shook his head. "It's not going to work, I'm paying… Deal with it. Besides, I don't want some hormone crazed delivery boy lusting after you."

"Jealous?"

"Extremely." He smiled before leaning down and kissing me one last time. "Bedroom. Now. Go."

I complied with his request, mainly because there were so few things that he ever wanted from me and though I hated that he often took it upon himself to pay, I knew that I wasn't going to get anywhere by fighting with him. Not to mention that I was becoming more and more blissed out as the hours passed because I was drinking in Edward's improved demeanor.

"I didn't get dishes…" He said as he walked back into the room his arms holding two brown paper bags. I closed my eyes and smelled the delicious scent that was radiating from them and felt my mouth begin to water.

"I don't think we need them." I replied cheerfully as he began to take the food from the bags while I reached for the remote and turned the TV on, settling on some movie that one of those cable networks like USA or TNT were showing before leaning back against the pillows and grabbing one of the chopstick sets and one of the cartons that was sitting before me.

I studied his face while we ate. It was something that I did quite often when I thought he wasn't paying attention and I had been certain that I had memorized every line and curve of it, but I couldn't help but notice that something was different about him here and I wasn't sure what it was exactly. His strong, chiseled jaw seemed more relaxed, as though he wasn't clenching his teeth as he so often did back in Washington. His cheeks were relaxed, which made his almost hard face seem soft and more welcoming, much less menacing and scary. His brow, usually riddled with lines from tension, was smooth and I wanted to reach out and touch it, but he caught my staring before I could bring my hands up.

"Is everything okay?" The lines had returned and I reached forward and smoothed them out, feeling his head press harder against my hand as he leaned into it.

"Everything is wonderful." I replied, putting my chopsticks down before falling back against the pillows and closing my eyes. I could feel his eyes still on me and I opened one eye to catch his gaze. "You're different here." I commented and he pulled his eyebrows into that all too familiar quizzical v shape. "Good different… Relaxed… Contented."

"I think it's just being away for a few days… I'm not worried about anything back at home. I just want to enjoy the time that I am being given to be alone with you for a little while. Everything is always more... complicated back in Forks."

"It doesn't have to be."

"Bella…" He started, putting one of the Chinese takeout containers down before turning to face me. There was a look there that I had never seen before and I wasn't sure how to read it. His eyes had momentarily darkened, but it wasn't the lust filled look that I was use to. This one was different, one that seemed to remind me of the earlier days of our acquaintance, before he had confessed his history, his past with me and I began to worry if there was something that he wasn't telling me, something that he didn't want me to know.

"Yes Edward?"

"Never mind." The look was gone almost as soon as it had appeared and he turned back towards the food that was still scattered on top of the duvet. "I'm going to put this stuff away and then I want you to listen to something."

I nodded and closed my eyes, melting into the pillow that I hadn't realized I missed quite this much. My pillow in Forks wasn't quite as soft and plush as this one and I wondered for a moment how I had gone so long without it. I could hear Edward in the kitchen and I assumed that it was because of him that the pillow hadn't mattered, because it was the only logical explanation for anything. Most of the time I spent the night in Edward's arms and I used his hard chest as my pillow which was always better than a soft pillow to begin with. His chest allowed me to fall asleep to the steady beating of his heart. I had a hard time sleeping without it now days.

"Do you have an iPod dock here with speakers?" He asked, startling me from my thoughts as I turned to see him standing at the foot of the bed, his black MP3 player in his hand. I nodded and pointed to the bedside table and he walked over there and placed it in the holding.

"Okay… I wish I could say that I wrote these lyrics and the music for that matter but I didn't. I was talking to Alice a few weeks ago in her room and she was listening to music and this song was playing and I found it and decided to record it for you." He started. His eyes met mine for a moment while I nodded for him to continue. "Please don't laugh at my voice. I've never claimed to be a good singer… I just wanted to say some things to you and this song was the best way to do it because it's everything I've been feeling since I've met you."

He turned away and I noticed the slight blush in his cheeks, something that I had never seen before and I smiled at the fact that he was nervous, happy to know that it wasn't always just me. He pressed a button and I heard the piano and I smiled knowing that it was him playing. A few seconds later, his beautiful voice filled the small bedroom and I was doing all I could to keep my eyes from shedding the tears that were forming as I listened to the beautiful words of the song he said explained his feelings.

_So high tonight and I don't feel like coming down  
I can lie to you all my days, but you're the one, you're the one_

_And I'm a fool for waiting so long to let you know_

_Come around, come around, come around, come around to me  
There's something in between you and I, come around, come around to me  
You feel like breathing, Come around, come around, come around, come around to me_

_Like sunlight, won't you come and lay a ray down? You're the one  
I could run, I could run for the life of me  
But where would that get me? Where would that lead?_

_And I'm a fool for waiting so long_

_Come around, come around, come around, come around to me  
There's something in between you and I, come around, come around to me  
You feel like breathing, Come around , come around, come around, come around to me_

_Can't you see? You're my life line_

_Come around, come around, come around, come around to me  
There's something in between you and I, come around, come around to me  
You feel like breathing, Come around, come around, come around, come around to me_

Tears were spilling from my eyes as the piano ended. I was afraid that he was going to get the wrong impression but I was certain that I had never bore witness to anything more romantic in my life. Here he was, a man that I was desperately in love with, confessing his love in song. I knew he cared, I knew he loved me, hearing these lyrics, hearing everything, knowing the effort that he went through to record it with his own music and his own voice to give it that personal touch… It was magical.

A hopeless romantic, I had dreamed of something like this, had imagined it time and time again in my head but as the years passed, and after everything with Jacob… I just never thought that a happy ending was something I would ever have in life. I never believed that I would find someone that I could love this much, or someone who would love _me_ this much.

"Please don't cry." He whispered as he moved closer his arms encircling my waist and pulling me closer to him while he leaned down and began to kiss at the tears as they fell down my cheeks.

"I'm sorry… Maybe it was too much. I just thought that… I don't know what I thought. I know I haven't been very warm lately and I was afraid that it made you question my feelings but you have to know Bella… You must know that I don't want anything more than I want you."

"It wasn't too much." I said softly, breathing through the tears. "It was beautiful Edward… I can't believe you did that for me."

"You deserve so much more than that Bella." He replied, his voice soft as he looked at me with such intensity that it nearly took my breath away.

It was silent between us, the only other noise coming from the next song on his playlist, one that happened to be a song created from only a piano. I didn't want to move, afraid that if I did it would break the connection that had instantly formed between us, it was intense, and filled with something that had always been lacking before. There was passion and lust and a desperate sexual desire that circled in his green eyes and I was wondering if I could get away with pushing him to accept that, to give into it and to submit to his deepest desires.

He broke the trance first. "This song… The one that's playing now… It's the second part of my surprise."

He was silent once again and I looked down at the duvet cover, angry with myself for a moment for not acting on my impulse when it had begun but I turned my attention to the song. It only took a few moments but I realized that it was the same song that I had caught him playing on the first night that I had spent at the Cullen's home after that encounter with Jacob at the bar.

"This song was written for you…" He whispered.

"But I had only just met you that day." I was flabbergasted and I was sure that he saw it in my eyes.

He reached forward, his hand brushing a few strands of hair out of my eyes. "I know."

"How?"

"This is all so terribly clichéd Bella… But it's like I told you before… I have this indescribable pull towards you Bella… I think… I think I loved you the moment you collapsed into my arms in the hospital." He smiled. "I don't usually say things like this, especially where _you_ are concerned, but I had never been more thankful that they wax those linoleum floors."

I reached towards him and tangled some of his silky hair between my fingers. "I'm glad you caught me."

"I love you."

"I love you." I replied as he moved his lips closer to mine.

In an instant he had captured my bottom lip between his lips and I closed my eyes, pressing my body closer to his, realizing that this was it, this was the moment that was going to define us and I had never been more prepared. Unlike the first time, when I had done this with Jacob, I felt completely at ease. I knew that whatever came of this, if I was to become pregnant or not, I would always have Edward and I wouldn't have to worry about him running away from anything. We had each other, and I had never been more willing, more ready, to show him just how much I cared. This was what making love should have felt like the first time. I was home.

* * *

"You realize that it's going to cost a fortune to send all these books to Washington right?" Edward called from the living room.

"Let's take a break…" I said walking from the bedroom and into the room where he was, my eyes on his backside as he leaned down to pick up one full box of books. "Those better be in order mister."

He started laughing. "You went through the instructions ten times love… I'm sure I did it right. I'm a doctor remember, I have to be somewhat intelligent."

"If you are expecting me to stroke your ego you are sorely mistaken." I grinned watching him as he moved the box to the middle of the room where the other boxes were sitting, ready to be shipped to Forks.

After setting down the box he walked over, that mischievous glint in his eye that I had grown to love over the past two days. Needless to say, after the first night we had not move from the bed for two days and I had enjoyed every moment of time that we had spent in that bed and I had an inkling that he had too.

"You can always stoke something else." He wiggled his eyebrows and I slapped his arm playfully.

"I thought I'd never live to see the day of a sex crazed Edward."

"I didn't think I would either." He smiled as he wrapped his arms around me, pulling my body up against his before he dipped down and pressed his lips against my neck in an open mouthed kiss.

"Mmm."

"You said something about taking a break?" He said as he pulled away and I nodded. "Bedroom?"

"No."

"Couch?"

"Edward!" I said loudly and he just laughed.

"Hey… A guy can dream."

"Haven't you had enough?"

"Enough!" He bellowed while shaking his head. "I don't think I could ever have enough of you. That would be like telling Cookie Monster that he has had enough cookies."

I was laughing and he blushed at what he had said. "Really Edward… Did you really bring Sesame Street into this conversation?"

"Hey… It was the only thing I could think of in such a short amount of time… Besides, I liked Cookie Monster when I was young." He muttered, hanging his head slightly as I continued to laugh.

"I'm sure you did."

"What's that suppose to mean?"

"Nothing."

"No, really… What do you mean?"

"I don't mean anything."

"Yea well… Who was your favorite?"

"Sesame street character?" I asked and he nodded. "Elmo."

"So typical. Everyone loves Elmo."

"Sorry to disappoint."

"So… As you had been saying… You wanted to take a break?" He asked and I nodded. "What do you want to do?"

"Well… It's getting close to sunset and I want to show you something… A place that I like to go sometimes… Grab a coat, it's going to be windy and a little cold." I smiled, standing on my toes to kiss his nose before pulling away to grab my own coat as well as my camera before standing at the door to wait for him.

It wasn't too long of a drive and when we got there, it was worth it to see the look on his face as the sun began to set on San Francisco which only added to the splendor of the Golden Gate Bridge. This had been a place that I had often come when I needed to clear my mind and though it was a common area, usually surrounded by tourists, I always felt that it was my place.

"What is this place?"

"Battery Spencer." I said, pushing the hair that was whipping around my face off my shoulder before reaching down to pull my camera from the bag.

"It's amazing." He said softly, his arm gripping my side tighter as he looked out towards the water.

I pulled away and walked a little ways, my eyes trained on him, studying his form and his posture and I couldn't help but notice the happiness that appeared on his face. Like the intense calm that I had witnessed when we had first arrived, this was the first time that I had actually seen such a look of pure and utter joy and it suited him. I wanted to capture that, to hold on to it because I wasn't sure how long it would last. His eyes were still trained on the water as I pulled the camera to my eye and began to click away while he remained totally oblivious. Swiftly I moved to his other side, which allowed me to not only get him in the picture but also the bridge and again I clicked away.

"What are you doing?" He asked, and I snapped out of my zone.

"Nothing."

"You better not be taking pictures of me."

"I'm not." I lied.

"Liar."

"I can't help it."

He groaned and I walked over towards him while I put away the camera. "Would it make you feel better if I took one of us?"

"Yes." He smiled and I reached into my pocket for my little digital camera. "No… With the big one."

"I can't hold the big one far enough away and I paid too much to trust that with a stranger." I replied and he huffed.

"I have longer arms."

"Nope. No one touches that camera but me… And Scott."

"Scott?" He asked while lifting an eyebrow.

"The one who owns the gallery that sells my photos."

"Should I be worried?"

"Well… He is awfully handsome." I laughed, picturing the aged man in my mind. "And he's really, very sweet."

He growled. "Does he make your heart race?" His voice was husky and jealous and confident as he pulled me close to him before placing his cheek against my own. His lips near my ear. "Do I need to hunt him down and show him that you are mine?"

My heart was racing at his proximity, at his words and I found that I could not speak so I merely shook my head.

"Say it." He whispered before placing a kiss against the back of my jaw. "Say it."

"I'm yours." I replied much more breathy than I had intended but it couldn't have been helped.

"You're mine." He said and I could hear the pride in his voice.

"Now… Are you done dazzling me?"

He laughed and nodded his head. "For now."

**A/N:**

**Wow that's the fastest I've updated in a while!**

**I wanted to keep going but if I kept going this would have been a chapter that would have been 13,000 words or more… And that was just too much. So I've decided to make San Francisco into two chapters… The good… And probably one that won't be quite so fluffy… This chapter was much needed fluff because from here on out it will mainly be the climax… So get prepared. We are about to get some twists and turns very, very soon.**

**First off: A BIG thank you to zgirl21 for offering to help me work through the rest of this story and for bouncing ideas off for the sequel. Go read her story Bleeding Love… It's really good and I guarantee you'll like it!**

**Second: Thank you to everyone who continues to add this story (even in the long run, many of you are telling me you've just found it and that means a lot to me that you are sticking out all the chapters because there are a lot!). And thank you to those who continue to leave reviews! I appreciate that you take the time to do that!**

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dwebb88: I'm from the south bay… I love San Francisco so it had to make an appearance.  
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**Thank you all so much! Please continue to send me your thoughts! They mean the world to me! I hope to have another chapter to you by Sunday… But it might take a bit longer. Classes start again on Tuesday so we'll see. But I'll try my hardest!**


	29. Chapter 29

A/N: I'm doing something new… I'm going to write down all the songs that inspired me as I write my chapters. So, on with the show.

Chapter Twenty Nine Playlist:  
Jeff Buckley, _Lilac Wine  
_Sarah Dashew, _Morningtime_

Oh and you should know… You're in for a lot of Edward angst (especially in the beginning). Edward is going through a rather rough time… And you're going to see some major mood swings and he may even curse a little, which is definitely out of character for him but he isn't from the early nineteen hundreds…

* * *

**Baby You Can Stop Running  
Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or characters that are recognizable to the saga. I do however, own any characters that are not from the books… Though sometimes, like, when they are bad, evil characters, I wish I didn't.**

**Chapter Twenty Nine**

_**Edward**_

I wish that someone had told me, long before I ever started things with Bella, just how difficult love truly is. Because there I stood in the hallway of her apartment, my eyes trained on her form, wondering how I had let it get this far, how I had allowed her to give herself to me without knowing the implications of her actions. I closed my eyes and shook my head, a desperate attempt to shake the thoughts from my mind that had been there for three days now. Still, when I did open them I couldn't take my eyes off of her; she was curled on the couch as she read one of her ridiculous novels (okay, ridiculous is a harsh word, silly maybe), probably Pride and Prejudice or Romeo and Juliet, held tightly in her hands as she turned the pages. Her taste in literature was something I found annoyingly adorable and though not exactly my taste, I wouldn't change hers for the world. I loved that she was so optimistic about love, that she fully heartedly believed in its powers to overcome all. We were each other's polar opposites in that sense. I wanted to revel in her optimism and I felt sick for that because her view was the only thing getting me through this. I _wanted _her to be right; I _needed_ her to be right if I was going to come out of this unscathed.

I didn't want to think about that anymore and I turned my attention back to her, to study her frame in its surroundings. She looked good here and I was beginning to wonder if we should just stay here and never go back. At least I could hold off whoever it was that was out looking for me, ready to inflict their evil agenda. I stood a chance at keeping Bella safe here if they couldn't find me. Esme and Carlisle could send me my things and we could take residency in this apartment that I was beginning to love more and more. This place would hold all my best memories of Bella when she would no longer be around, when she would leave because of the secrets that I was hiding from her. This was the time that I wished I was more optimistic. If I were, I wouldn't have to worry about things like this, about Bella leaving me.

I wished that I could have willed my mind to stop working because the silence was not exactly welcomed. It seemed that whenever I was left alone with my thoughts, I could only imagine the possibilities of what would happen if Bella knew the truth. I should have told her right away, I should have listened to Alice, to Esme, to Carlisle, even Jasper for that matter. It was just that the more time that passed, the easier it was to convince myself that it was for her own good that I wasn't telling her and even though I _knew_ I should have, I just could never do it. I wanted to, so badly on our first night in San Francisco, and I almost had, until she looked at me and I saw the lust in her eyes. The hormones that I had lacked as a teenager were rearing their ugly head and as ashamed as I am to admit it, it was always easier giving in to them than it was to tell her the truth. I just prayed that it wouldn't come back to bite me in the ass in the long run. Which, knowing Bella and her stubbornness, it probably would. But the side of me that was both logical and illogical at the same time was telling me to take what she gave me and make the memories so that I would have something to cling on to when it all ended.

Again I closed my eyes and shook the thoughts that were entering into my mind. Leaving Forks wasn't an option right now, besides, she _wanted _to go back for Charlie and if I did anything to disturb that, I could never forgive myself. When I opened my eyes once again I continued to stare at her, my feelings a mixture of love, lust, hope, longing, and sadness. Though I suppose my lust wasn't helped by the fact that she was wearing those dark, skinny leg jeans that show every single line of her curves, the slight protruding of her hip bone where it juts out, the delicate roundness of her backside and, if she moves just the right way, the slight indentation on her outer thigh. It also doesn't escape my notice that she was wearing my sweater; the black Hugo Boss cardigan that Esme had bought. I had only worn it once, on a night when I took Bella to Port Angeles to watch a movie to just get away from everything in Forks. She came home with me that night and the next morning the sweater was gone. I suppose I know where it went now and I couldn't help but smile that she had had it all along.

Bella was like that. Always taking things that didn't belong to her but ultimately, they did. Just like my heart. Then again, my heart had never beat like it had until she showed up so maybe my heart _did_ belong to her all along. I didn't make a sound, content to just watch her from my place in the hallway. It was one of those perfect moments all in itself. I just wanted to stand there and observe her, to study each curve of her body, the lines of her neck that in the moment I began to think about it, I longed to press my lips against and breathe in her sweet fragrance.

No one ever tells you how difficult loving someone is. Movies, music, and literature, they all build love up. They make you believe that the hardest part is finding it or accepting it. Though, I suppose I wouldn't have been so keen to accept the lies that these sources spew in their tales of love had it not been for the relationships that I had witnessed around me. Though there is little that I remember of them, what little that I remember of my own parents, I know that they were crazy about each other. The kind of crazy that drives you insane, that pulls at you from the inside and holds on, never letting go, the same kind of feeling that I knew I was feeling for Bella. Carlisle and Esme were also the picture of relationship perfection; never away from each other for more than a few nights because any more than that and it would be too much, always finding ways to touch each other even after twenty plus years of marriage. And then there is Alice and Jasper, who took the lemons of my difficult situation and made lemonade from it. I know that I am partially the reason that they are together and I couldn't be happier for them. They both deserve it so much and I suppose, I don't think I could ever see Alice with anyone but Jasper, no one else would ever be good enough for her. But I suppose it's the love around me that makes this all so damn difficult.

The love that surrounded me took years to cultivate, years to nurture into the relationships that were present and here was Bella and I. All that love at first sight, star crossed lovers crap was circulating around in my head at a rapid rate and I couldn't help but think that was exactly what we were. I wanted to know of another couple besides Romeo and Juliet who had so recklessly thrown themselves into a relationship under impossible circumstances and to know what the outcome would be. I would never be able to go through with this is Bella's demise was like that of Juliet's. Her death would be at my hands if that were to be the case. _Fuck Edward… Get your shit together. _Angst was apparently, my constant companion.

How do I tell her that the reason that the bullets that wounded her father were meant for me? How do I tell her that she can't be safe if she is around me? How do I tell her that I can't be with her until all this is settled? How do I do this when I know that it might break her and she has already been so broken by Jacob? But above all, how do I do this knowing that it's not the right thing to do? How do I convince myself that I _can_ live without her? How do I make myself believe the lie?

This is probably why authors and songwriters don't tell this tale. Who would read it if the ending was sad? We live in a world that is already cruel; no one wants to experience that in the fantasy land that film, music and literature create. A truly happy ending isn't logical for someone in my place. My pessimistic side keeps telling me that I won't even be around that much longer. Maybe that would be the easiest way for it all. If I go now… If I end it all now… The future won't matter. My thoughts, my worries, all of it won't matter. _Keep telling yourself that._ Stupid, rational thought, it _would_ matter because I knew that if I did have it end now… if I allowed myself to venture into the darkness, I wouldn't just be hurting my family, I would be destroying the pure and innocent angel that had somehow managed to love me. Even that wouldn't be an option.

I couldn't handle the quiet any longer and I was actually surprised that she hadn't seen or heard me from my place in the hallway.

"I was wondering where that sweater went." I finally spoke. I smiled as I watched her jump, not having heard my quiet observation.

"I… I'm sorry?" she blushed that deep red that I was so entranced by and I walked over to where she was sitting, taking a spot on the couch beside her and letting her rest her feet in my lap.

"It's okay. Looks better on you anyways." I grinned.

"That was a quick shower." She commented, tossing the book down on the coffee table. I caught sight of the title, _Jude the Obscure_. That surprised me; then again, Bella was always surprising me.

I shrugged. "Though I knew you were a fan of the classics Bella, I'm quite surprised you are reading Thomas Hardy. He isn't exactly a fan of the perfect ending."

"Maybe endings aren't always perfect."

_There went my only hope for optimism._ "What happened to my Bella? The one who loves happy endings and romantic tales?" Had my behavior the past few weeks pushed to her believe that the books had lied to her. _Fuck… Even when I'm trying to be good for her, I always seem to mess it up. _The last thing I wanted to do was take away her optimism, her belief in a happy ending, it was the only thing that was getting me through all this, the only thing that actually made me _almost_ believe that we could have it all.

"Come on Edward… It's not like his endings are always terribly depressing or anything. And okay, _Jude_ is really depressing but I mean… Okay, Tess dies in _Tess_ but I mean, Angel and Liza Lu get married… I mean, they made lemonade out of lemons right? And I mean, Elfride didn't exactly get her perfect ending in _A Pair of Blue Eyes_ but she was loved and I guess… Maybe in the end that's all that matters. What more can we ask for than to love and be loved in return?" My Bella was back, slightly… Though maybe it was just because of Thomas Hardy… Maybe if she _had _been reading Jane Austen or Charlotte Brontë then her reaction would have been different. Obviously Thomas Hardy was staying in the apartment as I hadn't packed it. That would be a good thing. I didn't want the notions of tragic endings running through her head; I needed to keep her optimistic, it was my only hope. _I'm such a fucking hypocrite._

"Quoting Moulin Rouge now?" I smiled and she smiled back, tossing a pillow at my head that I caught before it made contact. "Hungry?"

"I could probably eat something." She replied, sinking down further into the couch tucking her feet between my legs. I visibly shivered feeling how cold they were through my jeans and pressed my legs down harder against them in an attempt to warm then quickly.

"More tired than hungry?" We had been packing all day and I was thankful for that because we had been in San Francisco for four days now and with the packing behind us, we could just spend the rest of the time together. I was even contemplating asking her if she wanted to extend the stay a little longer. I just wasn't ready to go back and face everything there. I hoped that she would agree to it. I had already approached Carlisle with the idea and he was more than fine with it, muttering something along the lines of 'if it kept me sane then I should just stay there.'

"Nope. Let's go out and get something." She finally spoke, standing up and pulling me up with her; her arms around my waist before I could even grasp my equilibrium, but I was okay with that.

* * *

It was cold, but you never would have guessed that by the sun that was beating down on the city. Bella was dragging me down Post Street, her hand fused against my own as the bitter wind nipped at our exposed faces. I had to squint to see anything, and that was even with the sunglasses that were perched on my nose.

"Isn't it supposed to be foggy around here?" I grumbled and her chuckle filled my ears. I was thankful I could hear it over the busy streets here at Union Square.

"Not all the time." She smiled, leaning into me, her shoulder rubbing against my own.

"Stupid sun." I grumbled and she playfully smacked my shoulder.

"Take that back Edward Cullen! I love the sun. It is so nice to see it for once. I forgot how much I missed it."

"I'll take the rain any day."

"We are so not compatible."

"Opposites attract sweetheart… opposites attract." I grinned, slipping my hand from hers and wrapping my arm around her waist so she was flush against my left side. "Where are we going anyway?"

"You'll see. Stop being so impatient."

"I can't help it. I've lived with Alice for far too long. Where are we going?"

"You are such a child." She laughed before holding one hand up and pointing up the street. "Just up there a few more blocks."

"We could get there a lot faster if you'd let me carry you."

"No."

I pouted the rest of the way and was surprised when I felt her body stop in front of a more modern building. There was a rather minimalist sign that read Scott Smith on the door. I turned to the side to look at her, arching one eye brow in question and she nodded her answer. Before she could open the door for herself I reached forward and gripped the handle, letting her pass through first. I didn't even have time to take in the surroundings before I heard someone yelling.

"Bella Swan!" A girl shouted and I looked up to see someone walking towards us. She was of average height, probably about five foot, five, her slender body squeezed into a tight black pencil skirt with a black blouse that was probably unbuttoned a little too much to be considered professional and her blonde hair pulled into a bun on her head. Her eyes fell on me and instinctively I slid up closer to Bella, wrapping my arm around her waist tighter and keeping her as close to me as possible to thwart any unwanted advances.

"Hi Amanda." Bella was speaking through tight lips and I had noticed how her body had gone slightly rigid before I had the good sense to pull her into me. I wanted to be sure she knew that I wasn't attracted to this girl at all because though she tried to hide it, I still knew that Bella didn't see herself quite clearly.

"And who is this?" She purred and I fought the urge to roll my eyes, annoyed that the woman was so blatantly flirting with me when it was clear that I was with Bella. She visibly stiffened against my side and I looked down and saw that her eyes met my own and I rubbed her side lightly trying to let her know that the other woman had no effect whatsoever on me.

"This is my boyfriend, Edward. Edward, this is Amanda, we worked her together before I took the job at the museum."

"Well you certainly have been hiding him away Bella. I'm sure Jason is going to go cry in his beer when he sees this one here with you."

I felt that heat boil up deep within me at the mention of some man's name and I had to work hard to keep my voice level. "Jason?"

Bella opened her mouth but Amanda spoke before she could even utter a word. "Jason is Mr. Smith's son. He's been chasing after Bella for the past two years. I imagine Scott will be slightly upset. I know how much he has always wanted you to be part of his family."

"Scott will be happy for me regardless." Bella muttered before regaining her confidence. "Is he around?"

"He's out to lunch but he should be back in a little bit." Amanda sneered, obviously upset that her game had not fallen in her favor because I watched as she glared at Bella as I dropped a kiss to the top of her head.

"Okay, well Edward and I are just going to look around for a while. I'd like to introduce the two of them."

"I'll let him know you're here when he gets back." She said curtly before turning on her black heels to go back to the desk.

"Come on. I want to show you around."

I obliged and fell into pace with her as we walked around the rather large gallery. I couldn't help but notice that the photographs were arranged by artist and I began studying them, knowing full well that this was the gallery that housed some of Bella's work, trying to figure out which ones were her own. There were the artists that I knew of, Ansel Adams, Minor White… And then there were the smaller, lesser known artists and I still couldn't help but gawk at the price tags. Sure, I knew they would be expensive but I guess I never really thought that even those who weren't as well known would have gone for so much.

Bella never said a word as we walked though. We would reach an artist that I had thought might be hers and I would look down to meet her eyes and she would respond with a shake of her head.

"These are lovely." I spoke finally, interrupting the comfortable silence that had fallen between us, as we reached another artist and Bella merely stood there, her eyes gazing over the photographs before us. I glanced at the artists name, Maria Dwyer. "I think my mother has one of these."

"Really?" Her voice was pitchy but I was too captivated by the photo before me. I wasn't quite sure where it was taken but it was of an older couple in a park. It was blatantly obvious how in love they were as they sat there under the large tree. His arm was draped casually over his wife's shoulder and his other hand cradled hers and they were laughing about something, completely unaware of the world around them.

"Yea. I remember the name. Esme and Carlisle were down here for a medical convention; I was suppose to meet them, it was when I was doing my internship in New York but I was held up because of an emergency. When I came home I remember seeing the photograph in their bedroom and asking about it. I had this physical draw to the photo… Something was just different about it. I actually almost took it from them to bring back to New York but Esme loves it too much." He shrugged. "Maybe I should get another."

"No." She replied and I looked down at her lifting one eyebrow.

"I know it's expensive Bella but I assure you that it's not an issue."

"Why pay for one when you can get one for free?"

"What?" I was slowly putting everything together and my eyes went wide as I understood. "You're?"

She nodded and I leaned down to press my lips against her own.

"I'm Maria Dwyer." She responded casually when we pulled away.

"I told you that you were talented Bella. I had honestly never fallen in love with a photograph so quickly." She blushed and I smiled. "Where was this?"

"Golden Gate Park." She replied, leaning into my side. "It's actually Scott and his wife. Scott has always been like a father to me, and Rachel was almost like my stand in mother. Since I met them three years ago, they always invited me to family gatherings. I would go to their house for Christmas and Thanksgiving… Scott even bought me my car here in San Francisco, saying that he always wanted a daughter. He had some ridiculous fantasy of buying her her first car and teaching her how to drive. Although I knew how to drive he made me take it and wouldn't hear anything more on the subject."

"Probably why he wants you to marry his son." I grumbled.

"Anyways…" She smiled before standing on her toes and kissing my cheek. "They were having some family reunion at the park and asked if I would come. I agreed and when I was standing off to the side speaking to his niece I saw them off by themselves and there was something so intimate and beautiful… I had to take the picture. Scott adored it obviously and he won't sell it but he loves to show it off."

"They look so much in love."

"They are." She wistfully replied. "They actually remind me a lot of Carlisle and Esme; always sneaking glances at each other, smiling when the other enters into the room. After all those years together, after all those years of marriage… It's beautiful. I can only hope to have that for myself one day."

"I'll give you that Bella… I want to give you that." I whispered softly and I wasn't sure she even heard because she just stood there.

"Please don't say things like that to me unless you mean it."

"I do mean it Bella. I don't want to scare you away at all but I want you… all of you , forever. I want to call you my own and I want to make sure that everyone knows it." My lips were against her ear and I felt her shiver in my arms, and I was unable to hide the smile that had formed on my lips.

"Bella!" A loud low voice called again and I growled at the interruption, however when we pulled away I instantly recognized the man from the photograph. Bella twisted from my grasp and walked to the man, allowing him to envelope her into a large, fatherly hug.

"Hi Scott!" Her voice was excited and I found myself feeding on her joy though I could still feel the nerves as they began to settle in knowing that this man was almost as important to her as her own father and I was moments away from meeting him.

"How have you been sweetheart?" He asked as they pulled away and he held her shoulders taking a good look at her. "You are positively glowing! How is your father?"

"He's doing well; actually he just went back to work this week."

"So you're back?"

"Not exactly…" She smiled looking over her shoulder at me. "There's someone I want you to meet." I walked closer to them fully aware of Scott's inquiring eyes as he visually sized me up. "Scott, this is Edward. Edward, this is Scott, my California father."

"It's very nice to meet you sir." I smiled extending my hand to shake his own with the confident firmness that Carlisle had taught me so many years ago.

"Likewise." His voice was indifferent before he turned to Bella. "You've got yourself a fine young man there Bella."

"I think so." She smiled, slipping her hand into mine and I returned the grin as our eyes met.

"Can we be expecting any more photographs if you are moving back to Washington, as you can see, they are all sold out."

"I think we can work something out. I'm keeping my apartment but I want to be closer to Charlie for awhile… And this one here is a pretty nice bonus as well."

"What do you do Edward?"

"I'm a surgeon at Forks Community Hospital but I've been thinking of transferring to a hospital in Seattle." I saw Bella's smile widen.

"Is that so Edward? You never said anything about that?"

"I wanted to surprise you. I've spoken with Carlisle and he is friends with the Chief of surgery at Northwest Hospital and he has been asking him if he has room for another resident."

"Well, I have a meeting with an artist that I'm trying to showcase so I'll leave you two alone but please call me Bella so we can discuss your work further." He smiled at her. "I'm so happy that you have found happiness sweetheart, you deserve it and as much as I wish that it could have been with my son, I see how he couldn't even come close to this man standing here by your side."

"That means the world to me Scott and please say hi to Rachel for me." I could see the tears that were straining to escape her eyes.

"I will. And Edward, it was very nice to meet you and please take care of Bella for me."

"It was very nice to meet you as well and I plan on it sir." He nodded and walked towards the stairs that presumably went to his office leaving Bella and I alone once again.

"So did I pass the test?"

"You sure did." She smiled, her arms around my neck as she laced her fingers through my hair, pulling me down closer to her. Her lips were warm and soft and I allowed myself to give in for a little while, enjoying the way she tasted until I had to pull away, knowing that I would only want more if we continued.

"How come you didn't tell me about Seattle?"

"I wanted to make sure it was a done deal first."

"Are you only doing it because of me?"

"No. I'm doing it because it's a great opportunity. Northwest Hospital is a fantastic hospital and you just happen to be a wonderful bonus." I grinned, using her words.

* * *

"Thanks for finally calling back Edward." Alice shouted into the phone. Since we had arrived I had been ignoring all calls that were coming from Forks… I knew that answering them meant dealing with the letters that were probably still coming to the house and to be frank, I didn't want to think about that and I had just hoped that they would have respected that. "We've been calling you for the past six days Edward."

"So sorry if I just wanted to get away and be with Bella without the looming dread of the letters that have been coming to the house Alice." I growled back, not really happy with her tone, or the fact that she was bothering me. I got out of the bed knowing that this conversation was going to be loud and I didn't want to wake Bella who had fallen asleep an hour ago.

"Running away from this isn't going to make it go away."

"You think I don't know that?"

"Well you certainly are acting like that's the case." She retorted. "Have you even told Bella yet?"

"Don't do this now Alice."

"I'll take that as a no."

"It's not that I haven't wanted to."

"Sure… I'm so sure you've tried."

"What are you saying Alice?"

"I'm saying that you're a coward."

"What do you want from me? If I tell her she is going to leave me."

"Maybe now she has every right to. God Edward…"

"I don't think I could keep living if she left me Alice and I realize that I've seriously fucked up by not telling her but I don't know how to do it. It's going to hurt her and I don't want to do that."

"As much as I want to yell at you for not telling her, that isn't why I've really called. It's not really the reason that we've been frantically trying to get in touch with you."

"What do you mean?" I asked and I could hear the fear in her tone of voice, the one that told me that whatever she was going to tell me was going to be something that I wouldn't want to hear.

"The letters are still coming Edward and well…"

"Spill it Alice." My heart raced, pounding violently against my chest as I returned to the doorway of the bedroom, my eyes falling on Bella's peaceful form, tucked safely away in the bed and all I wanted to do was be in there with her, to have her arms around me, to forget about it all.

"Jasper and I have been opening them and reading them."

"That's a felony." I joked, failing miserably trying to lighten the mood, trying to steady the nerves that had filled my body, to calm the wave of anxiety that had washed over me.

"Edward." Her tone was soft and ominous and I knew what she was going to say before the words had even been spoken. "They know about Bella…"

* * *

**A/N:**

**So I haven't left you with a cliffhanger for a few chapters now so I thought I would leave you with one this time… Evil I know… So… When is Edward going to tell Bella?! I don't know! I guess you'll have to keep reading to find out but I think it is going to be soon… Very soon.**

**I wanted to give a great big thanks to all my reviewers, the list is getting longer and longer so I'm only going to answer some of the people who had questions/observations but know that I appreciate every single one of them! From here on out I am going to personally thank you through a response but I'll answer big questions here on my notes. **

**Flecour and McDramaQueen: You both mentioned something that was very similar. I agree, I never should have pulled that much from the books… It really did hurt the flow. I will never do that again! But I appreciate the constructive criticism and I'm really glad that you stuck it out to get to the rest. **

**Flower123: Edward will tell Bella… I'm just waiting for the pivotal moment. **

**Monstergrrlshow: Edward is taking so long because he is scared of losing Bella. Either way, in his mind, it's a lose-lose situation. If he tells her that the shooting was because the people were after him and instead they harmed Charlie, he is afraid that it's going to send her running away from him. But now, he's scared because he knows that no matter what they are going to find out about her, a fear that was confirmed at the end of this chapter, and he doesn't quite know what to do about it. He knows that he can't live without her and now he doesn't know what to do because both situations will take her away from him. With the group knowing about her, he isn't sure if he should leave her or stay around… It's difficult.**

**.: The song is called Come Around and it is by Rosi Golan. You can get the song on iTunes but I recommend the entire CD if you are into acoustic/folk. I'm a huge fan of that genre, I feel that unlike with most pop songs, there in an intensity behind the music that you can just feel… The playlist for this story (the rest of it ) will probably be songs from Jeff Buckley, Rosi Golan, Sarah Dashew, Van Morrison (who I feel is one of the few musicians who truly lets the music take over him… His stuff is powerful), Bob Dylan… I could go on for longer but I'll spare you.**

**I'mTheRemix: Bella is going to live with Jasper and Alice in Seattle for a while, until she finds her own place.**

**So thank you to everyone who has taken the time to review, from here on out, expect personalized thank you's to appear in your inbox, if you don't get one it's because you will be mentioned in an author's note because of a question that you posed that I feel is pertinent to the story or what not.**

**One more thing: I wish I was in London now… Not last year. Of course Robert Pattinson is there NOW… **

**Oh and another: Did anyone else get teary eyed when Barack and Michelle danced their first dance? Oh man… When he told her "I love you" I was almost a goner. **

**Preview of next chapter:**

**"I didn't want to believe the words that Carlisle and Esme had said. All my life they had led me to believe one thing and though she had tried to rectify her actions, I wasn't sure that I could ever forgive my mother for the pain that she was casuing me now in her death. It wasn't that I didn't love her, but knowing that had she made a different decision, had she done the right thing all along, she and my father would still be here with me and Bella would have been safe."  
**


	30. Chapter 30

Play list:  
William Fitzsimmons: _I Don't Feel It Anymore (Song of the Sparrow)  
_Lifehouse: _Broken_

This chapter has multiple point of view shifts which I was trying to steer away from because I know it can get confusing but it couldn't really have been helped… I apologize now though. If you have any questions please just le me know and I'll be sure to clear it up for you!

* * *

**Baby You Can Stop Running  
Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight… I only own the characters that I have created.**

**Chapter Thirty**

_**Edward**_

My eyes burned, if it was caused by the tears that had sucked my eyes of all their moisture or from the salty ocean air, I wasn't certain but I was thankful of the small bottle of Visine that I had taken to carrying everywhere to hide the redness from Bella's questioning gaze. I hadn't had a solid night of sleep since the conversation with Alice, my mind was too preoccupied with formulating plans that would keep Bella safe and if I was being honest with myself, I was afraid that if I took my eyes off of her, or if I let her out of my arms, that I would never see her again, that she would be taken away from me, possibly forever.

"_Do they know where we are Alice?" Bella began to stir in the bed so I shut the door quietly and walked to the living room trying to be as quiet as possible though I knew that I had already woke her up. My main priority was keeping her away from the conversation, not wanting her to find out this way. _

"_Not that we know of… Edward, you really need to come home."_

"_Why so I can lead them straight to her? No, that's not going to happen. She's safe here; we are safe here."_

"_Carlisle needs to talk to you Edward but he won't do it over the phone. It's pertinent."_

"_I don't care. I need more time to think about this, to process this, to figure out what I'm going to do now. If I go back and I'm not prepared… if something happens to her Alice… I'd never be able to live with myself."_

"_We're going to alert the police."_

"_They can't do anything; we don't even know who it is."_

"_Carlisle might have an idea. You both really need to talk."_

"_Not now."_

"_Please come back Edward."_

"_I'll be back in a few days… I just need more time."_

"_Edward? Is everything okay?" I looked up to see Bella standing there, a look of concern etched into her face and I closed the distance between us in five long strides._

"_Goodbye Alice." I closed the phone, tossing it back on the chair before I wrapped my arms around her, pulling her close to me and breathing in her sweet fragrance. "It's fine… It's going to be fine."I wasn't sure who I was trying to convince: Bella, or myself._

I was lost in my thoughts, hearing only the sound of the waves as they crashed against the sandy shore at Lovers Point Park, and I pulled Bella tighter against my chest as we sat on a dry patch of sand watching the waves roll in. The wind blew her hair and I could smell the delicious mixture of both her strawberry shampoo and the salty ocean air, doing all I could to commit the moment deep into my memory knowing that there would never be another moment as perfect as this one. Still, as much as I wanted to be content, to enjoy the feel of Bella's warm body against my own, I couldn't focus on it, because my mind was miles away from the present. The worry that I had felt before was becoming a reality and I was terrified now, not only about telling Bella about her father but also about what could possibly happen to her now that whoever it was that was after me knew about her, and would, presumably, stop at nothing to hurt her if it meant hurting me.

"You're awfully quiet." Her voice sounded far away, as though she was on one side of a very long tunnel calling out to me. It was impossible though, I knew she was there with me, wrapped tightly in my arms, maybe even a little too tight but she wasn't complaining so I didn't really care because I just wanted to keep her there, forever.

"Edward?" She said again, turning her head to the side so she could look at me but we were so close that her nose grazed against my jaw and my body shivered from the sensual contact. "What's wrong?"

"There's something I need to tell you." I said softly holding her even tighter if that was possible as her lips touched my jaw. "I just don't know if I can."

"You can tell me anything." She whispered as she moved one hand from her lap and placed her palm against my cheek. It was warm against my wind chilled face and her softness of her fingertips, lulled my eyes closed as her thumb gently rubbed my cheekbone. Her soft fingers were a nice contrast to the stubble on my cheeks from a few days of not shaving.

"Bella… I."

"You can tell me."

"It's my fault that Charlie was shot Bella." She was quiet so I continued. "Someone has been looking for me because of what I did to James and the police caught wind of criminal activity and found him before he found me." I could feel the tears begin to fall down my cheeks though where they were coming from I couldn't say. "The bullets were meant for me and it's all my fault. I never should have moved here, if I had then he never would have gotten hurt, and now they know about you and I don't know what to do."

Her fingers were brushing away the tears that were falling and as I opened my eyes I saw that she too was silently crying and I pulled her deeper into my chest, letting her head rest in the crook of my neck, her warm tears wetting my shirt. "I love you Bella. I promise to keep you safe. I'll do whatever it takes. I'm so sorry…"

We were silent for a long while, just hold on to each other until we had no more tears to cry. She pulled away and looked up at me with sad eyes and I felt my heart break.

"This was what you were talking to Alice about wasn't it?"

"Yes." I hung my head.

"How long have you known about this?" Her voice was steady though I imagined that she was fighting a battle within herself to keep calm. I would have rather she yelled at me, I would have deserved it.

"About a month now, maybe a little more."

Her tears started again and I reached down to wipe them but she pulled out of my embrace and stood up, turning her back on me as she walked along the beach.

"Bella please." I whimpered, standing up and reaching for her arm but she yanked it away. I could feel my heart break and I wasn't sure what I was going to do.

"I can't believe you've known about this for that long and didn't think I deserved to know!" There it was, the yelling and I immediately took back my desire for her to do so. Her words felt like a knife through my heart and I knew that there was nothing that I could do.

"I was afraid of telling you Bella… Please." I began to beg, reaching out again for her but watching as she took a few more steps back. "I love you and I was afraid to lose you. Please Bella… I need you to forgive me."

"I just… I can't Edward." She whispered, turning her head to look back towards the parking lot. "I trusted you…"

"I know I…"

"Listen to me… It's not your fault that Charlie was shot… That's part of his job… But you should have told me Edward… I.."

"I know how hard it is for you to trust someone Bella, especially after what Jacob did to you but I promise I'm not him… I really thought I was doing the right thing."

"I know you think it was the right thing but what do you think I was going through these past few weeks Edward?! Do you have any idea?"

"I just thought."

"How can you even think that we are in a relationship if you can't tell me when something is that important?"

"I wanted to protect you Bella."

"Protecting me means telling me what is going on."

"I know that now." I whispered trying to catch her eyes but she adverted them, looking out onto the horizon instead to the sun that was beginning to set.

"I need some time Edward…"

"I can't give you time Bella. I need to keep you safe."

"I have Emmett and Charlie, I'll be fine. I really need to be without you for a while and think about everything."

"I'm so sorry Bella."

"I know."

"If I could go back and take it all back I would."

"But you can't so there really isn't a point talking about it is there?"

"I wish there was something I could do."

"There is… Give me some time." She whispered, finally allowing me to wrap my arms around her, to pull her against me. I could feel her body trembling against mine as she cried so I just held her closer, rubbing her back softly with my fingers, wishing that I could take it all back, watching her cry was something that I never wanted to see and knowing that I had put the tears in her eyes was unbearable.

* * *

I pulled up alongside the Swan's house and stopped at the curb before looking over at her. She was already getting out of the car before I had the chance to open my mouth so I followed suit, popping the trunk so that we could get her bag out.

"I can do it." She said, her voice quiet and I was thankful that her tone hadn't been quite as harsh has it had been before we stepped onto the plane.

"Just let me get it." I pleaded.

"No!" She replied and I backed up and let her, knowing that right now she was still hurt and upset. I let my eyes survey the scene, searching for anything that would bring me to think that someone was there watching the house.

"I think you should stay at our house Bella." I mused cautiously "If anything I'll know that you're safe and we can talk."

"I don't want to talk right now Edward. I'm still processing."

"Then I'll at least feel better knowing you're safe. You can stay in the guest bedroom… I'll stay in my own bedroom. I just want to know that you're okay."

"I'll be fine."

"Let Alice come over tonight at least."

"I don't want to talk." She said through clenched teeth.

"I said to have Alice come over."

"Why so you can let her talk some 'sense' into me? So that she can convince me that what you did was the right thing?"

"You'll find that Alice will be on your side. She's been pressuring me to tell you… Carlisle and Esme too. The decision was all my own and I'm the only one that you should be angry with." I sighed. "Don't punish the others. They love you Bella."

"Fine. Alice can come over but no one else." She murmured and I could see the unshed tears, shining in her eyes.

"Can I walk you to the door at least?" I whispered and I watched as she shook her head.

"I think you should just go home and talk to Carlisle…"

"Can I call you later?"

"I don't think that's a good idea."

"I take it you aren't coming over tomorrow still then?"

"Tomorrow?"

"Thursday, it's Thanksgiving. You told Esme and Carlisle that the four of you would come over for dinner." I was searching her eyes, looking for any glimmer of hope that she would still want to send the day with my family and I.

"We'll be there… It's too late to buy everything to just do our own thing and you're right, it's not your family that I'm upset at."

"Just me." I said quietly as my let my eyes fall to the floor and she sighed.

"Edward…" I saw her feet in my line of vision so I knew she had taken a step forward and then I felt her hand on my face, her soft thumb stroking my cheek. "I'm just hurt that you didn't say something sooner… All this time I've thought you were pulling away from me and if I had known that it had nothing at all to do with me, that it wasn't something that I could control… I think I wouldn't have been feeling so insecure. I don't know… I just need to process, to think about everything."

"Do you still want to be with me?" I questioned softly and looked up to meet her eyes. The tears that had once been pooling in her eyes were now falling down her cheeks.

"I do."

I reached forward and brushed a few strands of her hair behind her ear. "I'll have Alice call later to let you know when she will be over." She nodded and I leaned down and placed a kiss on her cheek. "I love you."

"I know." She responded as she turned her back and started up the drive, pausing only at the door to look back at me with that heartbreaking sad smile on her lips. I had never hated myself more.

* * *

_**Carlisle**_

Seventeen years I've kept Elizabeth Masen's secret from her son, from the boy that my wife and I chose to raise as our own because we had grown to love him just as much as his own parents. It wasn't something that I wanted to do, but Edward, my best friend from medical school, had sworn me to secrecy if anything was to ever happen to them, I had never even told Esme what he had once said, and I would tell her everything. I knew that Edward had the right to know, that now, the information was pertinent to finding out whom it was that was after him; who was still seeking to seek revenge on the late Elizabeth Masen, even after her death.

"Edward?" I said peering over the couch where my son was slumped. I could see the anguish in his eyes as he stared at the television, watching it, but not really processing it. He hadn't moved since he had come home and changed into long pajama pants. He was wallowing and I figured it had to do with Bella. "What's wrong son?"

"Bella… She is processing." His voice was dull and I longed for the happiness that he had exuded a mere two and a half months ago when she had come into his life, into our lives.

"Processing?"

"What she is going to do next… She's upset, rightly so, with me for not telling her."

"So you told her?" I questioned and he nodded his head, closing his eyes as though he was fighting back tears. "You did the right thing."

"Not telling her?"

"No… Telling her. That's why I need to do the right thing now." He opened his eyes once again and looked at me. Even after seventeen years, I was startled by how much he looked like his father: the piercing green eyes that told every emotion he was feeling, the mess of hair that rested on his head, the strong, chiseled jaw. He was a spitting image of his father minus the hair; the hair was the one quality that he had inherited from Elizabeth, the strange bronze color that I had never seen naturally before. I snapped from my trance to see that he was searching my own eyes trying to understand what it was that I could possibly tell him that could be so bad. I walked to the other side and sat down on the other end of the couch before taking a deep breath to calm the nerves. He could very possibly hate me after this.

"You have heard of the Volturi and the Malinovsky mobs I presume?" He nodded and I closed my eyes before continuing. "Do you know much?"

"I know that they both are pretty large drug cartels. Don't they fix sporting events too?"

I nodded. "They fix elections as well."

"What does this have to do with anything?"

I sighed and leaned my head back against the pillows as I realized that this was going to be harder than I had first imagined. "Your father, about three months before they died found out that your mother was somewhat involved with them."

"She wouldn't do that. She was honorable." He snapped forward, his eyes narrowing into slits as he glared at me. "You've always told me that she was honorable."

"Your mother had very high aspirations Edward and female politicians weren't exactly the norm then. It was at a time when the Malinovsky's had more clout then the Volturi and they wanted to maintain that power for as long as they could. Alec would do anything to maintain his power and that meant getting an insider in the political system."

"I don't understand."

"The Volturi and the Malinovsky's used to be one in the same Edward. As you know, the names of the leaders never change, their bloodlines go straight back to the fall of Rome."

"Volturi yes. But what about Malinovsky? Russian remember? Are they descendents of the Romanovs?"

I shook my head, "Alec Malinovsky is a descendent of Aro Volturi. Romanov doesn't even go that far back." I said softly. "Just let me explain." He nodded. "About a hundred and fifty years ago, Aro Volturi had two son's Caius and Alec. Just like any leader, Caius would later inherit Aro's position and his name and this angered Alec who had his own thirst for power. He felt that his brother wasn't worthy, that he wouldn't do the best job, but above all else, that he should have been the rightful heir, that his being born second shouldn't have ever been a factor. When he was finished with his education, he had tried to have his brother assassinated so he would have inherited it all, however his efforts were futile because Aro had uncovered his plan and disowned him. Alec was out on his own when he met a Russian by the name of Irina and knowing her status in society, he courted her, realizing that he could use her money and her status for his own revenge. After he married Irina Malinovsky, he took her name and her money and turned against his father and brother.

"Since then they have been in a power struggle, each mob gaining leverage over the other every decade or so. It just happened that Malinovsky was in power in the eighties and your mother was victim to them.

"Your father found out and though you probably don't remember, those last three months weren't exactly the best between them. They fought a lot and the only reason I know this is because the last thing that your father told me was that he wanted me to vow to protect you because he was certain that the Malinovsky family would come after you in the wake of their death."

"They knew they were going to die?" I could see the tears in his eyes and I hated myself for doing this to him, for knowing that I was tearing down everything that he had once known about his mother and tarnishing it for him. If I could have kept it a secret I would have, but that wasn't an option anymore.

"You mother realized what she had done and she tried hard to change her position but she was bound to them and they were strong. It wasn't like she could go to the FBI or the police because they had men there too. They still do. But when the letters started to come I saw the letter head and their symbol is on the letter. I know I should have told you sooner but I wasn't sure it was serious. At least, not until the letter came that said they knew about Bella."

"Why? Why are they still doing this?" He asked and I could hear the anguish in his voice. "She's gone… My father's gone. When I thought it was about James I could understand but what do I have to do with anything? What does Bella have to do with anything?"

I sighed again and looked at him, the tears that I had saw before were now making wet trails against his cheeks and wet puddles on his shirt. "You are your mother's child… I suppose, according to what your father had mentioned, that when your mother knew exactly what would happen if she betrayed them, that they had said they would come after her entire family until punishment and been administered. The only reason why I think it has taken them so long to find you is a mixture of their not knowing what you looked like as your mother rarely let you out into the public eye, presumably because she knew about this, and because for the past fifteen years they have been struggling with the Volturi more so than usual."

"But Bella?"

"They probably know that Bella is important to you."

"So if I break this off with her, do you think they would leave her alone?" His voice was urgent and it broke my heart to know that he would do anything, even if it meant giving up the only shred of happiness that he had ever felt if it meant it would save Bella.

"No. I don't imagine it would make any difference." I sighed. "They know that you know about them now… Or at least, they know you are aware of their knowledge of Bella and I assume they would know you would only break it off with her because you wouldn't want them to do anything to her. If they are as sick as I imagine they are, they would hurt her to hurt you even more."

"So she really is in this situation because of me? Because of my family?" He whispered and I just looked at him. "If I had stuck to my guns and stayed away from her, she would have been safe."

Edward didn't give me the time to respond. Instead he stood up and walked to this room, I presume to be alone though I couldn't help but wonder if maybe I should have waited longer to tell him, at least until things had worked themselves out with Bella. Maybe this was all too much for him to deal with. I had seen the stress that he had been under since the letters had begun to pour in. I just couldn't hold it in any longer knowing that he had to know what was happening, he had to know why so that he wouldn't blame himself as he had been doing for so long.

"Where did he go?" Alice asked as she walked into the room, looking down to notice that Edward was gone.

"Upstairs."

"Is he okay?"

"I don't think so."

"Should I call Bella?"

"I don't think they are talking right now."

"So he told her?" She questioned and I nodded my head.

"She told him that she needed time."

"Well, I'll call her and explain everything… I'll bet she'll be over in an hour." Alice smiled and I nodded, watching as she reached for the phone and dialed the number.

* * *

_**Bella**_

When I got to the Cullen's house, Alice opened the door and pointed to the stairs, not bothering to say anything. There was nothing to be said, everything had already been laid before me and I knew that I had to be there for him. It wasn't that I forgave him for withholding what he knew from me, because I was still angry as hell about that, but I knew that what he had just found out had probably devastated him and I needed to be there for him, to assure him that in the end, we would be okay.

I didn't knock, I knew he was there and when I opened the door I was engulfed into the darkness.

"I said I wasn't hungry." He grumbled and stood there as I allowed my eyes to adjust. He was laying face down on the bed, and though they were weak, I thought I could hear the sound of faint sobs. "I said go away."

"Edward." I spoke softly and I watched him move onto his elbows, his head turning to face me.

"Bella?" He whimpered and I moved closer to the bed, sitting down and moving him so his head was in my lap. "I'm so sorry Bella. I'm so sorry."

"It's okay… It's going to be okay." I whispered, running my fingers though his hair as he cried into my lap.

"My mother… This is all my fault… I never should have brought you into this."

"You didn't know. You would never have known."

"I won't let them hurt you Bella." He said, pulling himself up so that he was looking at me, his hands on both sides of my face, wiping at the tears I hadn't even known were falling. "You are my life Bella. I love you."

"I love you too." I responded before his lips pressed against mine and I comforted him in the only way that I thought I could right now.

* * *

_**Edward**_

I didn't want to believe the words that Carlisle had spoken. All my life they had led me to believe one thing and though she had tried to rectify her actions, I wasn't sure that I could ever forgive my mother for the pain that she was causing me now in her death. It wasn't that I didn't love her, but knowing that had she made a different decision, had she gone about getting her political power the honorable way and done the right thing all along, she and my father would have still been here with me and Bella would have been safe.

I felt something tug on my shirt and when I looked down I saw her laying there, tucked safely into my arms and still wearing the same clothes that she had worn on the plane the other day. I didn't move, afraid to wake her. We had been up quiet late, her holding me as I cried, stroking my hair and finally lulling me to sleep with the sound of her voice as she whispered her love to me. I knew I wasn't forgiven, but I was thankful that she had been there.

The door opened and I watched as Alice peered around, her eyes landing on the bed and Bella before they met my own.

"Everything worked out?" She questioned, arching one of her eyebrows.

"As much as could be expected for now… There's still a lot to talk about." I said quietly though I could feel Bella begin to stir as she rolled onto her other side so her head was resting against my arm.

"We'll figure it all out. We won't let anything happen to either of you. It's going to be okay." She said, a small smile on her face. I wanted to believe her but so much had already been stacked against us and I wasn't sure. "Carlisle has alerted the FBI and I imagine that they'll be here tomorrow to start patrolling.

"What's to say they will stop if we find the one person that they send after me?"

"Because the FBI has been after the Malinovsky mob for decades."

"But we still don't know who they are." I continued leaning over Bella and brushing some of her hair off her face so I could see her face.

"Yes, but I'm pretty certain that as long as they know the FBI are monitoring the house, are monitoring both you and Bella, then I don't think they would do anything if they ran the risk of being exposed."

"And if they do?"

"We'll figure it out."

* * *

I stood outside on the porch looking out into the forest through the rain that was beating down against the ground, occasionally sipping from the pint glass filled with Mac & Jacks that Carlisle had purchased in Port Angeles. Carlisle, Charlie, Emmett and Jasper were in the house watching the game and though they had tried to get me to watch, I couldn't sit still, I thought it would have been better to spend my time surveying the area, making sure that there weren't people lurking in the trees or bushes just waiting to attack.

I hadn't heard the door open so I jumped slightly when I felt something against my shirt. It wasn't until I looked down and saw her small hands around my waist that I allowed myself to melt against her stomach.

"What are you doing?" She asked as I brought my arm up and moved her around so she was standing in front of me, stomach to stomach.

"Just thinking."

She laid her head against my chest and I placed my beer on the railing and stroked her hair absentmindedly with one hand as I continued to look out as far as my eye sight would allow me to.

"I'm not going to tell Charlie… Or Emmett." She whispered before looking up at me, her chin pressed against my shirt.

"I'm not sure that's the best thing to do."

"I am. They'll send me away and I want to be here with you."

"You should go away."

"Then you should too."

I shook my head. "They'll just follow me there and more likely than not, they'll follow you too."

"That's why I'm staying here and not telling them."

It was silent among us again until she spoke. "I'm not saying that I'm still not upset with you but I understand why you didn't tell me…"

I looked down at her. "I didn't want to worry you."

"I know… Alice told me everything and I understand. But you should know that all that time, all those weeks where you went from hot to cold I thought it was because of me… You know everything I went through with Jacob and since then I've had a lot of problems trusting people. I would have preferred that you had told me, trusted me enough to stick by you because I would have…" Her voice trailed off for a moment and I looked down, suddenly unsure as to if she would want to stay with me after this was all sorted.

"No. I will stick by you. You can't keep things from me Edward, regardless of how bad it might be. If it affects you, I'd be willing to bed that it affects me as well."

"I know. It was a terrible decision. It's just each time I wanted to tell you, I couldn't. I couldn't bear the thought that it would scare you off and you wouldn't want to be with me anymore. I would have respected that decision. I wouldn't want to be with me if I were you."

"Stop being so self deprecating Edward." She interrupted. "You tell me that I don't see myself clearly but I think you need to turn the mirror on yourself. You spend all this time worrying about things that are beyond your control. You spend all this time telling yourself that you aren't good enough for me but really… You are so much more than I deserve."

"How can you say that when I'm the reason that your life could be in jeopardy? I was so afraid of this… This was one of the reasons why I was so apprehensive to let you in, even though I couldn't help it because you have taken over my body and soul. I told you from the beginning that I was afraid that someone might come after you." She reached up and placed a finger against my lips, silencing me.

"You did tell me from the beginning and I told you I didn't care. I think you forgot about that. All I want Edward is for you to be honest with me because that's the only way that this will work. You can't shelter me from things that are beyond your control. You need to tell me about them before it gets to be like this."

"I know."

"Promise me that next time… If there ever is a next time, that you will tell me and not hide it away and let it eat you up inside."

"I promise." I murmured against her hair.

* * *

"Are you staying the night?" I asked after Emmett, Rose and Charlie had left.

"I suppose I can."

"It would make me feel better if I knew you were safe." I replied, pulling her tighter against me as we sat on the couch. I looked to the clock and saw that it was already eleven.

"I need to go home and get some clothes."

"I'll go with you."

"Edward, you can't follow me around everywhere." She smiled and kissed my nose.

"That's what you think."

"I'll go home alone and I'll be back in a little bit."

I tightened my grip on her as she began to get up.

"I'll give you something to sleep in. I really, _really_ don't want you going out this late alone."

"I need clothes for tomorrow."

"You can get them tomorrow."

"And what will Charlie say when he sees that I'm wearing your clothes?"

"He'll say, '_atta boy Edward_.'" I chucked, knowing full well that his reaction would be anything but.

"He isn't Carlisle and you know it." She laughed, playfully slapping my arm.

"He won't even be home when I take you back there."

"You aren't ever going to let me out of your sight are you?" She asked and I shook my head. "What about when you have to work?"

"I'll bring you to the hospital and lock you in my office."

"Because that is so safe." She rolled her eyes and I laughed again lightly.

"Please." I pouted and pressed my lips to her neck. "Don't go out it's too late."

She sighed. "Okay but really Edward… I can't be locked up all day and night."

"That's what you think." I mused, inhaling her soft scent.

* * *

**A/N:**

**Okay so everything is out in the open… We know who it is that is after Edward and Bella, or at least, the mobs that are after Edward and Bella. If you have any questions regarding this history of the Malinovsky mob or the Volturi mob I would be more than happy to help explain and clarify. The history is a little murky.**

**Okay… I was slightly disappointed that the last chapter didn't get that many reviews in comparison. You all have spoiled me… With that said… I'm kind of going to do something that I have never done and bribe you to review… I'll give you a preview (for those who don't post anonymously) of what is to come in the next chapter if you send me your thoughts. It's kind of frustrating to have 1,000+ hits per chapter, 300+ alerts and only get 30 reviews… I write for you all and I'd like to know what you like/what you don't like… I want to give you something that you want to read! So keep that in mind. As many of you who always do review know, I always think about what you tell me… I have even used some of your ideas. **

**Anyways, I hope you all had a great weekend. Sorry that it took a little longer to get this one out but it's been a pretty stressful week.**

**Another special thanks to zgirl21 for being an amazing beta. I'm almost done with my brainstorming for the sequel so I'll have the next ideas to you hopefully by the end of the this week!**


	31. Chapter 31

Playlist:  
Snow Patrol: Lifeboats  
Lenka: Live Like You're Dying

* * *

**Baby You Can Stop Running  
Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight.**

**Chapter Thirty One**

_**Bella**_

I could hear the buzzing of Edward's alarm clock in the deepest depths of the room. It was probably closer than it sounded but I was certain that I had never been so exhausted before in my life. And well, though that was a lie, I just knew how I felt in that moment, and that was as though I hadn't slept in days. It was probably the truth, with everything that had been happening since arriving back from San Francisco, things had been rather tense to say the least and though I would never tell him for fear of alarming him, Edward hadn't been the most peaceful in his sleep as of late. He was often tossing and turning which kept me awake making sure that he was okay.

He had told me a few times before about the nightmares that had haunted him. The frightening image of James' eyes when they locked on his in the execution room, the images of blood that although he hadn't witnessed firsthand, he had seen the pictures during the trials; he had said that they were burned into his memory and he knew that no amount of therapy would ever rid him of it. I couldn't blame him really, I had my fair share of nightmares; images of the past that seemed to sneak up on me when my guards were down.

I pulled the pillow over my head, doing everything I could so silence the sound that was coming from the clock so I could stay in my state of sleep. His sleeping had become one of the reasons why I had spent the past week fighting with him about letting my sleep in my own bed. I felt bad, and I assured him that as much as I loved waking up in his arms, I couldn't stand getting up early; something he always had to do for his job. Eight in the morning was just too early for me, I didn't have any place to be and the warm bed was like a cocoon that I could wrap myself in.

"Bella…" His velvety voice filled my ears and I groaned trying to bury myself deeper into the bed thinking that maybe he would just go away and let me sleep.

"Go away." I grumbled and I could hear his soft laugh.

"Wake up." He wrapped his arm around me, pulling me flush against him before nuzzling his face against my neck.

"Why?"

"Because we have to go to the hospital." He spoke as though it was the most normal thing in the world and maybe it was for him, but I wasn't going to go and sit there while he was off at work, not when I could be sleeping.

"You mean, _you_ have to go to the hospital. I can stay here and sleep."

"So do you. I need to keep my eye on you."

"You're going to have to drag me out of this bed because I'm not going anywhere. It's too early and we went to bed too late."

He pulled the blankets off of me and I rolled over, finally opening my eyes and glaring at him, eliciting a laugh from him. "You really thought I wouldn't?"

"Give those back Edward Cullen!"

"No, you are coming to the hospital with me so I know you are okay."

"I'm in your house… I am fine."

"I have a couch you can sleep on."

"Why can't I just stay here?"

"Because Alice and Jasper are going to Seattle to look for an apartment with Esme and Carlisle is going to be at the hospital too. That means that you'll be all alone here and I can't risk that."

"Then take me home. Emmett will be there." I grumbled angry with his protectiveness and the cold that my body was feeling since he had stolen the blankets.

He was shaking his head no and I had a sudden urge to yell at him, to tell him that I was twenty two years old and could take care of myself. "Why?"

"Because the only way that I know that you are actually safe is if you are with me."

"But you'll be with patients so technically you won't be with me so you wouldn't know that I'm okay." I sighed and reached forward to touch his face. To say the past few weeks had been tough would have been an understatement but I did know that if we could survive this, would could survive anything. I hated seeing the guilt that was plastered on his face, the one that told me that he regretted his decision to be with me but I knew it wasn't because he didn't love me but rather because he was afraid that his past would take my future. He was such a pessimist and I knew that I had to be optimistic, I had to show him that we were going to be okay, that everything was going to work out just fine because they had to, we still had so many more thing to experience together and I wasn't ready for it to be done, for everything to be over.

"But I will know where to find you."

"If I'm at home I'm not going to go anywhere. And I have a phone Edward… And you have the number so you can call me whenever and I'll answer it as long as I'm not sleeping."

"Promise?"

"Have I ever broken a promise to you?" I questioned and he shook his head.

"I promise and if it makes you feel better I'll turn the volume on really loudly so that even if I am asleep, it will most likely wake me up."

"I'd appreciate that." He smiled ruefully before placing a kiss on my forehead and pulling the blankets back over me, allowing me to snuggle back into the bed for just a little while longer while he got ready for work. "I'm going to take a shower… Keep resting then."

"Are you going to need clean clothes? I don't want Charlie to get angry with me for bringing you home wearing mine… Not to mention the fact that when he finds out what is going on he is going to murder me for putting you through this, for putting you at risk." He sighed as he paused by the door.

Even though I couldn't see his eyes from my place on the bed, I knew the look that had more likely than not, taken residence back on his beautiful face. Not even bothering to think, I stood up and walked over to him, keeping my eyes trained on his own.

"How will he know?" I asked, moving closer to him and wrapping my arms around his waist. All I wanted to do was comfort him, to be there for him when I knew he needed me, even though I had no idea what I could do for him.

"The FBI will set up headquarters at the police station."

"But that doesn't mean that they are going to tell him what is going on."

"Full disclosure, they'll use the force for extra help."

"Charlie is going to kill you…"

"I know." He sighed and pulled away, glancing only once over his shoulder before heading to the bathroom, leaving me alone, in the dark, with the thoughts that were now swimming through my mind.

_**

* * *

**_

_**Charlie**_

"What's going on here?" I asked as I walked into the department. There were five black, unmarked cars in the parking lot.

"Chief Swan." I watched as a familiar tall boy walked closer to me, extending his hand out to meet my own. I nodded and griped his large hand in a firm handshake. "I'm Sam Uley, Assistant Agent In Charge. We are here investigating a case that was brought to our attention."

"Sam Uley… Josh Uley's son?" I mused as he nodded his head.

"I grew up on the reservation, yes."

"So what's going on?"

"Two weeks ago, we were notified about possible mob activity in Forks."

"Mob activity?"

"The Malinovsky family have a vendetta against Edward Masen and have located him here in Forks."

I couldn't place the last name. "Masen?"

"Cullen. He was adopted, he goes by Edward Cullen now."

"He's a surgeon at the hospital here… Saved my life." I commented and watched as Sam merely nodded, his eyes not leaving the file that he held in his hand.

"I see… Anyways, the FBI has been after the Malinovsky's for a long time now… We are hoping that we are going to put an end to this all now."

"If you don't mind me asking… What do they want with Edward?"

Sam tossed the file down on the desk. My desk, which he apparently had taken over. "His mother got involved in some shady politics back when she was a Senator and when she tried to back out, they had to eliminate her. They never found her son and have been looking for him. About four months ago they caught wind that he was in Washington and found him working at the hospital…"

"But what did he have to do with his mother's politics. He was merely a boy."

"It's how they work. They kill anyone even remotely close to the member."

"My daughter… She's dating Edward."

"Isabella?" He asked and I nodded. "Yea, they know about her too…"

* * *

_**Bella**_

I could hear the cruiser as it pulled into the driveway and I knew that Charlie was home. I also had one of those sneaky suspicions that he wasn't going to be in a good mood. It was barely four in the afternoon and he was already home. He _never_ came home that early and I knew that it could only be because of one thing. Edward's secret was out… My secret was out…

The door slammed with a ferocity that almost scared me, a few of the pictures on the wall rattled and I was surprised that they hadn't fallen and crashed to the floor. Though I didn't want to, I watched as Charlie walked into the room. He hadn't bothered to remove his belt and hang his gun, something he always did before coming into the house, always saying it was for safety precautions. I knew instantly from the expression on his face that he knew, that he had figured it all out, that the one thing I wanted to keep from him was now completely out in the open and I was afraid. I knew what his reaction would be like and I wouldn't be able to bear it.

With everything that he had been through, I wasn't even certain that his heart would have been up for the stress. Sure they had said that the heart attack in the hospital had been due to the stress on his body from the shooting but what if he was just over worked and over stressed? What if this news had the same effect? I didn't want him to worry and I didn't want him to blame Edward. But I knew that if he did know, that that was exactly what was going to happen, he was going to worry and he was going to blame Edward, even though this was all out of his control. How could he help it if some crazy mob was after him because of a decision that his mother had made in her past? How could someone hold that against him? It was bad enough that he held it against himself.

Charlie just stood there looking down at me from my position on the couch, both of us not willing to say the first word. I knew that he only wanted confirmation and I was too busy trying to find a way to calm him when the words were finally uttered. I looked him in the eyes and I saw everything I never wanted to see; the anger, confusion and betrayal that was written across his face and I wanted nothing more than to bury my head in the pillow to escape the questions that he was about to shoot at me. I felt like an innocent victim, accused of murder and about to face the firing squad. I knew in the deepest depths of me, that there would be nothing I could do to convince him that everything was going to be okay, he had seen too much in his lifetime and had been through so much recently that I was certain that he would do anything to keep me away from Edward from this point on. I would have to convince him that I was safer with him than I was away from him. A thought that was more a truth than a lie.

"Bella… Is there something you haven't told me about?" He asked as he hovered above the couch trying to make contact with my eyes.

"No."

"So there is a federal car staked outside the house for no reason at all?" I sat up so I could see out the window and sure enough, a black car was parked across the street. It hadn't been there an hour ago and there wasn't anyone in this town that drove anything that resembled it. So much for being discrete.

"Exactly."

"I'm not an idiot Bella and I know when you are lying." He sighed. "You thought I wouldn't figure it out? You do realize that I'm the police chief here right? You know that they came to the station to set up headquarters."

"I know I should have told you but I didn't want you to worry…"

"I'm going to kill that boy." He bellowed and I jumped onto my feet and made my way around the couch so I was standing in front of him, my hand placed firmly on my hips.

"No dad, you aren't."

"And give me one good reason why I shouldn't?"

"Because he can't control the past! Because this isn't his fault! Because no one could have ever seen this coming!"

"He knew about his past Bella, he told me about his past but I thought he was just muttering some random bull shit. And here it is, it's come to life and they are after not only him but you too! He put you in this position."

"No. He told me about his past before I made the decision to be with him. I've known the consequences all along but I didn't care and I still don't care. I want to be with him and he needs me right now and I need him."

"No. You need to go to Florida and live with Renee for a while." I shook my head and I could see how Charlie was stiffening, how uncomfortable this conversation was making him.

"I'm safer here with him then I am off on my own."

"Bella stop being so naïve! You have no idea what it is you are up against! For Christ sake, stop acting like a child!"

"A CHILD!" I was yelling, ready to put him in his place, unhappy that he couldn't just respect my wishes and what knowledge I knew. I didn't know what the FBI had told him, but I did know that I was better off here than alone. That if I was alone they would continue to seek me out and if this was going to be settled, it had to be settled here, with the two of us together, not apart. "You have no idea what I've been dealing with for the past two weeks! And I didn't tell you because I knew you would react like this!"

"He isn't good enough for you Bella. He's troubled."

"Aren't we all?"

"Not like him! He's putting your life in danger!"

"No. You don't get to chose who I spend my time with. You loved Jacob dad, and look what he did to me! He left me and anything could have happened when I was pregnant and he didn't care! He could have easily gotten in touch with me if he really wanted to, he _knew_ what I was going through but he stayed away. Edward is here for me Dad… He is doing everything he can to make sure that I'm okay and you want me to leave? No. I won't do that."

"You aren't staying here Bella."

"Fine. Then I'll pack my things up and go to the Cullen's."

"Bella, I called your mother… She is expecting you in Jacksonville tomorrow. At least until this all passes… I can't have you here in this town. It's too small and they'll find you."

"What about Edward?" I demanded, angry that he had made this decision without even consulting me first.

"He will be fine."

"How can you be so hypocritical?"

"Because Edward isn't my daughter." I rolled my eyes.

"Well you can tell mom that I'm not going. If Edward is staying so am I."

"Bella, you aren't staying, your brother and I already agreed to this. You will get on that plane tomorrow even if I have to drug you first."

I didn't stay to hear what else he had to say. I was out the door and in my car, Charlie's shouts were a distant sound in the background, I was trying to figure out what I was going to do. But I knew what I wouldn't be doing. I wasn't going to go to Jacksonville. I wasn't going to leave Edward alone. I was going to stay.

* * *

**A/N:**

**First off… I apologize for how long this has taken to get out… I've been really busy and this week doesn't look much easier… I have to write my personal statement for grad school to get to my English professor who is writing a letter of recommendation for me… I have a creative writing assignment due on Friday… And two papers due on Monday… So it's going to be a bit hectic. **

**I also apologize for the short length… It's the shortest chapter I've posted in a while, but I wasn't sure what I wanted to write and when I figured it out I was running out of time… I'm not exactly pleased with it… But I think the drama is starting to set in… Charlie knows now, Emmett knows (well, it's implied that Emmett knows) and soon, someone is about to show up… I'd give the story about five to seven chapters before it's finished. Then it's off to the sequel which is already in the works…**

**Sooo… One more question: with the busyness of my week I offer you two options: shorter, more frequent chapter or longer, less frequent chapters… the choice is yours!**

**Another note: I'm writing another story… I've got about one chapter on my processor and it's based on the one-shot "Dimes" that I posted earlier in the week. It's going to go through the whole story instead of just the few shots that I gave in the short story. I plan to post it this week… It's going to be called "You Found Me" so please keep a look out for that! It's going to be different than this story, much less dramatic in the sense of a big bad… More fluffy… And I'd LOVE LOVE LOVE you if you checked it out!**

**As always, review and I'll send you a preview of the next chapter!!!**

**And a great big thanks to everyone who is reviewing, and those who continue to add this story to your alerts/favorites! I love you all! You inspire me to continue writing this! I hope you are all excited about where this is going… And about the upcoming sequel (which will be called Thinking Of You).**


	32. Chapter 32

**Baby You Can Stop Running  
Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight**

**Chapter Thirty Two**

_**Edward**_

I stood by the window watching the rain as it pelted violently against the glass and the clouds told a tale of thunder and lightning that threatened to strike at any minute. I couldn't keep myself from looking, knowing that even if there was something out there, there was nothing I could do about it. They were there; the authorities would take care of it. Still, I had a desire to protect Bella, knowing that she was only a few feet away. If anything were to happen to her…

I let my eyes fall upon the unmarked car parked outside where I could see the agent shift around in his seat; undoubtedly he was surveying the area once again. Squinting, I could see another agent perched in a tree, a green tarp shielding him from the elements and I wanted to bring something out to him to make sure he was warm, or at the most, decently comfortable. I owed these men everything, they were keeping my family and my Bella safe, though still I couldn't help but feel that this wouldn't be enough. If these people really wanted to get to me, they would find a way. I just hoped if that were to be the case, they would get to me before they could get to Bella.

"No. I won't go," Bella mumbled for what I thought must have been the tenth time since she had fallen asleep. I turned from my place near the window and let my eyes fall upon her sleeping frame on my large bed. My lip twitched as I moved closer, pulling into a slightly frown. My weight fell onto the mattress and I watched as she moved on the pillow, snuggling her head deeper into it, her long, chocolate hair scattered against the white pillow like a halo. She continued to mummer and I reached forward and tangled my hand in her hair, every now and then running my fingers against her temple.

"_Dr. Cullen, there is a woman at the nurses' station asking to speak to you. She seems a little troubled." Janie said as she walked into the empty room that I was taking some refuge in. I had been working non-stop since stepping foot into the hospital and I still have five hours left on my shift. I suppose that's what you get when your personal life falls apart and you have to take so much time off to fix it. _

"_Who is it?" I asked. I didn't want to go out there if it was just Alice. Alice could wait, I just needed a break._

"_Miss. Swan." _

"_Is she okay? She isn't hurt is she?"_

"_I don't think so but she is upset." Janie replied and I nodded, following her out to the nurses' station where Bella was leaning against the counter, her head buried in her hands and I could see her back shaking from what were probably the silent sobs she was crying._

"_Bella?" She turned around and I saw her tear streaked face, her eyes puffy and red. "Bella, what's wrong?"_

"_I-I left," she replied as I pulled her into my arms just as Carlisle walked by, stopping a few feet away to observe._

"_Left where?"_

"_Charlie…" I could feel her tears as they began to soak through the fabric of my scrubs but I wasn't concentrating on that, I had to calm her down so I pulled her tighter against me, feeling every inch of her body against my own. "He wanted me to go… To leave but I can't. I won't."_

"_Shhh…" I whispered, my hand rubbing small circles on her back as I felt her deep breaths to calm the sobs that had rocked her body. _

"_I won't go. I won't leave you," she said over and over again while she gripped my waist tighter as though she was afraid if she let go I would be gone. There was nothing I could do so I just held her, rubbing small circles on her back while resting my chin on the crown of her head, allowing me to breath in the scent of her shampoo._

"_I know Bella… I know." I locked eyes with my adoptive father who nodded with understanding. I couldn't be at work, Bella needed me and it was the least I could do for her. It would be another week where I would spend only a few hours at the hospital, but somehow, I didn't care. I didn't care about any of it, all I wanted was to be with Bella and to make sure she was okay. She needed me more than the hospital needed me right now._

"_Edward, your shift is up. You should take Bella to the house." _

I had taken her home immediately where she proceeded to hang on to me, her arms wrapped tightly around my neck as we laid in bed. Her tears subsided however as she began to fall asleep, exhausted after having exerted so much energy crying but I continued to hold her until the rain had started.

This hadn't been the life that I had signed up for, and I was certain that this wasn't what she had signed up for either when she had agreed to be with me and yet here she was, sticking beside me and neglecting everything else that she had going for her in her life. The guilt that racked my mind was intense, I was taking her from the family that she was only being reunited with and I knew there was no way that Charlie or Emmett would ever be able to forgive me for that. If I was in their position, it would take all the strength in me to not get a gun and hunt down the man stealing my daughter from me. There were the two people who had been patiently waiting for her to return for four years and instead of keeping her, I was ripping it all apart for them.

I felt sick that this was happening, and sick that there was nothing I could do about it. I was too selfish to give her up. I needed her to survive now. She was the only thing keeping me hanging on.

The door creaked as it opened and I looked up from where I was sitting to see Alice standing with half her body in the room.

"Edward?" She said softly and I looked up to meet her eyes. "Agent Uley is here."

"Does he want to see Bella too?"

"No… But Chief Swan does."

"Chief Swan is here?"

She nodded and I groaned. He was going to kill me.

* * *

Chief Swan was standing by the couch, his body stiff and when his eyes locked with mine, I was finally aware of what it meant when someone said 'if looks could kill.' His eyes were dark with a rage that he was trying hard to conceal and the only reason that I knew that, was because I knew the look so well. It was the same look that I so often saw when I looked in the mirror when my thoughts drifted to the people who were trying to rip apart my life, the people who were trying to harm the most innocent and most perfect thing in my life.

The tension in the room was palpable and I knew the look on my face showed my desperation. I wanted nothing more than for all this to be over and for my life and my life with Bella to move forward. I fell onto the couch, sinking down into the cushions and leaning my head back against the pillows before pinching the bridge of my nose. There were so many questions I wanted to ask but I wasn't sure where to start or if I wanted to know, but the look on Sam Uley's face showed me that there was something that was happening and it was something that everyone in that room needed to know.

"What's the news?" My voice came easier than I had anticipated under the scrutiny.

"I'm afraid it's not good, but it's not exactly bad either." He started and I raised my eyebrows. "We've linked a Mr. Laurent DuBois and a Mr. Riley Hartson to the area who have an obscure connection to the Malinovsky's."

"So they have been apprehended?"

"No… We traced them to a house not far out of town but when we searched the place there was nothing there. We think that somehow they caught wind of our presence and moved out."

"So they're gone?" I asked, leaning forward, my arms on my lap, supporting my upper body.

"I can't answer that. We've put out a report for police in Kitsup, Pierce and King Counties to be on the lookout, just in case."

"What are the chances of finding them?" I heard Carlisle ask and I looked over to see his arm around Esme, his hand rubbing circles against her arm in an attempt to sooth the fears that I knew she was feeling as well. I had been so wrapped up in all this that I often found myself forgetting that this was happening to others too. True they were no after them, they were after me, they were after Bella, and I knew that they were feeling the pain as well. It was just different and with everything that was on my plate, I had pushed their feelings to the wayside.

"I don't know… D.C. headquarters have been in touch with Illinois and New York and they are doing all they can to round up as many of the Malinovsky's as they can but it's much more difficult than it seems. Those that they have found won't talk for fear that if they are released that they will pay the price."

"What if we put them in witness protection?" Carlisle continued to press.

"It's pointless. I'd like to say that the FBI is impenetrable but we all know that's not the case. The Malinovsky's have been around far too long and have their hands in every government operation that exists: CIA, NSA, FBI…"

"So this is never going to end?" I sighed.

"I can end… We need to find who it is that is after you now… Then we'll see if there is something we can offer the family, something that will get them away from you and from Bella…"

"Like what? What could they possibly want? And doesn't that go against the purpose of the law?"

"The point of the law is to protect the citizens… Sometimes, there are different things we have to do to go about making sure that is the ultimate outcome."

"But you want to take down the Malinovsky's," I countered. I still had no idea what it was they were planning on doing, how they were planning on doing it, or even if it would work. It just didn't seem plausible.

"Everyone has a price and right now, the ultimate goal is making sure that you are okay… Money for the Malinovsky's and the Volturi is what matters, money dictates power but ultimately, money is traceable and eventually we are certain that we will find a way to get to them successfully without a high cost."

"It doesn't seem plausible."

"It never does when you are so close to the situation. If you were to remove yourself from it, I think it might make more sense. Either way… When this is all over, we will move you and Bella to a secure location and will guarantee protection, just in case. It's always easier to thwart something that is just starting than when it is in a full blown attack."

"So witness protection is out of the picture?" Esme prodded and Sam nodded his head.

"I take it Bella is here, at the house?" Sam questioned and I nodded.

"Where's my daughter?" Charlie asked, and I looked up to find him standing only a few feet away from me.

"Sleeping upstairs… She exhausted herself."

"I don't want her here. I want her out of the state."

"Charlie, as an agent, I have to advise you against making that decision." Sam interrupted and I was thankful that he had. "We can keep an eye on her here and more than anything, they will probably follow her there and there won't be anyone to protect her there. I know it's hard to take as a father, but I'm fairly certain that Edward would die to protect her if it came down to it, which I promise it won't."

Charlie grunted something that was incomprehensible and I looked towards the stairs. I could wake her up, I could show him that she was safe, but I would never have his trust ever again and in that moment I could taste the salty iron flavor as tiny drops of blood tickled my taste buds from the vicious manner at which I had been attacking the sides of my cheeks with my molars.

"Chief Swan…" I began after I ran my tongue over the mangled patch of the inside of my mouth, "if I could change this, if I could go back and make it so that Bella was never in this position I would do it in a heartbeat."

"So get the hell out of town," he glowered.

"I can't leave her." I hung my head with my confession. "If I could I would but I can't physically detach myself from her. I am so sorry but I would never want to take her away from you… I know, better than most, what she's been through and what you've been through and I'm sorry that this is coming at this time… I just want you to know that I care about her, that I love her, and that I'll never let anything happen to her. I won't be like _him_."

"I suggest you leave him out of it. I just want to see my daughter…"

I nodded, he was upset and he had every right to it. Who was I to keep him from her? If I did, then I was no better than Jacob. I would have been exactly like him.

* * *

My hands stilled over the ivory colored keys of my piano when I heard the footsteps in the hall. Though I knew that it couldn't be anyone but my family or Bella, my heart still raced with the thoughts of someone else, of an intruder. I hated the edge that I was on, the constant state of panic that seemed to course through my veins and body. I wanted to be relaxed; I wanted to go back to the easy days of the beginning of my relationship with her. The days when I was genuinely happy, before I thought much of the threats. I wanted to go back to San Francisco, to the days before Alice had called and told me that they knew about my sweet Bella.

"Edward?" Her voice broke through the silence like bells and I looked up to see her standing there, clad in my boxers and an old undershirt. I was gnawing on my cheek again.

"Are you angry with me?" She asked, keeping her distance.

"Why would you think that?"

"Ever since Charlie spoke with me… You've been distant and then I woke to find you gone."

"I'm sorry…" I replied, before lifting my hand and beckoning her. She walked slowly and when she was standing by the bench, I wrapped my arm around her waist and pulled her down so she was sitting next to me.

"I couldn't sleep and you were sleeping so soundly I didn't want to bother you with my tossing and turning because I couldn't sleep." I buried my head in the crook of her neck, smelling the sweet scent of lavender against her skin.

"So you aren't upset with me?"

"Bella I could never be upset with you…"

We sat there, in the silence as she ran her fingers through my hair. I didn't want the moment to end, just wanting to make this last forever, for everything to be good and calm and pleasant.

"Don't ever do that again… Leave and not tell me. I didn't like waking up and not knowing where you were." She finally broke the silence, pulling away from me so that her eyes met my own so I could see just how serious she was about it.

"I won't."

* * *

_**Bella**_

Three days and still no word of what was happening, no word as to when life could continue to move forward and I was getting cabin fever. The Cullen's house was large, and that was putting it in modest terms, but being cooped up in a house wasn't something that I had ever enjoyed. Christmas was merely a few days away and I hadn't been able to get anyone presents because Edward wouldn't let me leave the house. I couldn't blame him exactly, I knew how dangerous it was to leave but I just wanted him to see that I couldn't stand it anymore. My thoughts shifted to Charlie, to how angry he was.

"_Why are you doing this Bella?" _

"_Because he needs me and I can't leave him… It won't do anyone any good and I'm so much better off staying here… I'm safe here."_

"_You aren't safe anywhere… I want to get you out of the country, to get you as far away from here as possible."_

"_What about what I want dad?" I asked, looking down at my hands._

"_What does that mean?"_

"_It means that I don't want to go," I replied softly and I felt his weight on the edge of the bed as he sat down. I looked up and met his eyes. "I'm not going anywhere… I'm not leaving you, I'm not leaving Emmett and I'm certainly not leaving Edward. I know how crazy this is going to sound amongst all this but even though I'm scared about what is happening, I've never been so happy dad… I have you and Emmett again and I found someone I love and who loves me enough to die for me… Not that I want that, or that I will let it come to that because it's not… We're going to get through this and life is going to keep going and we are all going to move forward together."_

_He was shaking his head at me, "Bella that's naïve… You don't know that everything is going to be okay, you can never know that something is going to turn out favorably."_

"_I do… Just… Trust me. I'm not going anywhere."_

"_I just…"_

"_Don't blame him dad… He didn't know… All of this… It's new for each and every single one of us. And, as much as you think this is hard for you and for me… Imagine if you woke up one day to find out that your mom wasn't the person you thought she was…" I reached forward to place my hand on Charlie's. We weren't an affectionate family, he always shied away from anything resembling emotion but for some reason, it felt like the right thing to do. "He needs to know that this isn't his fault and you aren't making this any easier… Don't make me chose between the two of you… Please… Don't you owe him a chance?"_

"_I don't see what I owe him after this." He grunted and I pulled my hand away, suddenly angry._

"_He saved your life… If only for that, he deserves a second chance…"_

"_I'll think about it."_

"_I guess that's all I have to say to you then…"_

Outside the rain was still pouring and I looked towards the fire that Edward had started before he went to take a shower. Being cooped up would have been much more difficult if he hadn't been around and I was thankful that Carlisle had allowed Edward time off, though it didn't seem like he had any other option. Just as I knew it wasn't safe for me to be out, it was equally, if not even more, unsafe for Edward to be walking around alone outside.

I couldn't help but chuckle. Forks was never a place where anyone would think it would be unsafe to walk around alone. And yet, here we were, unable to enter the world outside for fear that something would go horribly wrong. It was amazing what could change over four years.

My fingers touched the leather cover the Esme's old, first edition of _Pride and Prejudice_ and I willed my mind to settle so I could focus on the words.

"How are you holding up?" I felt the cushion next to me move and I looked to the side to see Alice sitting there.

"Best as I can I suppose… I wish I could say the same for your brother," I shrugged.

"Yeah, he has been a little moody lately."

"It's hard to be angry with him about it… You should cut him some slack, he's going through a lot and even though I've told him numerous times that I'm not upset with him for all this he doesn't seem to understand. I just wish that he would let me out of this house… I'm feeling claustrophobic which seems blasphemous in a house this large."

"He hasn't really had anyone in his life like you Bella… He doesn't know how to react to something like this."

"I know…"

"No… Let me finish… I've been wanting to talk to you for awhile but he's been hogging you," she chuckled which caused me to smile back at her. "There have been girls in his life but you are the first person that he has ever gotten close to, besides mom, dad and I… I know how smothered you feel right now but he doesn't know anything other than this… It's the only way that he feels he can keep you safe. He feels so bad for everything…"

"I know… Trust me."

"I just want you to know… That before all this happened, before shit hit the fan, I'd never seen him so damn happy. You changed him for the best and I'm thankful for that…"

"We'll… He's changed me too and I'll always feel indebted to him. If it wasn't for him I'm pretty sure I would have gone back to California as soon as Charlie recuperated."

"What are you talking about?" I turned and smiled when I saw him walking into the room and he smiled back.

"Nothing." Alice replied and he lifted his eyebrows with suspicion.

"So… I've been a little bit like a prison ward lately and I'm sorry," he said as he sat down next to me, pulling me tightly into his side. "Alice has talked me into letting you go with her to go shopping… There will be an agent with you both and I can't imagine that anyone would try something in a crowded mall…"

I wasn't sure if I wanted to kiss or kill him. I was thankful for the opportunity to get out of the house but shopping wasn't something that I wanted to do, especially if the stories about Alice's shopping habits were true.

"I promise I will go easy on you." Alice grinned.

"You knew about this all along didn't you?" I asked and she nodded enthusiastically. "I don't really have a choice then do I?"

"No." She grinned and I turned into Edward's side, tucking myself into him.

"Now that I'm telling you that you can go out, you are snuggling up against me?" He laughed and I nearly cried. It had been so long since he had been so light, since his tone had been so worry free and calm and for some many reasons I suddenly _wanted_ to stay with him, to revel in the happy, calm Edward that was before me. It was this person that I missed the most and had been waiting for.

"I don't want to go shopping." I whined and he dropped a kiss to my head.

"Go… You should get out of the house… I was being a little bit too over protective," He said softly before I felt his warm breath against my ear sending delicious chills down my spine. "I just wanted to keep you safe because I don't want to lose you."

"What are you going to do while we are out?"

"Don't you worry about that."

"But you will be back when we do?"

"I will." He replied with a soft smile.

"Alright… Lead the way Alice." I relented, savoring the goodbye kiss that he had placed against my lips before allowing her to drag me out to her car and to an uncertain destiny.

**A/N:**

**I know, I know I said I would send previews but with everything going on I want to say I am so so sorry that I didn't get around to it… BUT I WILL SEND A PREVIEW OF THE NEXT CHAPTER! As for updates in the future… Things are really, really busy for me right now with me applying to grad schools and with school work but as soon as Spring Break rolls around, I'm thinking things will let up a bit! Which is good because I want to end this story and get a move on with the next one!**

**Now… This WAS ready on Sunday, but fanfiction has been a pain in the ass… As you probably know… **

**So, I know it's a short chapter but for some reason I can't bring myself to add more… Nevertheless… Things are going to get intense from here on out… **

**Lil-Mz-Sunshine: I love long reviews! Thank you for your kind words!**

**Insane Bliss: I'm so glad to hear that you followed me from my Buffy stories! Thank you for your review! And I'm so glad that you like it!**

**ALSO!**

**I have another story that I'm working on… It's much different than this one… Angsty and fluffy… So please check it out and let me know what you think… It's called **_**You Found Me**_** and I'll be posting chapter five hopefully tomorrow!**

**Please review! It's better than a day of sunshine in Washington!**


	33. Chapter 33

Note... The beginning takes place three days before the end of Chapter 32... Bella's POV takes place where Chapter 32 left off.

**Baby You Can Stop Running  
Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight**

**Chapter Thirty Three**

_**Edward – Three Days Before**_

"Carlisle…" I ran a hand through my hair while I knocked on his office door with the other.

"Come in."He was sitting at his desk and was shuffling through a few papers. "You know you don't have to knock."

I nodded and flopped down into one of the large, dark brown leather chairs in the room. "What are you looking at?"

"There's a patient and we are just having some problems diagnosing her."

"Can I see?"

He shrugged and tossed the file towards me.

"We thought it was Lyme disease but the tests were negative."

"Fibromyalgia?" Carlisle shook his head. "Any kind of rash?"

"No."

"Lupus?"

Carlisle cocked his head to the side. "I never thought of that."

I just shrugged. "There was a girl I went to med school with who had it."

"I'll have the staff look into that… Thank you." I put the file back on the desk and thought about inquiring about other patients but thought the better of it and just nodded.

A few moments of silence passed between the two of us before I gathered the strength to tell him what it was that had brought me to his office in the first place. "I'm going crazy here Carlisle… I need to get out of here."

"You can't… You know that," he sighed as he leaned back in his chair.

"Just… An hour a week at the hospital… Something. Anything."

"I know you aren't use to being locked up but you know there isn't anything you can do. If you go to the hospital you are putting yourself and the patients in jeopardy."

I pulled at my hair again. "I just need something to take my mind off of all this… I can't keep pretending that this is going to be okay… I can't keep acting like it's not happening."

"I know son… But Sam said they had a lead…"

"Fuck Sam always thinks he has a lead and it doesn't go anywhere… I'm the only one that can make this end…"

"Edward… What about Bella?"

"What about her?"

"If something happens…"

"Don't you get it? I can't have a future with her unless something changes! I can't keep sitting here waiting for things to change when I'm the only one who can make it happen."

"You need to think about this before you act on it."

"It's all I've been thinking about."

"Then you have to tell Bella."

"That will kill her."

"If you are going to sacrifice yourself, you have to tell her what is happening. She has the right to know."

"If I tell her then I won't go through with it."

"That's kind of what I'm hoping."

I sunk further into the chair. I hated everything in that moment. I had thought that I had come to accept it. That I had accepted what my parents had done and my fate but the more I was there in that house. The more I was left to my thoughts the more I hated and resented everything. I wanted a future with Bella more than anything else in the world and the more time that passed, the more I was beginning to see how little the chances of that happening were. My mother might have been dead and yes, I would always love her, but I wasn't sure I would ever forgive her for leaving me with this mess.

"I have to do it…" I whispered as I looked at the wall. I wanted to meet Carlisle's eyes. I wanted to look at him and show him that I knew I was doing the right thing, that I was man enough to face my problems head on instead of hiding from them. But as much as I wanted to, I couldn't find the strength to turn my head because I knew what I would see: the terror that I was certain any father would feel knowing that his son was making a decision that could ultimately lead to his death.

"There really isn't anything I can do to change your mind is there?" He was quiet and I looked up and saw that he had his head in his hands.

"No."

_**Bella**_

I didn't want to go. You know that feeling deep down when you know something is wrong? When you leave the house and you can't remember if you unplugged the curling iron… That's the feeling that I had as I let Alice drag me away from the house and from Edward's arms. It was the look on his face as though he might be looking at me for the last time and he just wanted to take it in. It was fleeting, probably only gracing his beautiful face for a few moments but it was long enough to tell me that something was different, that something was about to change.

I wanted to run to him, to wrap my arms around his neck and never let go, mainly for fear of what it was that was coming. I wanted to tell him that I loved him and that I wanted nothing more than to be with him for the rest of my life. But I didn't do that, I let Alice drag me by the arm as I looked at him over my shoulder, tripping every so often because I refused to look where I was walking. I wanted to drink him in, to preserve him in my memory for fear that I would never see him again. The fear, the dread, all of it, was a feeling that I wouldn't wish on my worst enemy.

If Alice was talking, I couldn't be sure because I wasn't focused on anything. I couldn't. I was too concerned, too worried. But maybe she didn't know why… Maybe she just knew how much I hated shopping, how much I would have rather been with her brother.

"_Bella?" I groaned and snuggled my cheek against his chest as he wrapped his arms around me. I was in too much of a sleep induced haze to really think much so I concentrated on the way things felt. His chest, warm and hard against my cheek._

"_Are you asleep?" I shook my head and felt as his hand ghosted up my bare back and smoothed out the long strands of my hair. "I love you Bella… Nothing will ever change that."_

"_What do you mean?" I mumbled against his chest before angling my head so I could meet his eyes. _

"_I just love you…" He replied, leaning down and placing a kiss to my forehead._

"_I love you too." _

I should have heard it in his voice but I didn't. He was saying goodbye. Just in case.

My phone buzzed in my hands breaking me from my thoughts and I looked down to see it was a text message from Edward.

_I love you… Forever._

I glanced over at Alice. Her hands were gripping the steering wheel and she chewed on her lower lip as she looked out the windshield. It was in that moment that I knew.

"I need to go back Alice." She shook her head but continued her assault on her lower lip. "I have to go back."

"I can't let you Bella…"

"It's your brother Alice."

"I promised him I'd make sure you were safe… Jasper is meeting us in Port Angeles… We'll go to Seattle for a few days before we hear from Edward."

"You mean _if_ we hear from Edward." I was angry. He had no right to make this decision and to leave me out of the plan. I knew how restless he was getting; there had been countless amounts of times that I had heard him complaining to Carlisle and to Sam about being held captive in his own home and how he was sick of hiding. But it didn't matter. He should have told me. This wasn't just his life anymore… It was mine… He was my life. Anything that affect him, anything that would take him from me, would affect me as well.

I began to text furiously.

_Don't you dare do anything stupid!_

I looked out the window as I waited for his response. My heart was beating wildly in my chest as I tried to take deep breaths to steady it but it didn't seem to work. I felt something nudge my shoulder and I looked to see Alice's hand containing a bottle and I just looked at it.

"Take one Bella… Please… It will calm you down."

I took the bottle. Xanax. And Edward was the prescribing doctor. He wanted her to fucking sedate me.

"I'm not taking that."

"Please… He just…"

"He had no right… You had no right. This isn't just his life Alice… He is my life and he's taking himself away from me. What does he think will happen if he doesn't come through?" The phone buzzed again.

_Just tell me you love me Bella… I need to know that._

_You know I love you. But if you get yourself killed I'll hate you forever._ I was about to press send.

"Don't tell him that," Alice interrupted and I looked over my shoulder at her. "Don't Bella…"

"Why shouldn't I Alice? He didn't tell me."

"Because he's doing what he has to do."

"By leaving me?"

"You don't know that he is leaving you."

I pressed send anyways and I heard Alice groan when I did. I could chalk it up to being angry later. Then again… Would there be a later?

"I told you not to do it." I scowled at her words.

"I hate you," I grumbled and flipped the phone over and over in my hands. This wasn't how I was expecting my day to go. I bit my lip and looked out the window. "Why did he do this Alice?"

"Because he wanted something better for both of you. You know as well as I do that you both can't have a future unless you this past is fixed."

I looked back down at the phone and watched as a tear hit the screen, falling just to the left of his name.

_I love you… Don't forget that. You have every right to be angry. Be safe please… I'll call you as soon as I can._

_You be safe… Please come back to me._

There was nothing else to say. Nothing I could to do change what he had already set into motion. The tears came easily, but it was the pain that I hated the most. I hadn't felt that scared and that alone since I gave birth in California all those years ago.

So I welcomed the pain because there was no way I could run from it. I just could only hope that it would turn out better this time. I could only hope that he would come back to me and that he would be okay because if he didn't, I wasn't sure I could find the strength to go on.

_**Edward**_

I ran into the house and began tossing clothes into a bag after Alice's car had disappeared around the corner. I couldn't waste time. The sooner that this happened, the sooner I could hopefully get back to my life, to Bella. I just wanted to fix everything and I just hoped that I could do that and stay alive. There was still so much more that I wanted to do with my life.

The look in her eyes as she was being dragged off by Alice was enough to tell me that Bella knew. I had hoped that she wouldn't. I didn't want to see the look in her eyes, the heartbreak. But it was there and all the while I kept yelling at her in my head, wishing that she could read my mind. _I'll be back… We'll be together… I love you… Please forgive me…_

I looked at my phone. _I love you… Forever._ It was all I could tell her, but it was everything she needed to know. I was certain she had figured it out, but she had to know that it was all for her.

"_Alice," I said as I poked my head into her room. She was on her computer and I noticed that she was still looking for apartments._

"_What's up?" She asked, looking up from the laptop that was resting on her knees._

"_You need to take Bella tomorrow… Take her to Seattle, and take Jasper with you."_

"_What's going on?"_

"_I'm going to fix this…"_

"_Edward?"_

"_I'm not changing my mind," I replied as I began to back out the door._

"_I know. Just… Be careful?" _

"_You know I will be… There's too much at stake."_

The familiar beep of a new message pulled me from my thoughts and I looked down at the screen.

_Don't you dare do anything stupid!_

I pinched the bridge of my nose before responding.

_Just tell me you love me Bella… I need to know that._

"Edward… Are you ready?" I pressed send and looked up to see Charlie standing at the door.

"As ready as I'm going to be."

"Sam is downstairs… He wants to go over protocol." I nodded. "Thank you… For sending Bella away."

"I couldn't let her stay here."

"Just… Thank you."

My phone beeped again as Charlie placed his hand on my shoulder. It wasn't forgiveness… Not yet. But it was comfort and I took it. I wanted Bella but right now, her father would be enough.

_You know I love you. But if you get yourself killed, I'll hate you forever._

"You didn't tell her?" I shook my head and closed my eyes trying to keep the tears from escaping. "You know she doesn't mean it right?"

I nodded. "She's upset."

"You did the right thing Edward."

"I know."

"She'll forgive you."

"I hope so," I replied before typing my last message.

_I love you… Don't forget that. You have every right to be angry. Be safe please… I'll call you as soon as I can._

Her response was nearly immediate and I knew what I had to do.

_You be safe… Please come back to me._

Charlie left me in the room for a few moments to compose myself. _I'll come back to you Bella. I love you too much to leave you behind.  
_

_**Bella**_

The city was dark and I stood by the large window and gazed outside. We had been in Seattle for six hours and there had still been no word from Edward. Alice continued to press the notion that not hearing from him was good… That he was fine and he would come back to me, to all of us. But as much as I wanted to believe her, I wasn't as certain. I was too afraid.

"You should go to bed." I turned to see Alice standing at the door to my bedroom. She had insisted on the suite saying that because we could be there for awhile it was better to have more room. I was too tired to argue.

I nodded and she just continued to stand there. "I know Bella… I know how hard it is."

"What would you do? What would you do if Jasper just left you to do what he thought was right without asking?"

"I'd be angry but I'd realize that he was right…"

"Easier said than done…"

"He is my brother Bella... You aren't alone in this."

"I know… I'm sorry."

"Just get some sleep… You'll feel better in the morning. I promise that if I hear from Edward I'll call you."

She left with that and I just sat on the edge of the bed, willing my phone to ring. I hadn't been away from him in such a long time now and I was afraid to sleep alone.

My phone buzzed again and I looked down to see that someone was calling. An unknown number from an area code that I thought belonged in Florida.

"Hello?" I asked as I accepted the call hoping that it was Edward.

"Are your friends in the room?" My hand began to shake with the deep timbre of the voice.

"No."

"Get on the first flight to Jacksonville and you better be alone."

"Who is this?"

"That's not what matters… What matters is that I have your mother and if you want her to live you'll come here."

The phone went dead before I could respond. The lights in the common room were off and I knew that Alice and Jasper had retired to their room. _I'm sorry Edward._

I didn't bother packing my things again. There wouldn't be a point and it would only weigh me down. Instead, I walked to the desk and scribbled a note. They would find it in the morning. They would know but it would be too late because I would already be there.

**A/N:**

**Please forgive me for how long this has taken and for the well… Subpar posting… I'm not that thrilled with it but it's getting more difficult to write as things are heating up… I hope I'm doing justice.**

**Cliffhanger… Kind of… Sorry about that but I couldn't give it all away and well… I wanted to keep the tension high.**

**Anyways… Only a few more chapters left of this story! But I'm working through figuring out the sequel… **

**Please let me know what you think about this… Like I said… This has been a pretty difficult chapter and I think that's why there was so much dialogue. **

**And thank you to everyone who keeps adding this to your story alerts/favorites. You all are amazing! You're even more amazing when you review!**

**I hope you all had a great weekend. I'm sad to see the end of my Spring Break….**


	34. Chapter 34

**A/N is at the end but first:**

**Thank you to zgirl21 for reading and your input! Go read her stories! Seriously… You'll love them!**

**Now… Onto the story!**

**----------**

**Baby You Can Stop Running  
Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight… Or the few, minor quotes that I have stolen for the purpose of this chapter. I promise there are only a few. **

**Chapter Thirty Four**

_**Bella**_

"Where to love?" The endearment caught me off guard and the thoughts of Edward that I had been trying to repress as I waited seemed to spread like a wildfire in my mind. I closed my eyes, his face, contorted with the pain that I knew would be there when he learned of what I had done lingered and I had to fight the urge to cry. This wasn't the time, and I didn't want to think of him as sad or angry. I wanted to remember his smile and the way he looked at me. It was easier that way; it seemed to justify my actions.

"Where too?" The cabbie repeated; his accent was thick and he stepped out from the driver's seat, presumably because he thought I had bags that needed to be loaded into the trunk. There wasn't a point in packing; I wouldn't need the clothes. That was the one thing I was certain of. I found the strength to open my eyes, to leave Edward and I was met by the old man as he held out his hand.

"SeaTac please," I replied politely as he helped pull me up from my seat on the curb. His eyes were dulled; probably from years of reality and life and the toll it had taken. I was thankful that I would never grow to be that jaded.

"No luggage love?" I shook my head as he opened the door for me.

I sat in the back seat and absentmindedly fiddled with the cell phone that I was gripping with an intensity I was surprised didn't break it. The lights of the city began to fade as we drove further south on I-5 but I couldn't bring myself to look out the window. I was anxious enough as it was, I didn't want to make it any worse; instead, I closed my eyes and leaned my head back against the aged leather and concentrated on taking deep breaths.

"What airline?"

I bit my lip and lifted my head. "Any."

I could see the face he pulled in the rearview mirror; the grimace of a man who knew that I was running. He just didn't know what it was that I was running to. He probably thought I was running from a relationship, or from my family. I wished he could have known that I was running to an end that would fix the lives of the people I have come to love.

He didn't say anything after that; instead he reached forward and pressed a button and the small cab was suddenly filled with what was supposed to be soothing jazz, but in my state seemed only to make my heart race even more. As the saxophone began to intensify, I shut my eyes again. _Breathe in… Breathe out… _It was my mantra and soon, I was stable enough to open my eyes once again.

White lights. Everywhere, there were white lights. There were far too many cars on the road for one in the morning; though I seldom traveled at that hour. _Was it always like this?_ We were far enough out of Seattle that everything was dark; occasionally there was a light coming from an exit, but it was hard to make out much of anything else. Still, the cars still kept moving on the other side of the street, each one growing closer to the city that I was leaving behind, forever.

"Boyfriend cheat on you?" I shook my head at his question. "Then what has you leaving so soon without any luggage?"

"My mother." It was the cliff notes version of the story, but it was all he would get. The short, twenty minute ride to the airport wouldn't even stand to be enough time to tell him the whole thing.

"Where do you have to go?"

"Jacksonville."

"I hope she's all right." His voice was marked with genuine concern and I nodded.

"Me too."

The rest of the drive was sat in silence save for the sounds of Miles Davis, Max Roach, and Sonny Rollins. There had been a time when the music might have been soothing, but all I could think of was that damn piano and that piano led me to Edward and I wasn't ready to deal with that yet.

He pulled up against the curb; I hadn't even noticed that we had stopped when he cleared his throat.

"How much?"

He frowned for a minute, his eyes looking at the meter that read fifty-three eighteen. "Thirty should do it."

I should have protested but the look in his eyes told me that it was pointless. I'd seen that look before, usually when Edward insisted on buying something even though I was more than capable.

I sighed and pulled the money from my wallet and handed it to him and as I was about to move my hand back, his fingers wrapped around it, keeping my hand secure in the warmth of his own.

"Take care." I wondered if he knew; if he could see right through me as everyone else save for Edward seemed to be able to do. Still, we sat there for a moment and I allowed myself to relax in the strangers company; to take from him the sympathy that he gave me as he squeezed my hand. It was as though he was trying to take all the strength he had and give me his own. The intensity of his compassion was overwhelming.

The bright lights of the airport were blinding after the darkness of the night but I found my way to an American Airlines ticketing booth. The woman standing behind it was annoyingly perky; I think, given even if this was a good trip, I would have found her intensity overpowering.

"Where to this morning?" She smiled.

"Jacksonville. I need the first flight out…"

I watched as she typed with fury on the keyboard. "There is a fight at 6:15. I'm afraid it's the first flight out."

I nodded. "I'll take it."

----------

No phone calls. No text messages. I sat down in the seat and looked around as the plane began to fill up. Outside, the sun was beginning to rise and I leaned back against the chair and looked out the small window. They would call eventually, but my phone would be off; it would be fine. I would get out, and it would be over.

"Please fasten your seatbelt." Slowly, I turned to see the flight attendant as she pointed to my lap. With great show, I slipped the metal clasp together and stared at her, wide eyed as she smiled and moved on.

Minutes later I felt the plane as it began to move. I wrapped my fingers around the arms, gripping on tightly. I knew what I was going to and yet, I was absolutely terrified of the take off. It seemed ironic. I was far safer in the plane than I ever would be once I stepped foot onto the Florida soil. I didn't look out the window, instead I looked forward, my eyes not leaving the seat in front of me.

The plane jerked violently once we reached cruising level and the man sitting to my left let out a soft chuckle.

"It's just turbulence."

"I know that." I seethed.

"Afraid of flying?"

I wasn't sure anymore. I had never reacted like this in a plane; there had been the small spasms of fear that would wash over me as the plane began to leave the ground, even when it bounced up and down on the runway when it landed. But never, had I ever been this scared from turbulence. "I suppose so."

"You know that planes are the safest way to travel." He reached over and his hand touched my fingers; my knuckles whiter than the pale color of my skin. "You can relax now."

_If only I could._

I unwrapped my fingers from the armrest and let my eyes travel to the window.

I began to wonder what would happen when Alice happened upon the letter. It would happen any minute now, but I was out of cell phone range and the phone was turned off. I knew, most of all that they would be furious and worried, but I hoped that my letter would explain it all. I was doing what I had to do. It was the only option and the only way that we would ever find our way out of this mess. It would hurt; I knew that they would mourn me, but as time passed, and they would be able to grow old without the threat of someone hurting them, they would thank me and I could watch over them and keep them safe. I would _always_ be with them, and most importantly, I would always be with him.

What it was that was waiting for me, what kind of pain I would be up against, I didn't know… But as the plane traveled on, I seemed to grow calmer. My fate would be unkind, but the ultimate end would be worth it. I had never thought much about how I would die; I assumed that it was a long way off; but I never would have imagined that it would be like this. Still, I couldn't bring myself to regret the decisions that had led me here.

I had dreaded leaving California to go back to Forks when Charlie had been hurt but now, as terrified as I knew I was, I couldn't imagine not making that choice. I never would have been reconciled with Charlie, I never would have seen my brother again or known that he would be well taken care of by the woman that he loved and who loved him back fiercely; but most of all, I never would have met Edward and he never would have shown me that it was okay to love again, that not every man would disappoint me. He had been willing to die for me; and now, I was willing to die for him.

It was a noble way to die, I was certain of that; noble to die for the one that you loved. And it would be good, and it would count for something and he would know that I loved him. It would be more bearable for me to be gone than for me to be alive and without him. Any kind of pain involved in death would be insignificant when compared to the pain I would have to live if he were not by my side. Now, I knew, I would always have him; in my mind, he would always be young and happy and in love with me; and I hoped, that it was how he would see me as well. We would never have the future that I had hoped we would have, but the dreams of that would stay with both of us, forever. Then, one day, he would find a woman who would make his heart beat again and I would watch and guide him and he could create the memories and the future he always wanted with her and I could be happy for him because he would be happy. And that would be enough. Enough for forever, until we could be reunited again.

I leaned back in the seat, pressing the small, round button on the side and let it decline. Sleep. I would need it.

----------

_**Edward**_

"Tacoma," Sam said as he and Charlie looked at a map of the state. "It's close enough to Seattle that we can keep watch on Bella, but far enough away that we can keep them away."

"What about Portland?" I mused aloud. Tacoma was far too close to Bella for my comfort. I wanted this to be as far away from her as possible. If it was possible, I would have gone to another country. My eyes fell on the phone that was resting on the table next to us. There was no word from Alice or Jasper so they had made it there safely. Bella was safe and it calmed my rapid heartbeat. So long as she was safe, everything would be okay.

Sam just shook his head. "I'd have to get the Oregon FBI involved and that would take more time. You want to get this over with no?"

I sighed.

"It's for the best Edward. I understand that you want to do this away from her, but Tacoma is the best place," Sam continued while I gnawed on the inside of my cheek. "I wouldn't do anything to put her in danger. I know how important she is to you… To Charlie. She'll be safe. I promise."

"I wouldn't be going along with this either Edward if I didn't think he was telling the truth," Charlie added, his hand resting on my shoulder. His temperament towards me had changed over the past few days. I wasn't sure exactly what it was that had changed; maybe the fact that he understood that I never wanted to get Bella involved and that I was willing to die for her, but it didn't matter. What mattered now, was that I had his support for this because I needed that more than anything else. I needed him around because I would need him to tell Bella how much I loved her if this all went sour.

"Alright." I nodded and stood up from the chair.

I was just anxious to get this over with. I didn't know exactly how this was going to end and yes, I hoped that it ended favorably for me. There wasn't a bone in my body that didn't want to come back to Bella. I wanted a future with her; I wanted to marry her, to give her everything that she deserved, and I wanted a house full of our children that had her soft brown eyes and my strange hair. I wanted to hold her every single night for the rest of my life and make love to her and eventually, die of old age in her arms while we slept.

"Dad?" I looked up when I heard Emmett's voice, timid, shy, almost as though he was afraid to even be there. I could see the concern etched across his large face and I watched as Rosalie placed her hand softly on his arm. I was jealous for a moment, jealous that the woman that he loved was there with him, was there to comfort him, but then again, he needed it. Still, Bella would come back, I had promised him that, I had promised him that I would always make sure that she was safe and taken care of and goddamn it, she would be.

Charlie looked up at him, his hands dropping the map. "What?"

"I wanted to go to Seattle…" He rubbed his hand against his forehead. "Bella shouldn't be there alone… And I know she's there with his sister but…"

"You've always been there for her in the past and you want to be there for her now?" I said softly and he turned to me and nodded. "I promise she'll be okay." That came out as a whisper and I felt Emmett walk closer to me.

If I didn't know him as well as I did, I would have thought he was going to pummel me, but I knew that behind his hard exterior, he was just worried. We both had that in common and he knew that too.

"I know Cullen. I trust you." He looked at Charlie who was once again talking to Sam. "I might have been angry at first… And I'm sorry about the punch to the stomach, but…"

"Don't apologize," I interrupted. "I would have done the same thing… Hell, I wanted to do the same thing."

"If you get killed… It's going to kill her." His voice was quiet as he sat down in the chair that I had been occupying. "I don't know how I'll get her out of that one. After Jake… I thought that was bad but this is going to be a whole new level of shit."

"I'll come back Emmett… I've got a pretty adept team with me. But…" He frowned and Rose was at his side again, her hand rubbing the tense muscles of his neck. "If… And I mean _if_ something does happen to me… Just let her know how much I love her… And that I'll always love her. And that she better not do anything stupid, because you need her and Charlie needs her."

He nodded and I turned to Rose. "I…" I rubbed the back of my neck with my hand. "I wrote her a letter… Just in case…"

"I'm not giving her anything," she interrupted. "You're coming back."

"Just…"

"I'll hold onto it. Okay?" She sighed and I nodded before reaching into my back pocket and extracting it. Writing that thing had been one of the hardest things in my life, but I had done it; just as I had gotten my affairs in order to be safe. Bella, would always be taken care of; I had made damn sure of that.

She took it between her hands before pulling me into a hug. "If you don't come back, I'll come pull you back from wherever the hell it is you go when you die and _make_ you come back."

I chuckled at her, knowing that she was probably only half lying, but hugged her back as hard as I could.

"Ready?" Sam asked when we pulled away, and I looked towards him and nodded.

"Emmett… Go to Seattle. Stay with her and tell her that I'll call her once it's over," I replied. "And tell her that I love her, and I'll come back."

He nodded and took Rose's hand and I watched as they left. The door shutting loudly behind them.

----------

Three hours. The drive would take three hours and I sat in the back seat of the black Lincoln Town Car, watching as the trees passed, blurring into the darkness of the night. As I sat there, I allowed myself to think of Bella. To see her face behind the darkness of my eyelids. I pushed aside the horror stricken face of this afternoon and instead focused on the happy one, the one that I had seen every day that we had been in San Francisco.

_I growling, pulling her closer to me. "Does he make your heart race?" My voice was husky and jealous and confident I pulled her closer, my cheek against hers, my lips grazing her ear. I could smell the soft fragrance of her shampoo mixed with the salty ocean air and knew that nothing would ever smell that good. "Do I need to hunt him down and show him that you are mine?"_

_I could hear her heart as it pounded in her chest and I wondered if she could hear mine as well. Her knees shook slightly as she went limp in my arms but I held her up and held her close, not willing and not able to let go of her. She shook her head._

"_Say it." I whispered before placing a kiss against the back of her jaw. "Say it."_

"_I'm yours." She replied, her voice breathy and laced with a desire that made my heart soar._

"_You're mine." I replied, firmly before pressing my lips against her own and kissing her hard._

_When I pulled away I saw the pleasurable daze that lingered behind her eyes and I grinned knowing that I had placed that there. She was beautiful and if I had ever been unsure before, I knew that I would spend the rest of my life with her. _

"_Now… Are you done dazzling me?"_

_I laughed and nodded my head. "For now."_

Images of her face flooded my memories and I held on them like a child to a security blanket. I needed her to remain with me. I needed to draw from her for strength. I needed her more than I needed the air that I was breathing.

I wanted to believe that I would come back. I wanted to believe that we would have the future that I had envisioned over and over again in my mind. But I knew I had to be realistic, I had to accept the fact that I could come out of this harmed and that I could leave her behind without me. Still, I hoped that she would know that it would be worth it. Any pain that I would feel at the hands of these men would be worth a lifetime of her safety. If my death meant her life, it was enough. I drew comfort in that and that even if I were to die, I would always be with her, I would never leave her. Either way; one day, we would be together again.

----------

_**Alice**_

Panic. Blind, fucking panic. I shot out of bed and out of Jasper's warm arms. The dream had been enough and I wasn't certain why I hadn't been able to wake up sooner. I could hear Jasper stir behind me but I was out of the room and into Bella's in a matter of moments to find it dark and empty.

_Shit. Edward is going to murder me._ I looked around; everything was in its place, her clothes unpacked in the drawers, her empty suitcase still leaning against the window and yet, she was nowhere to be found. Her purse, gone; her phone, gone.

I heard Jasper behind me, his arm touching my neck causing me to jump.

"She's gone… She fucking left and Edward is going to kill me." He turned me around and was wiping at the tears that I hadn't known I was crying.

"Where did she go?"

I closed my eyes, images of the dream that I had had were quickly running through my conscious mind. "Jacksonville."

"Why?"

"She thinks they have her mother. They aren't even in Washington anymore… She's…" I collapsed into Jasper's arms and began to sob. This wasn't how it was suppose to happen. Everything was suppose to be okay and now, nothing would ever be the same.

"She's what?" He asked softly, his hand stroking my hair. "What's wrong baby?"

"She's made up her mind… She's going to die."

----------

_**Edward**_

Tacoma was the epitome of a shithole. I had driven though it before, but had never had to actually breathe the constant scent of the stagnant paper mills. Even though the walls of the hotel room, I couldn't escape the scent; a putrid mixture of rotten egg and something else that I couldn't quite place. My body was tired though, too tired to still be awake and I could hear the shower in the other room.

My eyes closed, but before I was able to drift to sleep and to wonderful dreams of the woman I was doing this for, I felt the vibration of my cell phone.

"Alice?" I asked, confused as to why she was calling at five in the morning. I could hear her crying on the other end of the line and I could feel my heart race as I began to panic. "Alice what's wrong?"

"It's Bella…" She managed to choke out.

My whole world stopped in that moment. Darkness took over and I could no longer see anything.

----------

**A/N:**

**I did it again… Another cliffhanger… Sorry guys but the story is getting intense and I want to keep that kind of intensity running and the only way to do that is through a cliff hanger.**

**But… You did get it earlier than I had thought! I didn't think this chapter would be out until Friday! So there, two whole days early! Thank the fact that I don't want to deal with reality just right now… **

**And, you should be pleased to know that I have a plan for the next chapter that I've spoken about with zgirl21… Hopefully that means another update isn't two weeks away! Though there will probably be a few more things I'll need to talk with her about.**

**Anyways! I hope that you enjoyed the chapter! The best way to let me know is to click that button that says review!**

**Oh and I don't mean to offend about Tacoma... But I kind of have first hand experience with the city... And the Tacoma Aroma...  
**


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